//------------------------------// // Girl Problems in a Storm // Story: My Twilight Facade // by axelsempai //------------------------------// Cue the sound of a thunderclap and cackle with glee, for I have accomplished one of my short term goals! Finally, I've made my first spell! Sure, progress could have been faster if it weren't for me going to the gym every other day, but still! I now knew how to set things on fire with my mind alone! Truly, this was a glorious day to be me! Wait, if I'm making my own spells now, does that make me a wizard? Damn it, magic always finds a way to ruin things! So, I was sulking at the piece of parchment that I had with my list of available spells written on it. So far, three spells, one of which I hadn't completely memorized yet. None of them were what I personally needed, and they were nowhere near as powerful as the spells I would eventually need to cast. How long was I here now? Six weeks? I was getting nowhere fast. "Are you okay, Twilight?" Spike's voice nearly startled me, but I calmed myself and smiled at him. "Yeah, I'm fine. It's just that I'm getting a little frustrated with a personal project of mine." "Do you need any help?" While I would like some help, Spike knew Twilight's spellcrafting prowess too well, so I shook my head. "I can handle it." I noticed that Spike had a scroll in his hand. "What's that? Something I need to see?" Spike puffed himself up, as if he was gathering courage for something. "It's a letter from Princess Celestia. She wants me in Canterlot for royal business." He said a little too confidently. Let's think about this for a minute. While I was sulking earlier, I wasn't dead to the world. If Spike belched out a scroll, I would have heard that. Believe me, it's a loud process. On another point, why would the princess specifically want Spike's help? And finally, it seems a little too conveniently timed, as there was going to be a comic book convention in Canterlot tomorrow. I looked over the scroll he gave me, and it said that he would be needed until the end of the day tomorrow. Yes, very convenient. "Huh, I guess you really do have royal business." I said. I smirked tauntingly at Spike. "Though is it for Princess Celestia of Canterlot, or with Queen Ruby from Ultra Pony Force?" Spike gulped nervously. "C-Celestia, of course." I laughed. "Sure. You have fun on 'business', you pro." Spike smiled, though he looked quite relieved to me. "Thanks Twilight. I'll see you later!" We waved goodbye. Ha! Like I care if he's going to a convention. Whatever, I have the whole house to myself. As soon as the library closes, I'm gonna pick up some of my old living habits. It's been a while since I've slept naked on the couch. Wait, I've been naked for the past month and a half. Damn it, never mind! I'll just settle with eating ice cream directly from the tub. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I spent the rest of the day looking for another spell I should practice, and I found an interesting one. Since I figured it was time for me to learn a utility spell rather than a combat spell, I flipped through a book on abjurations. The spell that caught my attention was a Lock spell. It was a spell that forced the door to lock itself, complete with a counterspell sequence to basically make it a universal lock and key. Sounds useful. While writing the sequences down on the scroll, I was startled by a loud thunder strike. I looked outside to see the clear sunny day was replaced by a sudden storm. I had no idea when that happened, but what else could you expect when you're busy? Heh, I pitied those two poor souls scrambling around out in that storm. It would suck to be them. Those poor, unfortunate, familiar ponies. Where have I seen them... Wait, wasn't that Applejack and Rarity? Aw man, what was I doing chuckling at their misfortune? They shouldn't be out and about when there's lightning! I swung open the door and sucked in breath for a shout. "Applejack! Rarity! C'mon, get inside!" I yelled again, and they finally listened, galloping to my side. Applejack skidded to a halt just outside the library. "Wait, should we really be takin' cover in a tree during a thunderstorm?" I looked up the side of the tree. "Yeah, I think we have a lightning rod up there." Rarity only looked more uncertain. "You think? You're not really sure?" I shrugged at them. "I'm taking Spike's word on it. He said there was, I'm not going to argue." They both sighed with relief, and followed me inside. Before Applejack could get past the door, Rarity stopped her with a hoof. "Do be a polite house guest and go wash up, won't you?" She indicated Applejack's muddy hooves, and how messy they would make things. Applejack grumbled, but I stopped her before she could go back outside. "Nah, don't worry about it. Just wipe your hooves on the doormat and come in. I'll clean it later." Applejack smiled smugly at Rarity, who only glared in response. As the two came into the library, I knew that they wouldn't be able to stand being in the same building as each other. "So, how 'bout that storm, huh?" I asked, getting their attention. "When are the pegasi getting around to dealing with it?" Applejack, being the farm mare that she is, knew the weather schedule better than either of us. "Well, that there storm should be all cleared up in the mornin'." Rarity took that information with surprise, and Applejack was shocked when she realized the implications. As shocked as they were, neither of them were as upset as I was. There was no way in hell that I would let them walk home during a thunderstorm, so I had to let them stay here with me for a while. As upsetting as it was that I wasn't able to eat directly from the ice cream tub, that wasn't what really bothered me. No, the real problem was in my friends and how hostile to one another they were. That left me with two options: Play counselor again, or distract them long enough so that there won't be any problems between them. Look, I love my friends and all, but I was starting to get really tired of this counselor stuff. Every week or so for the past month and a half, I've had to put my work off to the side and deal with whatever issues they had. I really needed to get my spellcasting up to par, but that was easier said than done when all of my friends are either wanting to hang out or having some kind of breakdown. Hopefully I can push this confrontation off for a later date, when I'll be more prepared to deal with it. I doubted that I could handle two angry mares who were stuck in close quarters with each other, so I shifted through my mind for any kind of distracting activity to keep them in line. I latched onto a the first idea that came to mind. "So, who wants to play darts? We have a dartboard." I turned and muttered to myself. "For some reason." Applejack raised an eyebrow. "You got darts? Ahm afraid ah don't know how to play." "Don't worry about it." I said dismissively. "I don't know how either. We'll just go by whoever gets closest to the bullseye." Rarity huffed. "That's a crude way of playing darts." Applejack gave her a less-than-well-intentioned sideways look. "Ahm surprised you would know anythin' 'bout darts." Rarity glared back at her. "Well, somepony has to." I contemplated that statement. Was she indirectly insulting me, as well? I think so, but I doubt she meant it. Regardless, I had to get them distracted before a cat-fight started. Wait, what do ponies call them here? Are they still called cat-fights? I'll look that up later, possibly when neither of my friends were getting into one. "Okay, you two wait here for a moment while I get the stuff we need." I raced down to the basement, where all of the weirder things were kept. Remember that trowel I used? It was down there. I grabbed the dartboard and three darts, and ran back upstairs. I was glad that the two hadn't started their fist fight, but they still looked rather upset. They were looking at either side of the room, pointedly not looking at the other. I was having second thoughts about giving them sharp objects to play with, but I already told them we were playing darts. I set the board up and gathered everyone for the game. First, I laid down some ground rules. "First rule of the game: no magic." "Wait, you're banning magic from this game? Whatever for? Surely you could just limit it, instead?" Rarity asked. "Seriously, screw magic. We're doing this right." Rarity adopted a curious, if annoyed, look at my statement. Applejack wasn't about to argue. "Ah got no complaints. Ah don't have magic, anyhow." Rarity huffed. "Of course you wouldn't object. This gives you the advantage." Applejack scoffed as if offended. "Are you callin' me a cheater?" "Okay, I guess that means I'm going first." I declared. I grabbed the yellow dart, and threw it at the board. Shit, it landed on the outer ring! "Ugh, Rarity, you're next." Rarity grabbed the blue dart, and prepped it for a toss. "Say, Twilight? I've been meaning to ask for a while now, but why do you hate magic so much?" She threw the dart. Just my luck, it hit near the center, just a bit removed from the bullseye. "Yeah, come to think of it, ah would have expected a unicorn to love magic, bein' their thing an' all." Applejack threw a read dart, which hit the middle ring. Rarity won this round. I had to admit, it was getting tempting to tell them more about myself if it meant that they would keep from arguing. Hell, Rarity wasn't rubbing her victory in Applejack's face, so this must have been a question they both could agree was important. As I retrieved our darts, I figured that it would be best to tell them a little bit about why I hate magic. I had a bit of a history with it. "Every time magic enters my life, things inevitably get screwed up. I had a perfect life, but then a wizard puched me in the soul, and my life started to suck." I threw the dart a bit more forcefully than I intended, but it still hit the middle ring. "It's been getting better, though." "My word, what did this spellcaster do to you that ruined any enthusiasm you might feel for magic?" Rarity asked with concern. The answer to this question would be tricky. On one hand, it had to be technically true and not reveal my identity, but also had to fit with Twilight's actual history in case Spike ever caught wind of this conversation. I could push the answer off until later when I think of every possibility, but I needed to give them a good answer now to keep them occupied. I mustered up my best thinking. I sighed with as much resignment as I could, just to give this a heavy feeling. "Look, I'm only telling you this because I trust you. You both are my friends, and I think you can handle it without any... harsh words." Of course, this statement meant nothing. I was stalling for time again, but I was also doing this to kind of hint that they were both good people so they would hopefully end their hostilities. Mostly the former, though. As I'd hoped, they both nodded solemnly and gave me the time I needed to come up with something. Then I got my plan, and oh boy, was it a kicker. "The thing is..." I added a pause for dramatic effect, but they didn't know that. I turned to them as solemnly as possible. "...I wasn't always a mare." Applejack and Rarity were dumbfounded by the news. They even glanced at each other, and I noticed that there was no hint of quarreling in their shared glance! Success! Of course, Applejack was the first to ask for clarification. "Beg yer pardon? What do you mean you weren't always a mare?" I put on a nervous smile as a show of false vulnerability. "That wizard used a spell on me back when I was a colt. He turned me into a filly that day, and I've never quite been the same since then." Partly true, as I was a guy at one point. I just overstated how young I was. "Oh my." Rarity held a hoof to her head, possibly feeling light-headed from the revelation. "That is quite the shock. I would certainly understand your hesitance to use magic after such an ordeal." With even Applejack giving me an apologetic look, I had to consciously try to keep my victorious smile hidden. Now that I've built the pressure, I would draw a silver lining. "Now, don't you girls worry about me. This has been kept a secret for a long time; Spike doesn't even know. My parents will deny it, and I doubt Celestia is even aware, but I've gotten accustomed to my body since then. I'm perfectly comfortable the way I am, so please don't treat me any differently. As far as we're concerned, I've been a girl my entire life." For a moment, they were still. They merely stared at me, still absorbing the shock of my announcement. Just when I was thinking I broke them, they smiled with understanding. "Don't you worry, sugarcube, ah'll keep your secret safe." Applejack reassured. "I will do the same for you, darling." Rarity added. "But your story bothers me. Why couldn't you get the spell reversed?" With quick thinking, I made an excuse. "We couldn't find him afterwards, and my parents weren't able to reverse the spell themselves." That much was true, to my credit. "We just figured it was easier to pretend I was always like this." Rarity nodded her understanding. "Alright then. If you don't mind, I shall treat you like any other friend of mine. Is that okay?" I put on a relieved smile and went to hug them both. "Thanks. Both of you." Applejack returned the hug. "Shucks, it ain't nuthin'." "Anytime, darling." After a moment, we released the hug and smiled at one another. Since they were in good spirits now, but much to my vexation, I realized that now was my best chance at getting the two of them to make up. Figures that I would be the counselor, even on my self-imposed day off. With an inward sigh, I did what any good friend should do. "So, are you two done fighting?" They looked at each other and blushed with embarrassment. "Oh yeah, ah forgot about that." Applejack admitted. "What were you arguing about?" I asked. "Oh, it was silly." Rarity dismissed. "I think we were arguing over how we should clean up for the storm." "Fer the record, ah was pullin' the branches off the trees." A tree branch smashed through a window like a javelin, and got stuck. "Fer that exact reason." Applejack said, pointing at the invading branch. I shoved it roughly back outside with my magic, and moved a bookshelf to cover the window. Interesting, my telekinesis was pretty strong if it could move a bookshelf. I would have to test my upper limits later. "Anyway, I hope you two can make up. It's terrible for friends to get angry at each other." "Agreed. It's just that Applejack and I don't really see eye to eye. I must admit, I like to make things a certain way." Rarity confessed. "I see how that could be a problem." "Well, I was making the branches look nice before the storm, but I see that was a bad idea now." Rarity added. "You see? You gotta be practical about things." Applejack said. "Now hold up." I interrupted. "Yes, while I favor practicality, there are times where a softer or prettier approach is better. Don't forget that time you accidentally caused a rabbit stampede because you treated them like any other creature you would wrangle." "Yeah, yer right." She conceded. I resumed speaking to both of them. "Look, we all have our own issues. For instance, we all know what mine are, right?" "Yer a liar?" "You swear a lot." I narrowed my eyes. They were both correct, but... "Actually, I was referring to my rage issues. I tend to explode at things that upset me, so I temper it with apathy. I may not be doing very well, but I'm trying to compensate for my problems. My point is that you two, from what I'm generally observing, have complimentary strengths and weaknesses. One knows very well how to be practical but lacks finesse, while the other is creative and proper, but has trouble with direct problems with direct solutions. You two, working together, would make a perfect team." They looked at each other again with a new perspective. "Ah never thought of it that way." I was glad that they weren't catching on to what was mostly guesswork. I held their shoulders, looking at each of them in turn. "I urge the both of you to embrace your differences. Always give each other a chance, and together, you will overcome anything, and you just might learn something new." I reminded myself that I should write this down later. It will make for a good friendship report. They nodded at me, and turned to each other. Rarity spoke first. "She's right, Applejack. Perhaps we should look past our differences." Applejack nodded her affirmation. "Yeah, why be friends when we could be best friends?" They hugged their agreement. I sat back with a victorious smile. It was good to get my friends back together. They released their hug, and Rarity beamed when she thought of a great idea. "Wait, since we're stuck here anyways, we could have a slumber party!" My good vibes dropped in favor of horror. "Uh, I don't know about that..." "Slumber party, huh? Ah haven't been to one in a long time. Too long, if you ask me." Applejack claimed. Uggggghhhh. Man, I really don't want to be part of a slumber party. I was having a wonderful life without ever being in one, and these two were trying to muck it up. But as I looked between the two hopeful mares, I realized that they were two out of five people in all of existence who could convince me otherwise, so I sighed. "Alright, let's have a slumber party. What do we do in one?" Rarity shot forward with an almost manic grin. "We could talk about boys." I leaned away from Rarity with a look of nervous terror. "Ahhh, I don't know..." "Please? I'm really interested in knowing what your perspective is on romance, considering your background, and all." She insisted. I bit my lip. "Well, I have the perspective and preferences of a boy my age." Rarity levitated a trio of couch cushions over, and lied on one with her head propped up with interest. "Really? So you're really just a rugged stallion in the guise of a beautiful mare?" I stepped back a bit with discomfort, but I slipped on the cushion Rarity placed behind me. I shot back up, to resume my backtracking. "Um, probably? Please don't be coming onto me." Rarity snickered. "Oh, relax darling. I'm only teasing." I forced a nervous laugh. "Okay, I'll be right back with some juice, since I don't have any booze." I retreated to the kitchen, and swung open the refrigerator for the apple juice. I took a quick swig, and immediately felt a bit more relaxed. God, slumber parties were scary. And to think, we were only getting started. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was dedicated to hating this slumber party. After all, I'm a guy. Guys don't like slumber parties. We like sleepovers, where we play video games and set fire to glass. We do not like wearing mud masks and cucumber slices. We shouldn't like wearing mud masks and cucumber slices. This was the exact situation I found myself in, with Rarity and I lying on those cushions, faces covered in green stuff. Applejack accepted the mud mask, but she just ate her cucumber slices, which I didn't know we were allowed to do, therefore she's cheating. I was sulking the whole time the mask was on, but I was getting used to it after a while. Rarity was, of course, talking about romance and gossip. Quite unfortunate for Spike that she was into this "Prince Blueblood" guy, but I'm sure Spike will manage. Applejack, meanwhile, spoke up every once in a while to express her displeasure in a certain story, and I joined in out of courtesy more than anything else. Finally, Rarity got around to washing the mud masks off. When that goop was off my face, I couldn't recall a time when my face felt so refreshed. I ran a hoof over it just to make sure it wasn't because of some other chemical that was stuck, but it was clean. It felt really nice. We had s'mores, which I didn't know was a typical slumber party activity. Rarity made them look real pretty and neatly arranged, and of course Applejack just tossed them into her mouth. It was pretty silly, seeing Rarity's delicate work carelessly chewed up. We got a good chuckle out of it. But then we decided to do my favorite activity thus far: the pillow fight. I don't know how I found so many pillows in my house if there were only two beds, but I brought out every available pillow. It started out crazy, and it ended crazy. Applejack bucked pillows like artillery, Rarity shot them around like cannonballs with magic (I gave her special permission to use it), while I was a skirmisher. I ran around the room to thwack them with a pillow I held in my surprisingly powerful jaw, dodging two sets of propelled ammunition the best I could. It was a harrowing battle, and there were no winners (except for everyone). We were exhausted afterwards, so we adjourned into my room to sleep. Applejack and Rarity shared a guest bed while I slept alone in mine. A burst of lightning struck nearby, awakening everyone. With the same idea in mind, we all ran to the window to see what was hit. The tree next to my house was smouldering from a lightning bolt. "Oh, that fucker's going down." I predicted. To my surprise, Rarity didn't chide me on my language. I guess she was too tired for that. "Not on my watch, it ain't!" Applejack declared, prepping her lasso. I would have asked where she kept it, but it was too late for me to care about such things. Applejack flung open the window, letting the heavy wind and rain whip inside. Undeterred, she twirled her lasso and threw it over the falling treetop. I breathed a sigh of relief, since the tree was no longer in danger of falling and crashing into my neighbor's house. I really wasn't sure if this tree was on my property or not. Then Applejack yanked the tree away, and it fell in our direction. Rarity tried to stop her, but it was too late. I panicked, three dweomer sequences springing to mind. I powered my horn and shot forth a beam of energy. The magenta beam tore through the tree and smashed it into splinters. The remains of the fallen tree dropped to the land below, in a mangled heap. Applejack and Rarity looked at me with surprise, not expecting me to have used anything more than basic levitation. I myself was shocked that using magic came to mind, but looking down at the destruction I caused with a single bolt of energy? That was pretty cool.