Shortly after the reveal that the Royal Guard wasn't some massive cloning project, Celestia returned to her duties in Canterlot; leaving the rest of us with damage control. Apparently the mob really liked playing with their torches, because they burnt a large portion of the party decorations. How they managed to avoid burning down the town though, escaped me. Even with magic it was pushing the limit for me; since, Pinkie wasn't involved this time.
However, all this didn't matter to me at the moment as I was trotting down a street with Silver Shield while the Elements and some members of the Royal Guard were cleaning up the mess. I could have lent a hoof but they insisted that I should have the day to myself, since the party was ruined. Pinkie seemed to be finally affected by how the party went, judging by how her mane was partly deflated. This only served to give me more of a grudge as I tried to find my target. It wasn't long before I caught sight of Diamond Tiara with her lackey. "Silver, see those two fillies?"
"Yes madam... err... I mean sir... I mean..." Silver started to say. Since he was going to be aiding me in training the recruits when they arrive, Celestia debriefed him on my true nature, which apparently included my gender change.
"Just go with the proper terms for a mare, seeing that I am now one anyway," I dryly replied. "Anyways, just make sure those two fillies don't get away, or do anything stupid. I have a score to settle with one of them."
"While I have given my word to protect you, I can't just let you harm foals on a whim."
"Oh I'm not going to harm them, unless they throw the first punch. Just stay here, that's an order." Sadly, the short chat with my new 'protector' drew the attention of the terrible two as Diamond glared at me; though, Silver Spoon had some common sense as she looked at me with terror.
Trotting up to them, I was about to open my mouth when Diamond beat me to it. "What are you doing here, you evil alien! Shouldn't you be halfway across Equestria right now?"
Giving her a deadpan look, I replied, "Do you really think it's a good idea to taunt an alien when she's less than ten feet away from you?"
Turning her nose up, Diamond said, "Well, since that guard is behind you, it seems to me that you've been caught and are being made to apologize to me for hurting me. Maybe if you grovel to me enough, Celestia won't banish you to the moon."
Tilting my head with my jaw half opened, I wondered just how much of an ego this filly has. "Silver Shield, come over here and explain to this idiot whatever Celestia wants the public to know me as."
"Hey, I'm not an idiot, you're the idiot!" Wow, nice comeback for an ignoramus, I thought to myself as Silver Shield joined us.
"Due to the word about Aether's origins being partly revealed, it is true that she wasn't a resident of our world, Equus. However, in light of certain events, Aether has proved herself a valuable source of information and experience that Princess Celestia desires to be utilized to its fullest potential. Henceforth, Aether is given a role of both an instructor and a leader of a newly created squad of ponies meant to defend Equestria from threats we never encountered before. In laypony terms, this means that Aether technically holds an officer position in the Equestrian military," Silver Shield explained.
As Diamond Tiara blinked in surprised at the unexpected news, I simply smirked at her. "You do realize that since you were a major factor in the forming of a mob that was practically calling for my blood, that you are partly responsible for an assault on a member of Equestria's... err..."
"Government, madam?"
"Yeah, that. Furthermore, Princess Celestia is highly interested in my well-being, so she wouldn't like anything bad happening to me, and much less the pony that is responsible for the harm. You could potentially be imprisoned for a long time for your actions Diamond."
At this little revelation, Diamond was starting to sweat. "T-there is no way you can prove that! Even if you bring me to court, my daddy will hire the best lawyers in Equestria to prove my innocence!"
"That's assuming that Celestia just doesn't find you guilty herself and skip the whole trial process to imprison you in her dungeon," I said, keeping my grin as I started to walk around her. "That is if she doesn't turn you to stone or banish you to the moon. Wait, she might not do that last part, ‘cause then everypony will have to see your face on it and nopony would want to see that."
At this point, Diamond was shaking in fear, her eyes widening with horror of the thought of being turned to stone. Problem with foals, they're just so gullible, I thought to myself as I held back a chuckle. Before Diamond could regain her composure, I continued, "Thankfully, for you. I managed to keep Princess Celestia from knowing that you're responsible."
This caused Diamond to look at me with a disbelieving look as she squeaked out, "Why would you do that?"
"Oh, it's quite simple. If you were imprisoned or turned to stone, how will I get you back for the mob myself? Besides, I rather be the one dishing out the punishment, and you already saw the kind of revenge I prefer to do," I answered as my grin took on a more manic look. "Besides, what caused you to think that angering an alien was a good idea? You have no idea what I am truly capable of, do you?"
This caused Diamond to whimper in fear as her eyes began to shrink in horror. Silver Spoon was also fearful, but not as much as her friend, having not being the cause for the mob. Poking Diamond, Silver Spoon said, "Diamond, are you alright?"
"Oh, relax you two, Diamond isn't going to get hurt... for now. Though you might want to check under your bed before you go to sleep now, Diamond. Because for all you know, I could be right underneath it, ready to get my revenge on you!" I declared with glee, though some of the adults turned their heads towards me. Apparently whatever Celestia told the ponies wasn't enough for a few of them were giving me suspicious looks, but at least it wasn't outright hostility.
Just as I was about to fully enjoy the sight of Diamond shivering in fear from my 'threats', Pinkie suddenly showed up between us as she exclaimed, "Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon! There you are, I was looking for you two. It was sad that not everypony gotten their cake from Aether's cute-ceañera, so I baked cupcakes to make up for it! enjoy your cupcakes!" Putting a cupcake down for both the fillies, Pinkie gave us a large smile before bouncing off.
Bearing a smug grin after seeing my bewildered look at Pinkie's departure, Diamond said, "Well well well, seems like Pinkie Pie doesn't see me at fault for the mob. I guess that means you can't do a thing to me after all, you stupid alien." As I gritted my teeth in fury, I watched the two fillies grab onto their cupcakes and take a bite out of them while Diamond kept sneering at me. Before I could say anything to wipe that sneer off her face though, her eyes suddenly widen as she dropped her cupcake.
Noticing what Diamond did, Silver Spoon asked, "Diamond? What's wrong?" Instead of getting a response, Diamond started to shake as she began to sweat. Even I was getting a bit curious till her face started to redden as her shaking gotten worse.
Silver Spoon was about to ask a question again when Diamond abruptly jumped into the air, her face now completely red as she screamed, "Hot!" She then started running down the street, steam actually coming out of her nose and mouth.
As Silver Spoon simply gaped at the scene, I quirked an eyebrow as I said, "Hmmm... guess Pinkie is mad with Diamond too. So Silver Spoon, are you going to finish your cupcake or are you going after your friend instead?"
After watching Silver Spoon chase after the brat, I led Silver Shield to the Sugarcube Corner due to needing to pick up something. As we were heading up the stairs, I asked, "So, how far is Princess Celestia with... government stuff she has to take care of for this squad I'm going to train?"
"While I have been informed about the necessity of the squad and my role in regards to it, I regret to say that I wasn't informed about anything else on that matter."
"What a disappointment," I replied as we reached my room. Opening the door with my magic, I went inside while Silver stood outside, looking conflicted.
"Madam, judging by the bed, I take it this is your room. Do you wa—"
"I'm only here to pick up some stuff, so just wait a moment." Grabbing my saddlebag, I opened my toy chest to dig up the Maralus shards that I kept at the bottom. Placing them in my saddlebags, I turned around only to see Silver staring at me with a shocked expression.
"Is that what I think it is?"
"Oh, good, the princess saw fit to inform you of that as well," I replied with a roll of my eyes as I walked out of my room.
"How did you got your hooves on them, and why were they in your... toy chest?"
"Oh, I just snuck into the forest when the first probe explosion occurred. Hey, were you among the guards sent to search the forest?"
"No, that was a different detachment."
"Ah, good. Hopefully you're better trained than the others, since I was able to slip by all of them with ease," I nonchalantly said as I led Silver out of the bakery. "Hey, keep an eye out for Twilight, I need her for something."
"Yes madam," Silver replied as he took a serious look as he scanned the ponies around us, until I let out a snort of amusement that caused him to look at me. "Something the matter, madam?"
"You guards are way too serious about your work aren't you?"
"We have to be, we serve an important role in Equestria."
"Doesn't mean you have to take on such a serious expression. Even if other ponies say I'm too serious for my age, I don't go taking on such a serious expression when I'm doing something like looking for a pony. Besides, from where I come from, looking that serious all the time means you have something very important. That usually ends up with you becoming a target for certain... ponies."
Silver's eyes lost focus as he thought about what I said, before replying, "Understood madam. Also, I believe I spotted Princess Twilight Sparkle." Pointing a hoof, I followed its direction to see Twilight cleaning up one of the games that was destroyed by the mayhem earlier.
Trotting over to her I said, "Twilight, can you stop cleaning for a moment? I need you for a few things."
"What do you need Aether?" Twilight asked, stopping her cleaning, only for a member of the Royal Guard to take over.
"Well, a couple of things. First thing though is I retrieved my Maralus shards. I think it's best that we stash them in your lab, safer in the long-term if they were there then where I had them."
"Alright, but where did you have them in the first place?"
"Like I'm going to tell you that," I answered, only for Twilight to pout a bit as we headed to the library.
"So what else do you need from me?"
"Well, since I was nearly attacked by the mob due to not being able to escape them fast enough, I think I need a faster way of escaping danger. So why not ask you to teach me how to teleport?"
At this, Twilight stopped to turn at me as she yelled, "Teleport! Teleportation isn't a simple spell Aether! You have to have years of tra—" before I shoved a hoof into her mouth. This caused Silver Shield to gasp at what I done, but before he could said a thing I shushed him.
"Twilight, remember that you said my special talent is related to magic? Also remember how well I grasped the other spells? It may take time, but it would be best if I learn how to teleport for my own protection. You can't be near me every time I need some saving Twilight. Besides, it wouldn't be fair if I teach you so many things and you refused to teach me some magic in return. Just remember, I was an adult before I came to this world, so don't always think of me as a mere foal."
After looking at me for a minute, Twilight sighed. "Fine, you do have a point there. However, I don't want you to try teleporting on your own until I say you're ready. You have a tendency to jump ahead with things, but this is something that is too dangerous to do without being sure. You understand?"
"Of course I understand Twilight, teleportation isn't something to take lightly. I know the consequences of someone not being careful about teleportation."
"Wait, consequences?"
"Twilight, dimensional nations may not have magic, but some do have the means to create devices to allow teleportation. As for consequences... it can get really messy for the poor pony that had a bad teleport," I answered, as I watched with amusement at Twilight going green at the thought.
Though, I can't wait till I can do teleportation. Oh the things I can do to Diamond Tiara with that spell on hoof.
The day DT receives her Karma is a great and glorious day in the motherland.
THE ULTIMATE TELEPORTROLL
Aether might have been an adult, but her knowledge is now wrapped in a child's mindset.
Should be chase.
ah yes a bad teleport is squick inducing
How devious~ :D
hehehe, nice job, nice job!
PINKIE FTW!
Yah... in my opinion, this is going to go bad in under 72 hours.
In other news: loved the chapter! Hope to read more soon.
So, when are you finally revealing the Cutie Mark Crusaders Interdimensional Scout Squadron?
It's not like we didn't figure that out from day one. :P
Plant the idea of fear into their heads and let them do the work.
Best kind of punishment.
lets hope something doesn't end up fused to the wall
Diamond Tiara found out why you dont mess with Pinkies cupcakes?
Teleport, yay.
Bad roll. You get stuck in a wall.
Really bad roll, You end up at location 0,0 of local gravity well. As in, centre of the planet.
Roll 1, roll 20. You teleport exactly into the point you currently occupy, causing your mass to try and occupy the same spacetime simultaneously, causing it to rotate into photons that can do such, but which explode out at teh speed of light, removing the nearest few miles of geography from geology.
TL:DR. Dont cross the streams.
Having an end objective is always the best incentive to learn something hard.
6204943
Community Service would do DT a lot of good.
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If Aether is able to intentionally flub the teleportation spell so that it's fatal for the target than it'd be a very very useful spell to use on hostiles too.
6205182
That was the first thing that went into my head when I was reading that part of the chapter.
Fantastic chapter I couldn't stop laughing. This is the only series I read as soon as I see an update, so thank you for your work.
Eh, two out of three. Maybe three in the future. Good chapter.
Wait, how the heck was this story NOT on my liked/favorites list?
This issue has now been resolved.
6204838 But... If you teleported to where you are, wouldn't you just not go anywhere? Also, if you got stuck in a wall, ** you would cause nuclear fusion because you're occupying the same space. Boom. Also photons kinda always move at the speed of light or nigh on it, so they would just do what a normal photon does, bounce off of shit, and if you fused with something, you don't just turn into a burst of light*
*Insert **
This.... Is... Awesome
6206594
This is part of the maths and thinking that covers Alcubierre navigation, gravity tramline jumps, hyperspace transitions, wormholes and teleportations amongst likely others.
Its a simple parameter, that of exclusion.
If you dont know about it, or dont take account of it in certain operations, then you can more than often get atomic interpenetration, that is, because atoms are mostly empty space, the nuclii from you can end up within and between the electron orbitals of the object you arrive in. Even if you were lucky, and the result was energetically stable, it would be messy.
The two values you then consider, are that of exclusion, repulsion. Pauli exclusion principle comes to mind. Trouble is, if you use inverse square repulsio, you get lifted out of the local gravity well as far as your energy will take you, until you start to hit the Lagrange points. This is how Gravity Tramline hyperjumps actually work. Somewhere between inverse 3- inverse 6 means your mass on arrival, is pushed away from local mass, such that you get pushed away from walls, and the ground, and the air and water gets pushed away from you. Giving the Pop of many authors idea.
If you inverse the value, and go for attraction by accident or design, which depending on how the whole function is definied, could be a plus instead of a minus, or even an 1 instead of an i, if you were extra careful and went for a very high repulsion factor for safety, you could end up making it so that each nucleon finds other nucleons extremely attractive on arrival, causing them not just to fuse, but dimentionally rotate and convert into light energy. That being maybe 200 kg of pure hard gamma radiation where 1 kg is a 10 Megaton yield thermonuclear device equivalent.
So, yes. Teleportation and other FTL technologies can have the most unfortunate side effects.
In fact, one problem so far known with the Alcubierre device, is that on arrival, all the energy in its warp field, is released as a shaped energy charge ahead of it, some calculations sho, vapourising the planet if you aim correctly.
Given what we see in the universe, it seems either that problem has been solved, or noone uses it in such a way.
Im waiting to see if the new Pentaquark is a bound meson state, like a nuclear molecule, or if its a tesseract nucleon.
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Plant the fear, do a few things every now & then, never do anything too public or too often, and watch what happens. The fact that this could if Aether gets too creative could destroy Diamond mentally is both a bonus and a negative. The problem with this though is that you have now a future rich, paranoid pony who is somehow charismatic enough to get others to listen to her. That if she isn't watched enough could bite Aether in the flank years from now.
Though trolling the hell out of Diamond Tiara is going to be satisfying as hell. Also it is awesome that Aether is gonna make his unit much more chill if her interactions with Silver Shield is anything to go by.
6206594 unless we are using a certain universe's phisics in which case the atoms are moved out of the way, or the idea that the sphere teleport exchanges all matter.
6204838
Actually, superposition of particles happens all the time, just not on a macro scale. "Fusing" with a wall would be catastrophic for the teleportee, but not much else, and being teleported into the center of mass of the nearest gravitationally strong body would require a lot more magic than just nothing happening.
It's more likely a 'splicing' event will occur, in which a person or persons will leave a part of themselves behind, causing instant separation of cells at a sub atomic level.
Unless the teleportation turns the atoms of the teleportee into a stream of particles that is later put back together, in which case it is more likely that the person will end up as a quantum goo.
Or if the teleport exchanges the matter within the two spaces simultaneously, then none of these scenarios is as likely as another.
Are you nuts? She's just a school bully.
I hope Aether realizes it's best to not go overboard here...
6209174 I think she is considering less "teleport her colon inside her skull" revenge and more "teleport into her room and leave notes saying shes watching" causing Diamond to live in a constant state of fear.
6207490 I'm honestly surprised anyone on this site could make me go "Wtf are you saying?!". Well done.
6254611 the best part is. I understood it.
6204838 actually if u teleported into something wouldn't it just move atoms out of the way since it has to do that for air anyways? Maybe it teleports the atoms u teleport into back to where u teleported from
6358521 Air isn't bound together by molecular bonds, and it's also many times less dense than something solid. A solid object won't just kindly get out of the way.
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In these comments: Teleportation Theory, Scientific Principles, and Everything Complicated to Fuck With Your Mind. I'm proud of you all.
6207490
6254611
6270106
Me, too
6210509 At the very least, Aether now has justification to use her as a "training aid" prop for her future team--provided it doesn't go too far, Celestia would probably approve
hmm, teleport a steel sword into an identical one in the same position. What would be the result?
6791481
The result would be that the steel swords atoms would firmly join making either a smaller but stronger sword or resulting in an explosion with the same effect as a nuclear bomb.
Wait a minute... if foals are like 20, then how old are adults?
7402527 69 ;)
6791481
in the stories by Estee, that would produce "recoil", causing the teleported object to go flying away.
yay another 'alien-in-the-body-of-a-foal-who-also-needs-a-guard-escort' fic. those are always my favorites
8335250
read the prequel. If you have, then fuck you. If this was not sarcasm, forget I said anything.
Spicy cupcake revenge is the best.
shoulda used Celestial Grade Laxatives