Okay, I don't know if anyone can hear this, or read this, or whatever, but I'm trying my best to use Pinkie Pie's legendary fourth-wall-breaking powers to try and get a message out.

If you can hear this, I need help. I'm in Equestria, and man, this is strange. But I'm also stuck in Pinkie Pie's body, for some reason.

Yes, it's just as weird as it sounds. And now, I need your help... because all the ponies in this town think I'm crazy!

Sly Clop is a laid back slacker who runs one of Ponyville's only porn shops on Soresaddle Street. He is a regular customer of Hard Cider's "gentlecolt's club", the Knife and Apple, where he regularly shoots the breeze with Rainbow Dash, who's seen better days.

One day, his only employee quits, and he's forced to hire a new one, starting a new awkward relationship with Lyra, who needs cash. What follows is a lighthearted fic with dark undertones that I hope you'll enjoy.

And if I haven't convinced you enough by this point, no, this not a clopfic.

New cover image by mickf18 on deviantART (DeusExKane here).

I'm sure you've heard all about it by now. Rainbows and sunshine. Unhappy humans turning into happy ponies. Dancing and singing together in harmony, now and forever.

All of those stories you've heard, exaggerated. All those statistics and graphs, faked. Propaganda. Delusions.

They didn't tell the real story, what it was actually like. So, I've decided to write this book to record some of the truths that have been... glossed over.

My name is Matthew Roberts, and I'm the Mayor of New Hope. While my covering may have changed, I am still human.
This is the untold story of the Conversion. The one they never wanted to acknowledge.

Bon Bon's voice is funny, and that's about all that anypony who meets her notices, as her marefriend Lyra soon steals the spotlight with her explosive personality, strange obsessions, and curious beliefs. And why not? Bon Bon is, after all, a perfectly ordinary, boring pony in every way but two: her voice, and the carefully kept secret that she isn't really a pony.

(Edit:) Now with an annotated version, courtesy of the incomparable Shoggoth Lord!

In Equestria's far future, one thousand and five years after the return, a dysfunctional group of argumentative ponies must quest to defeat the most dangerous enemy of Equestria to ever live; the malevolent Lord Second, one of the only known members of the race of elder gods known as the humans, and the ancient cult who worships him, the Brotherhood of Man.

An over-the-top surrealist comedy, with slight serious elements. Expect a steady decline into insanity.

Cancelled, due to reasons of severe cranial trauma

Now with audio reading and prequel story, Shades of Grey, by Draven Eclipse.

Shining Armor and Cadence's spell reveals something completely unexpected as it expels Chrysalis and her changelings out of Canterlot: A secret kept from everypony for several years...

Now with a TV Tropes page! Warning: Will Contain spoilers.

After a mishap involving the Transportalponder, the Courier finds himself in a place he doesn't recognize. With no way back and nothing else to do, he decides that wandering into the nearest town is the best option. Being the Courier, things aren't that simple...

A Fallout: New Vegas/My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic crossover

The style alternates between omnipresent third-person and the Courier recounting his tale to... Well, take a guess.

Not so long ago, Equestria barely defeated two almost unstoppable creatures known as humans, which they called the Second and the First. Almost five years later, another one has shown up. The military takes up arms, the princesses are stricken with fear, and the Elements of Harmony assemble, ready for battle. But 'the Third' has no idea what's going on, and only wants to know how he came to be here, and how to get back home. Good questions indeed...But will he ever get his answers? Or will his predecessors' legacy catch up to him first?

“Side story/prequel to Human by DannyJ, but can be read on its own. Contains spoilers.”

He had done it. The giant demon that had masterminded the invasion of Earth was dead, and Hell was in shambles. All that was left was to backtrack through Hell and go home to help rebuild the ruined planet...
But of course, it's never that easy. Just one wrong turn, and he arrives from Hell itself into a land filled with pastel-colored ponies. How will the man who had just destroyed Hell adjust to the sudden peacefulness after all he had been through? And is Hell really destroyed for good?

I always wanted to go to Equestria. When I got the chance, I took the deal without reading the fine print. To my surprise, I didn't arrive there as a pony, or even as a human. It seems I get to view this world from a different perspective than what I've imagined.

My name is Echo. I am a Diamond Dog.

-Edited by the one, the only, Nathan Traveler!
-(Cover by Jovial_Shake of fimfiction.net)
-Now featured on Equestriadaily.com!