Ponification and Purification has occured. But is humankind really happy?
I'm sure you've heard all about it by now. Rainbows and sunshine. Unhappy humans turning into happy ponies. Dancing and singing together in harmony, now and forever.
All of those stories you've heard, exaggerated. All those statistics and graphs, faked. Propaganda. Delusions.
They didn't tell the real story, what it was actually like. So, I've decided to write this book to record some of the truths that have been... glossed over.
My name is Matthew Roberts, and I'm the Mayor of New Hope. While my covering may have changed, I am still human. This is the untold story of the Conversion. The one they never wanted to acknowledge.
Oh, I know. Rainbows and sunshine, happy ponies helping unhappy humans better themselves. Save humanity from itself by improving them. Pats on the back, as they cheer on each new convert. I've heard it all.
But have you?
So many exaggerated stories and articles .
All those faked statistics and graphs .
They don't tell the real story.
Of course, a few people were happy to go through with it. People that wanted to leave and start again. But they were a minority. A vast minority.
I was just a minor politician from good old Australia. Mid North Coast. No point mentioning which area, place wouldn't even exist anymore. Ever since the Purification, it's probably been reduced to nothing more than soil and grass.
Now? I'm a pegasus, shipped off to Equestria like every other poor sap. The big cleansing would have killed any intelligent life form, supposedly.
I'm writing this book to record some of the truths that have been... glossed over. Something to oppose all the propaganda coming from Celestia's government. Never been much of a writer before though, so don't expect miracles of prose.
However, this is important for me. For many of us. So please, bare with me.
My name is Matthew Roberts, and I'm the Mayor of New Hope.
While my body maybe that of a pony's, I am still human.
PAGE 1
Sighing, I dropped my pen to the table. My jaw ached something fierce, and the writing was damn near illegible. How ponies did this for hours on end, I'll never know. Not to mention my first real respite since the whole shitstorm began, and I spent it damaging my teeth on a steel pen.
The sound of approaching hooves on wooden floorboards drew my attention from the mess I'd written to the door, a flimsy thing banged together from two sheets of plywood. I knew who it would be. The bastard would be barging in right about...
"We need more housing", a voice bellowed as an orange hoof nearly put itself through the door trying to open it.
The bane of my existence, John Hemmings. An orange earth pony who used to be who-knows-what, probably some form of rodent. Kind of a self proclaimed assistant and helper, but didn't do much helping. Or assisting. Usually just brought bad news.
"How much?" I sighed once again, asking the same question I'd asked innumerable times before.
"Couple hundred at least."
"Do we have enough tents?" Another question I'd asked too many times.
"Nope. All being used." And an answer I'd received far too often. I didn't know why I even bothered getting my hopes up.
"Alright, alright. Get out the maps and come with me."
As he trotted over to fumble with the desk drawers, I moved over to the window of my office. Well, calling it an office was rather generous. It was more like four poorly sandpapered walls surrounding an ungodly mass of paper, maps and other miscellaneous junk I'd yet to throw out. There was a table though... somewhere.
Peering out through the glass, I spared a glance at the world outside. Building after building after building. Hundreds of thousands of 'New Foals', or what ever they were calling us now, lived here. All built up around this very house.
I'd been unable to live with them. The ponies that is. Something about them just rubbed me the wrong way. Never did find out exactly what. All I knew is I needed to get away from them and their naivety, their childishness. After a rather public yelling match with the mayor of the place, PonyTown or something, I left. Grabbed my things and walked off. Found this rather nice area to setup a home, and built a rather shabby shelter.
Nothing like the massive complexes the ponies had build around Equestria to house New Foals, usually called New Foal Centers. It was rickety, swaying in the wind, and had a rather leaky roof. Thankfully I'd chosen to be a pegasus, and managed to keep most of the weather off my new place.
The trouble I'd hoped to avoid started soon after. People noticed the shouting match. I can't recall exactly what it was about, some disagreement about Celestia's handling of humanity probably. Doesn't really matter. People noticed.
And it seemed many agreed with me.
Within a few days I had the first of many arrivals, about 20 people. Talking to them, they mentioned something about a feeling of wrongness about living amongst ponies, sounding eerily similar to myself. So I pointed them over to an area, and told them to knock themselves out. It's a free country. Probably. Never did get very far into looking at the various land laws.
Luckily for me, most of them were Earth Ponies. Strong as all get out, and had a green thumb a mile wide. They started up a small farm, mostly vegetables. After a few days I was already getting sick of grass, so was a nice change of pace.
That farm ended up being the first of dozens. Nearly every day, more and more travelers would come from the nearby New Foal Center. Either mentioning their distaste for the ponies, distaste for the laws, or distaste of Celestia. Brought their skills and trade, more workers for farms and other industries. Became quite a self sufficient little place. The name of New Hope began circling around, cliche as it was, and eventually it became official. About as official as a illegitimate half shanty town could get, anyway.
It was when this spontaneous community reached around five hundred that the trickle of New Foals became stronger. And from different directions. Seems word had spread about the whole shebang of humans living with humans under a human leadership. Leadership that had apparently become me. New people always got directed to me, and I'd point them in the right directions, so de-facto leader I became.
Five hundred people. One thousand people. Three thousand. Fifteen thousand. One hundred thousand. Two hundred thousand. More.
Thankfully, food production was never a problem. Being near half the size of a human, we ate less, and Earth Ponies grow crops at a ridiculously fast rate. Plus we didn't eat meat, so food was cheap and plentiful. Smaller size also meant smaller dwellings, so space wasn't too much of an issue. That and most of the pegasi ended up making cloud homes.
Policing, medical, and other city services had to be setup, and I'd ended up with many sleepless nights sorting though it all. Luckily, the whole 'Cutie Mark' thing tended to make it simpler. Place people with a 'Special Talent' for organization or leadership in charge, and let them sort through the mess.
Never thought a tattoo on someone's arse could be useful, but I guess you learn something new every day.
Over the months, it just kept getting larger. Farm land grew in one direction, housing grew in the other. Even now it was still growing. Been hearing rumors of other places starting up too, a mass exodus from the New Foal Centers setup around Equestria.
A yelp and a thump brought me from my memories, and I turned to find Hemming lying on the floor, nose first with the map between his jaws.
"Next time, you can get your own damn map", he groaned at me, a quick glare leveled in my direction. I wasn't going to ask, but I hazard a guess that he'd messed up some leg work. Not exactly an uncommon sight around here. Quickly helping him back to his feet, I made for the entrance.
"Come on, we've got work to do", I called back over my shoulder, silently wondering how I was going to screw up this time.
When ponies think about what happens within a Conversion Bureau, there are some pretty visible signs. A smile, two misty eyes, and a longing sigh.
The concept of helping those poor, down trodden humans become better. To hear the cheers of friends as each humans number is called. To see the grins on the new pony faces, as they wake up from their peaceful slumber, in a new, fresh body. Ready to make their place within Equestrian society.
Romantic, idealistic. And ultimately misguided.
For the first few months, this may have been true. When the poor, sick and depressed members of humanity came through, all the people happy to leave their troubles behind and begin a new life.
Once that river dried up, there was a drought.
See, many of humanity's ills had been exaggerated, in some places almost outright fabricated. There was no massive shortage of food, no diseases running rampant that couldn't be controlled.
Most of the trouble stemmed from lack of employment opportunities, leading to hefty unemployment, and ultimately, homeless. Around thirty percent if I recall correctly.
Which meant the remainder had no reason to convert.
This period of little to no activity at the Bureaus lasted for several years. And time ticked away as the countdown for Purification grew closer.
It was in the last six months before the pony-made armageddon when the dam finally broke. Time was running out, and with no answer to the requests, pleading, or even demanding of the ponies to stop it, people started caving in. It was "Convert or Die" time.
Millions of people streamed through, and nearly all were unhappy about leaving their lives and homes.
No longer was it cheering for their friends, but mourning for their past. No longer was it grins when they awoken, but tears and sobs. Suicide rates went through the roof, with newly converted ponies taking their own lives when they couldn't handle it.
It broke the ponies running the Bureaus. Ponies are almost childlike, innocent, even naive. Which is expected, coddled as they are by Celestia. And the cries, tears, and deaths killed them inside.
Each month would see a replacement team sent from Equestria, bright smiles and eager to help. They'd be drinking themselves unconscious every night within twenty days. Then they'd get shipped back to Equestria, the fresh batch would move in, and the vicious cycle continued.
Celestia made sure to keep this well hidden from Equestria. Keeping the media swamped with stories of happy, smiling converts, and pieces about families improving their quality of life.
Her PR team is the envy of every single politician, human or pony.
My own experience was one of the less pleasant ones. As one of the last in my city, I watched much of the horror run its course. I read all the reports, and saw it with my own two eyes. When it was my turn, I went with a cold heart. When I woke up, and lifted my hand to my face, I saw a green hoof. When I looked down my body, I found a pair of wings and the image of a rolled up scroll on my arse.
I cried myself to sleep that night.
PAGE 15
"Alright, talk to me," I demanded as I trudged up beside Hemmings, the orange Earth Pony almost bursting with glee. "What did you need me for?"
He swept one hoof across the city center square, towards a mass of people milling around, a mix of all three races, and his grin got wider. "Them!"
"What about them?" I sighed. I really didn't have enough time for theatrics.
"The new Militia!" I could swear he was nearly bouncing in place, like a kid about to get a lolly.
Rumors are nasty things. They burrow down into a community and take root, refusing almost any attempt to weed it out. And they could be anything, from some imagined perversion, to adultery.
During times of uncertainty and fear, they turn from harmless little fires, into raging infernos, wild and uncontrollable. And New Hope was no exception.
I turned back to the Earth Pony. "Is this about that rumor?"
"If you're referring to the one about Celestia sweeping in with her Royal Guard and bringing fire and brimstone, then yes" he replied, his eyes never leaving the to-be soldiers.
I nearly left a hoof shaped imprint in my forehead. "Oh, of all the stupid..."
That bloody rumor had been the bane of my existence for the last several weeks. Every day I'd have a multitude of worried people banging on my door, wanting answers, demanding action, and pleading for protection. Seems like someone had decided to take the matter into his own hands.
Of course, the rumors were completely absurd. I knew politics, and Celestia, while all-powerful when it came to Equestrian Law, was still bound by the one rule that bound us all. Good old public relations. She'd spent centuries bringing herself up as the peaceful, caring Princess of pony kind. I don't think Princess is even the right word. Mother would come closer.
Doing a one eighty and calling an attack on a city, that had done nothing other than exist, would damage her reputation for decades. And when that reputation would be with those she considers her children? Not going to happen.
Pity I couldn't get it into the thick skull's of the general populace.
A stray thought hit me. Peering at Hemmings, I asked, "I've got a question. What weapons are you giving them, and where did they come from?"
"I, uh... asked around the blacksmiths... and got some quotes... and then..." he chuckled nervously. It was the first change to his expression since I'd walked up beside him.
"You used City funds, without informing me?"
"Well... yes?" The grin was no longer filled with glee, being somewhere closer to guilt.
"Show me," I demanded, leveling a death glare at him.
He lead me over to one side of the square, where lines of tables stood. Sheets of cloth covered various lumps and bumps, and trotting up to one such table, he gripped the edge of a sheet and gave a tug.
Underneath were weapons of every size and make, all designed for pony bodies. Everything from wicked spikes attached to horseshoes, blades that appeared to fit to pegasi wings, to swords with a mouth grip, and even...
"Is that a rifle?!" I exclaimed, pointing to a rather suspicious looking steel tub with a strange device attached to it.
I didn't even need to turn around to know the gleam had returned to his eyes. "Yep! It's fully designed to be held and aimed with hooves, and this is how you fire it!" he pointed towards a mouth grip attached horizontally to the buttstock, an oversized trigger poking out from it. "Hold it in your mouth, and pull the trigger with your tongue. Fits perfectly when held in a shoulder held firing position. Ingenious huh?"
I didn't know whether to be impressed or depressed.
"So what about armor?"
Quickly, the Earth Pony turned to another row of tables on the opposite side of the square, also covered with cloth. "Over there. Full plate armor for the Earth Ponies, stuffs about a inch thick. Pegasi and Unicorns can't even lift it, so we've got light chainmail for them. All with an undercoat of kevlar." Inch thick steel Full plate? How much was this costing?
On second thoughts, I didn't really wish to know. Not until I had a stiff drink handy.
"We've got enough weapons for fifty men so far," he continued, "Only ten rifles so far though, since they're being made by hand. Plus they're crude as hell, and only bolt action, so they're going to be supplementary weapons to those who prove excellent shots."
"Anything else to go with this?" He'd gotten it this far, and already spent the money. Might as well learn how far down the rabbit hole my assistant had run.
This time, he did bounce. "This is the best part! We've started training the pegasi to use weather manipulation for battle, and the unicorns are practicing combat spells!"
By now, I had a near ecstatic orange pony face pressing up against my own, unamused, one.
I sighed again. It seemed to be something I was doing all too often. Both Hemmings and I knew there was no basis to the 'Celestia-geddon' rumor. And fifty men, who still tripped over their own feet in four-legged bodies they'd received a year ago, would do jackshit against the might of the Royal Guard. Not to mention this might just spin up the rumor mill further, as though I'd found out something to prepare for.
However, it would get the populace off my arse. That and Hemmings was on the verge of creaming his metaphorical pants over the idea.
I turned and jogged off, waving a dismissive hoof into the air. "Okay, do it. Just keep them under control. I don't need a bunch of armed thugs, on top of everything else, to deal with!" Looking back over my shoulder, I fixed an eye on the Earth Pony. "Oh, and Hemmings?"
"Yeah?"
"Take money from the coffers again without telling me, I'll sell you off for glue."
Equestria is a pretty big place, and most would just describe it as huge. Some strange ambient magic gives it a 'bigger on the inside' effect, and if you remember the old Doctor Who series, you'll know what I'm talking about.
From the outside, it appears to be roughly a quarter the size of Australia. Yet when stepping upon it's shores, you'll find it's grown over fifteen times larger. That puts it at well over the size of Africa.
Freaky stuff.
Yet even with that much space, it would not be able to house over eleven billion people. Not even with multi-layering the entire countryside. (For ponies not in the know about 'Multi-layering', it's a term to refer to building an entire second city suspended over the top of another city.) So what happened to those who didn't make it?
Many heavily religious countries refused entry to ponies, generally on grounds of being 'unnatural' or 'against God/Allah/whatever'. Heavily corrupt governments also seemed to go in this direction, though I suspect it was more to keep control of what they had. The only people that got converted from these backgrounds were those that fled.
This lead to many humans being cut off from access to said chance. The majority in fact. When that's a majority of eleven billion, the end result won't be pretty.
And it wasn't. The Purification was the largest scale genocide to have been seen in human history, approximately eleven billion reduced to two and a half.
Pretty difficult to swallow.
Especially hard when many ponies cheered as it happened. Celestia kept them happy with the thoughts that all of humanity had been converted, and that two and a half billion was the total of human population. Concealing the horrible truth's of reality from a child, much like a mother would.
That, coupled with the pony population only reaching just over one billion, it proves difficult to convince them that was a mere fraction of the total.
Humanity mourned as Ponykind celebrated.
PAGE 41
As engrossed in writing as I was, I never heard the hoofsteps approaching, and my first sign that I had a visitor was the orange hoof hitting my door. With a resounding crack, the appendage sent pieces of splintered wood throughout my office from the force of the impact.
"..." A single eye peered through the new hole, past his own lodged foreleg, "Uh, sorry?"
He'd forgotten his strength again, though it came as little surprise. The amount of furniture new Earth Ponies went through kept the carpenters very happy. At least they tended not to injure themselves like pegasi, our first instinct being to take to the skies when frightened. And without growing up with those instincts they're rather difficult to control, as the brand new bruise on my noggin where my skull impacted the ceiling attested to.
"You're paying for a new door," I groaned. Picking myself up from where I'd fallen, I moved over to the entrance, glaring back at him through the impromptu peephole. "Was there something you needed?"
"Yea, there's a VIP visitor from Ponyville to see you," he replied, grunting as he attempted to dislodge his now stuck leg. "As in really important."
That's all I needed, more politics. I already had a headache from hitting the roof.
"Alright, shoot. Who?"
"One Twilight Sparkle."
Well... Shit.
When this city started up, and was actually capable of being considered a city, I began doing my homework on Equestria. Laws (Finally got around to looking at those land laws), government, and the various who's who. One name that repeatedly turned up was Twilight Sparkle. Unicorn Prodigy, Personal Student of Celestia, Most Faithful and Trusted of Celestia, Savior of Luna, and most commonly, Heroine. All informal titles attributed to the young mare.
What worried me most was that it appeared Celestia had really taken notice of us. We'd had a few representatives show up, of course, however they were nobody's in the big scheme of things. Sent from small towns, cities, and the New Foal Centers surrounding us. Usually asking to come back 'home'. Told them they're free to ask the people themselves, it's their choice. Went about as well as anyone would imagine, either laughed out, or thrown out by security if they got pushy.
This was different though. This one held the ear of Celestia and Luna themselves, in a way that very few ever had. Having the attention and full trust of just one Princess was considered rare in Equestria. Having both was completely unheard of.
Truth be told, Miss Twilight was one of the most powerful ponies in Equestria, both magically and politically, to have ever lived.
Of course, I wasn't happy with her turning up out of the blue. Nobody would. But when someone this important shows up, you can't simply tell them to come back tomorrow and get some manners.
Well, let's get it over with.
"Alright, this is what I need you to do..."
* * *
It was an hour later when we arrived at the restaurant. I'd hired out their private hall, so we could have some privacy and reduced noise pollution, and still have proper food and service.
Twilight Sparkle, a purple unicorn with some sort of purple star as a cutie mark, had shown up with no less than six Royal Pegasus Guards. On her sides were saddlebags, filled with what appeared to be a book, parchment and writing utensils, and riding upon her back, her purple and green Draconian assistant, Spike.
Didn't look much like a dragon, to be honest. But I'd heard of what they were capable of, and even a baby was not to be trifled with. Jaws and claws that could shred diamond like a scalpel through skin, and hide with scales acting like four inch plate armour. And that's not mentioning the whole fire breath deal.
With me I had Hemmings and six members of our own Militia, two of each race. My assistant had done a remarkably good job on weeding out thugs, and by now the Police had been absorbed by the Militia, acting as both, reaching about four thousand members.
I still made sure to keep a close eye on them.
Having sent the twelve soldiers to keep the hall secure, as the last thing anyone needed was some lunatic attempting 'revenge' on an Equestrian, we sat at the table, Twilight and Spike opposite Hemmings and I. As the first course was being served, the time to get down to business began.
"I'm sure this isn't just a casual visit, Miss Sparkle. What brings you to our little city?" I asked, folding my hooves as I picked at the salad. No tomato's though, made sure of that. Disgusting things.
"Well, I have been been writing an in depth report for Princess Celestia on New Foals and how they're getting along in Equestria, when the Princess suggested I come here and have a look first hoof." Smiling brightly, her horn glowed as she levitated the thick tome from her bags, opening it before me. Sure enough, the pages were filled with statistics and graphs, seemingly all about us. "So, here I am!"
Inwardly, I sighed. Celestia was definitely getting herself involved now, something I'd been dreading for a while. Nodding slowly, I gave in to her request.
"Very well, what do you want to know?"
Almost quivering with excitement, she turned to her assistant. "Spike! Take notes, please." Receiving a nod from her rather silent partner, she spun back around. "First off, I'd like to get some details about your city here. Population and other information, like city facilities."
"I believe this might be my area of expertise," Hemmings interjected, bringing a hoof up to wipe his mouth clean with a cloth. "We have around two million people living here. Medical and policing has been setup to a satisfactory level, and while we have decent plumbing, it is mostly public and needs improvement, which is ongoing."
The purple unicorn nodded, her eerily intense gaze locked onto the earth pony as her little friend scratched away at a piece of parchment. With a quill of all things. I knew they had pencils, so why was the dragon using something as archaic as a quill and ink pot? I didn't want to possibly offend by asking though.
A sheet of parchment levitated out of one of her bags, coming to a stop just before the unicorn's face, her eyes flickering about its surface. "Within the last six years, since this city was founded, a mass exodus of New Foals have left the New Foal Centers setup around Equestria, heading towards over a hundred communities that have popped up. Approximately two hundred million, with tens of thousands more leaving each day." Lowering the sheet to peer over it, she watched my face carefully. "Why?"
Maybe because many people see Celestia as having committed genocide? I couldn't say it out loud, as I really didn't wish to insult or anger her. We wanted the Equestrians to leave us alone, not poke them with a stick to see if they'll bite. The smart ones at least, some people just wanted to 'Kill 'em all!'.
"I guess it comes down to old human pride," I replied, putting on my diplomacy face. "We wish to be the masters of our future, with our own laws, culture and countries." It wasn't exactly a lie, as I got the feeling that the population did want that.
The mare's head tilted slightly in confusion. "Laws and culture? Aren't you happy with Equestrian laws?" She asked.
"Truth be told, no. I, and many of those living here, are upset with Equestria's rather strict regulation regarding things like alcohol and recreational drugs. There are quite a few others, and I don't really have the time to go into each and every -"
"Wait, alcohol? Like beer and wine?" She interrupted, looking even more confused than before. "I thought that the consumption limit had been raised only a few years back?"
"Exactly that. You have a consumption limit. Equestria has too many laws trying to make it the perfect place, in turn infringing on an individuals freedom," I said, jabbing a hoof in her direction pointedly.
"But it's for everypony's safety! Excess consumption leads to side effects, and then to problems within society. And it's not like you can just ignore the law, not when they're set down by the Princesses!" Twilight exclaimed, a hard edge forming in her eyes.
"We can and will!"
"You WHAT!?" She looked like I'd walked around the table and slapped her. "You can't ignore the law! Not while you're in Equestria!"
By this point, we were half yelling at one another across the table, and quickly proceeding to full on screaming. I was vaguely aware of Spike and Hemmings getting up and heading out the door.
"Well, we're not exactly here by choice now are we!?" I retorted, slamming my hooves onto the table, my rarely used wings flaring in anger.
She hit the table with her own forelimbs, yelling back, "We saved humankind!"
The situation, unsurprisingly enough, rapidly devolved at that point.
* * *
I lay back on my bed, staring up at the ceiling, and sighed.
Politics. One of the few things that can get almost any two humans, no matter how close, to come nearly to blows. And apparently it was just the same across the the pond. Our screaming had, eventually, gotten the attention of our respective assistants, who ended up having to physically drag us from each others metaphorical throats.
I had gone into the meeting intended to try and keep the peace, and just give her vague answers to what she wanted to know. Get her to leave me to more important work, without riling anything up.
But I went and let my emotions get the better of me. Aimless frustrations over everything that happened, had finally found a target in Miss Sparkle.
A soft knocking to my door got my attention, and after releasing one last, enjoyable sigh, spoke up, "Come in."
Hemmings opened the entrance, just enough to fit his head through. "You alright there, boss?" He asked. The man only ever called me 'boss' when he was nervous, so I guess the screaming match had him worried.
I barked a humorless laugh, shaking my head. "Not really, but I'll live."
"Anything I should know about?"
Grunting, I pulled myself upright, stretching my cramped wings out. They seemed to hate it when I lay on my back.
"Get the militia ready for riot control. According to Miss Sparkle, Celestia's going to be paying a visit soon, in person."
I've interviewed and spoken with many people concerning the Conversion, but answers to the big questions are always sparse. The "Who, What, Why , When and How".
Many of the politicians that pushed for the agreement with Equestria have done a surprisingly good job of vanishing into thin air. Likely converted themselves and fled, new names and all, fearing retaliation. No one knows, and in the absence of knowledge, conspiracy theories fill the gaps.
Anything from "It was an expansionism move by the ponies", to "That human leaders had been paid", to "The leaders were transformed ponies, working for years behind the scenes".
With the Government influenced media having turned itself into full attack mode on organizations disagreeing with it, even the most outlandish claims aren't hard to believe. The Human Liberation Front (HLF) was one such organization, and as you may know, was hit the hardest. Despite what the media would have you believe, they weren't some shadowy organization hell bent on the eradication of ponies. They wanted what everyone wanted. Peace.
But a peace where humanity existed.
Their beginnings were quite benign. Protests and petitions, the usual light civil disobedience. Despite the soft handed tactics, they'd been demonized, called everything from 'Terrorists' to 'Human Supremest'. Of course, once things became clear that peaceful action wasn't going to change anything, things started getting nasty. Espionage, sabotage and assassinations became commonplace, and with HLF leadership and organization already in place, it became the natural leader.
Another commonly asked question is, if the situation really was as bad as it was claimed, why didn't the ponies help before hand? Ponies had been around for centuries, and while humankind never stepped foot upon their strange little island, them living amongst humans in human cities was hardly an uncommon occurrence.
So, why now? I'd never heard of any talks between Celestia and other countries to assist in fixing the apparent 'problems', and neither had anyone else I'd talked too, including many other politicians. Either those meetings were held under the tightest of security and secrecy, or they simply never happened.
The only fact we can be sure of is that, bar the top of Equestrian Government or the now vanished human government, no one knows what really went on.
And they're not talking.
PAGE 58
Even from where I was, standing just outside the doors to the newly opened City Hall, the noise was almost deafening.
Tens of thousands of people swarmed the streets in every direction, shouting and hollering, screaming out slogans, and blasting on anything that would make a sound. Between us and the roaring crowd, nearly the entirety of the seven thousand strong militia stood strong, holding them back with shields and bodies. Earth Ponies held the line, taking the brunt with their armored hides and stout bodies, backed up by Unicorn casters armed with sleeping spells and force fields. Above us the Pegasi darted through the air, spinning and twisting, keeping us safe from aerial assailants.
I'd been hoping to keep this visit on the low down, but the cat appeared to have slipped from it's bag. Luckily, the majority of the protestors seemed quite content to just make noise, and not outright attack.
"Hemmings! How much longer until she's supposed to get here?!" I yelled, almost screamed, to be heard over the noise, turning to face my assistant.
"Just a few minutes! I've got a group of Pegasi ready to assist escorting her in!" He hollered back. Looking at the gathered protestors, he shook his head. "This is insane, I don't think I've ever seen a crowd this angry!"
"Think about it! The last time their leaders got cosy with Celestia, they ended up royally screwed! They don't want it to happen again!" After everything that had happened over the last several years, I couldn't bring myself to blame them. Hell, I'd have joined in myself if it wasn't my job to keep everything running.
"Well it's not helping anyone at the moment, so..." Something in the distance seemed to catch his attention. "Hold on, I think I see her carriage now!"
Following the direction of his hoof, I peered off in the general direction of Canterlot. Even at this distance, I could make out the flying formation. One hundred pure white Pegasi, encased in their enchanted golden armor, flanking a single chariot. Didn't need to be a smart man to know what was in there.
Before I could formulate a reply, Hemmings leapt to his feet and ran over to a group of lightly armored Pegasi, apparently on a break from sky patrol. A series of flurried signals from the orange Earth Pony had the group up and back in the air, making a bee line towards the incoming Royal Guard. With a satisfied nod, he quickly trotted back over to me.
"They'll help keep the Pegasi protestors at bay, and give instructions to land her here!" He shouted to me, making a gesture to the grassy area in front of the Hall.
It was only a few moments more before members of the crowd spotted Celestia's carriage for themselves, their shouts and pointing bringing it to the attention of others.
If I thought the noise was bad before, it had nothing on the new volume.
Very few protesting Pegasi actually dared to approach the Royal Guards formation, thankfully, opting instead to follow behind at a distance and shouting, and those that did quickly got chased away. They peeled off when it entered the restricted airspace setup by the Militia, allowing the the Goddess's chariot to come to rest on the grass.
"Alright, lets get this over with." I sighed, glancing over at Hemmings, making sure he was at my side for this. His face looked a bit like mine probably did, worried and intimidated.
Squaring my shoulders, I quickly made my way over to the vessel. It was massive, clearly designed for something far larger than the average pony, and enclosed with tinted windows running along the sides. One of many technologies that came from humankind.
Its door was quickly opened by one of her Royal Guards, and a massive white figure appeared in the opening. Tall and graceful, with an almost otherworldly mane that billowed in its own strange version of physics, and possessing both a horn and wings.
Princess Celestia. Supreme Ruler of Equestria.
No one was really sure exactly what she was. Guesses ranged from a mortal pony with amazing gifts, to a literal deity, to anywhere in between. All I knew was that she was beyond anything mankind had ever seen. Many assassination attempts had been made on her life, as well as her sister's, most of which were in the last few years just before the Purification. Everything from poison to bombs, and none had succeeded.
That wasn't to say they'd been foiled, as quite a few attempts went to plan. It simply did nothing to her. Poison she ate without hesitation, showing no ill effects no matter the dosage. More than once an explosive had detonated under her feet, leaving a smoking crater with a very surprised looking mare standing at the bottom. Bullets, everything from tiny peashooters to giant anti-materiel rifles, did nothing and just bounced off her coat.
A creature alive since before recorded history, and could shrug off weapons designed to incapacitate even the heaviest of armored vehicles. For all intents and purposes, a Goddess. And I got to meet her face to face. Joy.
Of course I'd been mentally prepping myself, ever since Miss Sparkle had left in such a huff, but nothing could have prepared me for this. Even without a horn of my own, I could feel the power rolling off of her in waves, like an aura that just screamed 'I'm in charge'. Never in my life had I ever felt so... small, a mere insect before her.
If the audible gulp that came from his direction was any indication, Hemmings felt it just as strongly.
"Your Majesty!" I shouted over the din, trying to keep my fear from showing on my face. "This is an honor! Welcome to New Hope!"
Peeking over her shoulder, Celestia pointedly looked at the protesters amassed in the streets and air before turning back to me with a raised eyebrow. "Quite a warm welcome indeed."
Oh, this wasn't going to be fun.
* * *
It took everything I had not to fidget nervously as I sat at my desk, across from the white Alicorn as she settled herself in. It was one of those times when everything you had planned and rehearsed just vanishes in the face of the cold truths of reality, or in this case, the face of a living Goddess. It didn't take long before I broke the silence.
"I... I apologise, Your Majesty." Mentally I drove a fist into my face. First word out of my mouth and I was already stuttering. "We attempted to... to keep this under wraps, but somehow it... it got out and I have no - " A raised golden encased hoof quickly put a pause to my ramblings, her eyes never leaving mine and her face completely emotionless.
"I am well aware of the discontent amongst the New Foal population, Mr Roberts," she began, "As well as their opinion on myself."
"Then, uh... may I ask, why are you here? Um... If you don't mind, that is." No stuttering that time. I was improving.
"You appear to be the leader, or at least the originator, of this exodus from the centers." Still she'd not changed her expression. I'd be lying if I said it didn't scare the piss out of me. "I'm here to get an understanding of why you started it."
"I started it?" I repeated, confused, "I didn't really intend to start anything. I was, well... unhappy with the current arrangements, and decided to go out on my own."
"Then why is there...?" Celestia left the sentence unfinished, but a pointed look through the window left no question as to what she was referring.
"They followed me. They just decided that because I was here first that they'd ask me what to do, and it just snowballed from there!" I really didn't want to be here, not with her.
She paused, briefly considering me. "Then I guess the bigger question, Mr Roberts, is for what reason are they here? Why are you here? I had originally sent Twilight Sparkle to inquire about it, but it seems you both rubbed one another the wrong way."
"I'm... I guess I'm here - "
"And I insist on your honesty. I will be rather displeased otherwise."
There was a very real threat left unspoken there, and I damn near lost control of my bladder. I'm not ashamed to say she terrified me. Sitting up, muscles tense and quivering in fear, I started blurting out everything that came to mind.
"I dislike Equestria, I hate Equestrian laws, I feel uneasy around Equestrians and I don't want to live under you!" Inside, I was begging her not to kill me.
"And this is shared between all who reside here?" Still, her expression never changed.
"I - I think so. It's the most common answers to why they - they've followed me," I stammered.
Many long, tense moments passed, just me stiff as a board, and Celestia staring at me. Thankfully, it came to an end as she sighed, clenching her eyes closed and muttering, "It wasn't supposed to happen this way."
"I... I'm sorry?" I asked, confused. Whatever she was referring to escaped me.
"Never mind," She replied curtly, her impeccable poker face returning, as she stood and quickly made her way to the door. "I'm sorry for the interruptions, I'll leave you to your business." She was leaving?
The sudden, and rather jarring, dismissal came as quite a shock. My reputation in New Hope had taken a sharp hit ever since word of this meeting had gotten out. Not to mention the time and man hours spent by the militia doing their utmost to keep the mass protesting from turning into mass rioting. Then there was the huge cost of it all, the extra pay for the extra hours all those men and women spent protecting the City Hall. All for under five minutes of questioning that made little sense to me?
"Excuse me, Your Highness?" I shouted after her, my shock quickly giving way to indignation. I wanted to know what the hell was going on. "What was the purpose of this? I'm a very busy man, and this time and effort could have been spent on -"
She jerked her head around, looking back at me over her shoulder, and glared. Her eyes, no longer the overly large eyes of a pony, were replaced with pure flame, tongues of fire flickering up towards her mane. The temperature within my office rose to sweltering heights, and as she opened her mouth, her breath distorted the air with searing heat.
"The purpose is none of your concern, New Foal. Do not overstep your position."
I never actually saw her leave, hiding as I was behind my desk, but the drop in temperature informed me of her departure. Peeking up over the ridge of the wooden furniture, double checking her absence, I noted where the paint covering the walls had warped and melted. Scorch marks marred the floors surface, thin wisps of smoke still lazily trailing into the air. Half my office was in dire need of repainting, and as the icing on the cake, the unpleasant odor of urine hit my nostrils.
Sighing, I stood, quickly looking for a towel, or at least something capable of soaking up liquids. Maybe with her gone, everything could return to normal.
Despite what many humans believe, all three of the Pony Tribes have powerful magic. The only difference is how their bodies utilize it, which I find can be easiest explained by the concept of External Usage and Internal Usage. To make sure everyone is on the same page (I'm well aware of how little most humans read about Equestria), I've paraphrased from the New Foals Guide To Equestria:
Unicorns have mostly External Usage, channeling their thoughts into actions via the horn. It shapes the world, allowing them to lift and handle objects with a dexterity that no Earth Pony or Pegasus could ever hope to match, and allows them to cast spells that defy physics. Their small amount of internal magic makes them sensitive to all magic, allowing them to feel how it's used around them.
Pegasi have equal External and Internal Usage. Their Internal allows them to fly, and protects them from the incredible speeds they're capable of, the average pegasus reaching and exceeding 400 Kmph's. This is balanced with their External, giving them the ability to control clouds and weather. This even allows them to anchor clouds to a point on the ground below, creating a stationary mass that can be used to create the iconic 'Cloud Home'.
An Earth Pony's magic is almost completely Internal, supporting their physical bodies to increase their strength and durability. Diseases that could easily kill a unicorn barely give a sniffle to a healthy Earth Pony, and weights that a pegasi's lighter body would strain to even lift can be flung clear across a field. Their small amount of External magic seeps into the ground and living things close to them, enhancing growth and vitality, leading them to be exceptional farmers and nurses.
All ponies, between the ages of 3 months and 2 years, go through random, uncontrollable spurts of this magic. Unicorn foals will cast random spells, or fling nearby objects through the air. Pegasi will fly, bouncing around the house and out windows. Earth Ponies will suffer from uncontrollable bursts of strength, breaking objects by accident. But as they grow, their bodies learn to control and suppress it.
This suppression lasts up until a few years before puberty, usually around the ages of 8 or 9, allowing the young pony to properly learn control and restraint. This restraint is something that New Foals lack. The issue is compounded by adult New Foals having the magic capabilities of an full grown pony.
Bodies brimming with magical power, with no concept of control.
Because of this, at least 50% of the current patients in New Hope hospitals are admitted with some form of injury from this lack of control. Burns from errant spells, head trauma from startled pegasi and broken bones from friendly slaps on the shoulder are just a few examples I could give.
PAGE 89
Flying was always a bit of a conundrum for me. I'd specifically chosen to become a Pegasus for the freedom of flight, for that wonderful ability to travel long distances under my own power. Nowhere was off limits when you possessed your own set of wings, blasting across the sky at speeds that would make even the fastest Bullet Trains green with envy.
Pity, then, that I quickly found out how much I hated leaving the ground.
So it was with great relief that I touched down just outside a fenced off, nondescript building on the outskirts of New Hope. An unassuming house, brown paint and single story, and from the outside appearing completely devoid of activity. However if you knew where to look, like I did, you'd find watchful eyes peering out from the windows of nearby buildings. As I approached the door it was opened by an Earth Pony standing inside, one of many all garbed in the heavy plate armor of the Militia.
It was an endless source of amusement just how much Equestria valued it's tradition, and their Royal Guard was no exception. Made up of remnants of the original militarism of the Pegasi Tribe, the Guard was nearly entirely filled with Pegasi, with only the most skilled Unicorns taking the remaining places.
Worked great outdoors, where a pegasus could dart around through the air and only engage on their terms, but once inside a pegasus was pretty much grounded. An Earth Pony without the advantages. Tradition really was a stupid thing, though I guess it didn't really matter when you had two deities to defend against serious threats.
The inside of the house was the complete opposite of the unassuming exterior, with a heavy metal gate shortly past the entrance barring entry to a huge steel construct. Almost a bunker built within the confines of the misleading building. At the moment it was opened in advance for my arrival, and past it I could see stairs leading down underground, and halls leading off to offices. Once the doors were securely closed behind me, I turned to the nearest guard.
"Where's Mr. Hemmings? He said he had something I needed to see," I asked. It always amazed me whenever I saw a militia Earth Pony. They looked closer to an armored vehicle than a living creature.
"He's on level two, in the High Security area," He replied, pointing towards the stairs.
This got me curious. If it was locked away in there, then it had to be big. Giving my thanks, I proceeded down the stairwell.
It was an idea Hemmings had thrown my way a few years back, a kind of secret lab. Simple building with an entrance to an underground research area. I'd honestly thought he'd been reading too many spy books, but I gave the go ahead anyway. Somewhere to do our own research on pony magic, something we had very little actual knowledge of. We didn't want Equestria's concepts of how it worked, we needed our own.
In hindsight, the 'Villain's Secret Lab' idea had worked out nicely, and had given me some peace of mind over a publicly known one. Especially after the Celestia incident.
I shivered at the memory of that particular meeting, not really wanting to remember the vision of an angry Celestia, her eyes aflame with a voice that echoed inside my head. I think she still blamed me for the exodus, despite my claims to the contrary. Her plan for the future had been shattered, and I was someone who she could point her frustrations at.
At least that was my theory.
Whether true or not, this little lab let New Hope conduct research without worrying about her finding out.
The facility consisted of long, well lit hallways, broken only by large windows along each wall, allowing a good view into the various rooms. This was just the low security stuff, so the need for secrecy was minimal. Many of the rooms at this time of day were occupied, people studying everything from enchantment to magic spells, for everyday use or combat.
A loud crack from one room in particular caught my attention. Through the window, I could see a blue Pegasus repeatedly kicking a small cloud inside a metal cage. Each strike was punctuated by a clap of lightning streaking from the black roiling mass to the steel bars, the silence between each bolt filled with the scratching of pens against paper from the half dozen Unicorns sitting a safe distance away. Science at its best, loud noises and pretty lights.
"I was wondering when you'd show up."
Turning, I was met with the face of Hemmings, the orange Earth Pony briskly walking towards me from deeper within the facility. Immediately I noticed something off about him, his mouth pressed into a grim line, eyebrows furrowed. An expression I'd almost never seen on him before.
"Middle of a meeting, took a while to get away," I grunted in return, "so what was so important you had to have a messenger interrupt it?"
He shook his head, "No, not here. This is big, and I'm not risking talking about it until we're in private."
If I thought he looked overly serious before, by now I almost couldn't recognize him. He'd never been one for taking anything without at least a little bit of a smarmy attitude, and it was actually beginning to freak me out.
"Alright, lead the way."
* * *
As I seated myself on a cushion in front of his desk, I couldn't help but be filled with apprehension. He'd never been a worrisome man, preferring to let things just happen and go along for the ride. So to have him order two guards to stand outside the door, out of earshot, and to not let anyone within ten meters of the door...
"Hemmings, I'm going to be blunt. What the hell has gotten into you? You look like you're about to have a heart attack!"
He shook his head before reaching underneath his desk, coming back up with a flask with a stopper in his teeth. Setting in upon the table surface, he stared mutely at it for a few moments, looking pensive.
"It's this stuff," he finally spoke, pointing towards the murky red liquid inside with his muzzle. "After years of work, we managed to finish it."
"Hemmings, focus. Cut out the dramatization and tell me," I sighed, hoping to get to the chase, my busy schedule flying past in my head. The meeting with the Schooling Board, a meeting with the Sanitation Board, another meeting with -
"It's Anti-Conversion Formula."
- the new Electricity... Anti-Conversion? It took a few seconds for the words to click in my head.
"WHAT?!"
The Earth Pony almost threw himself over the desk to cram a hoof into my mouth, hissing in a low voice, "Be quite, or someone will hear you!"
Holy shit. Holy shit. He'd managed to... to...
"How the hell did you make this?" I whispered back.
"I didn't. My team I'd had working on it did. We managed to snag a bunch of samples of the Conversion Formula from a dump site, then they set about reverse engineering it, and finding out how to produce it ourselves."
I just kept staring at the flask like it was a live snake. No wonder he had been so worked up before. If this got out to... Oh shit!
"How many people know about this!? Celestia can not find out!" I was having trouble keeping my volume down, being the nervous wreak that I was at that moment. She was already furious at me, and I honestly couldn't say what she would do if this became known.
"Why do you think we're underground for, with this security and secrecy?" He scoffed, rolling his eyes, "As for those who know? Just you, me, ten scientists and two guards."
Taking deep breaths to calm myself down, I finally managed to get my jumbled thoughts together. "Hemmings, how would this even work? The entire world is flooded with magic, and turning back would be assured death."
The Earth Pony just shook his head. "Where do you think our magic came from? They didn't just change our physical bodies, then POOF, magic appears. The original formula had to do both, separately. This," he nodded towards the flask, "just affects the physical body, leaving the magic to protect us."
A smile, almost a maniacal grin, finally stretched itself across his face.
"We did it, man! It's past all testing we could possibly manage without actually using it! When we leave Equestria, we can become human again!"
Consciousness returned slowly, my mind fuzzy and murky as I came back to reality. Dizziness flowed in waves over me, making my head spin nauseatingly.
Where was I? What was going on?
Trying to answer those questions by opening my eyes proved a folly, and were quickly shut as bright lights seared into my retina. Pausing to take stock of the situation, I concentrated on what little I could make out. What felt like a soft mattress sat below me, and thick blankets wrapped themselves tightly around my body. From somewhere nearby a constant beeping irritated my ears.
Grunting with the effort required to move sleep stiffened muscles, I stretched out and grabbed at the covers, feeling the freshly washed cloth between my fingers. As nice and cosy as it was, the extra layers of cloth proved too warm, so with a flick of my wrist I threw them to the side.
Many moments passed as I lay there, letting my mind catch up to reality, trying to work out why everything seemed so... strange. Strange, but in a good way. Like a cast being removed from a previously broken leg. Drumming my fingers on the bed spread, I -
Fingers?
Bolting upright, ignoring the painful throbbing from my head and eyes, I stared at my hand. My hand. Five digits, four fingers, one thumb, palm and wrist.
Like tiny hammers, memories flooded into my head. The press release, the speeches, reporters, flashing of camera's. Snippets of questions came to mind.
"Mr. Roberts, how does it feel to be the first to go through?"
"Will you be releasing any more details of the process, at this time?"
"Has there been any statement made by the Equestrians?"
Gazing past my hand, I took in the room around me. Sparsely furnished, the bright white room consisted of the bed I had been sleeping upon, a desk covered in papers and documents, and what seemed to be a medical cart. The cart appeared to be where the consistent beeping came from, a heart rate monitor if I had to hazard a guess.
And below me, stretched out on the mattress, I saw a body. My body. My human body. It was a bit older than I remembered, but it was to be expected. Had been a good while since I'd last seen it.
The heavy wooden door creaked open. and a brown unicorn poked his head through the gap. Spotting me, he softly smiled, looking relieved.
"Oh thank goodness, you're finally awake." Turning around, he shouted to someone behind him, "Mr. Hemmings!? He's up!" Smiling once more towards me, he said, "He'll be here shortly. Now, you've been out for four days, so I shoul -"
The unnamed Unicorn never got to finish, as a orange blur barreled past him, knocking the half open door off its hinges. Immediately I was set upon by the frantic Earth Pony, leaping around the bed and launching rapid fire questions.
"Oh boss, you're up! Are you ok? How are you feeling? Does anything hurt!? You weren't supposed to be unconscious for that long! Please tell me nothing hurts! We need to get the - "
Reaching over, I closed my hand around his muzzle, silencing any further inquiries. Taking a moment to gather my thoughts, I noted just how small he seemed. Everything seemed smaller, in truth.
"I feel... fine. I think it worked." I replied.
Two glistening eyes, and a radiant smile was my only answer.
* * *
Ever since I'd set foot upon the stage, the reporters had never once let up with the flash photography. Star's filled my eyes, almost blinding me to the crowd filling the streets, a sea of mishmashed colors. To either side of the mass of citizens, huge buildings stood proud, some up to four stories high already. A testament to all the hard work and dedication of everyone within the city.
Rearing onto his hind legs, Hemmings was giving his speech, mostly filled with the more technical details of the Anti-Conversion Formula. Never being much for science, I tuned most of it out. Not like it made any sense to me.
"...now, if you would, Mr. Roberts has a few words to say."
The mention of my name jerked me from my half dozed state, and I quickly stood, taking my place at the podium. Clearing my throat, I looked down at the cue cards in my hand.
"My friends, today marks a new, wondrous beginning for Humanity," I began, speaking into the microphone set before me, my voice reverberating through multiple loudspeakers. "Fifteen years ago, we were brought to our knees, forced into extinction by the actions of a few. We may never know what exactly transpired to cause this turn of events, nor may we ever know who. But despite all odds, I stand here before you, once more as a human being. As living proof that we are not yet finished."
"We survived the Cold War, when a push of a single button would have reduced Humankind to ash. We survived World War Three, when a push of a button would have vaporized the surface of the planet! And we, as a species, have now survived the Ponyfication!"
The crowd roared, cheers and whistles filling the air, stamping the ground with their hooves sending vibrations through the surface of the stage. Holding up a hand to request silence, I gave it a moment to die down.
"However, I am aware that after such a long time, there will be those who would rather not return to their human form. We have no desire, nor intent, to force anything upon those who have no wish to change. For all those who are interested, clinics will be setup to help ease you back to your old self."
"For now, though, may we celebrate this day away, upon this momentous occasion. Thanks to the tireless efforts of the scientists you see behind me, Humankind will live again! And thank all of you watching today for all your effort. Without your support, and hard toil, we would never have gotten back onto our feet. You have placed your trust in us, and I hope that we continue to live up to your expectations."
Fifteen years ago the species Homo Sapiens, commonly known as Man, was rendered extinct. Either killed, or changed. Only in mind and soul did we live on.
For ten years, we were confined to living within Equestria's borders, as the purification would kill any sentient life form. Supposedly.
Five years ago, we left Equestria, and began again. Clearing wild forests to make way for housing, flattening hills for roads.
One month ago, we successfully turned a New Foal back into a human. That human was me.
Today, clinics around the city are full of New Foals awaiting to be returned to their human bodies and the Anti-Conversion Formula is being transported to other cities.
In the past, Humanity has made mistakes. We've warred endlessly over resources like Oil and Coal, all the while those very substances polluted the air and water. Eventually we found other sources of energy, cleaner and more efficient. The rapid decay of our planet was halted, and its effects beginning to reverse, but there was always that ever present smell in the air. Now, it's a brand new planet, ripe for civilization.
Thankfully we never lost the knowledge of those modern energy sources, so this time around, those old, polluting technologies will never be an issue. And what knowledge was lost can be easily recovered, as the theory is still known.
I know not what the future may hold. No one ever truly can. When I walked away from that New Foal Center with my few possessions, I wanted nothing to do with anyone, just a desire to be left alone.
Now? I've helped shape the direction Humankind will take for generations to come. And I honestly hope it's for the better.
Thank you for reading, and putting up with my... less than stellar writing. At times it's grown long winded, others it's been lackluster.
But this is important to me, and to many of us.
Never forget your past, lest it become your future.
Forgot to 'Complete' the story, so thought I'd throw up a unused, but already written Page from the book
One thing that many ponies fail to understand about New Foals, is that these are not our bodies. No matter how one stretches it, they're simply not. Like driving a car, or motorcycle, or any other vehicle, while it can become second nature, your first nature is still our human body.
Like with a pony's magic, a pony's body is completely alien to a human. Four legs instead of two, hooves instead of hands, and all of them with at least one additional limb.
So it comes to no surprise that incompatibilities occur. Even now, seven years after the change, I still wake up and attempt to walk upright. I still attempt to grab a glass with my 'hands'. I still attempt to slap insects that land on me. All resulting in a sharp reminder of my situation, usually painful both physically and emotionally.
I feel like my own body is a completely separate entity.
This also leads to another problem, one that pops up every day, for almost all adult New Foals. Sexual attraction.
My mind is human, I grew up admiring the form and shape of the human female, therefore it is understandable that I am attracted to humans. My body is a pony's, affected by such things as smell and touch, therefore it is understandable it is attracted to ponies.
So when catching a glimpse of a shapely behind on a mare, I am torn between two polar opposites. It is not a pleasant experience being simultaneously attracted, and repulsed, by the concept of sex.
Thanks for reading, and hope you enjoyed my little foray into 1st Person POV.