A Christmas Special: Thermonuclear Presents for everyone!
“It may look like I'm doing nothing, but in my head, I'm quite busy.”
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A Christmas Special: Thermonuclear Presents for everyone!
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READ!
THIS CHAPTER IS NON-CANON! THIS IS NOT OFFICIALLY APART OF THE STORY!
I am bored.
So bored in fact, that I am willing to forgo everything I have developed on this planet thus far, for the greater good of astonishing entertainment, and what better way to spice things up a little, by literally dropping an extreme load of Hydrogen and Uranium-235 on every organism imaginable?
After all, I love the fresh smell of charred corpses and burned cities in mourning, it’s the kind of thing that wakes me up from my lingering sleep.
And since it’s Christmas, or an equivalent of ‘Hearts Warming’ for Equestria, I may as well deliver all my gifts the old fashioned way.
The Reader (You): “So it must be Santa’s Reindeer Slay—“
No, that would be incorrect. That doesn’t hold the true Christmas spirit.
Missiles, on the other hand, do.
They hold the positive Christmas spirit.
Particularly Missiles with thermonuclear warheads on them, nothing is wrong with little extra heat in a pony’s everyday life, right?
The ground rumbled and bucked, expelling various unnatural engine sounds as an entrance slowly pulled a large flower bed apart, only to reveal a futuristic metallic structure carrying a large number of tall metal cylinders. Each painted a varying amount of green and red splotches, along with the crudely printed text of ‘Merry Christmas!’
These strange geometric shapes began to drum out excess thick, boiling, white gas. The resulting compression contributing to the accelerating lift off, at varying intervals. The insanely chilly fog condensed with the warm, bright sun as it flowed, and spilled into the surrounding environment.
The singular, radioactive symbols stamped onto the sides of each missile glinted in the sunlight, it was almost like they were breathing a sign of foreseen happiness. To finally do what they were designed to do.
Angry black smoke leaking from the panels, and cracks, between the rockets’ shell, slowly rose, forming indistinct objects that seemed to be reminiscent of ‘flipping the bird’. It was like the inanimate substance was attempting to give one last message to the planet before it fucked it’s surface.
Finally, the metallic cylinders rose up, high into the air, accelerating at absolutely ridiculous speeds, speeds that no pony could ever hope to achieve. If there was a name to define a ‘group of rockets’, it surely wouldn’t be even close enough to explain the sheer amount, and beauty of these missiles. No, it wasn’t a group.
It was a horde.
Absolutely Majestic.
The being that caused all this—no, God that caused all of this, sat in her little reinforced bunker, eating popcorn, while a camera located hundreds of kilometres up, recorded the missiles streaking through the atmosphere.
Nobody saw it coming.
“Princess Celestia!”
The ruler in Question rotated her head to the guard that rudely called for her, “Yes?” She rose an eyebrow, blinding looking away from her Hearth's Warming pudding, “What is i—?”
She was interrupted, “Something is heading for us!” The guard’s eye splinted in random directions, “For Canterlot!”
Celestia rolled her eyes, whatever it is, the guard is most likely overreacting, “What is it?”
“Were not sure!” The mare uneasily replied, “But it’s certainly not something good, a division has already been sent to deal with it.”
“Mmmmmhmmmmm,” The alicorn pursed her lips, “Where is it?”
The guard simply pointed to the balcony.
Celestial questionably rose an eyebrow, and walked to the place in question. Only to gaze up at the shy with uncertainty and disdain.
“What the fuck….” She mumbled.
A ridiculously thick cloud of expanding smoke streaked through the sky above, the unnatural substance stained the sky like a knife to tissue. What was even more confusing was the creature—or object, responsible for this whole mess. Was quite far away, to describe it was almost impossible.
But one thing remained as certain; it was directly heading for them.
‘Could it be a dragon?’ She wondered, despite it clearly not being a dragon in any way shape or form, this little thought process seemed to calm her down significantly.
It was at this point Celestia could actually hear it. It was like nothing she’d ever heard before, the closet thing she could describe it to would be a constant, low pitched shriek.
It was uncomfortable.
And unfortunately, it was getting louder.
Little spots in the distance, no doubt a group of pegasi, were attempting to catch up with the contraption, but it was just too darn fast, none of them could keep up with it. Even unicorns being held by them failed to retain accurate magic shots, those that did land, simply just bounced off, without even so much as a dint in it.
Now that it was much closer, so close in fact it was just a few hundred meters above Canterlot, Celestia could retain a much better look at the object, a strange metal cylinder, painted with an uneven layer of greens and reds? Weird. And what the heck is that on the side of it?
What the heck is ‘Merry Christma—?’
All she saw was white.
What is that?
Twilight Sparkle, in Ponyville turned her head towards the overwhelmingly bright light. A massive ball of extreme yellow radiation consumed the entirety of her vision, so bright, that to avoid any further focal damage, she closed her eyes, and held a hoof over for extra protection.
Twilight wished she didn’t open them.
A huge yellow and brown ball rose was what was left of the Canterlot Mountain, it slowly rose into the air, forming a mushroom-like shape, and several rings continued to slowly expand around it. Fire seemed to continue to spread over the surrounding landscape, absorbing anything, and everything in its path.
Rocks were melted, trees were consumed, ponies were evaporated.
And then, something happened.
An absolutely powerful shockwave mowed over the entry of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle was hurled up, high into the air. Trees were pulled from their roots, and houses were flattened. It was like a giant stomped on the small village, and continued it's steamrolling rampage outwards.
Twilight heard hundreds of screams.
The purple unicorn soon toppled onto the ground, the last scenery she witnessed was deceased corpses surrounding her before she fell unconscious.
It didn’t take long for the fire to consume her as well.
President Senatus gazed at the throne in-front of him, with dreamless hunger. He had been waiting for this moment for a very long time. All the struggles he had gone through to get to this very moment, was all worth it.
The battles.
The war.
The campaigns….
With the war finally over, and the Empire in complete ruins, all there was left was just a small amount of unorganised militia armies, which would be stamped out with relative ease.
For he would become the next king of the Reformed Griffon Federation! He would bring all of griffon kind to new glory and honour!
But first, he had to claim his rightful place on the throne
By sitting on it.
As the President solely marched over to the golden encased seat—with purposeful steps— he noticed something in far distance, in the corner of his eye, through the window. A white, blinding flash. He had to close his eyes a couple of seconds just to reorient himself.
To investigate further, he strutted over to the glass pane and gazed outside towards Equestria. Despite being located hundreds of kilometres away, he saw a giant yellow/grey mushroom rise in the distance.
He decided to mumble his thoughts, “What the fuck?”
Only to swiftly rotate his head in another direction to witness another blinding flash, and another, and another, and…. All of these seemed to have derived from strange, green/red objects in the distance, plumes of thick grey gas emanated from behind.
There was just so many of them.
“Is it God?” he questioned, “Has heaven finally defended down to our planet?”
His eyes shot open in fear as a sudden thought came to him, “...or is it the final judgement ...?”
An abnormal buzzing sound originating from somewhere above the palace, kicked the mentioned President from his self-questioning slumber, and into the world of precedence terror.
He can put two and two together.
A never heard before the sound, that came from above, which just happened to be the exact same location where those red/green cylinders originated from.
As it turns out, the Reformed Griffon Federation will never have its desired glory.
All he saw was white.
United Zebra Soviets
A great gathering of Zebras of all kind, stood unwavering, in perfectly straight lines, heads held high, and attitudes of extreme patriotism. Their glorious red flag dotted around the surroundings, large, and flapping unceremoniously in the wind.
Then, the glorious national anthem began.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U06jlgpMtQs
Instruments rocketed, voices rejoiced, hearts soared.
It was absolutely amazing. The atmosphere was exhilarating. Just, one massive voice, all acting together, for the benefit of themselves, and the nation. The entire thing literally ‘screamed’ respect, and joy of the prospect of their nation.
But there was something that made it better.
For every sudden increase in volume within the song, far into the distance, a great flash of white light, and resulting explosion rose up into the air similar to the appliance of a mushroom.
Despite this, and the players’ hesitation, the song continued to be strum.
It just made the whole situation appeal more majestic.
Each consequent detonation acted similar to a sudden drum beat, enhancing, and framing the song with even more vigour. Many believed this was an act of God. That God, blessed their nation into great prosperity into the future.
The great fumes of gas zig-zagged across the entire sky, manufacturing a pattern not unlike a woven fabric, it was as though each and every line was placed there with precision, and determination, with many dipping down at specific intervals down towards the surface.
No-one noticed one plunge down towards them.
Just as the national song came to a close, something occurred, to have one, final, impact.
The instruments all suddenly rose in pitch and volume, echoing their majestic sounds throughout the surroundings, and finished off with a bam.
And so did a thermonuclear explosion, right at their very location.
All they saw was white.
Now this, is entertainment.
I should do this more often.
What will be even more fun is fucking with the remaining survivors.
A few weeks later…
Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was terrified.
Not just because of the millions upon millions of deaths that suddenly occurred within just a few minutes, no. Instead, she is the only remaining Alicorn in all of Equestria, and beyond. All royal duties, including the continued protection of all Equestrian citizens, had been unintentionally passed onto her.
Cadence silently wished she hadn’t traveled to the Minotaur Domain, and instead, just died with the rest of her Aunties.
With the entire world in ruins, there’s no way she’ll be able to recreate the entire Equestrian Kingdom. In fact, as of now, they’ve only recovered around 3000 ponies. Something that the last Alicorn silently dreaded considering that it’s not even 0.5% of the previous population.
Their ‘capital’ had to be moved to a less ‘affected’ area, where the ground wasn’t as scorched, and still reasonably fertile, to the south-east of Equestria. This, however, incorporated many concerns as they were located next to the ‘previous’ Griffon border.
With raids occurring on a weekly basis, it becomes exceptionally difficult to defend against repeated attacks, especially if those ‘muskets’ were utilised as well.
But with an unknown sickness transversing throughout the majority of her population, it’s arguable that her unstable government may topple before she’d even had her chance to create a safe, and secure society.
And ultimately, prove herself.
But that’s not going to happen.
Several Months Later……
Deep in the northern sector of the planet, lied a certain, barren region. Which used to consist of nothing but snow, and frostbite winds. Now, however, after the nuclear detonations, only ash, blacked stone, and a reasonably warm climate remained.
Suddenly, there was a sudden build up of dark energy resonance, the air itself seemed to rip, and pull against itself. Until, finally, a mc-massive flash and dominating rumble shook the area.
Once the light cleared, what remained put most in utter speechlessness.
A whole city, seemingly made of crystal.
Another being appeared seemingly alongside it, a black, tar, smoking creature of dark origin. His terrifying grin of utter pleasant would put all but one into petrification.
This frightful appearance, unexpectedly, dissipated once the being in question realised the state of the surroundings.
There’s no way he’ll be able to create a salve ridden nation in this environment.
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Get rekt sombra
Thanks for this amazing chapter! But what about Aryanne?
10003620
Too close to greater Equestria. Also, poor Sombra. All he wanted was for his city of slaves to reign over the frozen north, but the north is no longer a) frozen, and b) fit for life.
Yeah your not going have a fun time when you have nuke coming right at you
You sneaky cunt didnt even send it to me thats Some good sneaky shit 10/10
What the hell is this really happened a Nike drop on equestria?
Also more please if this really happened
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSaTBxJweCc_h8aFtiMZOSz4V_cWzZoToawCAVn2xc4xpNkRqwAxy3KtoRZ&s
Thanks for the gift...MERRY CHRISTMAS!
10003822
It's non-canon, that means it's not apart of the story and didn't really happen.
Then, 200 years later, a mare walks out from the underground in search of her love, and the only words she says are,”What the fuck happened here...?”
10003620
The same fate.
10004392
Oh ok thanks i just hope is Canon and want celestia to death already
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_MBgz9h7GGM
A present for the manager
Atomic just gave them the "Hippity Hoppity get off my property"
10017729
I apologise for this. I will admit that I tend to waffle on unimportant topics and stray farther away from the main character as I would like, (like that battle) and honestly, it's getting more and more boring to write. I find that anything that involved Atomic, and her chaotic nature, was much more entertaining to produce.
Though it's difficult to focus on her as I'm still attempting to 'set the scene' for a unique event that's going to occur in the future.
I promise future chapters will involve much more of Atomic.
Eventually, it's pretty much only going to feature her.
10019095
Great! Im glad to hear it. I honestly hope that battle wasnt to important to the main story because i dont think i could find it in me to read it. Either way im glad that we will be seeing more of atomic.
Also, i think you should commission atomic with her necklace of eyeballs and covered in blood and gore with the maniacal eyes and post it. It would be just awesome. I mean im not that big into gore and stuff but i think it would be awesome.
When is next chapter?
10019178
Within the next week.
Ha, get shreked, noobs.