Chapter LIII: Scapegoat
"Just how bad are you lot at st—" I started to say when I spotted a bush shake too much, drawing my rifle fire. "As I was saying, just how bad are you at staying undetected? Some of you are going to be sent on stealth missions, and he— wait a second."
Firing off my gun again, I watched as an assigned flight group retrieved their fallen comrade as fast as they can. Today's exercise consisted of my troops trying to move through an outer portion of the White Tail Woods, from a start point to an end point, using whatever cover they can to avoid my watchful eye. The field length was two hundred feet long with a width of fifty feet, while I was in an eight foot tower set five feet away from the edge, giving me a better view of the area.. While not part of the dense forest center, I chose the region we were in due to the fact that we would be operating in even this much cover were unlikely at best. Meanwhile, the flight group was practicing troop recovery in regards to both speed and handling of their package. They would get their turn under fire after they get some practice. To my irritation, the flight group was getting a workout today.
"I'm surprised that you can spot their movement, even if they're on the edge of the assigned area, madam," Silver commented as he watch me fire yet another shot.
"Well, when you don't want to be eaten by the local fauna—or even flora—on whatever world you end up going to, you have to learn to pick things out quick. That, or enjoy being torn to bits and going for a dip in a pool of acid," I replied, before firing off two more shots.
"Why must you be so descriptive of potential consequences of failure all the time?"
"Cause my former life sucks, and I like to get it off my chest from time to time. Oh, and sometimes fear can be a good motivator," I answered, before picking off Dusk Cloud, who was around thirty feet from the end. Even my first group of recruits couldn't reach the end, which caused me to reconsider what future actions I would need to take.
"My dear, aren't there other ways to motivate your minions? Maybe with a little bit of chaos?" said a familiar voice from behind me, causing Silver and I to turn around.
"Discord? What are you doing here?" I asked while I looked at him lounging on a giant banana. Some idiot popped their head out of the bush when they heard Discord's name escaping my lips, earning a shot for being distracted.
"Oh, I was just roaming about today, hanging with all my friends. Except for Twilight, she's busy with organizing her books. Can't tell for the life of me why that mare does such things," Discord explained, while I just nodded in turn. I couldn’t fathom a reason Twilight would spend three whole days on reorganizing her books, when they're already sorted out, but sometimes it’s just best not to ask too many questions when Twilight was involved. "And since I spent time with the rest of my friends, I thought to drop by and spend some good old quality time with my dear friend, Aether."
"Well, that is thoughtful of you, but I'm a bit busy trying to whip these poor saps into shape," I responded. Since Discord was always fine with fulfilling my request, due to the fact that they tend to cause chaos to my troops in so many ways, we were getting along just fine. As long as he didn't trap me in anything or send me off to parts unknown.
"Oh, let me help you that," Discord said, snapping his talons to teleport all the recruits into a nearby clearing, trapped in a giant green transparent block of gelatin.
After giving the block a double take, I yelled, "Discord! I want to train my troops, not suffo—"
"Relax, they're fine. I made sure that they can still breathe," Discord replied with a roll of his eyes.
After eyeing him for a moment, I turned my attention to my recruits before I shouted, "Alright, change of plans, we’re switching to escape training! Your job is to get out of this... glob before sundown. If you get out early, you can have the rest of the day off to clean yourselves and your uniforms. Oh, and no magic! Everyone has to rough it out the old fashion way."
"My my, you're being awfully nice today, Aether. Normally you like to push your troops to their limits."
"Nice? Look at that Discord," I countered as I pointed a hoof at the gelatin block. "Even if they make it out early, they're going to be busy washing that gunk off their themselves and their clothing. It could take hours for all I know, depending if the uniforms aren't ruined."
"Don't worry your adorable head, you need to relax more or your head just may come off!" Discord said, patting my head before his head fell off his body. I just kept a stoic expression as I waited till he retrieved his head. "Sometimes you're a spoilsport like Twilight, even though I thought you were taking after Pinkie. Now that mare knows how to have fun."
"You're the one interrupting me while I'm at work. What did you expect?" I asked, tilting my head before I narrowed my eyes at him as I realized something. "Wait a minute, you never come and see me while I'm training this lot. Why are you here?"
"Why I never, how dare you accuse me of not wanting to spend some time with a dear friend. Why, at this rate you'll be a miniature Twilight if you keep it up. All you need is to have her mane and tail and you'll be a darker, grumpier version of her. In fact..." Discord replied, before snapping his talons. I just deadpanned at him when I felt a presence on my head, till I grabbed it with my hoof and threw a filly sized wig at his face. That only caused him to laugh before he said, "I was wondering if you ever were going throw something at my face."
"What are you talking about?"
"For an observant filly, you can be so dense about some things. Didn't you notice that you have a habit of throwing things at people's faces?" Discord answered with a grin before he started to walk around me, though his head remain in place. "From what I heard, it started with Twilight, but I had a real laugh when you threw a chair at Celestia. I wonder who's next on your list? Queen Chrysalis?"
Letting out an exasperated sigh, I replied, "Hey, it's just me letting out my frustration in a somewhat violent way. It's not like something I planned, it just happens to people who make me mad."
"And that, my dear, is one of the things I like about you," Discord responded, causing me to tilt my head in confusion. "You act on your whims, being spontaneous with your actions just like Pinkie Pie, though not as much as her. Combine that with your given nature, and you're just a bundle of chaos that gets unleashed over and over again, each time just as amusing as the last."
Rolling my eyes, I said, "Of course you like me for that, I could tell after we first met. Though I'm surprised that you actually like me for things other than that."
"Oh don't be so silly, you're one of the few ponies that accepted me for who I am. You didn't even bat an eye at my antics, you just took it like a pro."
"Okay... but, you're bringing us off topic. What is your real reason for being here?" I asked, stomping a hoof down to emphasize that I was tired of Discord's redirection of the conversation.
"Fine, you killjoy. I'm here because I find your desire to use another world as a scapegoat for Equus to be quite fascinating," Discord finally answered, placing his claws on his hips while turning his head up like he was some noble snob.
I, on the other hand shouted, "How in Tartarus do you know about that‽"
"Simple, I read your notes," Discord explained while waving about a folder that I instantly recognized to be the one I normally kept in the locked drawer of my desk.
"Another world... as a scapegoat? What is he talking about?" Silver finally said, causing me to roll my eyes at the two.
"Basically, since we have access to magic, and whatever Discord us—"
"Chaos magic my dear, the best kind of magic around," Discord cut in, wearing a foam finger and a shirt with a big number one on it.
Give him a flat look, I continued, "Moving on, with regular magic and chaos magic, maybe we could set up some kind of system that funnels dimensional intrusions that are aimed at Equestria to another world. If successful, then we can force an invasion on our terms more than we previously could, or even avoid it entirely. It would be a better use anyway than having the world serve as an evacuation point, and I don't plan to use some other species' world as the target. Best if we just use a world that uninhabited by any sapient species for that goal."
"That is actually tactically sound, has that been done before?" Silver asked.
"There's nothing that I know of that is similar to that idea, but remember that I was just a grunt in interdimensional affairs. I wouldn't be surprised if some organizations have something like that already set up or at least were capable of doing so. If not, then, if we can achieve that, we'll have an edge that they probably wouldn't know how to counter for some time," I answered, before looking at Discord. "Seeing that you already know my plan, is it actually possible?"
"Why are you asking me? Shouldn't this be a question for Twilight? She is the science-obsessed one, after all," Discord replied.
"Cause I doubt she would have the answer and probably would drive herself nuts trying to find the means to create such a set-up. From what I heard, that normally won't end well. You, on the other hoof, would be more likely to know if you can do it, even instantly. So please, give me a serious answer this time, Discord, it is something that both of us would be truly benefit from having, after all."
Rubbing a claw through his beard, Discord answered, "I can't say for certain, chaos magic is unpredictable after all. However, it may be possible. Starswirl did punch holes that lead to other worlds after all, so figuring a way for your plans to work wouldn't be as far-fetched." I was slightly disappointed that I didn't get a confirmation, but it was far better having a chance of something than having no chance. I was about to open my mouth to ask something when Discord continued. "And I know what you're going to ask next. Yes, I will lend a claw to whatever plans you ponies come up with. Like you said, I don't want to see a war coming to Equestria either. Sure, it has some chaos, but not the sort that I find amusing."
Nodding, I responded, "Good to have you on board at least, that certainly would help in the long run, possibly." Looking at my troops, I saw that they weren't making any progress in their new task. "Hey, do you have any other ideas that I could use to train my troops with?"
"Are you suggesting that I should keep tossing your minions into chaotic situations?" Discord asked, a wide grin appearing on his face that my own muzzle was starting to mirror.
"That's the plan," I simply answered, while Silver simply shook his head at us.
"I feel so bad for your recruits, madam," Silver commented, causing me to cock an eyebrow at him.
"Do you want to join them then? Or do you have anything else to say?"
"...I'll shut up."
"Good, I don't need more whiners, I’ve already got Windbag and Stalwart for that role."
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Oh aether... Never change
This soooo amusing to read.
KUUDERE!
But seriously, Aether does have several problems.
Dark view of the world.
Anger management issues.
Seriousness.
Slight OCD.
Possible Asperger's Syndrome in the fact that she is also slight, VERY slightly self centered.
Self centererd in the fact that she thinks SHE has to solve everything.
Also fact that she believes her solutions tend to be the best.
Sooo we've seen those recruits train for some time now, when are we gonna see if it is effective?
Windbag and Stalwart would have to level up, way up, to be Stadtler and Waldorf?
Course Im late, Its amazing how many things disagree with me.
Dimentional shifts can have all kinds of effects, so, how about an invisible maze where the local rules of locality, reality and causality change as you are within it?
6789184
When they have a mock battle/competition with the standard military and mop the floor with them.
6789279
The first batch already did that once.
6789145 Well, I gotta admit the following: In the very least, she thinks she has to be there when people solve interdimensional problems. But to be honest? Re-read the christmas-chapter. She obviously doesn't think she has to solve the problem there. And considering she has the most knowledge about interdimensional things, her solutions tend to be the best.
And seeing how you said she believes they TEND to be, not that she believes they always ARE, means that you admit that she admits when her solution isn't the best. I am pretty sure we haven't seen her do that yet, but hey, your wording.
Maybe a gravity zero training? Or go to point A to Point B as they shoot lasers to them? Hijack a vehicle? Try to rescue a hostage? Maintain a hostage and defeat beings that try to rescue the hostage? Turn them into foals and let them try to go to a certain point? Run away from a big machine? Destroy a enemy ship or take control of it? (With the help of Luna, they can use dreams to do that) Ask a dragon to help them train?
This has been featured so many times that i couldn't even count. This perhaps is one of the most successful fan fiction that that have come across thanks to the speed you write this in and the good story plot that we could all rely on. This keeps on surprising me because less then 2 hours you got so many views from people.
On the other note let's put the recruits together in an arena and see which of them are the better fighters
Close one Silver, nearly got your arse thrown to the fire.
How about asking for other more equiped Equestrias for reinforcement?
I imagined one of my OCs as one of Aether's recruits. I feel bad about it now.
I've been wondering when discord would help with the training in a more active role. I knew it was going to happen.
I like this scapegoat plan, very clever. though I would also suggest that they figure out how to make a localized breach in the barrier that has invaders warping into a kill zone or trap.
I forget: has Aether covered wilderness survival??? I can see her having Discord warp the recruits to various environments like deserts, snowy mountains, jungle, etc and making them spend a few days surviving with only a few basic tools.
That's a surprisingly clever idea and much, much better as a first line of defense than setting up a tiny team of special forces against a potential enemy that could, you know, send the militaries of entire worlds at them. I like it. It might actually have a chance of realistically working.
6789431 My wording is exactly as I meant it to be.
6791989 Cool, so I got it right. Nice!
6791996 Tese are problems, but they're sall ones.
6789143 KUUUUUUUUUUUUUDERREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
6792585 KKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
6789244
nah, Stadtler and Waldorf are hecklers and trolls pure and simple. Windbag and Stalwart are just pathetic
6792598 KKKKKKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
6792647 ICE AND SUGAR!
6792658 ICE CREAM AND SPRINKLES
6792795 We're done... Sorry. PM me if you wish to continue.
6792894 Okay.
6792990 Great!
Well, I'm finally caught up on this and I must say I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. On the one hand, Aether is a wonderful character, the writing is generally excellent, and Pinkie is written well which is very unusual, but on the other hand it has some serious problems.
The most obvious and easily fixed is the lack of editing which is especially frustrating because many of the older chapters are edited, but the new ones appear to be coming out loaded with errors. The result of this is that I cannot help but think that you could fix things before you publish them but choose not to.
The second is that you have written Rainbow Dash as an extremely flat caricature which does a huge disservice to the most complex character in the show. This is not a huge problem because she is such a minor character in this story, but it is still a serious problem when she does show up.
That said, both of those pale in comparison to the third problem which I am very worried will completely kill this story in the future and is the reason I am unwilling to give this a thumbs up until it is finished. In short, your descriptions of the alien society put it firmly in grimderp territory. You seem to be making things bad for the sole sake of making them bad and ignoring all logic to the contrary which completely destroys suspension of disbelief. They clearly have the technology to make all this stupidity completely unnecessary, especially given the fact that modern automation tools are rapidly approaching post-scarcity, and you have clearly demonstrated the remaining technologies are in regular use by aliens. There is no reason for them to do the shit to Aether that you said they did because they could easily build a fully automated production line for robots that would do the same job better and be completely free because the automated line would be able to mine for resources, refine them, and turn them into finished products without any oversight or external input. They could also easily build similar automated production facilities for everything else the population needs to survive. Also, none of your silly ruthlessness arguments hold any water because they could very easily do the same thing for weapons of war and even factories for producing war machines which will easily overwhelm any other economic system in a war because money does not win wars on its own.
Anyways, I will definitely be reading this for the foreseeable future even if you do not fix the editing mess, but I am really hoping you avoid any major involvement with the stupid alien society because that will probably kill the story for me.
6795389 That issue has been brought up in Distorted Fate in the comment section of Chapter 43. All I can say for now is that with every society, there are good parts and bad parts.
Bare in mind that I pump out chapters faster than my editors can edit them, and I had a blog asking about this issue. People voted for unedited chapters to go up, so hence the large amount.
6795489 The logic still doesn't hold up no matter how you look at it. CheshireTwilight seems to have hit the core logic well enough, but if you have any further questions about why what you have described is impossible I will be happy to answer them either here or in a PM if you want to share spoilers to better discuss things.
As for editing, that is not what I would have voted for, but you should really try to get more editors to get back on top of things and have them start with the chapters you are releasing rather than the old ones to minimize the number of unedited chapters people have to read.
6792647
What in the Tartarus? Also KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!right?
Aether + Discord = Most Brutal Training Regimen in the Universe.
I've noticed you have a lot of unedited chapters. I could edit for you if you want (even if your current one in the description is still around, 2 heads are better than one :P).
Hahahaha, another great chapter, nice little convo with Aether and Disc.
Keep it up!
LOL
This makes up for the last chapter which I did not like.
6792647 KANEDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
The more I read about Aether's plan to redirect invading forces to other planets the more i realize just how stupid it could be for her to do that. I mean what if the planet they send the invaders too is more advanced and found Equis's location? It's a bad double edged sword.
7608017 I think you missed something here. Aether said she wanted to send them to some uninhabited world and didn't want to subject a sapient species to an invasion they weren't even part of.
7727281
HisdenMaster, zalla661is saying ‘what if the other world that they created a portal to had a carnivorous species that invaded their world.’
I liked that line!!
8750501
Uh, might want to read over the conversation again.