An idea which wouldn't stop bugging me til I wrote it down. After Albert Wesker is defeated,he finds himself in a strange land. A strange land known as Equestria. How will a supposed god deal with the power of friendship and magic? Rated T to be safe.

Cover picture was drawn by Astringe on Deviantart, I can't draw for the life of me. I've asked permission and everything so no lawsuits should follow.

Albert Wesker magically survives his encounter with Chris Redfield and Sheva Alomar in Kijuju and finds himself in Equestria. Given the chance to begin a new life he'll have to decide, whether to continue his old ways or rather become a part of this society based on love and tolerance.

I used to be a human, but then I pissed off a wizard. Now I'm stuck in "Ponyville", in a land called "Equestria", and with no apparent way back home. I'm also pretty sure that I've just replaced somepony. I'd rather not have to answer any tricky questions, so I'm better off trying to be this unicorn whose name has been forced onto me.

My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I'm not a pony.

[Rated Teen for extensive use of vulgar language and sexual references.]

[Cover art made by richhap on deviant art. Unamused Twilight, go figure.]

[Brybrythesciguy is working on a cool audiobook of this story right HERE. The characters' voices are even simulated with an AI! I definitely recommend giving it a listen!]

When a couple of friends and I decided to go in Assassin's Creed costumes to an upcoming con, I'd been all for it. If I'd known what that merchant had to offer, I'd probably have declined. I certainly didn't want to end up in magical horse land, and I can't imagine my friends were too hot on the idea either. It didn't help that the first thing I did was kill someone.

The name's Josh, but no-one's called me that for a while. A long while.

One thousand years will give you such a crick in the neck.

I changed the title from 'The Subtle Knife' to 'The Silent Blade' to avoid confusion with the His Dark Materials trilogy.
Okay, yes, it's a LoHAV fic, and yes, he's a cosplayer, and yes, he was imprisoned in stone for 1000 years. Pretty original, I know. If you're going to complain about it in the comments, please don't.
If you wanted originality, you should've read this.
Featured on 1/05/14. Wow. I was not expecting that.

CANCELLED AS OF 18/08/2014

While I'm pretty sure that being transformed into a Hero from a Movie can be considered cool in more than one way, I just don't see it.
"This... is so wrong."

Being sent to a land where Myths and Legends come to life is not a fun way to die.
"Nice puppies?"

It's not Hell, and it's not Heaven, and I'm pretty sure that this isn't Nebraska!
"Oh, crap."

I'm not sure what happened.
"Thou vile beast, We demand to know how you appeared here!"
"You and I both, lady."

And apparently I'm not very good with first impressions.
"... She started it!"
"Thou deceiving mongrel, We weren't the one who started the battle!"
"You threw the first punch, I just returned the favor."

And even without interruptions by some assholes...
"You know what is the difference between us?"
"Oh, pray to tell?"
"I'm fireproof, you, not so much."

I feel that my goal to get home will be pretty hard to achieve, all thing consider.
"But that's impossible!"
"You know, I'm pretty sure that by now this word left my dictionary forever."

{Character-tags will be updated with the story.}
{Currently being Edited by The Snide Sniper.}

I finally saved up the money. I finally had a costume I felt was sufficient. I finally got to go to Botcon. As Soundwave. I even practiced his special disturbing walk cycle for extra effect. Granted, I had to do it all with a missing Laserbeak, but hey, I could always roleplay that the little bugger was off on reconnaissance.

Then I saw a way to skip that little mistake altogether: A perfectly sized, articulated Laserbeak, with straps to hold it on properly. I didn't even think about it. I didn't think about why what appeared to be an entire prop shop was set up in the middle of a con. I didn't think about what the chances of this particular prop even existing were. I couldn't even be bothered to think about the creepy dude wearing a creepy hooded robe working the booth as he chuckled at my enthusiastic strapping on of my perfectly-sized addition.

Now I'm in the world of ponies, and have been turned into one of the most technologically-advanced villains of a completely different universe. Nothing to do now except make myself useful, I suppose.

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And thus, I throw my hat into the ring with all the other LoHAV stories. I've been wanting to do this pretty much since the whole trend started, but couldn't figure out which character to use. Let's see how this goes, shall we?

With the sirens dealt with and no pressing time limit to return to her world now that she can come and go at will, Twilight spends some time catching up with Sunset Shimmer. She asks a question that has been on her mind for a while now. Namely, how Sunset ever thought invading Equestria with a few hundred zombified high school students was a remotely workable plan. It turns out that radically altering your entire physiology and brain chemistry doesn't do any favors for your IQ.

T for language, alcohol, and slight lewdity.

Starlight Glimmer is about to embark on a few little friendship lessons. Five to be exact. However she’s still a little murky on how to get all her friends to cooperate so things go as quickly and efficiently as possible. Luckily A surprise visit from another friend might solve Starlight’s problem.

An alternative take on Every Little Thing She Does and inspired by a conversation with Tired Old Man.

Spike has a problem regarding inviting two of his royal friends over on the same day! To avoid a diplomatic disaster, can Twilight, Starlight, and Spike prevent these two from meeting? No. No, they can’t. Let’s move on to the real problem.

Thanks to Tired Old Man and Nova Quill for their edits and inputs!

Starlight Glimmer wants to fly kites, but the weather is not scheduled for anything conducive to kite flying. Things go awry because the name 'Starlight Glimmer' is in that sentence.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Thanks to Mitch H for an offering that became the paraphrased second paragraph and helping connect two discordant ideas. Also Tired Old Man for his input and edits.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

My other fics Sunset Shimmer is MAD about Everything and A Newspaper Solves Everypony's Problem are tied into this, though not strictly required for enjoyment...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

...assuming there's any to be had.