• Member Since 6th Mar, 2014
  • offline last seen 42 minutes ago

Flutterpriest


T

Cadance is absolute trash. No, you mean it. She always seems to be doing something to tick you off. It doesn't matter if it 's good intentions. She's not cool and never will be.


Part of the B_25 vs Flutterpriest 24 Hour Writeoff

Chapters (1)
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 35 )

This challenge is really bringing out the worst in you, you know that?

I'm here before it does

What the inbred fuck did I just read.

I will always click on something that has that image when I see it. Always.

“I. Do not like you. You will not get me to like you. You are a trash princess. You are worst horse. The only way I could like you, is if you completely change all of who you are as a pony.”

I don't think I've before read a 2nd-person story and thought, 'Yes, this is actually a thing I could see myself saying' as much as I did here :pinkiehappy:

Estee #6 · Feb 2nd, 2019 · · ·

9435946

This challenge

Occupy the entire New column for five minutes?
Write yourself into a coma?
Break the auto-approval button?
Find a way to get FIMFic's first-ever 'general principles' one-day ban?

Final verdict: Cancer/10.

Upvote Confirmed. :rainbowkiss:

HI FLUTTERPRIEST

I felt sorry for Cadance, but I still cracked up.

inb4 reachs the feature box

Still a better story than Hi Anon throwing the game...

I had no expectations as a start, but you managed to go even below them. Well done, good sir, well done.

Do not trust this horse. She is suspicious.

Looks at feature box:
HI ANON, I STOLE THE FEATURE BOX
DON'T CALL ME CUTE
... You can't make this shit up...

I joined the community long after the Candence memes ended so my reaction to this story is : uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

HI ANON!!
I AM MISSING THE BENULTY
I AM THROWING THE GAME!!

I would enjoy her as a new silver, for the fun

9435982
Write themselves into a comma. Much worse fate, being stuck in punctuation.

Silly author. Cadance is best princess.

9439514
It's a subjective opinion, of course I am.

9439178
*laughs in old ponish* you silly foal, everyone knows that Momlestia is best princess

9440635
My pecking order is as follows from least to best:
Luna, Flurry Heart, Celestia, Twilight, Cadance.

The alicorn takes a small pebble with her light blue aura, and tosses it into the light. Almost immediately, dozens of tiny darts shoot from the walls and lodge themselves in the stone.

"Can we try to empty the magazines with more pebbles?"
"No, Your Highness. Each volley is synthesized from pure bullshit."
Cadance nods gravely. "The ancients were so wise in ways we have forgotten."

Also, this Anon has terrible taste. No princess is worst princess.

“HI, ANON! I STOLE THE FEATURE BOX. OPEN IT,” Cadance screams.

*gets blacklisted from ISP for hitting the upvote button too hard*

“BUT WE GET TO HANG OUT AND DO AWESOME THINGS LIKE DO A PILLOW-FORTNITE AND DAB. DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?!”

I play fortnite, and this got me GAGGING...

“I got you blue.”

oh god make it stop

“GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM IM PLAYING MINECRAFT, REEEEEEEE,” you yell back.

HA!!!

Rating: Cancer/10

Good job

9435962
Yeah, I'm wondering that myself.

First I just want to say this made me laugh my ass off and is going in my library in the futile attempts to balance out the sheer amount of cloppery in it!
I need MOAR RANDOMNESS!

9440635

No, Molestia is Best Princess! :P

“But Anon. Anon. Anon!”

“WHAT?!”

Cadance leaps in front of you holding a blue present in her magical grasp.

“I got you blue.”

Alright, you got me. Well done.

Wonderful end twist Preist, congrats and thanks for amother great story

9932766
OMG I LOVE THIS AND THIS IS THE FIRST I SAW THIS

9932909
He’s like that |-(
Whatever reason, beats me *shrugs* just hoping if one day if someone I’m not subscribed to reads one of my stories I’ll have a way to know, karma will return the favor :3

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!