//------------------------------// // 16. - Bean's Birthday // Story: This Nose Knows // by Irrespective //------------------------------// “Boop.” Bean groaned a little, muttered something about more rest, and then tried to curl up into a compact ball of sleepy stallion under Celestia’s wing. “Boop.” Something was touching his nose. He grumbled again with the realization that Celestia’s wing was conspicuously absent, but his nose slowly began to sneak towards whatever was touching it. “Boop.” His neck stretched out a little more. Sleep had checked out for the day on him, but he was willing to play along with this little game for a few moments more. He was pretty extra sure he knew who was booping him, and it was his birthday, after all. “Boop!” “Boop?” One eye popped open, and a smile began to tug at the corners of his mouth. Celestia was laying before him with a playful grin and a hoof in the air that was ready to strike. “Boop,” she repeated, and the hoof gently struck his nose. “I think I like the other boop better.” “But that is not a boop, technically,” she replied. “A proper boop requires a hoof to touch a nose. You and I have been sharing fraudulent boops.” “Oh, the horror.” He yawned, and then his hoof reached out and touched his beloved’s nose. “Boop back, then.” “You dare touch my most royal nose?” she exclaimed in mock fury, and her smile couldn’t be any wider if she’d tried. “I shall have to punish you for such insolence.” “And how do you plan to do that, exactly?” “By making you age by one year today.” “A fitting punishment,” he replied while he gratefully accepted her quick kiss. “That should be in about an hour, I believe.” “Happy almost birthday, then.” Celestia gave a playful giggle while they both stood. “Care to raise the sun with me?” “I would be honored and delighted to do so, my dear,” he replied while they nuzzled each other. “And then I would be delighted to spend my day of birth with you.” “You are most fortunate,” she replied with a warmth in her words that sent Bean’s universe into perfect harmony, “for I wish to spend this day with you.” “Do you think anypony else would like to celebrate with us?” Celestia’s eyes sparkled with a knowledge of something mischievous, but she simply clicked her tongue. “I am unsure on that. Philomena, would you like to spend the day with Bean?” Bean laughed while Philomena let out a trill and flapped over to land on his head. She then settled into his bedraggled mane and gave a rapid sequence of chirps and squawks that sounded like she not only wanted to spend the day with him, she would be honored to do so, and that she would remain right where she was for the remainder of the day. “That settles it, then.” Celestia’s light laugh was the summation of pure bliss for Bean, and he was pretty extra sure that he’d never find such delight in any other place. “That makes two. Should we ask Lulu if she would care to join us?” Bean glanced around the bedroom in expectation of her being physically present. “I don’t think there’s enough room on the top of my head.” He shared a small giggle with Celestia before finishing his thought. “However, she may want to walk with us. It would all depend on how irritated she is with me at the moment.” “To your credit, I don’t think you’ve irritated her for quite some time now,” Celestia observed. “I would even go so far as to say that she sees you as something like a brother.” “You think so?” Bean asked with subdued delight. “I’d be happy if she just saw me as a friend, so if she really does think that, well…” “You are a very endearing pony, my finely aged Bean,” Celestia replied with a kiss for her beloved. “You have won my heart, after all.” “I still wake up and wonder how I managed to do that at times. Why should any fair and noble Princess of Equestria have any sort of feelings for me? It really is an astounding thing when I think too much about it. I am here, beside the universally beloved Princess Celestia, Bringer of the Day and Mare of the Morn. I feel her dewdrop coat against my own coarse hide, and her ethereal mane is intertwining with my strawbale of a hairdo. Why would such a perfect mare want to be in any sort of a relationship with me?” “Should I tell you the answer?” she replied while they trotted out to the balcony. “Or perhaps I can show you?” “Could I have both, please?” “If you two are going to start kissing then I’m leaving,” Luna announced. “Three’s company in such cases.” “I’ll take a raincheck on that answer, love.” Bean gave her a wink, and then turned to the other ruler of Equestria. “Good morning, Luna! How did last night go?” “It was remarkably uneventful,” she replied. “In fact, I was able to catch a nap, so I do believe I can be awake during most of your birthday celebrations.” “Really? I’d love to have you with us today. I have to admit I feel bad that we don’t see you much.” “I appreciate your sentiment, Bean,” Luna warmly wrapped a wing over him, “but do not trouble yourself with such thoughts. Duty demands that my time with my friends and family will forever be somewhat limited, but I always cherish the time that I have with them. You and Celestia provide me with all the companionship that I need, and then some. My nights are made all the more whole because of your concern and your love.” Bean’s smile was as wide as Canterlot when he felt Celestia’s wing wrap over him as well, and he felt like he might burst when he saw both sisters smiling just as broadly back to him. There he stood, the commoner who had somehow beguiled a princess, with the love and support of a wife and a family that he never in a million years would have guessed he would have. “This is already the best birthday ever,” he gently replied. “I mean, it’s so good that I might leak some liquid pride here in a moment.” “Go right ahead,” Luna replied while her magic began to reach out for her moon. “I won’t judge.” “Really?” Celestia interjected. “Well, not very much,” she admitted with a low chuckle. Bean closed his eyes and sighed deeply as he felt the last whips of moonlight descend before the horizon. With his sister-in-law so close, it was easy to feel the cool, calm, and collected touch that her magic brought to the moment, and he couldn’t help but offer a small laugh with the thought that next proceeded. “Do you find something amusing about my work?” Luna asked with playful ire. “Not at all, actually,” he replied. “I was just thinking about how calm this moment is, and how peaceful this all feels. If you’ll forgive this commoner of a bit of impertinence, I was making the comparison to what you were as Nightmare Moon to what you are now. I feel no anger, no malice, no jealousy. The sun rises as the moon sets, and all is peace, just as it should be. I’m a bit amazed, really, at your self-control. I’m positive I wouldn’t even be a fraction of the way to where you are, if I had experienced what you have.” Luna said nothing to this, and Bean’s ears folded back. Had he said something wrong? He gasped when he saw a tear trickle down the lunar Diarch’s cheek, and he instantly began to try and undo the damage he’d done. “Wait, I don’t think that came out the way I meant it to. What I was trying to say was—” Luna hushed him gently and with a deep smile. “Don’t try to change what you said, Bean. You spoke from the heart, and it was perfect the way it was.” “You do know I meant it all in good ways, right?” “I do, Bean. One of my greatest fears is that I will relapse into what I once was, and I have been taking great pains ever since my return to ensure that I do not tread that path again. If you have spoken truth to me, and I believe you have, then I have progressed further than I could have ever hoped. Thank you, Bean.” Bean caught his wife taking a quick glance at his flank out of the corner of his eye, and he stifled a chuckle. Either his wife was enjoying a view that had nothing to do with the sunrise, or she was taking a quick peek to make sure he hadn’t somehow added a moon to his already crowded flank. When she met his eyes, though, he felt a surge of peace that couldn’t be fully described, nor did he think he could ever find it in any other place. In that moment, he caught a glimpse of what Celestia the Princess was after, what the endgame to all of her efforts. The pure perfection that he was sharing with the Diarchs of Equestria was what she wanted to bring to all, no matter how many centuries it might take.  “Would you like to raise the sun today, my love?” Celestia gently asked, with a soft peck on his cheek. “I would be honored to, my beloved.” “Hold it.” Luna’s wing retreated, and she moved three steps to the left quickly while Philomena took a short flight from Bean’s head to Luna’s back. “I don’t want to go through your birthday smelling of burnt hair. Now you may raise the sun.” Both Bean and Celestia chuckled before Bean reached out again for his wife’s heavenly orb. He hadn’t had the opportunity to raise it since that transcendent day on the cloud, but he was beyond delighted to again assist. He couldn’t help but giggle a bit in joy as he felt his wife’s magic weave in with his while he gently touched the sun, but his breath did still when he felt that all-consuming fire gently wrap around his heart. Was it really the power of the sun he felt, or was it Celestia’s love that was directly touching his soul? Perhaps it was both, Bean realized, as he gently guided the sun upwards. It was a curious thought, but perhaps the sun was something of a physical embodiment of love. Both helped to sustain life, both helped growth and progress, both brought peace and direction to those who were in darkness. But if it was or if it wasn’t, Bean didn’t really care. What mattered to him is that his beloved Celestia was more than willing to share it with him, and come what may, he would always share it back. Bean felt a residual tingling in his system once he had finished setting the sun into position for the day, and his heart skipped a few beats when his beloved wife’s wing held him just a bit tighter and her lips gently tickled the inside of his ear. “You’re a natural, my dear Bean. We make a good team together.” “That we do.” * * ✹ * * “Birthday pancakes!” Bean proclaimed with a gleeful and unrestrained shout. “Nothing better than birthday pancakes.” “And they differ from regular pancakes in what way?” Luna had to ask. “They have been finely crafted on my birthday!” Bean proclaimed while Celestia placed three plates down on the table. “Otherwise, they’re the same, unless you did something to them, my dear.” “I have either added extra love to them, or extra strawberries,” Celestia replied with a playful grin. “It will be up to you to determine which one, however.” Bean scoffed. “You added love.” “Perhaps you should not challenge the gourmet chef to determine what you did differently, sister,” Luna chuckled. “Hey, I love extra love in my food, for the record,” Bean replied. “You can never have too much of that.” “I will admit that is true.” “Will you be joining us for court today, Luna?” Bean eagerly asked around a large bite. “I’d love to have you with us, if you could.” “I was planning on accompanying both of you today, provided you will have me,” Luna replied with a slight laugh. “Unless you choke on your breakfast, that is.” Bean chewed for a moment, tried to swallow, chewed a bit more, and then gagged slightly while he swallowed. The action made his eyes bulge slightly, and he took a deep breath once the food cleared his pipes. “No choking on birthdays. It’s a new law I just came up with.” “It shall be done,” Luna proclaimed. “And not a moment too soon, either. Do you have any other plans for this, the day of your birth?” “I was expressly told to not make plans, so my day is at your disposal, it would seem.” “And you will be rewarded for doing so,” Luna replied with a smirk. “I have consulted with my sister for many hours to determine the best use of this time, and the plans that we have crafted together should prove to be enjoyable.” “It already is, so whatever you two planned will only add to that.” “And add we shall, but first there is breakfast. We should not let these perfectly good pancakes go to waste.” Three pairs of eyes then turned to Sergeant Clover while she strode into the dining hall and saluted. “Yes, Sergeant?” Celestia got the question out first. “We have just received a message from Miss Inkwell via Corporal Quillpoint, and she wishes to inform you that she will not be coming in to work today, quote, ‘due to my stomach deciding it wants to do the pony pokey,’ unquote. She hopes to return tomorrow, however.” “Very well. Is the Corporal here?” “He is around here somewhere, ma’am.” “Please go dismiss him for the day and have him assist Miss Inkwell in whatever way he can. He is supposed to be keeping an eye on her, after all.” “Tell him to go pick up some peppermint tea to bring to her,” Luna suggested with an understanding gleam in her eye. “I used to chew nothing but mint leaves for months when I was with foal. It was my saving grace.” Clover nodded and dipped her head in acknowledgement, smiled, and then left as quickly as she’d come. Bean frowned a little as he thought about Wysteria’s misery, but then he had an idea that helped his smile to return. “Celly, what would you say if I suggested making a soup for Wys to enjoy this evening? I think a nice vegetable minestrone might do wonders for her.” “I would say that you have a marvelous idea that should be acted upon. How long would it take you to make it?” “If I eat real quick I could get it started now and then let it slowly simmer throughout the day. That should infuse the broth with some nice flavors and a few nutrients, just in case that’s all she can handle.” “I believe we can make time to act upon that.” Celestia cut a large piece of pancake off and stuffed it into her mouth. “And I will hurry and eat so I can help you.” “I shall eat normally, so at least one of us stands a chance at surviving this meal,” Luna added with a shake of her head. * * ✹ * * “Floating along in the air on my birthday,” Bean sang cheerfully while swinging his legs in a slow approximation of the doggy paddle. “Got a blindfold on, doo doot doo, wife’s gonna surprise me with something once she puts me down, doot doo…” “Your rhyming skills are somewhat lacking,” Luna noted with a playful scoff. “That they are, Luna, wherever you are. Would you prefer I sing Modern Pony General? I usually do pretty good until I get to the ‘bothered for a rhyme’ part.” “Perhaps later. We have arrived.” Bean felt his hooves make contact with the ground, and he began dancing in place while he waited for his blindfold to be removed. “I don’t even care what this first present is. The only thing that matters is that you both went through the effort of procuring it for me. I still say I’m getting a stock pot.” “I think this may be up a bit from that,” Celestia whispered into his ear while she removed the blindfold. Bean couldn’t find his breath for a moment, let alone words. The best he could manage was to fall back on his haunches in an effort to take in the totality of what he was seeing. Yesterday, the stained glass window before him had depicted his beloved Celestia in a gracefully flying pose, her wings fully outstretched and her head tilted slightly upwards towards the sun. Today, the glass had been given a large infusion of yellow. Baked Bean, in stained glass form, was in the middle of booping his beloved with his nose, and both of them looked rather pleased with this circumstance. Beneath their feet stood a strong and vibrant patch of sunflowers, and above them was a rendering of Baked Bean’s cutie mark, complete with the words of devotion that had been transcribed upon both his book and his heart. “What do you think, my love?” Celestia pointed to him in the window. “I personally feel that you’re a bit less yellow than that, but otherwise I’m quite pleased with how it turned out.” “It’s… it…” Celestia’s wing wrapped Bean up and pulled him in tight against her. “I think you have some excess liquid pride that needs to be expelled.” “I’m not even going to hide it, these are full-on tears of joy. It’s glorious.” Nothing was said for a few moments as the three Royals looked over the glass, but there were ample sniffles, and not just from Bean. Once he was able to regain some of his composure, he both hugged and kissed his wife before asking a question of her. “Did you come up with the motif?” “Both of us designed this.” Celestia nodded to Luna, who gave a small nod and smile. “In fact, she was the one who did most of the work and planning to bring this about. If anypony can claim this project as their own, it is she.” “Is this the present you mentioned a couple of weeks ago?” He asked her. “It is part of it. I have yet more in store for you.” “You got me a stock pot too, didn’t you?” “Why do you want a stock pot so badly?” Luna had to laugh. “I’m beginning to worry about you.” “Just beginning? I would think you started worrying about me when I first popped out of those sunflowers.” “Perhaps I have begun to worry too late, but I suppose there is little I can do about that now. However, I believe we should move on to the next part of your birthday.” “I’d like that.” Bean sighed with deep joy while he took another long look over the new window. “But I’m not sure how you’ll top this. Will there be an official unveiling sometime?” “That will be tomorrow morning. It should prove to be a short press conference: the press usually takes a few photographs and then they move on to other affairs.” “Their loss,” Bean remarked. “So where to?” “We should probably get to day court,” Celestia replied. “Once we finish with that, we can move on to the party that I’m not supposed to tell you about.” Luna gave her sister a playful glare and a small harrumph. “That was going to be a surprise.” “I’ll still act surprised, how’s that?” Bean offered. “I believe that will be acceptable.” * * ✹ * * “Birthday court, birthday court,” Bean hummed with Philomena’s whistled melody. “Sitting with my wife during birthday court.” “You are bound and determined to add ‘birthday’ to everything you do today, aren’t you?” Celestia asked. “Hah, you said it again,” Bean leaned over to give her a kiss, “and yes. I do plan on doing this all day.” “I shall plan accordingly then. Sergeant Pepper, please escort the first birthday petitioner.” “Birthday petition!” Bean squealed, and laughter was shared with his wife over Luna’s groan. The first birthday petitioner was a pleasant brown pegasus, and he trotted in with a steady step while glancing around at the opulence of the throne room. He then offered a courteous dip of his head to the royals before answering Luna’s question of his name and the nature of his petition. “I am known simply as Feathers, Your Highness, and I just have one request to make today, if that’s alright.” “And what is that?” “Could I get a picture with you?” he respectfully asked. “All of you? I’ve got a twenty-bit wager going with some buddies back home that I wouldn’t be able to meet you during my visit here.” “And where are you from?” Luna pressed. “Cloudsdale, where else?” “I see. Do you have a camera?” “I do, actually,” he replied as he produced it out of his saddlebags. “If it’s too much trouble, I understand, but I really would like to get one, if I may.” “But of course,” Luna replied warmly. “It is my personal pleasure to help win wagers. Sergeant, would you please assist us?” A few photographs were taken, a grateful “thank you” was shared, and Feathers left the Throne Room with a small spring in his step. “Does that happen often, Sister?” Luna asked, and Celestia nodded. “Quite a bit. It seems that most ponies do not believe somepony has met me unless there is photographic evidence.” “Strange, but easily dealt with. Send in the next petitioner.” A yellow pegasus and a light green earth pony were then shown in, and Bean tried not to give the green one a curious stare. There were very few ponies who had dreadlocks for a manestyle, nor did very many come in smelling of fresh compost and… something he couldn’t quite place but gave the impression of being smokey and possibly illicit in composition. Of course, Big Macintosh had visited them not that long ago, and he had still been wearing his yoke and had smelled of freshly squeezed cider. He tucked the thought away with the mental admonishment to be more like his wife and to not judge a pony by first impressions. “Like, wow,” the little pony remarked. “I am totally digging the feng shui of your pad! I’m Tree Hugger, Your Highnesses. Blessings.” “Good morning to you, Tree Hugger,” Celestia replied, “and to you, Director Weatherby! What brings you before the court today?” “Well, it seems we have a small issue, Princess,” Weatherby began. “Two weeks ago, we had to shut down our raincloud machines for some ‘unscheduled maintenance,’ thanks to a certain grey mailmare that I’m gonna throttle if she ever tries to deliver a singing telegram again. This means we’re two weeks behind schedule with water deliveries now, and it’s causing a bit of a kerfluffle.” “How so?” Luna asked. “I would hope that the ponies who were scheduled have been notified of the delay.” “Oh, that’s not the problem. We sent out a notice and most everypony is okay with the wait, except for two groups. See, we need to get a delivery to the west Equestria farmlands, but Tree Hugger here tells me that the delivery is going to interfere with the Breezie pollen collection for the year.” “Totally,” Tree Hugger nodded. “That rain is gonna be such a downer for them.” “Can’t the Breezies just wait a couple of weeks to harvest?” asked Bean. “No way. The portal that leads to their dimension is only open for a short and specific time. They have to harvest then, or like, they won’t have the pollen they need for the next year, and that would be a major bummer.” “So we tell the farmers to hang on for just a bit longer, then.” “No can do,” Weatherby shook her head adamantly. “For one thing, I’ve already had one ear chewed off by the Equestrian Farmer’s Association about the delay. I push back the delivery by even a day, and they’ll come chew off the other one, and probably want my rump served on a platter somewhere, too. Secondly, those crops are going to wilt in the heat enough as is. We risk outright failures if we go too long. Thirdly, if I push the farmers back I’ll have to rearrange all the deliveries after, and that’s going to be a chore, to put it simply, and then I’ll have even more complaints to deal with, and they won’t stop with just me. I’m a bit surprised nopony has come directly to you about this yet.” “This is a weighty problem,” Luna remarked thoughtfully. “Sister, do you have any ideas?” Celestia didn’t say anything immediately, but she did hum slightly in thought. To Bean, the answer seemed simple enough: just make the farmers wait. From his experience, growers always did tend to overstate their problems, and their financial woes. He couldn’t even count how many times the vegetable suppliers to the Zuerst had demanded upfront and in-full payment for their goods because ‘they were going to lose the farm.’ If it really was that drastic, he was pretty extra sure they would have heard something before now. There might be some complaints, but either the situation could be explained or they could just deal with it. “I believe,” Celestia said slowly, “that we can keep the water deliveries on their current schedule and still allow the Breezies to harvest their pollen. Tree Hugger, what if the Breezies were given a new place to harvest from?” Tree Hugger gave a nod and closed her eyes. “That would work, Princess. So long as they have pegasi to give them a gentle breeze and a quiet environment, they should totally be able to harvest from anywhere.” “I think I know just where we can provide both of those needs. Have you ever heard of a small town called Ponyville?” Bean gave a curious look to his wife. “You want to send them to Ponyville?” “Yes. There are many large, open fields just outside of the town that should have an exceptional variety of flowers for the Breezies to collect from, and I believe Fluttershy could provide a great deal of assistance, once she is apprised of the situation. Tree Hugger, why don’t we ask Fluttershy to accompany you to learn about the Breezies, and then she can oversee their journey and collection efforts. Would that be acceptable?” “For sure, Princess. I can tune her chakras to work with the Breezie magic if she’ll spend a day with me studying them.” “Then I believe the matter is resolved,” Celestia stated with a smile. “I shall inform Fluttershy of the need immediately and refer her to you. Director Weatherby, please continue your deliveries as planned, and if any other issues arise with the Breezies, we will contact you.” A few more words were shared with the petitioners, but Bean didn’t hear what was said. He was mulling over his wife’s solution to the problem, and he found he didn’t really like what she proposed. Ponyville was near the Everfree, and there were all sorts of nasty monsters in there that might only be denied a delightfully tasty snack of Breezie Bites for the want of a key ingredient, and as far as he recalled, the residents of Ponyville had a bit of a hard time understanding the concept of quiet. And what of the portal that led to their world? Could the entrance be adjusted, like the mirror that led to the youmon world, or was it fixed? It really seemed like it was going to take more effort than was needed. As the two petitioners left, Bean emptied his mind of questions. His beloved Celly had centuries of experience, and he needed to trust her judgement on this. If she felt the Breezies could be taken care of in Ponyville, then that’s what needed to happen. But it still seemed like it would be easier to just tell the farmers to wait. “Bean, my love? Did you have a question?” “Hm? Oh, no,” Bean replied, but then he smiled sheepishly. “Well, maybe one. What’s a Breezie?” * * ✹ * * “So, what are we having for my birthday lunch?” Bean asked while Philomena wiggled a bit on his head to get comfortable. “What would you like to have?” Luna asked while they rounded the last corner towards the kitchen. “A good hayburger sounds good right now, actually. Maybe some fries too.” Celestia gave her Bean a deep smile. “I’m sure the kitchen staff could provide you with a birthday burger, if we ask nicely.” “What would you like to have?” “I am undecided, but I’m sure I will receive a good selection to choose from.” Bean nodded, and he started to say something while he pushed the door open to the kitchen for the mares in true gentlestallion fashion, but he was interrupted by a blast of confetti to the face from Pinkie Pie’s legendary party cannon. “SURPRISE!” Bean laughed while he tried to recover from the small heart attack, Philomena flew into the kitchen it what looked like an effort to protect her new friend, and Bean trotted in after her while Pinke pulled her cannon out of the way. “Bean, buddy! Get in here, we need your help!” Garbanzo hollered playfully. “These friends of yours have no idea how to cook!” “Now, see here, good sir,” Rarity interjected over the laughter in the room, “I offered to make everypony a nice apron and a monogramed toque, but you insisted that I should fight this absolutely horrid kumquat instead.” Bean laughed all the more as he surveyed the bedlam. All six element bearers were in the midst of preparing food, as were Princess Cadence and Shining Armor, and each of them had a few Beans assisting them while sharing polite conversations and laughter. All of his cousins were there, as were Grandma Flageolet, Grandpa Soy and Grandma Pole, and from the looks of it, they were trying to feed the entire palace. “What are you all doing here?” Bean asked over the din of the pots and pans. “What, you think we weren’t going to show up for your birthday?” Uncle Budge retorted. “Honestly, no! I didn’t!” “We were invited by the Princesses,” Grandma Pole offered while she handed Pinkie Pie a large paring knife. “They both thought you would like to have your friends and family here to celebrate with you.” “Well, they were right,” he replied before giving his beloved a kiss. “Thank you, Celly. It’s wonderful to have everypony here.” “But of course, my dear Bean,” she replied with another kiss. “Now, it would appear that the kitchen staff has been run off by your family, so it seems we should help prepare for the lunch rush.” “Oh, I have to work on my birthday again?!” Bean laughed. “Fine. Celly, quick! I need four or five apples for the Boomer!” “Triple A, or Greenland apples?” “Sweet Apple Acres, of course! We only use the best here!” “Darn tootin’!” Applejack hollered from somewhere in the back. ~*~ “It would seem you have all cooked an acceptable meal,” Grandma Flagolet announced as the plates from lunch were cleared away. “The Code of the Beans is very clear on this point: you are now officially Beans.” A cheer erupted from all, and then a round of laughter followed when a certain white unicorn noted that ‘Rarity Bean’ didn’t sound quite right. “We’ll say it’s more of a title then,” Grandma Flageolet proclaimed. “But now it is time for presents!” Bean had to sit back a little while a respectable pile of presents was placed before him. “Oh, you all didn’t have to do this! I’ve already had such a wonderful birthday.” “We didn’t have to,” Garbanzo replied, “but we’re going to anyway. Here, start with this one. It’s from your mother and me.” “Gee, I wonder what this is.” Bean held the stock pot shaped present in his hooves, and within moments, the obvious was made plain. “You realize I’m not going to be able to use this much, right?” “Yes, but since we bought it specifically for you we figured you should have it all the same.” Bean held his disappointment back quite well. “Thanks. I appreciate the thought.” “That’s just the first part.” Lima pulled another present from the pile and offered it to her son. “We also figured we should get you something else. I hope you like it.” Bean fairly demolished the wrapping paper, but it was Celestia who gasped when the present was shown. Bean held a large scrapbook, and within he found both pictures of all of his accomplishments as a colt, as well as photographs that had been taken during the ‘official’ wedding a few weeks ago. Newspaper clippings from across Equestria announcing the union of common and royal were scattered about, and each Bean had added a personalized letter of congratulations to the happy couple. They spoke of pride, of delight, and of the certainty that Bean and Celestia would be happy, prosperous, and glorious in their rule together. “We actually meant for this to be a wedding present, but it took longer than we anticipated,” Lima explained with a bit of embarrassment. “Do you like it?” “I love it.” Bean’s words were soft, and his hoof traced the edge of the book reverently. “It looks like you’ve put in everything.” “Not everything,” Lima pointed to a page. “Only your victories, Baked. This is a book of your success and your rise to fame. See, here? This is when you won first place at the county fair for that rhubarb pie, and here’s that gold medal you took home for that cheddar broccoli soup from the Equestria’s Up and Coming Chef’s competition.” “And, of course, your marriage to the Princess.” Garbanzo flipped a few pages to show the large wedding portrait that had been taken with all of them. “I think that will be your greatest coup ever.” “I don’t know how I could ever top it,” Bean replied with a hug for his parents. “Thank you. It’s perfect.” “You’re welcome. Now, which one should we do next?” “How about I select at random?” Bean offered. Bean then moved through the presents with glee. From his friends, he received a new formal coat and hat for official functions, coupons for the Sugarcube Corner and a recipe for something called Marzipan Mascarpone Meringue Madness, five jars of zap apple jam, an autographed photo of Rainbow Dash (“I’m going to be a famous Wonderbolt someday and then that will be worth a lot of money,”) a hoof-crafted crystal pocket watch and a dragonscale necklace. He also greatly appreciated the gifts from his family: his grandparents gifted him a book on management techniques, Aunt Cannellini and Uncle Budge gave him a book entitled The Nine Habits of Highly Efficient Ponies, Uncle Pinto and Aunt Adzuki presented him with a beautifully carved and intricate kabuki mask they had found during a recent trip to Neighpon, and Aunt Sieva gave him a collection of gold coins from the Pre-Unification Era that Luna took an immediate interest in. This left only Twilight and her present, but she handed it over hesitantly. “I wanted to go last, just in case you don’t like this.” “It’s a book, isn’t it?” Bean joked. “Of course it’s a book!” Rainbow interjected with a groan. “This is Twilight we’re talking about!” “I’m sure it will be wonderful, and thank you,” Bean offered while he tore the paper away. “I found it in storage while I was tidying up Golden Oaks,” Twilight explained while he continued, “According to the records, the first librarian in Ponyville somehow received it from Canterlot, but I haven’t found out how or why. It’s nearly seven hundred years old, and yet it’s just as good as new.” “And you are willingly parting with it?” Bean asked in amazement. “We had two copies,” Twilight admitted with a slight blush, “but I would have parted with it anyway. I think it’s more important that you have it.” Bean finished with the paper, but he had opened it backwards. He took a moment to appreciate the obsidian cover and the silver trim of the pages, but it was only a quick moment before Celestia gasped. “Your library had two copies of that?” she asked in a breathless whisper. “We did,” Twilight replied with concern. “Should I not have given this?” “Not at all, Twilight. In fact, I’m quite pleased you found it. The only other copy that I know of is held in a special preservation wing in the Archives, having been worn and abused by the ravages of time. Perhaps there are more that can be found.” Bean flipped the book over, and he read aloud the silver embossed title. “The Life and Times of Prince Star Struck, Triarch of Equestria and Most Eternal Mate of Princess Luna.” “Celly!” Luna gasped, and Bean gently passed the book over to her. “You wrote a book about him?! When did you do this?” “Seven hundred years ago. I have been meaning to show you the copy we have in Canterlot, but the Librarians always insisted it could not be touched.” “It’s a complete biography of Prince Star Struck,” Twilight added. “Everything is in there: his birth in the Highlands, his courtship of Princess Luna, their marriage and life together, all of it. Princess Celestia spared no detail.” “Thank you, Twilight,” Bean offered with deep gratitude. “Once I get it back from Luna, I’m sure it will provide me with a treasure trove of information on how to be a better prince.” “Hah!” Luna laughed with a hoof to her mouth and with fat, happy tears in her eyes. “You put that in here?” “I put in everything, Luna,” Celestia gently offered. “From his birth to his death, along with an epilogue detailing your anguish at losing him. I wanted everypony to know how deeply you loved each other, and how that love had come to be.” Philomena gave a happy chirp from her nearby perch, and Luna nodded. “I agree. This is a wonderous present indeed. However, since it is not mine, I should return it and wait patiently for the owner to enjoy it first.” Bean gave a playful scoff to that. “I’ve got plenty of books to read first, Lulu. You can keep that one for now.” “We shall read it together,” Luna announced, “and I shall correct any mistakes my sister made in the narrative.” “I certainly hope so,” Celestia offered a pleased chuckle. “We can add them into the soon-to-be published second edition, if you will permit it.” “I will give my wholehearted endorsement of such.” “Well, that’s it for the presents, it seems.” Bean remarked. “Now what?” “Now what?” Pinkie asked, and she popped up next to Bean to throw a hoof around his shoulders. “Now we party like it’s your birthday, what else?!” * * ✹ * * “Thank you all, again, for coming to my beloved Bean’s birthday party today.” Celestia offered to the small crowd of beloved family and cherished friends that stood on the balcony. “I know many of you had to put aside important personal matters, so it does mean quite a bit to both of us that you would make the time to be here.” “What she said,” Bean added with a huge grin. “And I’m looking forward to the tour tomorrow with all of you. This has got to be one of the best birthdays I’ve ever had.” “Are you going to lower the sun already or what?” Haricot shouted from somewhere. “C’mon! I wanna see you do it!” “All right, all right!” Bean laughed with the others. “But, please don’t tell anypony else about this. Raising and lowering the sun with Celestia is… well, it’s special. I’d even use the word sacred. I don’t want everypony to know that we do this together.” “Darling, our lips are sealed,” Rarity offered, and her statement was agreed to by everypony present. “Please, go ahead.” Celestia’s wing wrapped over a blissful Bean, and he gave his beloved a deep smile. “Thank you, love, for all that you did. I’m sure it wasn’t easy for you to take the time to get this all set up.” “It was worth it, my Bean,” she replied while their magic reached out for the sun together, “and I am glad you enjoyed it. But now I have to do even better next year!” “I don’t doubt you will be able to pull it off,” he whispered with a shudder of delight as he felt the sun’s power flow back to them. “You know, I do need to show you how much I love you still,” she offered in a sultry whisper to his ear while the sun dipped below the horizon. “Should we run off the rabble then?” he teasingly asked. “Later. The night is young, and I believe Luna and Pinkie Pie have more party for us to partake in. We have not yet had your cake, after all.” “It’s not a birthday without the cake, and the candles,” he offered with a sly bob of his eyebrows. “Indeed not. I believe twenty-five candles should just about cover it.” Bean simply laughed to this, and nothing more was said while the sun finished and Luna’s moon gently rose. Except, no moon appeared. Luna’s magic still appeared to be working, and for all appearances, there should have been a moon before them now. There was some awkward shuffling, a few murmurs, and then Luna stomped a hoof with a snort of frustration. “Sister! You let the bulb burn out!” “Oh dear.” Celestia held a hoof before her nose in concern. “So I did. I’m so sorry!” “Wait, what’s going on?” Twilight was the first to ask. “Where did the moon go?” “It’s right there,” Luna replied with a wave of her hoof to indicate where it should be, “but since my sister did not change the bulb during my exile, it burned out, and now you can’t see it.” “You know full well I don’t like to mess with your moon,” Celestia replied with a haughty sniff. “Besides, you’ve been back for a while, so you could have replaced the bulb on your own.” “The moon is powered by a bulb?!” Twilight’s left eye began to twitch furiously. “Replacing the bulb on our celestial bodies is scheduled activity, dear sister,” Luna pressed on, heedless to Twilight’s growing mania. “I’m quite certain you took the time to replace the bulb on your beloved sun!” “Well, of course I did!” Celestia replied. “But you know how I always mix them up. I never can remember if your moon takes the twelve gigajoules or just the eights.” “Point-eights are the close up stars, one point fives are the distant ones, and fifteens are for the moon. You always did have problems with the decimal points.” “Ooh.” Celestia nodded her head in deep understanding. “Those pesky periods. Well, now that I have my Bean here to help me remember, it shouldn’t be a problem in the future.” “It won’t be a problem because I am here now, Sister.” “A valid point.” “Wait, wait!” Twilight cried out, and she physically interjected herself between the two princesses. “Can we please go back to the fact that the moon is nothing more than a light bulb?!” “I tell you what, Lulu. Bean and I will go find a replacement bulb for you, and you can explain things to Princess Twilight.” “Fine, but hurry!” Luna shooed them both off. “The citizenry is bound to notice the lack of a moon eventually.” “We’ll be right back,” Celestia offered in reassuring tones, and her wing swept over Bean as they walked back into the palace. It took a few moments, but eventually Bean asked the obvious question. “Birthday prank?” “My dear Bean,” Celestia replied in a teasing tone. “Why would you think this is a birthday prank?” “Because I’m one year older now, and I’m wise to your tricks.” “I see.” Celestia’s wing gave him a small squeeze. “I shall have to change my tactics, it seems.” “That you will. So what are we really doing?” “Stalling. Luna will try to convince Twilight that the moon is just a large lamp with a long cord while Pinkie Pie slips away and assists us in adding the finishing touches to the Ballroom for your evening birthday party. Once Luna fails in her efforts, she will lead everypony down, and we will surprise them with cake and ice cream.” “I like the sound of that. This would be a good time for Mung and Chowder to coordinate wedding plans with Lulu too.” “I’m sure my sister will make time for that.” “Celly, thank you again for everything.” Bean offered a broad smile and a slight blush with his gratitude. “Today has been fantastic, and I appreciate all that you’ve done for me.” “It has been my pleasure, my beloved,” Celestia replied with a quick boop. “And I look forward to sharing many future birthdays with you as well.” “That is cheesy,” Bean remarked. “But is it birthday cheesy?” “You beat me to it!” Bean groaned in faux agony. “But I still love it. I think that… Discord? Is that you?” “Indeed it is, Old Bean!” Discord quickly pulled off the guard armor he’d been wearing, and Celestia gave Bean a nudge into the Master of Chaos’ open arms. “Didn’t think I would show, did you?” “I was wondering where you were,” Bean laughed. “Well, I couldn’t find a good present, to start,” Discord began while walking with Bean in his arms still and with Celestia trailing behind him with a case of the giggles. “And then I had to help Pinkie Pie with the decorations. I think you’ll like the way I have blended the moss, teal, and salmon streamers with the bright yellow balloons, and… Oh! I almost forgot.” The draconequus produced a huge, familiar-shaped object from an inside pocket of his plaid tuxedo. “I brought that spare sun bulb you were asking about.”