• Member Since 8th Feb, 2012

Cactuarz


>.> Half Trixie, half Pinkie Pie, dash of Twilight Sparkle

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Found 93 stories in 108ms

Total Words: 19,782,268
Estimated Reading: 7 weeks

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I was living a comfortable life. Had a loving wife and son, money was absolutely no issue, everything was swell.

Next thing I know, I'm hearing voices, I can't move, I can't talk, I can't even breathe. Yet, I know I'm alive, though I don't entirely feel like myself anymore.

Then I end up being the last of survivor of my new race.

I'm not even human anymore...

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-A HiE fic as a changeling in an alternate universe where MLP was never aired on Earth.
-Starts shortly before the end of Season 2.
***Slow updates! You've been warned!***
-Current cover image is a placeholder. Trying to find a more appropriate one...
-Comments below contain spoilers!
-The [Tragedy] tag is there mainly because I can't put up the [Sad] tag, due to conflicts with the [Comedy] tag.

Chapters (18)
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* Voted Twice as the #1 Comedy FanFic on Equestria Daily *

Well, what can I say? This is the story of a man. Or maybe he was... a pony-man. Or maybe he was just a... Pony! But he was still...

FIREWAAAAAAAALLLL!!!!

... Yeah, this is that story. The story where a guy goes to a party and wakes up in Ponyville. That guy (I know him as 'me') seems to have landed in his own personal little heaven. Hell, I even brought me a pack of endless cigarettes. How does that not kick all kinds of flank?

So yeah, everything was awesome. The End.

Well, except for The Nightmare. And Trixie. And some jerk named David. Then there was that Azure Flora pony. And that skank princess that steals my goddamn phone!

Listen, summaries just... They just don't cut it. If you want the story, it's provided right here.

Just a warning. I use cusswords like a big boy.

ALSO LUNA IS NOTHING BUT A GODDAMN TROLL!

Chapters (13)
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What would you do if a pony moved into the apartment upstairs? Would you make an effort to meet her? What would you talk about? And what kind of pony leaves Equestria for Earth in the first place?

This is a series of slice-of-life episodes about a young man who meets a pony in New Jersey. Equestria has made contact with Earth; creations and creators have been sorting things out for a couple of years, and a smattering of ponies are gradually starting to move to Earth. Told though human eyes, here's the story of one of them.

Chapters (25)
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When the ad for a roommate was answered by a pony, Louis was more than a bit surprised. He had heard about them in the news, and how they had come from another world. But what Bronies had wished for wasn't exactly what they found. Now the real ponies are visiting earth, and he has one living with him. How will the straight laced normal guy learn to deal with a hyperactive pink pony, and how will she learn to live in a world without magic?

A bit of a sitcom style slice of life, where the real ponies are as different from the show as we are from cartoon humans. Rated PG13 for innuendo and language. Expect foul language, F-bombs, sexual innuendos, and tons of low-brow dirty humor.
Featured! 2/7/14
Room for Rent: FAQ
Edited by Zyrian

Chapters (14)
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After escaping the Changeling gladiator arena at the cost of a friend's life, Equestria's lone human is attacked and befriended by Twilight Sparkle. This begins a long, strange, and confusing adventure to return home, and discover why he even arrived.

Complete, and edited twice... but If you see something I missed, I'd greatly appreciate it if you'd leave a comment.

Cover art made in Blender.

Chapters (74)
T
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After an existential journey goes wrong, a man finds himself in Equestria. With no way to return home he has no choice but to find a path in a new body. Will he discover a place to belong once again in this new land, or be forced to carve one out?

Currently rewriting first eight chapters and editing the rest of the story. Plot will be fundamentally the same, just the quality will significantly increase. There will be some story and character changes.

As of right now the story ramps in quality with some bumps due to edits.

Chapters (43)
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I used to be a human, but then I pissed off a wizard. Now I'm stuck in "Ponyville", in a land called "Equestria", and with no apparent way back home. I'm also pretty sure that I've just replaced somepony. I'd rather not have to answer any tricky questions, so I'm better off trying to be this unicorn whose name has been forced onto me.

My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm not a pony.

[Rated Teen for extensive use of vulgar language and sexual references.]

[Cover art made by richhap on deviant art. Unamused Twilight, go figure.]

[Brybrythesciguy is working on a cool audiobook of this story right HERE. The characters' voices are even simulated with an AI! I definitely recommend giving it a listen!]

Chapters (50)
T

This story is a sequel to Stardust


Times are changing for Equestria as Twilight’s return brings with it news of people and cultures from beyond the peaceful world everypony knows. Aid and volunteers are freely offered to help the besieged humans of Earth because every Equestrian knows that’s what good friends do. Unfortunately, making friends can also have the unintended consequence of making enemies.

When the monsters besieging the humans strike at Equestria with a level of brutality not seen in over a thousand years, the cry for help is sent to all the kingdoms of the world. Honored allies step forth to fulfill ancient treaties and oaths. Enemies, old and new, bury their grievances. An alliance never before seen in Equestria will be created to combat the monsters from the void.

And because of these events, a grim but welcome sibling to the XCOM project is born.

(XCOM/FiM Crossover)
(Sequel to Stardust, which I recommend reading before starting this. Fortitude Amicitia and Broken aren't required reading but are supplemental to the storyline)
(Gore tag for blood and violence)
(Alternate Universe tag because of the divergence from canon that Stardust has caused)
(Uses elements of Season 4)
(Coverart produced by the amazing Carnelian!)
(Many thanks to Arzoo, BradTheBrony, Vandenbz and Setokaiva for prereading!)
(As of 03/07/2016, the prereading team consists of Arzoo, BradTheBrony, Noble Cause and Metallusionsismagic!)
(Complete with it's own TVTropes page as part of the Stardust continuity. Could use some updating!)
(Character tags will be added as chapters are added!)
(Featured 5/12/2014! Thanks folks!)
(Possible spoilers in the comments! BEWARE!)

Chapters (44)
T

Isolated from her friends and taken prisoner in the middle of a war, Twilight must deal with the very real dangers of being percieved as an enemy as well as the nightmares of her arrival on 'Earth'. Can she overcome her own fears and the fears of her captors? Will the wayward unicorn's assistance be a boon or a curse to the 'humans?' Most importantly, will she ever find her way home?

"In short, it's a story of friendship and plasma rifles, with the emphasis on the friendship. The characters are well written, the XCOM setting is fleshed out very well, and the story is compelling. If you love XCOM, you'll love the story, but even if you've never heard of it, it's more than worth giving the first 3 chapters a read.

There's excellent action later on, but the real strength lies in the collision between the friendly and naive world of Twilight Sparkle and the desperate world of humans fighting a losing war for survival and willing to do anything to turn the tide."

--Arzoo

(XCOM/FiM crossover)
(Cover art commissioned by a friend and created by the magnificent FoxInShadow!)
(Original cover art by the amazing Carnelian can be viewed here!)
(Gore tag for blood and some violence)
(Many thanks to the studius OminousTen, Arzoo, xXFluttershyForeverXx and finally Setokaiva for giving my rambles a once-over)
(Now with it's own TV Tropes page! Get to tropin' folks!)

Chapters (36)
T
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Long Path, an earth pony living in Canterlot, and his best friend, a griffon named Free Agent, set out in the company of Twilight Sparkle to visit various places and species to look into what makes them different, and hopefully learn how to get along with them better. Things rarely go to plan though, and along the way, they discover things about themselves, and find love, drama, and laughter. Then Chrysalis changes everything, and the fate of the whole world might be at stake. Their lives will never be the same!

This story is set mostly after the events of Conversations in a Canterlot Cafe and builds on the fanon of the series, especially changelings, so you might want to read those stories first for background material.

Chapters (20)