This story is a sequel to Man Cannot Live On Tea Alone

Jake is a human, pulled into Equestria by a magic mishap. Rarity is a fashionista, businessmare, and all-around interesting pony. Jake and Rarity go out for coffee and conversation, and enjoy each other's company. Can Jake match wits with Rarity? Can he keep up with the savvy, sassy mare that he's come to appreciate?

No. No, probably not.

Rated T for Sassy Waitresses, Blushing Ponies, and Ponies That Are So Cute They'll Make You Die. (Oh, and violence!)

Story inspired by gign-3208's beautiful art.

It is highly recommended you read the prequel story first, but this story can stand on it's own thanks to a preface at the beginning that can bring new readers up to speed.

Special thanks to SS&E, Fourths, and Jern for editing.

Jake, a new arrival to Equestria, finds himself roped into a high tea with Princess Celestia and a group of snobby nobles. The lunch is boring, the tea is boring, and the nobles are boring. Celestia gives Jake an out, and he takes it, braving a final conversation with one 'Lady Rarity' in the hopes that he can escape the whole boring affair and get a cup of goddamn coffee.

Inspired by the amazing cover art, by SunBusting.

Rated T for snarky language and witty banter.
The sequel to this story is now available.

A flip of a coin. A twist of fate.

Twilight Sparkle, younger sister of Princess Celestia's personal student, Shining Armor, grew up listening to her brother's bygone dreams of joining the elite of the elite: The Royal Guard.

Now, fresh out of the Academy, this young mare is ready to prove herself equal to the deeds of the great soldiers she read about as a filly. Too bad the princess she ends up protecting isn't Celestia.

To better herself, Luna has studied Twilight's actions and friendship reports almost religiously. However, she never expected to find the tables turned and be under the microscope herself, nor did she realize that a pony would go so far for one they called friend.

Pre-reading/editing by auramane, Habanc, Foals Errand, Meridian Prime, and Timaeus

Cover art commissioned by me and done by Silfoe and can be found here. Thanks a bunch!

This story is a sequel to No Nose Knows

It is recommended you read No Nose Knows first but it's not absolutely required.

Baked Bean was just a regular citizen of Equestria until one fateful day when he accidentally booped Princess Celestia's nose with his own and then found he was forced to marry her to fulfil the terms of an ancient law. Miraculously, Love has blossomed between the princess and the pauper, and the new Prince of Equestria is now looking forward to taking his place at the side of the Princess of the Sun.

But Baked Bean is still very much a novice in the realms of government and nobility, and he's in for quite the crash course between old foes, snobby ministers, and his own shortcomings...

But at least Luna tolerates him now.

~*~
As seen on Equestria Daily!

Proofread and Preread once again by Georg, Moon Fire, Zen and Ponies, and Sipioc!

And with much thanks to You-Know-Who for the cover art!

Baked Bean is but one of the thousands of tourists in Canterlot, and he's looking for some inspiration to help launch his writing career. To this end, he pays a visit to the Royal Gardens, but while there he quickly and quite accidentally invokes a long-forgotten law that will completely upend his life and thrust him into the spotlight...

As Celestia's husband.

And all this because of noses.

As seen on Equestria Daily!

With an audio reading by Fire Hearth Studios!

Cover art graciously provided by the Right Most Awesome Backlash91!
Original cover art provided the Right Most Awesome Sipioc!

Proofreading and prereading services provided by Georg, Sipioc, and Moon Fire!

Fan Art for this story can be found right here!

A most worthy review by Cyonix!

Being an alicorn is wonderful... except when it isn't. There are plenty of things that put a damper on limitless vistas of possibility afforded by such a long life: Court, mortal needs and expectations, the occasional decade of ennui.

And the dreams, of course. Agelessness comes with its own special kind of dreaming. Celestia finds that her own "Inner Court" is a bit too literal, and it--and she--are troubled at the prospect of a near-immortal Twilight Sparkle.

If only she could articulate exactly why that was.

art by spectralunicorn

Part of the Monophysite Quartet, which also includes Celestia Isn't Real, Have You Considered My Servant, Twilight?, and The Esoteric Rites of Darkness. All four stories have a common origin point in an old story idea I called "Monophysite" and touch on who or what Celestia really is in some way. They are otherwise unrelated.

Princess Celestia has been in love with Twilight Sparkle for years. The rescue of her sister had been the start, but since then Twilight has saved Celestia, Luna, and their kingdom countless times. However, Celestia's true feelings have remained hidden, even from herself.

That is, until the day her love is revealed to her through a dream. But Celestia is determined to keep her feelings to herself. She has no idea how Twilight will react, and would prefer things remain they way they are, with the two Princesses as friends.

Unfortunately, Luna immediately finds out. A small group of ponies is quickly gathered, all with one goal: to force Celestia to confess her feelings and end her thousand-year relationship drought.

This causes so much chaos that Discord goes on vacation and will not be appearing in this story.

---

Edited by ShutterflyYay from chapter four onward.

A human finds himself in Equestria under very unpleasant circumstances with no explanation.
His reaction: get the heck out of Dodge and start a new life where Equestria and her ponies can't reach him.
But an alicorn's reach is long and the events which brought him here and his treatment in Canterlot are not so easily forgotten by those who did it. How does one say 'go away' to an immortal goddess?

Yay! Featured, thank you all.
A TV Tropes page
Revised 08/31/14 for clarity and grammatical issues, no events changed. I am working on a sequel, but it will be from Fancy's POV.
P.S. Green is NOT Lyra. There are other green unicorns.

A few months after the events of Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000, Applejack decides to officially integrate the others into her family with an Apple tradition: a long night of cider drinking.

The next morning Applejack wakes up...in Twilight's bed...with a gold band on her hoof...and a legally binding document on the bedside table...

Cover art by ThePristineEye

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Check out the live reading!

And check out About Last Night: A Deleted Scene, by EquesTRON.