74 - End
"Ouch!" I flinched as something stabbed me.
"Hold still." Doctor Silk Suture gave me sharp stare, and I subsided. His magic gently pulled the thread in my arm tight, looping around for another pass.
"Sorry." I concentrated, and the pain dwindled to a vague irritation. If I wasn't so exhausted, I could have helped staunch the blood and flushed the wound myself, but for now I was happy to let him do his job. All around us, the small fort was occupied with triage and accounting. The Guard had arrived at the scene of our battle within minutes, ready to help. Celestia had fired off orders, and we'd been rushed back to the base for first-aid and recovery. It hadn't taken long for further support to arrive once the last of the crystal golems had been mopped up and the fortress was deemed relatively secure.
"Commander Shining!" I called as Twilight's brother trotted through the gate. "Or is it Emperor now? Did you get them? How's it going?" He levitated two smoke-filled flasks in response, and I frowned. "Only two?"
"Commander is fine." Shining grimaced. "Glisten and the other lieutenant, the earth pony, were simple enough. Sunset claimed Shadow isn't a threat, and we've got agents tracking Bodkin. He might be fast but we'll get him eventually." I nodded at that. Shadow was likely gone with Sombra, although it would be great if we could get confirmation from Cog. He was difficult to reach, unfortunately.
"I wish I could have helped more." He frowned, looking to where Twilight was being bandaged.
"Next time, maybe." I grinned. "Set your techs working to hook the Empire into the internet."
"Already happening." He sighed. "Still."
"Hey, it turned out." I waved at the surrounding chaos. "We carried the day. Although having you here would have been great."
"It was a near thing, from what I've heard."
"True." I tried to shrug, but my doctor stopped me with a hiss. "Um, where is Sunset? I haven't seen her."
"The Princesses isolated her because of her… condition." He glanced meaningfully at the civilians. "They want her to have some choice, when she's ready for it."
"Huh." I tried to turn, looking to where a few tents had been set aside for the more serious cases.
"Alright, I've had enough of you tearing up my work." Silk Suture pinned me down gently, and I felt a hypodermic stab my arm.
"Hey!" I twitched as something cold flowed into my veins, but I subsided as a quick numbness started spreading. "I'll be fine, I promise!"
"If that doesn't knock you out, I'll believe you. It's just a mild sedative. But you're making my job difficult."
"I'll be— Oh." My head suddenly swam, and I realized I really, really wanted to take a nap. "I'll just lay down now."
"That's what I thought."
"Later, Wes." Shining smiled and turned to go.
"Later, Commander…"
"Urgh." When I came to, I found my head resting on something smooth and warm. "Bit?"
"Mmm?"
"It's funny." I surveyed the inside of the small tent we'd shared for the past few days. "You're just as constant as my pillow as you were at my feet."
"I like listening to you breathe."
"Heh." I rubbed my eyes. It was dark, probably the middle of the night. "You know, I'm sometimes amazed at how you manage to be cute and not creepy."
"I practice."
"What's the final count?"
"Several of the Guard needed intensive treatment, but they should survive. One of my generals is retiring, although I may be able to repair him. Some of the flying golems escaped the bombardment and nearly caused serious trouble. Beyond that, massive amounts of minor injuries. I counted seventeen stitches on you. Our entire core group was diagnosed with extreme exhaustion and minor soul-burn, although the alicorns and I will recover more easily. Your sister remains in seclusion, to curb the spread of rumor. Go back to sleep."
"Mmm." I rolled over, pulled my blanket tighter, wrapped my arms around her, and drifted off again.
"…the hand shut with this huge clang and yanked Sombra back through the portal. After that, the portal sealed up. I think Cog helped. You fainted, the super-link shattered, and we all basically collapsed. The Guard showed up soon after."
"Alright." Bit signed the paper and pushed it over to me. "Sign that and we're done with your report."
"Good." I looked out over the ocean. "Lyra promised to return my surfboard after supper. Are you sure you're okay with doing this?"
"I enjoy writing and I'm a good listener." Bit capped her bottle of ink and cleaned her quill. "Besides, I'm nearly done. I just need Lyra and Fluttershy's reports to complete the set." The afternoon light sparkled on the sea. I sipped my drink and sighed happily.
"Man, I love this place. I wonder what a beach-house costs?" I glanced back at the bungalow behind us. "Maybe a smaller one, though."
After we'd recovered enough for travel, the Princesses had decided that all of us needed a little peace and quiet to get over the aftereffects of the battle. Lyra had dropped a few broad hints, and they'd packed the entire group off to Horseshoe bay for an extended vacation. We'd been goofing off and playing around ever since. Most of us were healing quickly, with the help of a little magic and lots of fresh air. I was sitting on the veranda with Rarity, Bit, and Rainbow, who was napping soundly.
"I believe you could afford one if you were willing to sell that obnoxious contraption of yours." Rarity lowered her shades to peer over her newspaper. We were sitting on the veranda, watching the ocean roll in. "Didn't Luna make you a generous offer?"
"I'm not selling my bike!" I gave her a shocked stare. "I've already promised to let the Princesses take it apart if they help me get it back to Ponyville. I think I can re-work the engine, maybe make it run off glitter and rainbows or something."
"As long as it's quieter." The fashionista sniffed. "Really, I never dreamed 'progress' would be so barbaric."
"That's nothing." I grinned and crossed my arms behind my head. "A guy I knew had this Harley Davidson, a big old cruiser bike, and he put a nitrous booster on it! The thing was—"
"Weeeeeeeees!" Twilight came galloping out of the house.
"Huh? What?" I jerked upright, nearly spilling my iced tea. "Trouble?"
"It's S-Sunset! Tell her she's wrong!" Twilight gave me a pleading look.
"It's totally true." Sunset trotted after, proudly preening one of her new wings. "We can't both be the princess of magic. You're obviously the princess of friendship."
"But friendship IS magic!" Twilight stomped a hoof.
"Exactly!" Sunset nodded in triumph. "So you're the princess of friendship-magic. That makes me the princess of real magic. See?" She gave a pleased grin.
"Weeeees!" Twilight's lip wobbled in a pout.
"Wait, wait." I waved my hands. "Sunset, I thought you were calling yourself the alicorn of worlds?"
"That was yesterday's Sunset." My sister gave an imperious sniff.
"Next thing we know, you'll be adding 'great and powerful' to your name." Rarity gave a disparaging chuckle. "Anyways, you're not a Princess yet. Or did Their Royal Majesties offer you a crown?"
"Um." Sunset gave us an uncertain glance. She'd talked extensively with Celestia and Luna, but she had kept the discussions private so far. "I'm getting a stained-glass window?"
"Snerk." We all looked over to Rainbow, who propped herself up on one bandaged hoof and grinned. "I've got at least three of those. Can I be the Princess of Awesome? I'll be at least twen—"
"We're really getting a window?" I interrupted. "Cool."
"Oh, yeah. Save the world, get a window." Rainbow flopped back down. She'd been wounded the most and was still hesitant to move much. "You get used to it."
"Caaaaaake!" Pinkie called, from inside. "Come and get it!" There was a general movement towards the door, and Sunset fell in beside me.
"They did," she murmured. “Offer me a crown, that is.”
"Really?" I pictured it, smiling. “How's that work?"
"Ponies will expect it." She fluffed a wing. "I was Celestia's student. She said something about me learning the true meaning of friendship and then… yeah."
"So?" I slowed at the door, turning to lean against the wall. "Did you accept?"
"Not yet." She sighed, long and soft. "I’m just… I don't know. Should I? Do I deserve it?"
"Oh, come on." I reached out and bopped her on the head. "Isn't this what Twilight went through, too? Remember what Celestia said?"
"It's not the crown, but the pony who wears it." She looked down. "But Wes, this… " She waved a hoof vaguely. "I didn't do any more than them." She pointed into the bungalow where Pinkie was enthusiastically serving chocolate-chocolate-double-chocolate-chip-with-coconut cake for supper. "Sure, I helped save the world, but you heard Rainbow. That's old hat for them. So why me?"
"Oh." I pinched the bridge of my nose, and stared at the sea. "Yeah, I get that." I shrugged. "And, well, that's not wrong." We watched the waves in silence a moment. "Each of those ponies deserves honor and praise for what they've done, and they'll get it. Maybe this time you were just lucky."
"Pfeh." She grimaced. "Princess of luck, huh?"
"Aw, don't be like that." I ruffled her mane. "Being royalty isn't all sunshine and sparkles from what I hear. Besides, you're not taking anything from them, and they won't begrudge you the honor at all. If you want the privilege and extra work, accept. If you want to hide your wings and shoot for 'normal', you can do that too. It's up to you and there's nothing wrong with either choice. You already have work, right? With the tears?"
"Yeah." She gazed at the ocean. "We don't know if there's more. Still, sompony needs to find out. I can close them, too. I've got the knowledge and magic for it."
"Would it be useful to have the support of the crown for that?"
"Probably."
"That's a beginning."
"Mmm."
"Come on, let's get some cake." I turned towards the party and she followed.
"Oh yeah, they've started."
I looked up at the Tree of Harmony. It was pulsing, strands of white magic surging up and down inside the glassy trunk.
Sunset nodded and stepped forward. We were in the cavern under the Tree. Floodlights borrowed from the archeologists lit our area, but the Well seemed just as deep and dark as ever.
"You sure this is necessary?" I frowned as her horn started glowing.
"Completely. If we don't re-attach the Elements to the Tree, this tear will keep widening. It's not obvious, but the stresses that it's creating cause wrinkles in reality that stretch thousands of miles. I’m certain the Tuatha found their jump-off point by calculating it from here. If we can alleviate even a little of that strain, we can cut down the threat of incursions significantly."
"Alright." I watched carefully as she cast her spell. For a second, at the tip of her horn, I saw a fragment of the Pattern glimmer in her aura. She was truly casting as an alicorn now.
Her spell settled across the tear with crackles and swirls, cyan magic forming a fragile net. She sighed and stepped back as it took.
"Oh, look." I pointed into the Well as a figure appeared in the depths. It zoomed towards us, quickly resolving into a familiar manikin.
"Dang it, Cog!" Sunset yelled as a waxy white hand poked out of the tear, fraying her carefully constructed magic. "I just made that!"
"It's possible I'm sorry." It tilted its head sideways as it climbed over the edge. "When I realized you were here, I came to meet you."
"Fine, fine." She sighed. "What's up?"
"Firstly, some good news." Cog folded its hands, standing perfectly still. "I have sequestered Sombra and his lieutenant. They are in a world-line where they can cause no harm. Don't worry about them anymore. Even if they do manage to escape, I will deal with the problem."
"You're not… hurting them?" Sunset asked hesitantly.
"No." Cog shook its head. "I have no need for cruelty. They may be bored, but that's all."
"And bad news now?" I frowned.
"No, no bad news. Secondly, thank you again for your assistance. My power is limited, and having your aid is much appreciated."
"You're welcome."
"No problem."
"Thirdly, I have something for those above." It turned and walked across the surface of the tear like it was solid. It touched the trunk of the Tree and its hand melded into the crystal. After a second, the trunk bulged outwards, a new stalk surging upwards swift and smooth. It withdrew its hand, waved once, and fell into the Well smoothly and silently.
"That guy is weird." Sunset patched up her spell and shrugged. "I guess we're done here. We should go see what happened up top."
"It's a box."
"Yup!" Twilight showed us the chest, a hexagonal lockbox with six keyholes. "It came out of a flower! I can't wait to find out what's in it!"
"I guess that's Cog's gift, then." I smiled at her excitement. "It's cool. Looks like you're in for more adventures at least."
"Really, Wes." Sunset sighed. "Did you expect anything else, considering where we live?"
"Hah, true. Life in Ponyville is never boring."
"I'm so glad to be done with the bandages." Rainbow floated alongside me, just at ear-level, as we walked down the hall. We were trailing at the back of the group. "Really, that Bodkin guy was no slouch."
"Well, if you're better, I guess we're all officially recovered, huh?"
"Yup!" Rainbow grinned. "Now we get to see our window. Tomorrow Sunset gets her crown, there’s a party and a parade, Celestia passes out hugs, and everything goes back to normal!"
"Normal crazy, you mean."
"Well, yeah. If life stopped being crazy, it wouldn't be normal, right?"
"Pff. That's one way of looking at it, I guess."
I paused as the guards waved us through the door, into the gallery.
"How many halls of windows do they have?" I looked around. "You guys save the world, what, twice a year?"
"Something like that." Rainbow shrugged. "This one's a little out of the way, but it gets nice sun."
"Welcome!" Celestia approached from the other end of the hall. "It's good to see you here. What do you think?"
She waved a wing and the curtains pulled back, revealing the stained-glass windows in the walls. There was more than one, which surprised me a little. They showed various scenes, starting with a rough representation of me falling through a rip in reality. We traced the story along and it hit the high points: the re-appearance of the Crystal Empire, truce with the changelings, facing down the lieutenants, the shattering Mirror, and finally, our battle with Sombra.
The last one was the most impressive, an intricate piece which showed everypony's cutie marks, meshed together through a ring decorated with jasmine flowers and marked with the Little Dipper, throwing a torrent of rainbow light to force a pair of glowing green and purple eyes into a rift filled with intricate mechanisms.
I grinned, looking up at it.
It felt good. A physical record of what I'd helped accomplish. I looked around and saw the smiles of my friends. It was just a picture, but it felt good to have this symbol of recognition.
We would be remembered for this, and it was something worth being remembered for.
"Sunset, stop pacing!"
"Oh, like you're one to talk, Twilight!"
"You weren't even here for my coronation!"
"Hey, don't fight." I glanced up from my reading. Sunset's coronation was tomorrow, and she couldn't sleep. I understood it was stressful for her, but that meant we couldn't sleep. "Look, maybe we can find something else to talk about. Like, how about this. When we were moving between worlds, you did something funny with the timelines, right Sunset?"
"Really?" Twilight perked up at that. "How did you do that?"
"Well, I—"
"No wait, I'm not done yet." I waved a hand. "I've been thinking. If you could bend time, why didn't you take us further back? Maybe we could have changed something, avoided some of that mess."
"No, no, no." My sister stomped a hoof. "Look, Wes. Time doesn't work like that. All I could do was speed it up or slow it down. It was still moving forward in both frames. I just changed the speed it was moving at, because we were the ones who had observed both reference frames and at the time we were outside them."
"Ah, but if that's the case—" Twilight took up the discussion eagerly.
I nodded once and went back to my reading. I might not get much sleep, but at least they weren't fighting.
<"Stupid fuzzy ponies with stupid fluffy manes and stupid feathery wings and stupid adorable eyes!">
I stalked down the corridor, Bit pacing patiently alongside.
<"Fuzzy, fuzzy, huggable fluffy ponies!"> I whipped around a corner, annoyance driving me forward.
<"I thinked ceremony was nice.">
<"Thought the ceremony was nice, Bit.">
<"I thought the ceremony was nice.">
<"Oh, it was."> I nodded once, and slammed open a door. <"Yesterday was wonderful. Sunset was beautiful, and everything went smoothly. She’s officially a princess now, and all the nice, fluffy ponies saw her. The fuzzy, stupid, nice ponies!">
<"Wes?"> Twilight looked up in surprise as I stomped past the sunbeam she was reading in. <"What's gotten into you? Where are you off to?">
<"I'm going to yell at a fluffy adorable pony princess!"> I tromped past, and she rose to follow.
<"Princess? Who? What happened?">
<"That cute, fuzzy white one! She pulled a fast one, tricked me, hornswoggled me!">
<"She what?"> I turned back at the shock in her voice.
<"She hornswoggled me! Look—"> I stopped, as Twilight flinched. <"What's wrong?">
<"That… word.">
<"What, hornswoggled?">
<"Don't say it!"> She shuddered.
<"What?"> Some of my annoyance fell away, replaced by curiosity. <"Why not?">
<"It… it just sounds so dirty.">
<"Hornswoggled."> Bit repeated slowly. Twilight looked aghast.
<"Wes, what are you teaching her?">
<"English?"> I said, confused. <"Look, Twilight. I don't know what you're thinking, but hornswoggled—">
<"Just stop!">
<"Okay, okay, fine!"> I raised my hands in surrender. <"That word isn't a bad one. It just means she tricked me, got the better of me. Now I'm going to go yell at her until I feel better, and everything will be fine."> I turned down the corridor again and threw open the door to Celestia's laboratory. Twilight trotted hesitantly after with Bit.
"Celestia!" I waited until my friends were through and slammed the door loudly. It was very satisfying.
"Back here!" I followed the voice through a few doors, which connected to Luna’s lab.
"Celestia, I need— Woah!"
"Oh, Wes!" Celestia looked up from her work. She was disassembling my motorbike. It hung in the air, almost completely in pieces. Each one was limned with a golden glow. Complicated spell circles covered the floor, carefully arranging each component. It had been stripped completely down, and even the interior was being disassembled. The Princess moved through a small galaxy of parts, a caliper floating alongside a notebook and quill. It looked like the 'exploded diagrams' from my shop manual but in real life.
"That's incredible!" Twilight bounced up to the edge and tried to touch one of the pieces. It swooped away.
"Yeah, it's— No! I'm here to yell at you, Princess!"
"Well then." Celestia walked out of the construct, bits moving to avoid her before settling back into place. She stopped in front of me, and laid her tools down. "Please, proceed."
"Do you see this?" I reached into the bag I'd brought and whipped out a circlet. It was crystal wrapped with silver, formed into a jagged, delicate design. The brow was crooked into a square wave. It fit me perfectly.
"Your crown?"
"Yes! I found it shoved under my door this morning! It came with a note!" I whipped out the offending paper. On it was scrawled 'Congrats!', and a smiley sun face. "Is this from you?"
"Of course." Celestia looked perplexed. "I knew you didn't like ceremony, so—"
"I didn't want a crown!" I threw my hands in the air. "I don't want to be a prince! You just did this so you could make me ambassador to the Griffon Aerie, didn't you?"
"Ahem." Celestia coughed, looking slightly abashed. "Well, yes and no. You see—"
"I KNEW it!" I dropped my face to my hands and rubbed my eyes. "I don't want another job! I'm perfectly overcommitted as it is! Can't you find someone else?"
"Well, I can't make you be ambassador." Celestia put a comforting hoof on my shoulder. "But you see, now that your sister's a princess, I couldn't very well let you stay a commoner, could I?"
"You…that’s just an excuse! She’s not officially my sister! Is that rule even a thing?" I turned to Twilight. "What about Shining, or Spike?"
"Shining was already married to a Princess." She shrugged. "Spike has several titles now. I lose track of them. Wait, I think I have a list…" She thought for a moment. "Yeah. When we get back, I can show you."
"Urgh." I sighed, and slumped in defeat. "I… you… just… urgh."
"There there." Bit patted my back. "Look, things are already getting back to normal."
"This was a dumb plan. Stupid fluffy ponies. Crazy normal sucks. I need a vacation."
Knock knock
I set down my spoon and stood to open the door.
"Twilight? Sunset? What's up?"
"Come for a walk?" Sunset waved. "It's a great day."
I leaned out, peering around. Sure enough. The sun was shining brightly in the morning air. The leaves were golden brown, starting to migrate out of the trees for the winter and there was the wonderful nip to the wind that spoke of frost and snug, winter nights.
"Okay." I grabbed my jacket from the pegs by the door and shrugged it on. "What's up? Where are we going?"
"Well, we've been talking." Twilight led the way into town. I shoved my hands in my pockets and followed.
"See, Twilight's talent is sort of magic and so is mine," Sunset said. "Her talent is seeing magic from the inside, magic as it exists in the world-line. Everything that magic means to us while we're in reality."
"Sunset's talent seems like magic from the outside. Magic is movement of world-lines, and that's how her talent works. She sees her talent as changing reality and 'movement of worlds', because that's magic too. They're the same idea, approached from opposite directions."
"Cool." I nodded my understanding.
"We've been putting our heads together." Sunset gave me a serious glance. "Wes… if you want, we'll work on getting you home."
"Hum." I breathed in deep, and leaned back to look at the sky. "Okay. If you want, I wouldn't object. I mean, you plan to do this anyways, right?"
"Heh." Twilight giggled. "Yeah, well. Can't resist a challenge."
"We plan to investigate, at least." Sunset grinned. "Just to see if it's feasible. We'd need to find out more about lots of things. Inheritance. Transcendence. What 'West' really means. Time differences. It might not work."
"That's fine too. Listen, I'm not going to die if I never make it home. Give me a few years and I might even stop calling it that." I smiled at my friends. "It's not the places that make somewhere home, but the people. And… well, I've got friends and family here now, too." I sighed. "Leaving would mean losing ponies important to me, even as staying means losing people important to me. Change is continually hard. Even if you do figure it out… well, I may say no."
"That's fine." Twilight shrugged. "If you want to stay, we won't stop you. We just wanted your input before we moved ahead."
"You have my blessing." I grinned. "Thanks, both of you."
"Oh, we're here." Sunset stopped in front of the library. "Come on, Wes." She swung the door open and stepped in.
"What?" I gave Twilight a puzzled glance. "I thought this was a walk."
"It was. Now we're here." She waved me inside and I hesitantly entered.
"Okay, what are—"
"SURPRISE!" Confetti exploded around me as the lights flashed on. Balloons littered the ceiling, paper chains decorated the walls, games, snacks, and ponies filled the floor. Pinkie bounced up and threw her hooves on my shoulders to look me in the eye. "Surprise, Wes! Welcome to the party! You're the last one, so let's get STARTED!"
Music washed the room, breaking the silence. A dozen conversations broke out. Groups formed, games began. Sakura waved excitedly, motioning me to join her.
"Wait, what is this?" I grabbed Pinkie before she vanished. "What's the occasion? What's happening?"
"Silly Wes, it's a happily-ever-after party!"
"What?" But… you can't do that! This isn't—"
"Wes, we have one of these every year." Pinkie gave me a serious stare. "You don't need an end, you don't need a beginning. If you want to be happy, don't wait around for it to find you. You just need to live it!"
"Oh." I grinned. I could get behind that.
That's all, folks! I hope you found the ending satisfying. I don't get many chances to practice them, you see.
If you're interested in reading my final thoughts, I've written a blog on that. Check my page, or find it at this link.
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I... but... no... More! I humbly request a sequel!
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED
Now. Now comes the fun with the warp of the world lines, and the weft of reality.
Also, need that fast leutenant shoving down that hole, so that Cog can use it to power their hamster wheel.
Go on, get out of here. shows over. Donations accepted at the door.
This story was incredible! I really enjoyed reading it! Too bad everything comes to an end though.. I kinda hope for a sequel or something, but I can't have everything.
Thank alot for writing this!
-Novitality
I teared up a little...
It was a long ride, but it was worth it.
No ! That can't be the end ! This story must continue until the end of the Time !
... Unless the writter says it's over. It was an amazing story, thank's for writting it.
It's always so weird when a hugeass story ends.
I liked this story. Although I'm curious as to what type of relationship would develop between Bit and Wes. I wonder if Wes will finally start thinking of Bit as a she and if that will affect his thinking of her. :P
4968500 ...and I humbly decline, at least for now. I discuss this briefly in my blog.
4968511 Hah, entertained indeed! Thanks for waving the hat, Booster.
4968524 You're welcome, thanks for reading.
4968531 I'm glad you liked it, and honored you were willing to shed a tear.
4968545 You're welcome! Thanks for reading.
4968562 I know, right? I actually got a bit of a rush typing 'The End'.
4968678 I'm glad you liked it! And honestly, I have no idea. Since I'm not planning a sequel,you're free to imagine whatever you like.
4968744
Good luck with whatever your next story is.
4968744 Then you have my thanks for this wonderful tale and I'm eagerly looking forward to any eventual new stories in the future.
It was a great ride. I look forward to what you write next. I am slightly hoping for a Human in equestria who has bionics or something of that nature. I am always a sucker for bionics or anything similar.
I greatly enjoyed reading this story and wish you luck in future endevours (hopefully including a sequel).
WOOO~! Great story, it was one heck of a ride. I look forward to the next story. Maybe Discord? Ever since you've started describing magic (Which I really liked and think is well thought out) I've been curious to see what your take on Discord's magic is.
Anyways, good job!
Noice.
memecrunch.com/meme/XK4U/nooice/image.png
Shame that this fic is over (unless it isn't
)
Maybe you might even make a sequel eventually. *HINT HINT*
4968756 Thank you!
4968782 Your welcome! I appreciate your support.
4968889 Thanks! I probably won't write another human fic unless it's a crossover, but I'll keep that in mind. If you like bionics, I'd suggest reading John. C. Wright's Golden Age books; his views on mind/machine and AI actually revolutionized my thoughts on the subject.
4969074 I'm glad you liked it! A sequel is not impossible. You're welcome to hope. I just don't plan on it for now.
4969240 I'm glad you liked it! My views on Discord make him fiendishly difficult to write, but also interesting and rewarding. I'll keep that in mind.
4969294 Thanks! Don't hold your breath for a sequel, but stranger things have happened.
We are not amused. THIS MUST NOT END!!!!! I have an idea for an OC you could use in a sequel. PM me if you want to hear.
4969923 I apologize, but... it's dead, Jim. However, if I do decide to write a sequel, I may drop you a line.
Beautiful, contained, and ambiguous. The perfect ending. A sequel would be good, but it would be optional. This is whole enough as it is.
4970176 thanks, also I have a delivery that makes slight sense (with magic)
*Clap Clap Clap* Well done. Been reading from the beginning and the ride was great. Thank you for this excellent story. Have a second thumbs up.
4970178 I am in complete agreement.
4969491 Yeah I will give those books a read if I can. Also if you do a story that has a human with bionics. I would play the bionics against the pony characters and try to figure out how they react. Also for a crossover idea Soldier G65434-2 or Goggles the player character of System Shock 2 would be a cool idea.
Perfect!
4970178 Thanks! I'm glad the ending satisfied.
4970428 You're welcome!
4971052 That... is high praise indeed. Thanks!
4971638 that is best word that describes this story
You have done a fantastic job on this
I loved the story a lot and the ending was quite nice as well.
The only thing I really found lacking in not by much is conclusion with Bit and Wes. You see, over the time Bit became my favorite character in the story and while her "growing up" arc have concluded with her becoming the queen of the hive and inheriting her mothers power it felt like you opened a new one for her personal relation with the father figure and the change of how she sees him and did not finish it. At least that's how I feel. Still it was an awesome story and I em unbelievably happy to have had the privilege of reading.
i have no words for how great this story is and i'm really sad to see it end. (p.s. i am now gonna call the celestial plain "celestia's creepy stalker dimension" from now on.)
4972585 Thanks for the praise. I do understand your feelings on that, but.... for various reasons, I felt that this was the best I could do. Properly dealing with that sort of relationship would have meant changing the planned ending significantly. I'm glad you liked it anyways.
4974767 Yes! New headcannon installed! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the compliments!
Sequel
4975577 ...not planned. But stranger things have happened; you're welcome to hope and dream.
Congratulations on finishing the ff! ;D good job ;) it was a damn fine ff ^^
4976886 Thanks! I'm very happy you liked it.
I don't really know what to say, besides thank you once again for this amazing story!
I can't wait to see what comes next, whether it's a sequel, or a completely new story, I look forward to it.
Well, looks like I waited to long to read the new chapters and now I have to reread the whole thing...
4983027 Thanks! I hope I can write something worth reading.
4991210 How sad! :P If you wait just a little longer, I'll start uploading my polished chapters. I'm not changing too much, but the first few are definitely more readable.
4992084 There needs to be a button that unchecks all the chapters of a story...
So, are the numbered chapters the ones that were "finalized"?
4996837 Yup! No big (read: plot) changes, but lots of grammar and readability. Some spelling and punctuation, too, although I'm much worse at that. The more dialogue there is, the less likely things are to change. I'm also ironing out little things, like Wes' shoes changing several times before he gets boots.
Looking back, my writing has changed a lot since the first chapter. Hopefully, as I go on, the speed of my revisions will improve. I'd like to be done in a few weeks.
4996233 I agree. One box at the top, to check/uncheck them all would be nice.
4996859 Wait... his shoes kept changing?
Well, I would have kept that in to see how many people noticed it...
4996862 ...One box to check them all, and in the darkness bind them.
5001168 Sunset's eyes change color, too.
I would have put this comment on the chapter that involves the giant mechanical hand but I just had to keep reading
Wes and friends used Temporal Fist!
It was Super Effective!
Sombra was defeated.
5008650
Oh, okay. Now that i think about it, it was a reference in that story too, it just wasn't explained and i didn't bother to ask. Thanks
And with the sheer amount of Stuff out there, it's not unreasonable that someone will draw imaginary lines between this and something else. It's our minds compulsory tendency to make associations between things, to make us feel clever and in control. As long as you don't take it too far and become a conspiracy theorist
payload.cargocollective.com/1/1/62982/1396131/Primeval%20duncans%20wall%206%20copy.JPG
Oh, and i can definitely recommend Diaries. It's long, but really really well written, and with an awesome sense of humor (in my opinion, anyways.)
Edit: Oh, and congrats on finishing your story, it was a good read
5008858 Thanks, I'm glad you liked it!
Yeah, references and associations are interesting to think about. One of the cool things about the Web is the way it can reflect human thought; hyperlinks and information networks can be very effective as tools for mind-mapping. If you've ever been to TVtropes you'll know what I mean; I'm convinced that one of the reasons that site (and wiki's in general) is so addictive is because of the way it references things in a similar way to how our minds work.
One neat way to utilize this 'association reflex' in writing is to hint and half-suggest things. Readers fill in the blanks with what they find interesting; it utilizes the readers own suspension of disbelief to make the story more intriguing. Foreshadowing is a staple of literary technique because of this. The comments I get sometimes make me wonder if I take it too far, though; on the one hand, half-explained hints can be fascinating, but they can also give an impenetrable, labyrinthine quality if overused.
Is Diaries of a Madman a fanfiction? I don't think I've seen it before.
Here's the link.
Single longest story on Fimfiction. Amazing world building and characterization. A word of warning though; The dark and mature tags are merited. There are a few rather gory sequences, and a few more explicit sex scenes. That is far from the focus of the story, however, and they are clearly labelled and can be skipped with little consequence.
The story is barely halfway done, from what i understand.
5009311 No wonder; I usually leave that box unchecked.
I do like long stories, though, so I may take a look anyways. Thanks!
5023673 well i purposely left out that consideration mainly because nothing concert can be said about magic other then "its magic why do you really care so much?" i don't think we are give any kind of data on magic levels and how they compare energy cost for the different abilities. The only thing even close to this is dash's wing power and that seems like a mix of physical ability and magic.
only we get some sort of measurable unit for magic energy that i can relate back to a physical event then i will be more then happy to create a conversion table and take a stab at guessing how much energy it takes to do some of the stuff we see the ponies doing.
It took a solid 12 hours to read, and I gotta say, it was quite enjoyable! :-)
aaaaaa dam pleas tell me there going to be more in a sequel at some point