• Member Since 29th Mar, 2018
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

The Cowardly Christian


For everyone seeking guidance, I recommend looking up Ravi Zacharias, he's gotten me out of some dark times. His FULL sermons are available online for ALL...

The Cowardly Christian

For everyone seeking guidance, I recommend looking up Ravi Zacharias, he's gotten me out of some dark times. His FULL sermons are available online for ALL...

PLEASE don't delete me...

...000...

ANNOUNCEMENT!

I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!

SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!

The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher it's now also available at Amazon and BarnsandNoble.

Above is the link to my book on Amazon.

Above is the link to my book on BarnesandNoble.

...111111...

SHAKE UP THE FALLS: CHALLENGE!!!

Primary Objective:

Tired of fanfictions just copying cannon and not doing anything really different? Well, I am!

So I say we do a 'deconstruction' of Dipper and Mabels 'sibling bond'! Through the following-

(BEGIN FLASH-FORWARD)

A forty-something year old Dipper enters his parents house and takes off his fast-food uniform with a sigh as he looks down at his meager paycheck.

A forty-something Mabel (wearing a crazy sweater and surrounded by dozens of cats); looks up.

"Hey Dipping sauce! Guess what!? I made a 50 ft butterfly made of comics...which I then set ablaze! I'm still the goddess of destruction!...also the police are here again to fine us for burning stuff without a permit...also for unintended arson damage to the neighbors house"

"Wait, what!?" Shouts Dipper just as a policeman steps out of the shadows and snatches up Dipper's paycheck.

"Ah, come on man! I worked overtime the whole week at the drive-through to earn that!" Shouts Dipper. But the Officer had already left.

Dipper feels a drop of water on his head...the ceiling was leaking...

"I also created a new water slide for Waddles!"

CRASH!

The ceiling gives way as a giant hog crashes down and breaks the floor; water soaking everything!

The cats scatter in panic; breaking various household objects as they do so.

Mabel laughs at this. "Ah, they're cute when their crazy!" She shouts as she takes a picture of them.

Dipper sighs as he goes to check the emergency fund...only to find it empty...

"Hey Dipping sauce! Can we have Pizza tonight!? Duck-tective will be on!" Shouts the ever cheerful yet oblivious Mabel.

Dipper just hangs his head...and cries...

(FLASH-FORWARD END)

What I just showed you was a peek into a future after Gravity falls, where Mabel no longer needs to fear growing up...because she doesn't have to! Why would she need to when she has a pushover brother who is willing to sacrifice everything: never getting married, never being independent, never having a life of his own to make her happy?!(in other words: An Enabler/Co-dependent relationship)

You can give this vision to whoever you want: Dipper, Mabel, Wendy, Pacifica, Stan, Ford, Soos, etc- You can have it sent to them at any time in the series, or have them sent back in time, or do a Peggy Sue! And have them use this knowledge to shatter cannon!

Also Bill Cipher's threat needs to be taken more seriously!(I'm talking actual full-on Armageddon preparation after his first appearance!) And they need to take Gideon seriously when he sends the creepy letters and hosts his TV show(You don't have to kill him, but the Pines Family have to at least Neutralize him...or make some kind preparation to fight him when he breaks out). EXAMPLE: Mable is forced to take Dipper more seriously and not mess with him to survive or The realization that she and her loved one's might die at the end of the summer make Wendy not so hung up on the whole 'age gap' with Dipper and goes out with him.

Also, the hero's need to be proactive! When Gideon starts sending creepy letters and making television broadcasts, they need to take care of him(kill or neutralize; either works). All that matters is that they strike first at the first sign of trouble; And don't just have them wait around and do nothing!

I WOULD PREFER NO LEMONS, LIMES, YAOI, YURI OR INCEST PLEASE! I HATE THAT STUFF...

Secondary objective: the following episodes can't end as they did in cannon!(especially if your doing a Crossover!) If you want to kill Wendy and have Pacifica be the rebound fine. Or you could have Wendy give Dipper a chance after saving him from ghosts...have them go on a couple dates(this can even happen off-screen if it's easier)...Wendy decides it's not going to work...and then land Pacifica on the rebound(that works too) Just do something different!(conversely, you could also just give Pacifica Tyrone and Dipper could have Wendy...just saying...everyone would be happy...)

"The Inconveniencing".(it annoyed me that no one did anything with Wendy's 'stare at wall and rethink everything' statement, I'd appreciate some help there)

Time Travelers Pig(call it semantics if you must, but I would never let a girl get hurt just to save a pig. Mabel's just going to have to suck it up and learn she can't have everything)(I'd recommend using Steven Universes 'The Answer' as a template(or it's Aesop at least)) The ending can't be cannon! Especially if your doing a crossover!(Endings where BOTH Waddles and Wendy are saved are also okay)

Fight Fighters(none of this band-aid solution 'hate each other in silence' stuff! I want to see an aftermath! Have Wendy find out the truth and be mad at both of them if you have to! Just do something different!

Little Dipper(I would prefer you just skip this episode entirely to be honest) (Or better yet, use Steven Universes 'Too short to Ride' episode as a template)(But if you do, do this episode...skip the 'twins idiotically Argue over the crystal instead of saving themselves and their home from Gideon' Scene. Have Dipper punch out Mabel and use the crystal. Or have Mabel punch out Dipper to use the crystal! Just do something different! Especially if it's Crossover! In that case have someone else punch them and use the crystal!)Considering what Dipper just sacrificed for Mable in Time travelers pig...I've always felt that Mable was more then a bit ungrateful and mean in this episode...

Boyz Crazy(I actually have no problem with the ending here believe it or not, but I was annoyed that it was rendered somewhat meaningless since there was no aftermath(between Dipper and Wendy anyway). So...you know...go do your thing. I would recommend using Steven universes 'week of Sardonyx' Arc as a template)

Into the Bunker((take a deep breath)look, you can handle the shipping however you want. But you have to have Mabel equally punished for the trouble(it is her fault they were locked in there in the first place after all). (Preferably where Wendy and Dipper are mad at Mabel and refuse to forgive her.)(their also needs to be an aftermath, Dipper having an honest, real conversation with Wendy about how he still has feelings for her and where they go from here. I'd recommend using Steven Universe episodes 'Mr Greg' or 'we need to talk' as templates)(also please just skip 'Roadside attraction' entirely, please)(if your doing a crossover, and bring someone else down there with them, you have to have them stop Mabel from locking Dipper up!

Northwest mansion Noir:(Groan) so much wasted potential. Pacifica's parents just forgive her? Nothing comes from the shipping? Pacifica was nearly killed by Wendy's ancestor, and nothing comes from that?)(P.S. I'm aware that a lot of people have actually fixed that in their fics(for which I'm grateful), I just feel that it needs to be said)

Mabel and Dipper v.s. the future(you do what you want with this...just don't make things so ridiculously one-sided and place all the blame on Dipper as it did in cannon(also, Dipper has to find out about Mabel's deal with Bill))

Tertiary objective:

Dipper V.S. Manliness: I always thought it weird that their was no girl(be it Wendy, pacifica, Tambry, or candy, etc) during his 'man trials'. Whether to beat him at being a 'man', laugh at his loincloth(or if he loses said loincloth, make him embarrassed), be inadvertently a crucial part of his 'trial', or just along for the ride...I just think it's a story possibility that should be explored is all... I also feel that Stan's hypocrisy for badmouthing ABBA while he himself watches 'The Duchess Approves' should be explored...as well as Dipper getting mad at Mable ridiculing him after everything he's done for her,

Carpet Diem: It always bugged me that nobody cared about Dippers leg getting chewed off by a wolf, A woodpecker biting out his tongue, or his personal belongings getting vandalized...Don't just slap a band-aid solution 'Status-Quo' approved ending on it...make Dipper mad at Mabel for putting him through all that!! Have it be a long messy fight! If you make them reconcile...they BOTH have to earn it!(especially Mable)

Summerween: Why is it so horrible for Dipper to want to celebrate Halloween his own way? True, he shouldn't of lied, but slanting the episode to put him completely in the wrong for wanting to have fun his own way...was completely unnecessary! Pleas make this episode more balanced

Dreamscape: For the most part I have no complaints about the episode, but it needs to be at least addressed that Stan only 'toughens' up Dipper while letting Mable do whatever she wants. Also, could someone PLEASE tackle Gideon when he's gloating about the Deed in front of the Pines?

Soos and the real girl(I don't get why Melody should have to leave, I'd rather prefer she stayed and have a sub-plot going with Soos)

Blendin's Game(I mostly had no problem with this...but it always bugged me that no one did anything with the 'young Wendy thinks Dipper is cute' storyline...some assistance here would be most appreciated)(I'd also like to see Wendy's reaction to that)

Tale of two Stans:(I'm with my fellow fanficton writers. Their should have at least been a small rift popping up between Mabel and Dipper after Mabel trusted Stan over Dipper(Especially considering she prevented Ford from killing Bill!))

Stanchurian Candidate: I feel it was rather selfish for Stan to put his pride over the safety of his family, when they reveal the mind-control to him and he gets mad, lay it on home how he's being selfish and seemingly uncaring about his family!

The last MabelCorn: I feel it was rather selfish for Mable to put her needs over the safety of her family, you can keep the 'Unicorns are selfish jerks' revelation if you want, but also lay it on home how she's being selfish and seemingly uncaring about her family!

Roadside Attraction:(Recommended by Emma Iveli) If you MUST do this episode, Mable has to give Dipper more advice then just 'move on'(seriously, it's a bit weird she didn't help him more with this considering how much she loves matchmaking and knows better then anyone else how socially awkward Dipper is) And she and Grunkle Stan need to get into a big argument over who's advice is more valid. (pointing out the hypocrisy of Mable badmouthing flirting with multiple people, when she dose the same would be funny)

Weirdmagedon: (can't think of anything...save for wanting to see a fic. where Ford's Bill-Killing Gun actually works...and Maybe some more character development/bonding between Dipper Wendy...and possibly Pacifica)(Oh, having Wendy comfort Dipper over his 'You can't make someone fall in love, you can only be worthy of love' speech would be nice too)

Escape from Reality: JUST BURST THE BUBBLE! Especially if it's a crossover! A 22 minute story wrapped up in 5 minutes! Mabel can just deal with it!(it would also be nice if Wendy, Pacifica, or SOMEONE comforted Dipper about not getting any Valentines, also it be nice if someone reminded Wendy and Soos that their friends and family are suffering and they need to rescue them before they go gallivanting in the bubble).

Take Back the Falls: If your doing a crossover, you HAVE to have someone from the Crossover-verse SUCCESSFULLY stop Stan from breaking the circle. By threatening him with death or dismemberment if necessary!

EX: Ford: "Him and I...Grammar Stanley"

Stan is about to beat him...when he feels cold steel pressed against his back

Undyne: "YOU %$@#% one foot from where you are, I'll #%&$%$ kill you!"

Stan gulps nervously...but stays in his place...and the cipher is complete...

NOTE: to all Wendip and Dipifica fans alike...have you considered just making a water proof Tyrone and giving him to Pacifica while Dipper has Wendy? You could literally have your cake and eat it too!

Well, that's more or less it, good hunting YAH'll!

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe and God and Jesus Christ is His son...

Then copy and paste this into your profile

7 reasons not to mess with kids

Reason 1 A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah.” The teacher asked, ” What if Jonah went to hell?” The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.

Reason 2 A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.” The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.” Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, “They will in a minute.”

Reason 3 A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year old After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”

Reason 4 One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.” The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

Reason 5 The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. “Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, he’s a doctor.’ A small voice at the back of the room rang out,”And there’s the teacher, she’s dead. ”

Reason 6 A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, “Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face..” “Yes,” the class said. “Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?” A little fellow shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”

Reason 7 The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.” Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want - God is watching the apples.

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Put your username on the list if you are of the 7% that will repost this: HalfaGhostGirl13, Du911

I FEAR DEATH!

That's why I believe in god, because I'm scared of what come's after death.

I'm scared of being tortured in hell for eternity.

Yes, pascals wager is more or less my only reason for belief.

Which is why I do not belief myself a true christian.

The true Christians(I feel) are the one's who preach the gospel at the cost of their own lives.

I'll never do that, I'm a coward.

Also on top of that, the idea of a universe with no god just fills me with despair.

Were just insignificant specks?

In a giant cold uncaring universe?

Why get out of bed?

Seriously, I consider the most courageous, most optimistic, most wise of people to be atheists.

They have this mindset of "all life is meaningless."

And still they find the strength to live their lives!

I wish I was that confident.

More power to you guys!

Finally, I just want you guys to know I hate intolerance.

I don't care for it, it makes me uncomfortable.

Frankly, I'd rather give everyone a hug!(a sentiment that has made many people uncomfortable, but what can you do?)

That being said, I have no idea what to do with homosexuals.

I have nothing against them(mild awkwardness non-withstanding), I'd be up for trying to strike a friendship with them.

And yet my religion is against it.

Let me be clear, My christian family(both literal and metaphorical) and my pastor have made it clear that there is nothing stopping a christian making friends with a homosexual.

Anyone who says otherwise isn't a true christian and should be ignored(not hurt though, please don't hurt us).

Knowing me though, I'd probably screw it up.

So I apologize in advance to all gays for being a horrible person.

Okay, now you can bring on the flames.

Know that I regret nothing.

Sincerely, du911, AKA d-u, AKA the cowardly christian.

AHMEN

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT BELIEVE IN POLYGAMY. IT'S A SYSTEM DOOMED TO FAILURE. I PUT IT IN MY STORIES STRICTLY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES.

YET ANOTHER DISCLAIMER: I may do A LOT of revenge fics...but that doesn't mean I endorse revenge, such things should be left to God(obvious exceptions are of course self-defense or protecting others). I merely do it because it's therapeutic. This is basically my equivalent of 'Writing and angry letter and tearing it up', by doing this I funnel my anger into a constructive endeavor. Make of that what you will

ONCE MORE; A Disclaimer: I also feel that sex before marriage is a bad idea; in my fics I only do so for entertainment purposes. Also; in them I only have it between the characters who will be together in the end...more importantly their only 'doing it' because they MIGHT die and the world COULD end soon. That's it.

ATTENTION! All stories are up for adoption! This dose NOT mean I won't continue them... If you feel like I'm going to slow...then you have my permission to take/copy these stories for yourself!

For non-pony related fanfiction; here's a link to my fanfiction site: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/5874134/The-Cowardly-Christian

About me...sort of

For everyone seeking guidance, I recommend looking up Ravi Zacharias, he's gotten me out of some dark times. His FULL sermons are available online for ALL...

PLEASE don't delete me...

...000...

ANNOUNCEMENT!

I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!

SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!

The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher it's now also available at Amazon and BarnsandNoble.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07BRNLR48/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1522279522&sr=1-1&keywords=DakotaUmlauf


Above is the link to my book on Amazon.

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/13-13-13-dakota-umlauf/1128212357?ean=9781984511966


Above is the link to my book on BarnesandNoble.

...111111...

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the World...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honored to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe and God and Jesus Christ is His son...

Then copy and paste this into your profile

7 reasons not to mess with kids

Reason 1 A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah.” The teacher asked, ” What if Jonah went to hell?” The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.

Reason 2 A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.” The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.” Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, “They will in a minute.”

Reason 3 A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year old After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, “Thou shall not kill.”

Reason 4 One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?” Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.” The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

Reason 5 The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. “Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, he’s a doctor.’ A small voice at the back of the room rang out,”And there’s the teacher, she’s dead. ”

Reason 6 A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, “Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face..” “Yes,” the class said. “Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?” A little fellow shouted, “Cause your feet ain’t empty.”

Reason 7 The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.” Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, “Take all you want - God is watching the apples.

If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93% of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Put your username on the list if you are of the 7% that will repost this: HalfaGhostGirl13, Du911

I FEAR DEATH!

That's why I believe in god, because I'm scared of what come's after death.

I'm scared of being tortured in hell for eternity.

Yes, pascals wager is more or less my only reason for belief.

Which is why I do not belief myself a true christian.

The true Christians(I feel) are the one's who preach the gospel at the cost of their own lives.

I'll never do that, I'm a coward.

Also on top of that, the idea of a universe with no god just fills me with despair.

Were just insignificant specks?

In a giant cold uncaring universe?

Why get out of bed?

Seriously, I consider the most courageous, most optimistic, most wise of people to be atheists.

They have this mindset of "all life is meaningless."

And still they find the strength to live their lives!

I wish I was that confident.

More power to you guys!

Finally, I just want you guys to know I hate intolerance.

I don't care for it, it makes me uncomfortable.

Frankly, I'd rather give everyone a hug!(a sentiment that has made many people uncomfortable, but what can you do?)

That being said, I have no idea what to do with homosexuals.

I have nothing against them(mild awkwardness non-withstanding), I'd be up for trying to strike a friendship with them.

And yet my religion is against it.

Let me be clear, My christian family(both literal and metaphorical) and my pastor have made it clear that there is nothing stopping a christian making friends with a homosexual.

Anyone who says otherwise isn't a true christian and should be ignored(not hurt though, please don't hurt us).

Knowing me though, I'd probably screw it up.

So I apologize in advance to all gays for being a horrible person.

Okay, now you can bring on the flames.

Know that I regret nothing.

Sincerely, du911, AKA d-u, AKA the cowardly christian.

AHMEN

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT BELIEVE IN POLYGAMY. IT'S A SYSTEM DOOMED TO FAILURE. I PUT IT IN MY STORIES STRICTLY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES.

YET ANOTHER DISCLAIMER: I may do A LOT of revenge fics...but that doesn't mean I endorse revenge, such things should be left to God(obvious exceptions are of course self-defense or protecting others). I merely do it because it's therapeutic. This is basically my equivalent of 'Writing and angry letter and tearing it up', by doing this I funnel my anger into a constructive endeavor. Make of that what you will

ONCE MORE; A Disclaimer: I also feel that sex before marriage is a bad idea; in my fics I only do so for entertainment purposes. Also; in them I only have it between the characters who will be together in the end...more importantly their only 'doing it' because they MIGHT die and the world COULD end soon. That's it.

ATTENTION! All stories are up for adoption! This dose NOT mean I won't continue them... If you feel like I'm going to slow...then you have my permission to take/copy these stories for yourself!

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Jun
9th
2019

A begging bowl for Patreon money · 9:59pm June 9th

For those who don't already know, I Have a Patreon account!

Here it is: https://www.patreon.com/TheCowardlyChristian

Like my fanfiction? Or want to help an aspiring author on the road to make a new book?

Then donate! Here are the tiers:

Level 1: For the one time donation of 1$ you can see all my posts

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Comments ( 40 )
  • Viewing 36 - 40 of 40

Thanks for the favourite on Fallout Girls, I try to update every two weeks!

2682066
Thanks. I was tired of the endless procession of copy-&-paste AAM stories, so I did not one, but three.

2679227
Sorry that took so long.

You took a familiar premise and took it into an original new direction with the twist at the end. Always funny to hear the girls critic cannon as well.

Thank you for adding Yet Another Anon-a-Miss Story to your favourites! Tell me, what did you like about the story?

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