It all started when I went to that old closing fish and chippery. I ate some chips there, to the warning of the guy who said it will change your life forever. Well it has. It seems I'm turning into an equine. My fingers have disappeared, leaving me with stubs. I've grown a lump on my head and my ears are sticking out off my head, so never ignore warnings my friends, even ones from the odd guy who works at a fish and chippery.

'What is it about humans that urges them seek out so many endeavors in order to feed their desires? Greed, power, family, friends, philosophy, knowledge; infinite goals and infinite reasons behind them. Whoever or whatever created these beings are either cunning; to create self motivating creatures that will constantly push the limits of what's possible, or downright cruel; never truly allowing them to feel true fulfillment or satisfaction. The point is humans were created with a void, a missing piece left intentionally empty never to be filled, an undying hunger.'

A bit grim right? The names Rodney, and in case you're wondering, this is the story of my life. A life of Magic, Gods, and regrettably, Ponies. Yeah, freakin-multi-techno-collored-goody-ponies.
But it's not all bad really, got way healthier with a more green diet. Though the lack of meat can be painful at times, that one landed me in less than desired situations. I get to screw with innocent ponies on a regular basis. Didn't kill myself or everyone else with me either. So not a bad deal really, even ended up retiring as teacher.

Teen for language and some adult themes.
This takes place before season 3.

HIATUS: Currently at a programmer's boot camp. Will be done late June 2015.

AN: If you can see past my cruddy writing skills there's plenty to tickle your funny bones, I hope. First attempt at writing a fic.

Twilight, seeing that her friend needed a little bit of companionship, decided to help him get a date.

But boy, did he aim a little too high for her taste.

Now, her and Spike need to help this putz of a human snatch a date from one of the most undateable beings on the planet, Princess Celestia.

Needless to say, they're doomed.

Cover art used with permission by Lydia-Rawr

Warning: Story will contain horrible romance clichés, cutsieness, and all around silliness.

You have been warned.

This is Mason, your average 10 year old kid, living in a good town with a good school, awesome friends, and overall just a good life. But when his parents are taken in a car crash, that he miraculously survived, he now lives in a orphanage.

One day Mason wishes for a little more in life. Well Mason gets his wish....in the form of a colt....surrounded by technicolored ponies....yeah not what he was going for. Well on the bright side, he's a pegasus with awesome fire and lightning powers so what could go wrong?

NOTICE: For future chapters there will be additional tags. Tags are Dark. That's it you can go home now.

[Major Re-Edit]: This story had a major re-edit starting 10/3/17 to 10/19/17

Flurry Heart's Crystaling didn't quite go as planned. After vanishing in a powerful magical surge, she became the most high-profile missing pony case in Equestrian history. Twilight leads the search to find her, before it's too late.

Unbeknownst to her, Flurry has already been found, by an unfortunate human who happened to be hiking near the place she appeared. Flurry Heart's magic is irresistibly powerful, and soon changes all around her to suit her whims. Soon Flurry's rescuer is fighting to reverse the magic, before the authorities notice and separate him from the only possible source of help.

Cover by Zutcha, editing by the Eevees in the hood Two Bit and Sparktail.

Updates most Tuesdays.

Note: This story was written as a commission for the generous patron of the arts Crescent Pulsar. If you'd like one of your own, feel free to PM me.

This story is a sequel to A Thief's Tale: The Road to Redemption

They say that dreams are connected to your memories, whether they be past present or future. When Twilight Sparkle begins dreaming of events that she hasn't lived through, she wonders if they're some of Luna's nightly flights of fancy or if they're prophetic, but nothing ever seems to come of them... Other than a mess to clean up in the morning. Months of familiar dreams pass until they stop. For weeks, Twilight dreams of other things that don't involve the handsome pinkish stallion until one fateful summer day.

How do you escape your fate when you're not sure of what it is in the first place? How do you deal with emotions that don't feel like yours? How do you handle memories that don't belong to you?

A Time-Warp of A Thief's Tale: The Road To Redemption from the perspective of Twilight.

*Happens after Chapter Nineteen of A Thief's Tale: The Path To Penance*

Edited by AficionadoAvacado

Applejack's life is turned upside-down after she suddenly inherits the full powers of a goddess. She insists that it isn't a big deal and that she's the same pony as always, just bigger. Meanwhile, everypony else starts making demands on her and placing expectations on the 'new princess'. When the constant stream of petitions and gawkers starts interfering with farm work, Applejack reacts a bit strongly. Luna, fearing the worst, is determined to rescue Applejack from corruption, further irritating the farm pony. Will Applejack accept her destiny, or is destiny what you make of it?

After failing a math test, Anon returns home to her adoptive mother; Twilight, who attempts to teach Anon basic math. Unfortunately for her, math is harder than it appears.
Will Twilight learn a lesson?
Will Discord cause chaos?
Is Princess Celestia too fat?
Will Anon get the cake?
The answer is mostly yes.

My entry, and now the winner of the Anon Filly Contest
Featured on the day of its posting; 3/6/2020!
and
With a reading by StraightToThePointStudios!

A wave of suicides sweeps through Canterville. Sunset and the girls can't stop it.

But maybe Wallflower Blush can. She just needs someone to show her how.

A crossover with Puella Magi Madoka Magica.

Edited by DannyJ and Dubs Rewatcher. Cover art by Scampy.

With acknowledgement to Morning Sun, my resident Madoka Magica loremaster.

When Twilight is having problems in her relationship with Timber Spruce regarding her sexuality Sunset helps set her mind straight and gives her a confidence boost. Maybe by the end of the night Twilight's mind will be the only thing that's still straight.

Sex tag for talk of sexual activities.