//------------------------------// // 22 - Surprises // Story: Gladiator // by Not_A_Hat //------------------------------// "Wait, you’re seriously leaving?" Twilight pulsed her aura, and her whole mess of notes slammed inwards, forming a neat stack. I cocked an eyebrow, impressed despite myself. "Yup. I wasn't joking about moving out." "But...but! I'm close, Wes! I'm nearly there! Human math is crazy cool; with these new tools, I've already resolved the Infinite Stable Loops paradox! I'm re-writing centuries-old axioms in thaumaturgy and science!" "Again." Spike muttered as he re-shelved a book. Twilight continued heedless. "One day soon, I'll have some answers. Give me a little more time, and I'll unlock the secrets of numancy as well!" "Relax, Twilight. It's not like me moving across town is going to...undo your work." I glanced around quickly; I still wasn’t willing to discuss 'soul-bonding' openly. "That would take, like, dimension-hopping. Anyways, you're welcome to visit. I'm not going to stop being your friend because I'm not living in your spare bedroom." I turned back to packing. Twilight dejectedly returned to her calculus proofs and magic research. After I returned her report, she'd dove into math in a big way. I shook my head; she may have begun with my half-remembered knowledge, but she was already far past that and steadily accelerating. Apparently even most of the Canterlot University math department had stopped asking for updates, content to wait for her to slow down so they could award all her prizes at once. I'd confirmed my resolve to move, hopefully to somewhere with a lock, after Pinkie dragged me all over town playing the flugelhorn. I'd gone to the Town Hall to make it happen as soon as I escaped. I'd discovered that land on the edge of the Everfree was available to anyone willing to sign a homestead contract and pay taxes. I'd arranged to lease a small house, really more of a shack but enough to keep me dry and warm, and had it dragged over to my homestead before sundown. All I needed to do was dig an outhouse and a well, buy a bed, stove, and fridge, and I'd be good to go. Hmm...maybe a bit more than I thought. But I could deal for now. It was all remarkably painless, considering what I'd gone through renting apartments back on Earth. I hadn't even been asked for ID. Which was good, because I didn't have any. I'd been a little surprised at how affordable the whole thing was. Not just homesteading the land, which totally blindsided me, but the rent was significantly less than I'd been expecting. After a bit of research, I concluded I was making rather more money than average. My job required continual exposure to one of the most feared and magically active environments in Equestria, and I had next to no serious competition, which meant what I sold went for premium prices. I just hoped that the Everfree wouldn't cause problems in the long run. Getting eaten or enchanted can seriously crimp your life. "Hey, look at the bright side," I said morosely to Twilight. "It seems I've finally gotten into a situation where I can't deny Pinkie her party. She was squeaking something about 'hearths-warming' when she found out I'd gotten my own place." "Oh?" Twilight stacked her notes again. I smirked slightly. Once is impressive, twice is showing off. "Are you really doing a traditional hearths-warming party?" "Maybe. I have no idea what she's organizing. I felt I owed her one after I shouted her down on having a 'Welcome to Equestria' party, so I gave her free reign in this." "Hoo boy." "Heh, well, I think it'll be worth it. But what did she mean about a hearths-warming party? I thought that was just once a year." "Now it is. But used to be a tradition for moving, or big changes in your life. Invite all your friends over, have a party, exchange presents, and start a 'fire of friendship' as the first fire in the new hearth. Everyone brings something to burn, as you move from one chapter of life to another. It can be pretty cool." "Sounds like it." "It's not done traditionally very much anymore, especially with the railway spreading ponies farther than ever. Many new-built towns have everyponies hearths-warming at the same time, instead of a whole series of smaller ones. It’s becoming the norm, and the individual ones happen less and less." "Neat. Anything I should know?" "Um...you'll get lots of presents. Probably food, and some practical stuff. We'll light a fire at the end. If you want to burn something, maybe prepare it beforehand?" "What's the thing about burning mean? Is it something we want to leave behind?" "Oh! No, not really. No, it's more like...if you burn something in the fire, that's supposed to become part of your friendship, and fill the house. Lots of ponies write something out, or cut shapes out of paper." "Huh. Cool." I stood for a minute, scratching my chin. I'd already packed my meager belongings. My stubble was starting to get itchy; I sighed, thinking of trying to trim it with my dagger. Hair and nail growth was one of the few things that hadn't been affected by my soul's entrapment. Splinter conjectured it was because they were already dead, but I'd argued that the spell repaired my clothes, and kept my knife shaving sharp. One more argument I'd never have again. I slid my fingers over my scalp; I'd pulled my hair back and trimmed it into a short queue for a long time, but maybe I could find a razor and barber now that I'd seen quit of those bugs. "Hey, Twilight, any idea where I can get a...mane-cut in this town?" I stumbled slightly, almost saying , but corrected myself at the last moment. Just because Twilight would understand was no reason for sloppy speaking. "Ask Rarity," she mumbled, already re-absorbed in her work. I nodded; that should have been my conclusion, as well. Maybe she'd even find me a razor. "You undercharged me." "Really, dear?" Rarity lowered her sewing and looked innocently over her glasses. I sipped my tea and nodded. "Did you know you have one of the most relaxing houses I've ever been in? Every time I come here, I can't help myself; I end up with 'a spot of tea and a chat.'" I tried to mimic a Canterlot accent. She snorted. I really did value time at Rarity's; she always made me feel welcome, and gave me an oasis of peace in whatever craziness was swirling through town. Unless she was feeling...Ugh, dramatic. Then, things could get bad. "Yes, you seriously undercharged me. The material for my shirts is easily worth three times their price." I ran a finger lightly over the cloth she was sewing; it was significantly rougher than what I wore. "Those weren't scraps; they were premium-quality cotton, the best you had. And they might be work clothes, but there's no way you whipped them out in less than a night." "Pish. I undercharge all my friends." She was doing detail embroidery, using a tiny needle and a horn-held 'thimble' like a tiny steel golf ball. "Not that much! And you hardly knew me!" "Would you have taken charity? You didn't have the money to pay, and if I offered you those for free, what would you have done?" "...refused." "Right." She nodded firmly. "Sometimes ponies need a hoof-out, and sometimes they need a hoof up. Knowing how much you can give, and when giving will hurt the recipient, is part of true generosity. I had three choices: try to give you the clothes for free, charge you full price, or give you a bargain you'd be willing to take." She neatly snipped her thread, and knotted it in a blink. "Two of those choices would have left you walking away with nothing but your foolish pride." She threw a glare across the table. "I wasn't having any of that stupidity, not if I could help it." "Haaaah." I rubbed my eyes; it seemed that the Elements had some of the strangest blind-spots. My hands wandered through my hair again and I remembered why I'd come over, before being distracted by small talk and tea. "Hey, Rarity, you wouldn't happen to know where I could get a decent mane-cut, do you? I need to get this shortened, and maybe buy a razor." I rubbed my chin again. I'd tried growing a beard, but my thin brown facial hair came in scraggly and looked awful no matter what I did. As soon as I said mane-cut, her head snapped around, and her sewing accoutrements sailed back into storage. She folded her glasses and ran a comb through her mane and tail. The sign on the door swung from 'open' to 'closed'. "Um, Rarity? What are you-" "Spaaaaaaaaa~!" "-great." "No. No! Nonononono, the clothes stay on. ON! Back, back!" I ducked behind the counter, weathering hurt stares from the spa ponies. "But sir, you can't go in the sauna like that!" "You...you have a sauna?" I peeked over the countertop. The spa attendants were a matched set, blue and pink mirrors of each other with matching cutie marks, something I'd never seen before. "Wes, what's keeping you?" Rarity stuck her head back through the door. "I just wanted a mane-cuuuuuut!" I wailed quietly. "Rarity, what are you doing to me?" "Oh, come on, Wes. The spa is wonderful! What's the holdup?" "He won't take off his clothes!" Blue-on-pink said in hurt tones. "He yelled about it!" Pink-on-blue added, long-suffering. Rarity glared at me. "Wes, I have no idea why you're being so unreasonable, but surely you don't need to be rude." "Sorry," I mumbled and curled up into a ball, feeling rebellious and put-upon. "It's a human thing. We wear clothes all the time. I'm...shy. Anyways, I only want a trim! Maybe just in the back...really!" "Nonsense, Wes, I invited you to the spa, and I really think you'll enjoy it. Stop being such a foal and give it a try. What happened to the big scary human warrior?" I grimaced. A sauna did sound nice. Wonderful, actually. I hadn't been really clean for...well, a year or so, it seemed. I washed, but I’d gotten out of the habit of bathing. I didn’t really fit pony showers or tubs. And I'd definitely sleep like a rock afterwards. "...and a massage, and a hooficure, and..." Rarity prattled on about the delights of the spa, while I tried to think of a way out of this dilemma. Wait, did she just say massage? At the thought of a massage, I sat up. I was no snob, but I liked to think I could appreciate the finer things in life. And right now, that meant a sauna and a massage. I could almost feel my muscles melt. "Um, do you have a towel?" I asked timidly. "Or maybe a robe?" Blue-on-pink smiled indulgently, and set a neatly-folded garment on the counter above my head. "Of course, sir! You should have asked immediately." "Aaaaaah." I sighed in pleasure, breathing hot steam as I poured another dipper of water on the rocks. I'd appropriated the bucket and shooed the spa ponies out, although they checked on us every few minutes. Fair enough; having a customer faint in the sauna would be bad. I ran my fingers through my hair again, reveling in how neat it was. It felt good. After so long, I hadn’t realized how much the mess bothered me. I could have cut it shorter myself, but it would have looked horrendous. Also, the 'crew-cut' was pretty pointless when none of your opponents have fingers. The spa ponies, Lotus Blossom and Aloe, had been shocked by how short I wanted it. Once convinced, though, they'd gone to work with a will. The massage had also been nice...although hooves couldn't hold a candle to fingers in my book. Now we were in the sauna, and I'd exchanged the robe for a towel tied securely around my waist. "Too bad it's not winter," I said reflectively, relaxing against the warm boards and closing my eyes. "Hmm? How come?" Rarity and I were the only two in the steam bath, and it was deliciously hot. I preferred it hotter and dryer, but I was starting to feel really sweaty, and loving every minute of it. "Well, we used to do this back on Earth. But we would do it in the winter, near a lake. We'd cut a hole in the ice and when we got warm, we'd run outside and jump in the water. It's very shocking, very draining." "I can imagine. I might like to try that." I cracked an eyelid at that; I'd never expected Rarity to be the adventurous sort, but it seemed that she had hidden depths. I shrugged. "You do have fur." My eyes snapped open and I twitched away. Rarity was examining my light body-hair. "Erm, yeah. A bit." I'd never really thought of it as 'fur'. I wasn't even very hairy compared to lots of guys. Whichever relative gave me a scruffy beard had left me patchy all over. "Um, Rarity..." She was staring at me, as if searching for something. "You're making me uncomfortable." "Oh, I'm so sorry. It's just...when you said you were shy, I thought for sure you must have some sort of horrible scar, or something." "Like this?" I smiled wryly and tapped the gem in the center of my chest. It flickered, casting an instant of purple-edged shadows in the cedar scented dimness. "But dear, that hardly counts. You can barely tell there was a cut." I looked down; it was true. A slight star of pinkish skin surrounded it, but the gem had healed me as soon as it was grafted in. The scar seemed years old. "If I didn't know better, I'd think it was jewelry. Anyways, your skin changes color all over." Also true. I had a very uneven tan, starting at a light brownish on my hands, and working inwards to a tender pink. "That's called tanning. The more sun I get, the darker I become." I waved at the lines from a sleeve. "See? My cuffs end here. If I get too much sun, my skin turns really pink and hurts. It's called sunburn. Sometimes it peels." "Fascinating." Rarity really did seem absorbed in the idea of my skin changing color. "So, tell me the truth now; what is it about humans and clothes?" "Um, feels like time to rinse off!" I hopped to me feet. "Eeeep!" I gave a very Fluttershy-like squeal, and stopped dead, grabbing for me towel. Rarity had pinned it down with a hoof, nearly pulling it off me. "Ok, ok, fine." I sat back down, and rubbed sweat out of my eyes. "I'll tell you! But this isn't really a secret. Just sorta embarrassing." I steeled myself. Once Rarity grabbed a hold of an idea, she wasn't one to let go easily. I'd have to tell her eventually, now that her curiosity was piqued. And although she could be a horrible gossip-generous with her words, if you were kind-she wasn't malicious or anything. It would be fine. Probably.   "The part about warmth and protection really is true. If I tried to spend a day in the Everfree naked, I'd be shredded by thorns and sun-burnt to a crisp. Being shy isn't wrong, either; I've worn clothes so long, going without them feels like...well, you might feel the same if you shaved your mane." She gasped slightly, and I knew I'd scored a hit there. "But there's a bit more to it. Since most all humans wear clothes, it's also the very last step in human courtship...taking them off." Her eyes widened, and I saw she understood my meaning. "So you mean...it seemed to you...Aloe, and Lotus?" Her jaw dropped, her pupils dilated, and she waved her hooves vaguely in the air. I nodded miserably. "Oh!" she gasped, collapsing into giggles. "Basically." I deadpanned as she calmed down, sending her off into another fit. The door opened, letting in a draft of chill air; I shot a reproachful glance at blue-on-pink, possibly Aloe. She offered me a tall glass of iced tea as condolences. I took it gratefully and set one by Rarity for when she calmed down. "So," I asked the spa-pony. "Any idea where I could buy a razor?" I strolled calmly down the lane to my new house. It had taken me nearly seven hours to make it here from the library, but I'd spent every minute well. I was clean, and wearing clean clothes. I was shaved. I had a haircut. I thought of the razor tucked into my pocket, and smiled. Things are looking up! I thought, as I opened my new house's new door, planning to unpack and take a good long nap. "SURPRISE!!" “Um...hi.” I stood in front of a crowd of grinning ponies. I smiled weakly. So much for my nap. Apparently the Pink Party Pony had taken advantage of my distraction to accelerate her plans. Unless Rarity had been in cahoots. Somehow, Pinkie had squeezed what seemed like most of the population of Ponyville into my uncomfortably small living room slash kitchen. My eyes swept the room. Colorful streamers hung from the walls and ceiling. Balloons festooned random pieces of furniture. An improbably large cake balanced on my tiny table, and a similarly proportioned pile of presents was heaped to one side. “Ok, he’s here!” Pinkie bounced to the front of the crowd and let off a popper with a bang, confetti fluttering around her head. “Let’s get this party started!” Just like that, the whole confusing scenario broke down into herds, lumps, and clots of milling ponies. I took advantage of the confusion to stow my pack in my bedroom. The party quickly spilled out onto the lawn; my house was about the size of a postage stamp, but it was right on the edge of the town, and there was plenty of green space for mingling. Pinkie flitted through the crowd until I stepped out. As soon as she spotted me, she glued herself to my side and did her absolute best to make sure I was enjoying the party. The cake, presents, games, and even a lot of the decorations, followed us out of the house. It was a beautiful evening, with a clear sky and air still warm from the summer sun. I was spun past a dizzying blur of names and faces, some of which I even remembered. Pony names were a bit easier for me to recall than human ones. The variety of colors really helped. After that, the cake was cut. It was amazing. The standard from Pinkie, I was coming to realize. There were other snacks too, although some of them were a bit...odd, to my palate. Hay fries? What is a hay fry even supposed to be? I filled my stomach regardless. Some of it was great, some was merely OK, but I enjoyed it all. Presents trickled in through the evening. I didn’t get anything really shocking. More food than I could eat, as a start. Most ponies gave me a token for the fire; I got dried flowers, scraps of poetry or well-wishes, bits of wood from odd or significant places, recipes, and even a small bottle of what smelled like alcohol. “This...is fun,” I said, surprising myself. “Of course, silly!” Pinkie laughed, and bounced extra-high next to me. “It’s your party! It wouldn’t be very good if it wasn’t fun!” “No, it’s just…” I paused as we passed the impromptu buffet, and I snagged a glass of...carrot juice? Odd, but tasty. “I didn’t actually expect it to be this much fun. I think I can honestly say that this is one of the nicest parties I’ve ever been to, and probably the best ever thrown for me.” “Really?!” “Really.” I stepped back; Pinkie’s bouncing had increased in speed. “I mean, I’ve never been much for crowds, and meeting new people isn’t exactly what I’d consider a good time, but you’ve really made this enjoyable for me. You literally know everypony, and somehow, it’s always interesting to listen to your introductions. Seriously, thanks for this.” “Aww, you’re welcome!” I flinched as she bounced up and flung her forelegs around my neck. “That’s probably the nicest thanks I’ve ever gotten for a party!” She mumbled in my ear. Just hug the ponies…. I repeated to myself, as I gingerly returned her embrace. Sometimes it helps. “I bet you say that to everypony.” “That doesn’t mean it’s not true! Oh!” She zipped off into the crowd again. She must have seen a newcomer. Sure enough, she returned moments later with a mint-green unicorn who had sun-yellow eyes and a golden...instrument of some sort as a cutie mark. Maybe a harp? She was wearing a black silk top-hat for some reason. “Wes, this is Lyra! She’s a musician and an equuologist, with her friend Bon-Bon! She’s been living here for a few years; she moved here from Canterlot. Lyra, this is Wes, he’s-” I froze, absolutely petrified as chilling waves of menace rolled off Lyra. I’d told Rainbow that I’d been training my fear. That was strictly true. I’d been skeptical when Splinter told me about the idea at first; it sounded like magic, or something from Dragonball. But the technique had proven itself to me many times. He explained that we perceive our surroundings using all our senses, and our brains process things much faster than we realize. Conscious thought, what we focus our attention on, is only part of the data that we are constantly consuming and digesting. I’d discovered through fighting that my feelings and intuition could be shockingly accurate, and so I’d trained myself to heighten them and watch them. That was partly why I twitched whenever someone invaded my personal space; it tended to confuse my finely-tuned instincts. Feeding your fear was double-edged; my high strung intuition could lock me up if I found myself up against something out of my league. Literally, paralyzed with fear. Most wouldn’t think Lyra dangerous, but my senses were screaming at me to freeze, hide, melt into the ground, to be absolutely non-threatening. I’d never had this much killing intent thrown my way before. Not even Sombra had seemed this serious about hurting me. My stare was locked on her golden eyes. I dropped my paper cup. It bounced emptily. I was barely cognizant of Pinkie’s continued introduction. This pony was dangerous. I tried to draw a breath, willing myself calm. My eyes flicked across her. She wasn’t obviously threatening, but...a tendon stood out in that leg. Slowly shifting weight betrayed a readiness to strike. Her breathing was tuned to mine. It was the culmination of a hundred small things. I knew for certain that if I attacked, I’d be crushed. Pinkie gasped somewhere in the distance, as I felt my lips curl back in a savage smile. I winced internally. I’d acted without thinking, but now I couldn’t back down. I prepared for violence and released my own savagery, muscles tensing, weight shifting slowly to the balls of my feet. If I was attacked, I wouldn’t go quietly. Suddenly, Lyra relaxed imperceptibly and the pressure was gone. My stance crumbled as I shook slightly from the rush of adrenaline, but the unicorn in front of me seemed absolutely ordinary and harmless now. She smiled cheekily, and winked at me from under the brim of her top hat. “It’s nice to meet you, Wes! You’re just as talented as I’ve heard; I’m very impressed. I’d like to get to know you more later.” She nodded goodbye, and trotted off. I drew in a shaky breath. Holy crow that was intense. I calmed slowly, bending to pick up my cup and forcing my savagery back. “Wes, are you OK?” I looked up. Rainbow hovered in front of me, her eyes mere inches from my face. I jerked away; her eyes widened as I flowed backwards, falling into a fighting stance for an instant. “Don’t do that!” I snapped, relaxing. “Wow, something really did rattle you.” She floated to the ground, and gave Pinkie a re-assuring wave. “He’ll be fine, Pinks. Let me talk to him for a bit, I’ll get him sorted.” Pinkie nodded, and bounced off into the crowd. “So, Wes, what was that about?” “Um…” I rubbed my chin, realized I didn’t have stubble anymore, and dropped my hand lamely. “What did Pinkie say?” “She said she was introducing you to somepony and you both sorta froze up, then you got, and I quote, ‘super-duper scary looking’. And now I find you raring for a fight? What are you thinking?” “Do...do you know a green unicorn named Lyra?” “Yeah?” “She’s deadly.” “What?” “No, for real! She stared me down, and I locked up. I was absolutely sure she meant to harm me. She’s got something serious going on.” “Hmm.” Rainbow rubbed her forelock absently. “What do you know?” “Not much. I mean, it’s obvious she has some martial training; anyone who knows what to look for could tell you that. But she’s been living here for a few years, and she’s always been sweet and polite to everyone. Never even been in a fight as far as I can tell.” “That’s the thing; she didn’t attack me, either. Just...menaced me, and then said something about me being talented and left. Oh, and she wants to talk later or something.” “Huh. But she didn’t do anything?” “No. Though it would be silly to try anything in this crowd.” “Well, sure. But she’s given up any element of surprise. If she did mean you harm, and is as dangerous as you say-” “She is.” “-then she could have hurt you at any time before this, or after this, and you’d never have stood a chance. You know what I think?” “Yeah?” “I think she was level with you. She was testing you somehow, and honestly wants to talk to you. You’ve mentioned your instincts before. Maybe she has something similar, and wanted to see your response?” “That...hmm.” thinking of that as just a test was slightly scary. I didn’t like being measured so easily. I’d just been stretched to the breaking point. If Lyra could do that casually, she was impressive both in ability and for pulling it off in a crowd while avoiding notice. I shook my head slowly; I was starting to accept Rainbow’s explanation, but I didn’t like it much. Was I really that much of an amateur? I couldn’t hold a candle to Captain Shining, and most of the veteran Guard were above me, but to be so overmatched by...by a random passerby in this tiny little town? I was a little miffed. I’d thought I was doing pretty good, for a non-magical being. On the other hand, I knew from Splinter the extent I’d trained my instincts wasn’t a level a casual fighter could reach. It took years of serious training, or hundreds of life-or-death fights, to reach the point I was at. If Rainbow had been standing next to me she might have felt something, but it wouldn’t have made nearly the impact. Maybe Lyra really did just want to see my reaction and send a message. “She’s lived here for years?” “Yup.” “Sweetness and light to everypony?” “Yup.” “Not a changeling?” “Hah. No, the wards are functioning, or we’d hear the alarms.” “Dang.” I rubbed my eyes. “Fine. I don’t know what her game is, but you’re right. All in all, she didn’t hurt me. No more damage than a nasty prank.” I yawned, stretched, and walked away from the party. The sun had gone down and lanterns had been lit, hung in strings from branches and eaves, leaving the whole gathering a dappling of dim lamplight under the cool moon. I was exhausted; first the spa, and then the party, and now random challenges from unknown combatants. I really needed a nap. “Where are you going?” Rainbow flitted beside me. “I’m going to find a quiet place and take a nap.” “But what about the party? Pinkie?” “It’s my party, I can sleep if I want to,” I smirked, and after a few minutes walk, found a comfy-looking spot under a pine tree in a park. The needles were soft, it smelled nice, and the air was warm. Rainbow turned back as soon as I made my intentions perfectly clear. I pillowed my head on my arms, and gazed up at the stars through the knobbly branches. What a day. I closed my eyes. When I re-opened them, the tree was gone. “Woah.” I sat up, rubbing my eyes. “Oh, I’m dreaming.” I caught a glimpse of movement in the corner of my eye, and turned to find I had a visitor. “Good evening, Your Highness.” Princess Luna flicked a midnight ear in acknowledgement. “Any particular reason for this visit?” “Thou-ahem, you were going to have a nightmare. I thought you might appreciate a little assistance.” “Thank you.” I glanced around, and lay back down. We were in the middle of a grassy field, with a soft, sweet-smelling wind sighing around us. It was night here as well, but the stars were even thicker and more beautiful. “Do you actually rearrange the stars?” I’d been curious since I learned of her domain. “No. Well, it might appear that way.” Although we spoke softly, the quiet air carried our words clearly. “The stars themselves are far beyond my purview. However, on occasion I have bent the light that comes from them, seemingly moving them to another part of the sky. It isn’t something I make a habit of, and it is not permanent. Why?” “Oh, mostly curiosity. Partly, though, somepony mentioned that it might be possible that I was transported from a different planet, instead of a different world. I thought that, if you moved the stars...well, maybe you could say.” “No. Not even I have that sort of power. But, I can not say it is impossible.” “Mmm.” I plucked a stem of grass, and chewed thoughtfully. “No moon here?” “No.” Her voice was quiet, and I left it at that. “Is this your dream?” “Yes. I pulled you from your own, as it started to...deteriorate. Are your dreams getting worse?” “Actually, I think they’re getting better. I should really start journaling them. I bet Twilight would be interested, at least. Hey, I was wondering; your speech is much less formal. Why is that?” “I have been attempting to align my speech with the current mode. It is simple enough, but takes more concentration than seems warranted.” “I know how that goes. I tried learning another language once, and man! Not easy.” We were silent for another minute. “Wes, what are your plans?” I opened my eyes. I’d been enjoying the feeling of complete relaxation. It’s not often you get to dream of watching yourself sleep. “Not sure.” I yawned. “I mean, I don’t have anything specific. I’ve secured a place to stay, and I have something like a job, although it’s not a steady income. I think I can make ends meet. Pinky even threw me a party.” “I know.” Luna’s voice was laced with mirth. “I was given an invitation.” “Oh really?” Heh, Pinkie. "Um...short term, can’t say. Long term…? Well...I’d like to go home.” I stood, stretched, and ran my fingers through my hair. I frowned, and concentrated. It crawled and re-formed itself into my new haircut. Luna smiled at that. “I do like it here, but don’t really think I belong. I know,” I held up a hand to forestall her, “if I wanted to, I’m sure I could make it my home.” I paced back and forth a bit, reveling in the feeling of cool grass on bare feet. “When Princess Celestia first mentioned returning to my world, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I’d never understood that figure of speech. I don’t know if she told you, but I broke down...cried like a baby.” I sighed. “See, I’d given up on it. When the option was...returned, I couldn’t help but grasp at it. Then, I’d have liked nothing more. Now I’ve had time to think...I can’t say I’ve come up with a better answer. But...home.” I stared at the sky, trying to sort my jumbled thoughts. “I used to stargaze back on Earth. Do you mind?” I waved at the sky. She shook her head mutely. I snapped my fingers and the sky flashed, Equestria’s foreign constellations dissolving into the familiar ones of Earth. “Home.” I said again. “Look. There’s the Big Dipper.” I traced it with a finger, and glowing lines illuminated it briefly. “If you follow the last two stars of the cup, you can find Polaris. In my sky, it’s a fixed point, consistent; head towards the Pole Star, and you’re going north.” I studied it for a second, and flopped down on the grass. As I stopped concentrating the sky blurred, thousands of memories of different starscapes smearing the sky into an indecipherable smudge. “Sorry. You can have it back. My feelings are complicated. For now, I’m going to focus on returning...home. I don’t know what it’ll take, but I need a long-term goal. A guide star. My life has changed drastically in the past few weeks. Most has been good. Despite - or because of - that, if I don’t have something to focus on, something to work towards, I feel like I’m drifting.” “I know your feelings, I think.” I glanced at her. Her eyes were downcast, though the constellations had re-formed. “I once felt myself drifting, lost of purpose. It can be distinctly unpleasant.” Her huge eyes locked onto mine. “How are you dealing with...the rest?” “It’s hard to say.” I scratched my head. “The dreams do seem to be receding. I think what we did, cleaning out the nest, gave me a little closure. But I still have hurts, maybe. I was no expert on human mental health even before this.” I shrugged. “I’ve heard of people who’ve had worse problems. I don’t think I’ve ended up with split-personality disorder or anything like that. I don’t know the symptoms or the treatment for post-traumatic stress. I...I think I’m OK? At least for now.” My mind flickered back to the poetry I’d been trying to recall for Twilight. “I’m not afraid of moving forward, though. At least half an experience is what you make of it, and for now I feel strong enough to do my best and work with my friends to make things better. Although life has it’s ups and downs, hope can always be found if you look. There’s a bit of a poem I always liked… 'Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light; I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.' "Sometimes life sucks. But that doesn’t mean we should give up on it.” I sat quiet for a second. “Sorry. I kinda went off on a tangent.” Luna shook her head gently. “Think it nothing. Your sharing is appreciated; even a Princess can use encouragement sometimes.” We rested. The wind sighed. The grass rustled. “Would you…” Luna started slowly, and glanced away when I turned to her. “Would you be willing to show me more of the constellations from...Earth?” She asked quietly. The sky swam, and re-constructed itself into the scene I’d showed her earlier. “Sure.” I pointed upwards, at a sharp vee of stars. “Look, that’s the horns of Taurus, the bull…” I pried my eyes open and sat up. I was a little stiff from sleeping on the ground and little chilly from the night air. I’d spent what seemed like several hours with Princess Luna, though she assured me it was much less. I stood and stretched, remarkably refreshed. She’d sent me back, saying that to miss the first fire for my own home would be rude to my guests and friends. I yawned and started back. “-and then write on his face!” Rainbow exclaimed, as I approached the Elements. They  formed a small arc near the punch bowl. “Rainbow, we are not pranking Wesley at his first party here!” Rarity retorted. “Anyways, if you tried to do all that-” “Um, girls?” Fluttershy tried to interject while I paced quietly up behind the others. “-you would probably set yourself on fire. Not to mention the rest of us.” “Oh yeah?” The chromatic wonder retorted. “Just you watch, I’d-” “Girls, see, the thing is-” “-be fine! And even if I wasn’t, it’s not like-” “Wes is sneaking up behind you right now, and-” “BOO!” I yelled. Fluttershy sighed as the other five shrieked and tied themselves into a whimpering pastel knot. I nearly fell over laughing. “Yeah, Rainbow?” I gasped, between breaths. “Who’s going to prank who?” “Oh...oh!” she growled, as they untangled themselves. “Now you’ve started it, buster! You have no idea what you’re in for! I’m going to-” “You’re back!” Pinkie interrupted. “Now we can start the fire!” Rainbow muttered dire imprecations as the party planner led us away. Tinder and logs were laid in a fire-ring, cut neatly into the grass and circled with bricks. The basket of flammables, which had been filling throughout the night, sat near. I took the striker from Pinkie and sent a shower of sparks into the pit. A curl of smoke ascended from the tinder and I breathed on it softly, coaxing the tiny coals into flame. Within moments, tongues of fire licked up the logs, illuminating our surroundings and warming us gently. I picked something randomly from the gifts and fed it into the conflagration. Soon the basket was empty, and a small haze of sweet smelling smoke drifted around us. I fumbled in my pocket and pulled out the paper I’d prepared earlier. “What’s yours?” Twilight asked as I unfolded it, showing a crude drawing. “A .” I said. “I don’t know the Equestrian word. They’re a symbol of hospitality in my world. I thought, well, I don’t want to ever be short of visitors.” As I flattened the paper, another piece fell free. I picked it up with a frown. It was small and dark blue, with a silver crescent inlaid. Ah. I thought. From Luna. I fed it into the fire with my own. “Look!” Applejack pointed. The dark paper had given off a wisp of glowing blue smoke, which didn’t drift in the wind; instead, it floated into the sky. A few stars glittered and drifted slightly, forming a familiar pattern. “Heh. Heh hahhaha!” The others looked curiously as I laughed, staring up at the Big Dipper, transplanted into the Equestrian the sky. For a while it seemed, I’d have my guiding star.