All I want is a place where I fit in. Where people are happy to see me and I'll always have a part to play. Is that so much to ask? HiE, Ponified, powerless alicorn

Life has a weird way of messing with you. You might get screwed here or there, out a job, maybe a stab in the back, nothing you can't get back from. Then there are those times. The times you can't get back from within your wildest dreams. And the universe couldn't cut me a break and make the impossibility simple. Nope, didn't get to stay human, didn't get the luxury of being transmorgified into a pony, griffon, or other, I didn't even end up as an already established pony within the candyland of Equestria!

Nope, for me, I wake up not as Pinkie Pie, but instead inside the mind of Pinkie Pie. Back on the rock farm when she was a filly. My name ain't that important anymore, but Pinkie's taken to calling me Mena. And it's gonna be a long, windy, freaky road ahead, ain't it?

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[Tags will be updated if need be. Dark tag there for overall and reoccurring themes. And while it's not enough to warrant the tag there may be adventure elements from time to time. Critique is welcome and I hope you enjoy!]

Holy cow, featured on day/night one! Thank you muchly so everybody!

9/19/2023: Overall grammar overhaul for existing chapters.

Well, minding your own business doesn't go far when you've got a crazy dragon thing after you. Draconequus, I think?

Then again, he's not really after me as I am after him.

I was simply strolling down the street pleasantly when I get hit by blinding beam of what I suspect was magic. I woke up again, but I wasn't in the street. Or the in the Emergency Room.

I woke up in the middle of nowhere. Literally.

But I woke in a pony's body. Pinkie Pie's to be specific.

I'm in a world where the Element's of harmony never existed, the world is lost to sadness, and my purpose in Pinkie's body is to cheer everyone up- Provided by Discord himself, is some chaos magic to make sure the populace of the world don't all give up in despair.

But I don't wanna be here.

Mort, also known as the Pale Pony (of Death), has been tasked to take time off from his rigorous duties of reaping souls. Seeking guidance, he is directed towards the town of Ponyville, to learn about the magic of friendship from Twilight Sparkle and her friends. All he needs to do is keep his true nature a secret. That shouldn't be too difficult...right?

Special thanks to Specter-Von-Baren and Pyrite Foolsgold for their help in proofreading and editing this story, as I really needed it. Additional thanks to Pilate, Chuckle5, Unimpressive Vagaries and Admiral Biscuit as well! Couldn't have done it without all their help!

Credit for the title card goes to Siansaar, AKA Carnifex.

For another excellent take on Mort, check out Sip's version!

Chapters are corrected, your patience is appreciated. Thank you.

Thanks for their insight and correction goes to:
http://www.fimfiction.net/user/pjabrony

http://www.fimfiction.net/user/BlackWing

http://www.fimfiction.net/user/psychicscubadiver

And biggest thanks goes to, http://www.fimfiction.net/user/Possiblydominator

If you like this story you have them to thank and even if you don't like it you should go give them some love.

Jordan Straw. A generally normal name, unless you work for the syntax corporation, then it is the name of an abomination.

"To say I am normal would be like saying that black people don't like peanut butter and honey sandwiches. Which I do by the way. Though Iv'e been called an abomination by most who have heard of me, I try not to let it bother me lest it become another painful headache causing memory, but sometimes I can take it. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever get to return to a life where I could just sit and play Minecraft and drink Dr. Pepper, or belt out songs with all my heart without fear being caught and destroyed, or worse kept alive and turned into a machine. And then sometimes....sometimes I wonder if Things will be this way forever, with never a safe house in sight(No rest for the wicked, or so I'm told.) and never a breath of fresh air unnacounted for. My name is Jordan Straw, and this is the story of how my life would take a rollercoaster ride all the way to hell(Litterally) and back, and how wishes can suddenly become nightmares.

Ponies belong to all respective owners,
Refrence to other Pony UGC is property of it's respective owners.
Reference to any non pony related things is still property of its respective owners

Humans currently poses an entire intergalactic empire, the aid of their brilliant technologies, and the fundamentals of dark energy have allowed them to succeed to a type three civilisation.
A human named Jack decides to buy a planet called “Harmony” on the intergalactic market. This planet holds residence to dozens of sapient species who all are primitive lifeforms.
He decides to transform into one of the native species, with his intention to cause as much havoc/chaos as possible. At the time of his arrival, most of the world hadn’t seen conflict for well over 1000 years. He plans to change this, by encouraging new ideologies, starting a technological black powder arms race, and ultimately causing wars.

He may look evil to the natives, though according to the intergalactic government, he is implementing nothing illegal. His planet means his rules.

May or may not include Communists

This story is set in Early Season Two, a few episodes after “Return of Harmony”. This is an alternate universe and thus Equestrian girls don't exist, humans are basically just a myth.

Prereader: crimson velvet
Constructive criticism is welcome.

This story is cancelled. I'm currently working on another one, with a similar setting/universe.

This story is a sequel to Distorted Fate

After enduring the task of adapting to being a filly and helping to stop a potential disaster from occurring, one would think that things are finally turning around for me. Sadly... fate will never be that nice to me. Now I have deal with ponies knowing that I was originally an alien, Twilight's desire to learn everything I know, as well as training a team of ponies to handle any interdimensional issues that could come to Equus thanks to Celestia's recklessness. My life just keeps getting worse.

Oh, and everypony said I'm also going to have to go through something else, but I didn't understand the word. Just give me a moment as I look it up. I think it started with a p.

Note: It is recommended to read Distorted Fate first. Also may contain some gore.
Updates Tuesdays and Fridays.

Art: WildSoulWS
Editors: FourponyChapters I-XXXV), Hyari(Chapters I-XIV) PersonalGamer (Chapters XXIX and onward) RockstarRaccoon (Chapters XXXVIII and onward), PinkieThePrankster (Chapters Chapter LVIII and onward)

I was just hoping to get this last job done, always getting sent to this dimension or that, always doing the interests of others. Unfortunately, everyone's luck eventually runs out, and it looks like mine has ran out as well. Now somehow I got stuck in this place, in a foreign body, and things just keeps getting worse for me. What did I do to deserve this?
Note: This is not a HiE story.
Editors: Discord Kantus (Chapters I-XLII), Hyari (Chapters XXXIV and onward), Fourpony
Art: AlicornParty

Ever since the Ponyville clone massacre, one survivor who escaped capture has been living undercover in Manehattan. But when a changeling mistakes her for one of his kind and brings her back to Chrysalis, it marks the beginning of mayhem for everypony.

Set in late season 6. Started for Camp NaNoWriMo, July 2019. Cover art by gordonfreeguy.

Idol Hooves holds a special place in Equestria. He's probably the only exiled changeling to serve in the Royal Guard, or at least, that's what he expects, as exiles don't really broadcast that fact. However, it's well known that Princess Celestia loves all of her little ponies, and her guards perhaps more so, and that makes it one of the best ways for a changeling to discreetly feed.

But how does a changeling even get there, let alone get exiled in the first place? For that matter, why would it ever go to Canterlot? Set a number of years before the series proper, before Luna’s redemption, Idol details how he was exiled, the ponies he’s met, and the series of misadventures that led him to joining the Royal Guard, and should continue a good ways into the series, as something of an alternate perspective.

Soon, he’ll have to deal with a boisterous new princess to serve and a royal wedding in the works bringing a third to power. Will his old instincts bring this new life crashing down around him? What precipitates Chrysalis’s ill-fated assault on Canterlot? Is it really so wrong for a changeling to enjoy good craftsmanship to an obsessive degree?

New cover art provided by the fantastic Carnifex

And a TVTropes page here.

And an Ask Blog of questionable canonity!
Out of Idol Curiosity

Fanart by Norad2! Major thanks! Short For a Royal Guard

Art by Egophiliac of Idol and his Daring Duckie Please don't tell him what that brush is meant for.

Rating updated to (T), it's a bit darker than (E)
Comedy Tag added as well
And changed the character tags a bit.