Prince of Errors

by David Silver

8 - To Die For

The prince hadn't returned that night. He had a surplus of bits, so he opted for a nice room in a local spot. Calling it a hotel would have been generous. Like a motel? Without any cars present. It was still nice. It even included breakfast, so he was satisfied.

It also had a pool he intended to try in the morning. When he roused and started for it, he found Pinkie already floating along, grinning at him from atop an inflated Luna toy. "Mornin'!"

He rolled his eyes with a soft smirk. "Should I ask where you got that?" He pointed at the toy.

"What? This thing?" She hugged it around its goose-like neck. "I've had this forever. And youuuu have something special too, a date!"

He blinked at that. "A date?" He leaned forward a bit. "I don't do blind dates. Nothing but misery lay in that direction."

Pinkie snorted at that, floating towards him despite any obvious effort on her part to move her craft. "Rarity just wants to meet you, again. This time you don't have to take pictures of her, or pretend to be a pony. She wants to meet you." She thrust a hoof at the prince for emphasis. "All you have to do is be yourself."

"She'll forget I'm there the moment I stop talking." He rubbed at his cheek lightly with a hoof. While Pinkie, and that human, seemed to be exceptions, he doubted Rarity would be the same.

"Give her a chance!" She sprang free of the pool toy, landing next to him athletically. "What's the harm? Worst case, she wanders back to making her dresses. It's what she does. Nopony gets hurt."

Except maybe his feelings. He shook his head, banishing that thought. "I'll do it, just to prove the point." He touched her nose with a hoof. "Just because you can, doesn't mean anyone else can, alright?"

"Alright!" She cried in a much more enthusiastic tone than he had used. "She's at her boutique. You ready?"

He glanced towards the pool. It would still be there... "Let's get this over with." He walked around Pinkie and started for the boutique. He knew where it was, having been there just two days prior. "So, uh, no cake duties today?"

"Plenty," refuted Pinkie with a smile. "But they can wait until after I get you two together." She poked him in the side with the same freedom he had with poking her. "You are a friend in need, like I said, so you get some time. I can do the chores afterwards."

The faintest smile touched his lips. It was kinda nice to have someone actively caring about him, even if they were a spazzy pink menace that saw beyond what men were meant to know on a regular basis. "Maybe you'll be right." His tone didn't imply a great deal of confidence, but... maybe?

They arrived side-by-side in front of the boutique. Pinkie pronked forward and clip-clopped on the door. "We're here!"

"Is that you, Pinkie?" came a melodic voice from within. "Did you say 'we?' Come in, dear."

Pinkie reached for the door's handle despite a lack of fingers, opening it effortlessly. "I brought him with me."

Rarity looked over from where she had been eyeing a dress. "Him? Him who?"

The prince huffed softly, what little hope he had sinking.

"The prince!" She gestured broadly at him as he came in after her. "Ta daaaa!"

Rarity looked past her hoof as if she had to follow it to find the alicorn that wasn't even trying to hide. "Oh, there he is. Pardon me." She moved away from her dress to approach. "My my my. What an interesting color scheme for a pegasus. Do you have something to do with controlling inclement weather?"

Before he could reply, Pinkie reached up and started poking at his horn. "Prince," she repeated with a grin that was too wide to be comfortable.

Rarity's eyes drifted upwards, staring a moment before it seemed to click. "Oh! How silly of me, you're a unicorn." She tittered softly. "And a prince she says? Mmm, forgive me for asking, but are you related to Blueblood?"

"No!" That he got out quickly enough. "Who'd want to be?"

She let out a breath of relief. "Oh, thank goodness. Well, welcome to my boutique." She gestured around, waving at her many ponyquins and their dresses on display. "You seem to be missing proper attire. I'd be glad to assist with that."

Pinkie grunted as she crashed to her haunches. "Rarity..."

"Yes, Pinkie?" She turned to look at Pinkie, forgetting about the prince quite easily.

She reached and grabbed one of his wings, unfurling it upwards towards his horn so the two were right beside one another. "He's not a unicorn and he's not a pegasus, because he's an alicorn."

Rarity blinked at where wing touched against horn. Her mouth worked silently as her brain struggled to process the elusive information. "He has a horn, and wings. He's a little small for an alicorn, but he has... Oh. Well..." She frowned a little, her mind trying to toss out this forbidden knowledge. "Well... Would you like to get some clothing dear?" She smiled at him brightly. "Someone of your station shouldn't be prancing about unclothed. Simply unsuitable."

The prince shook his head. "She can't see it, and she forgets like the rest, Pinkie. I mean, nice try, I guess." He dipped his head at Rarity. "It was nice meeting you."

"A pleasure, Dear." She smiled brightly at him. "You simply must come by again." She turned to Pinkie, casually censoring the prince's existence from her senses. "When are you going to bring by that prince you were speaking of?"

Pinkie's jaw fell open. To see it work that quickly and that thoroughly was a wonder. A terrible and horrible wonder that made her shiver a little. "Oh... sometime soon." She laughed nervously and started for the door. "I'll... let you get back to work."

"Of course. You take care, Pinkie." She waved gently and warmly as Pinkie fled, the prince following after her.

As soon as she got outside, she ducked around the corner and pulled the prince in beside her. "That was nuts!"

"Welcome to my world," he sighed out. "At least you can see me."

"You live like this?!" She bounced in place, eyes wide. "This is horrible! You need, like, so much help!" She threw her forehooves wide. "I'd go crazy if ponies just..." She shivered again just from imagining being in the prince's hooves. "That was worse than you made it sound like."

He put a hoof on her shoulder lightly. "Hey, thanks for trying at least. That's something."

"No! No no no! You're planning to try and leave again, aren't you?" She hopped in front of him, blocking the way with her pink form.

His brows fell. "Last I checked, I am an adult capable of making decisions. You can't keep trying to make mine for me. If I want to leave, you should respect that."

Pinkie sat and put a forehoof on either of his shoulders. "Please! You need help, and I'm the only pony that can even try!" She drew her hooves back hesitantly. "I mean... you're right... If you want to go... But, I mean, c'mon!" She danced in place, bouncing from hoof to hoof. "Is that what you really want?"

He looked away from her. There were ponies wandering past them, back on the street. None of them even glanced their way. But there was Pinkie. She was watching him. All of her attention was on him. He was her entire world, at least for a little while... "Alright."

"Alright?" She tilted her head. "Is that a good alright or a bad alright?"

He raised a hoof and gently bopped her on the head. "I'll stay..." It was... nice, if awkward, to have a pony that seemed to really care. "So what's your next big plan?"

"Can we try Twilight now?" She smiled hopefully. "With all of her crazy magic and tons of books, she might be able to help."

He tapped his hooves together. "One, she'll probably have the same trouble Rarity did." He tapped them with a soft clop. "Two, if she doesn't, she'll probably think I'm super interesting and get distracted just trying to figure out how I work, rather than fixing it."

Pinkie sank to her haunches, tapping her chin with a forehoof. "Well, hmm... I'd better get back to Sugarcube, but we'll try more later, promise. Thank you for staying! Oh, want another job?" She smiled brightly. "I have one that'd be perfect for you, but I won't say it if you don't want it."

"What'll make me like it so much?" He rolled a hoof for her to explain, one brow raised.

"If you're anything like the humans I know, you like being around Twilight and her friends. I mean, sure, you're avoiding Twilight, but you've been alright with me and Rarity so far. This one'll have you close to us. Super close!"

He blinked slowly, wondering what it could be. Would he be replacing one of the Mane Six? If one of them was missing, he really should help. It could mean the fate of Equestria! Maybe? He'd never replaced a foreground pony before... Was that possible?

Only one way to find out. "Alright, what's the job?"

"Apple Bloom fell down a hole," started Pinkie. "She was playing with that other human and they got into trouble. She's fine, promise, but while she's laid up, Applejack is down an assistant, and ponies will ask questions. I mighta mentioned to her that I knew a way to maybe fix that, so if you could take her place for a little while..."

As she spoke, he could feel rushing waves of power tingle through his altering body. The world grew larger and larger around him as he became a little filly. He felt a ribbon pop into being in his bright red mane. Pinkie seemed so much bigger then. "Oh," he said with a young Southern accent. "Ah never replaced a foal before." He twisted around to look back at himself, shaking his little filly bottom. "Huh..."

Pinkie bounced in place with a joyful smile. "You look perfect! Aw!" She grabbed the prince by his smaller cheeks, rubbing them gently. "Now you go out there and, uh, be Apple Bloom. Have fun with it! She's a fun filly and gets up to things, so don't worry too much."

She bounced off, leaving him to his new filly identity. "Huh..." he repeated, still a little stunned at how things felt as he circled in place before daring to venture towards the street. Even his gait was off, ambling along in the way that foals did instead of the trot he was more accustomed to. "Well, nothin' fer it." It was uncanny how his accent could shift to fit a role, but it helped avoid awkward questions, so he didn't complain.

"Ah hope she's alright." Pinkie had mentioned Apple Bloom was doing alright, but if she fell down a hole hard enough to need a replacement, that couldn't have been fun. Still, Pinkie had said she would be fine...

"Apple Bloom!" came an excited cry. The prince barely had time to look up in time to see Scootaloo heading towards her at an uncomfortable speed on her scooter, her little wings fluttering wildly for speed. She kicked back, her scooter jumping and coming down facing sideways, bringing her to a screeching halt just a preciously small gap from crashing into the prince. "You're already better?! Wow! They weren't kidding when they said earth ponies are tough! Guess we don't have to explain to Applejack what happened then, huh? Phew!"

He was surprised. He didn't think he had formally entered his role yet, but maybe just being Apple Bloom in vision of Scootaloo counted? "Ahm alright." He tapped at his little chest, smiling at his temporary friend. "Where's Sweetie hidin' at?"

Author's Note:

Welcome to the next assignment. Cutie Mark Dopplegangers, go! Wait, is that a typo?

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Comments

[Emtu]

Cutie Mark Dopplegangers

Dear Celestia, don't give them any ideas.

[SolangeEggbert]

It's like he is just a Background Pony. :)

[badninja]

Well this is going to end well. I wonder what Apple Bloom, Applejack, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo are going to think of this? I doubt that many ponies are going to like just what our prince can do.

[FanOfMostEverything]

It is eerie seeing the prince's powers in action.

Twilight trying to figure out how the prince works doesn't seem like too bad an idea. Understanding the underlying magic could lead to a way to unravel the worst parts of it. Still, I can understand his reluctance. If he manages to stick Twilight's mind as nothing more than "intriguing magical anomaly," it could get pretty darn uncomfortable...

He'd never replaced a foreground pony before... Was that possible?

What, Pinkie doesn't count?

Also, the Prince as Apple Bloom... brace for tree sap, everyone.

And this may or may not be a typo. I'll need you to open this box and see if the cat's alive:

So, uh, no cake duties today?"

If he's talking about Pinkie's bosses, that should be capitalized.

[David Silver]

9259747
This is true, Pinkie was a thing, but it was also very new. He went from 0 to like a gajillion foreground ponies! 2 is like a gajillion compared to 0, alright?

That would-be typo is pretty perfect as it is, working in both manners without flinching.

Surely he will avoid the sap. Maybe.

[Vaalintine]

So Pinkie starts caring... and then stops. Why care when you could force them to do what you want? I'm really hoping someone smacks her for being a little shit.

[tsaukpaetra]

And there's the drop. But hey, at least this Background Pony has someone persisting in knowing of his existence.

[Emperor]

Considering how Pinkie seems to ignore her own reality-bending powers and the Fourth Wall, I wonder if after a while she'll ignore this existentialist cosmic horror phenomenon to retain her sanity. Poor, poor protagonist.

[Luckyfanisaac]

"You live like this?!" She bounced in place, eyes wide.

As she spoke, he could feel rushing waves of power tingle through his altering body. The world grew larger and larger around him as he became a little filly. He felt a ribbon pop into being in his bright red mane. Pinkie seemed so much bigger then. "Oh," he said with a young Southern accent. "Ah never replaced a foal before." He twisted around to look back at himself, shaking his little filly bottom. "Huh..."

Awwwwwwwwwww!!! So cute!!!

[David Silver]

9931892
Fixed!