Sergeant Pokey inhaled deeply through his nose as he paused before the office door of Lieutenant Spear Point. Though nearly every guard would admit that the Lieutenant was second only to Captain Armor in terms of likability and professionalism, Pokey always felt that being summoned to his office was like being called down to the principal’s office. It was just about time for the annual reviews, and this could be the first part of a final report that would be submitted to the Captain. His entire future as a guard could possibly be on the line at this point.
“Pokey? You’re here too?”
“Clover?” Pokey verbalized his thought, turned, and returned his partner’s salute before giving her a hoofbump. “I wasn’t expecting you. I guess this isn’t a review, eh?”
“Can’t be. This must be some new threat that’s just cropped up.”
Pokey then rapped on the Lieutenant’s door. “We’d better get the details, then.”
At Spear Point’s invitation, both guards walked into the office, came to attention in front of his desk, and snapped a sharp salute to him. “Sergeants Hokey Pokey and Clover Leaf, reporting as requested, sir.”
“At ease, Sergeants,” Spear replied with a quick return salute, and all three ponies sat. “I’ll get right to the point, since you’re both due to begin your shift. We have a problem on our hooves.”
“What sort of problem, sir?” Clover asked, and Spear slid a manila folder to each of them.
“A great and powerful problem. I’ve just gotten the dossier back on Beatrix ‘Trixie’ Lulamoon, and it’s not pretty. We’ve got a con artist working as a secretary to Princess Celestia.”
The guards quickly read over the documents they’d been presented with as Spear continued. “Here’s what we know: for the most part, Trixie is just a common traveling magician. She picks up the odd complaint of disturbing the peace and false advertising in various cities, but she’s always just sent on her way. Her biggest official offense is a double parking violation in Barrlestown, and she spent a nickel in the clink for that due to her ‘indignant circumstances.’”
“Shouldn’t that be indigent, sir?” Clover asked.
“You would like to think so. Either that’s a typo, or she got jailed for having anger management issues. But then we get to Ponyville, and we get a list of crimes that gives me heartburn: possession of an illegal ancient artifact, inciting a stampede, enslavement, destruction of property, just to name a few. Nopony in town pressed charges, though, and we wouldn’t have known this had even happened save for the fact that Princess Twilight sent a letter to inform us of the new and secure repository for the Alicorn Amulet.
“Sergeants, the official report states that her crimes were a result of the corrupting influence of the amulet, but that does little to assuage my fears. The last thing Equestria needs is a potential hoodlum like Trixie giving the royals advice, but when I approached Princess Celestia about it yesterday, she dismissed my concerns with a simple ‘I trust Miss Inkwell’s judgement.’ I need you two to keep an eye on Trixie and report back to me if she starts to pull any funny business. I would love to trust Miss Inkwell’s judgements as implicitly as Her Highness does, but that’s hard to do since she’s begun naming various potted plants around the palace. She was telling me last night about how Mister Green Leaf smells the best, despite her additions to his feeding schedule, but Miss Ficus relates to her pain better.”
“Is there anything specific we should be looking for, sir?” Pokey asked.
“No; just use your best judgement with this. Maybe it’ll all turn out to be a lot of nothing, but I’d rather not take the chance.”
“Understood, sir.”
“Good. Also, I’d like you two to take Private Lemon Tart with you today. She’s doing extremely well in the A.T.C., but I suspect that she’s doing too good for her own good. A little hooves on experience would help her humility levels, so you may proceed with Operation Ripe as planned.”
“Will do, sir,” Pokey replied. “Anything else?”
“Keep an eye out for changelings, make sure no ancient evils attack the city, maintain the peace, keep the petitioners in line, keep Prince Blueblood from making a fool of himself, make sure your armor is polished, and don’t spit into the wind,” Spear replied with a grin. “Oh, and remember that the review boards will be setting up soon. I’ll be watching you two very closely in the coming weeks.”
“Understood, sir.”
“Good. That is all for now. You’re dismissed.”
Clover and Pokey stood, saluted again, and left with no further comment for their commanding officer. Once out in the hallway, though, they began to discuss this latest information.
“So how big of a threat do you think this Lulamoon is?” Pokey asked.
“I don’t think she’s as bad as it seems,” Clover offered while they walked. “I mean, if she was, the Lieutenant would have had her hauled off by now. I think the main thing we need to watch for is any questionable actions or advice. I think we would have seen something by now, but we know we need to keep a closer eye on what she’s doing. Might be good to do some outside surveillance of her home and her after-hour activities, too.”
“Do you think we should talk to Corporal Quillpoint?” Pokey replied. “With his connections to Wysteria, he could watch that end of things and possibly give us some intel on what has been going on. I only worry he’d be hesitant to share what he thinks is private information.”
“I think it would be wise to advise him,” Clover replied with a smile. “But I also wouldn’t be surprised if he already is keeping a close watch on Miss Lulamoon. We are talking about his marefriend and his future foal.”
“I wonder if the Lieutenant took that into consideration.” Pokey gave a short laugh. “I’ll track him down and let him know what we’re doing, and I’ll get back with you on any intel he might have.”
“Sounds good. What about Private Tart? How should we handle that?”
“How did she do with you the last time?”
“Well enough, until that little Flint monster foalnapped the Prince. I had to dismiss her while we dealt with the aftermath of that. She’s pretty quick on the uptake, but she was cocky. I think a day of chasing Prince Bean around will be a good eye-opener for her.”
“Should we have her follow the Prince and Princess to their tea date?”
“Why not?” Clover replied before growing thoughtful. “In fact…”
Private Lemon Tart was bursting at the seams with pride as she strode down the hallway with Sergeants Pokey and Clover, and a smile threatened to break apart her regulation scowl at any moment. Here she was, still fresh out of training, and she was already being tasked with one of the most important positions in the entire palace. Sure, it could be argued that she would be guarding any and all royals in general, but this? This was the tip of the spear.
You couldn’t go any higher than Princess escort detail.
Oh, if only you could see me now, Mom! Not too bad for a filly out of Vanhoover! she inwardly cheered, and biting her tongue was the only thing that kept her from squealing in delight. All those sparring sessions in the gym, the flight camps, the late night study sessions, the endless pushing and running; everything she’d put herself through was paying off in spectacular fashion. She’d been told that it took years to work up to the inner circle that guarded Princess Celestia, and yet she had made the climb in mere weeks!
Or, she was on the cusp of doing so, at least. She was on provisional status at the moment, and her performance here would determine if she would be able to pursue her ambitious plans or if she would end up guarding a custodial closet in a forgotten hallway somewhere. Plus, she was being considered for Prince Bean’s personal detail, technically.
But guarding the Prince was the same as guarding the Princess, in her mind. The two of them were always together.
“Hold, Private,” Pokey instructed, and the new guard stopped. This junction right before the Princess and Prince’s personal chambers was the formal starting point for the Changing of the Guard, and she stood just a bit straighter. She had dreamed of being a part of this ceremony for as long as she could remember.
And for the first of what would hopefully be many times, Private Lemon Tart stepped off.
“Halt! Who goes there?!” the current sentinels called out.
Tart’s training served her well. She stopped in unison with her superiors, clicked her hooves together smartly, and she saluted the guards currently on duty beside the large door that led into the Princess of the Sun and her husband.
“Sergeant Hokey Pokey, Sergeant Clover Leaf, and Private Lemon Tart, reporting for duty,” Clover replied. “Pass on your orders.”
“Post and orders remain as directed.”
“Orders acknowledged. Well met and well fought; you have leave to retire.”
The steps of the relieved guards were as measured and precise as the new set that now replaced them, and Private Tart felt a wave of pride swell within her as she took up her position on the left of the doorway. Private Lemon Tart: Official Guard to His Highness, the Prince. The words set her skin to tingling.
With the lull that now settled in the hallway, Tart took a moment to review and to self-analyze her performance. She knew that Sergeants Pokey and Clover were tasked with seeing how she performed in this duty, and they could ask any number of questions that she should be able to answer on demand. Although her eyes continued to sweep the hallway, she mentally began to run through some of the potential answers that she might need.
“Sergeant, how was your evening with Bluebell?” Clover asked, and both Sergeants went from at attention to civilian casual.
“It went well, Clover. Really well. I’m really starting to think she’s the one, especially with how well we’ve been hitting it off lately.”
“Oh, you really think so? I didn’t think things were that serious between you two.”
Tart stiffened. This had to be some sort of test. There’s no way the two Sergeants would break regs so blatantly without it being a trap.
“Well, yeah, but I’m really thinking our relationship should be more. You don’t meet a mare like Bluebell just any old day. She’s special.”
“Well, if you take the plunge, I’m happy for you.”
“Thanks. How about you and Huff Duff? Is that going anywhere?”
“I wish it was; he keeps giving me mixed signals. First he’s interested, then he’s not; he wants to see other mares and then I’m the only one for him. I can’t make heads or tails out of his intent.”
“Really? And you’re still willing to date that mess?”
“I don’t know. When he’s sweet, life is wonderful. I just need to figure out how to avoid the lows. What do you think, Private? One mare to another. What should I do?”
Tart knew she had to answer her superior’s question, but she decided to avoid anything personal. “I’m not at liberty to say, Ma’am.”
“Sure you are,” Clover pressed. “C’mon. I could really use some help with this.”
“I’m not at liberty to say, ma’am.”
“Huh! Get a load of the newbie,” Clover scoffed while she turned back to Pokey. “‘Not at liberty to say,’ right. I bet she’s just jealous.”
Tart wanted to protest against the falsehood, but she remained calm, collected, and silent. A guard never spoke about personal affairs while on duty. She really wanted this post, and no insult-baited trap was going to stop her from obtaining her reward.
The doors to Princess Celestia’s chambers were suddenly enveloped in a golden glow, and all three guards came to the ready. Tart felt her heart beating wildly in anticipation, but on the outside she remained cool as a cucumber. She felt ready for anything that might come her way, and now it was time to prove it.
“Are you sure, love?” Prince Bean’s worried tones emitted from the slightly ajar door.
“Really, my Love,” Princess Celestia replied with a soothing voice. “We are hardly the first couple to be disappointed by the attempts of the evening. Sometimes the urge is just not there. It is nothing to be ashamed of.”
“But I really did want to—”
The Prince’s words were cut off when the door shut again, and Tart felt some confusion stir within her. Were the Prince and Princess having marital issues?
Her thoughts were interrupted by a low whistle from Sergeant Clover. “Wow. It’s worse than I thought. Wait’ll Gabby Gums hears about this juicy little tidbit!”
That one nearly got Tart to cry out in alarm. Was the Sergeant really selling royal gossip to the tabloids?! Did she have no sense of privacy and decency?!
“Yeah, no kidding!” Sergeant Pokey agreed. “They’ll pay through the nose for a scoop like that! This could be our biggest payout yet!”
The two Sergeants were spared a lecture from the Private by the timely arrival—and departure—of Prince Bean. Without any warning, the door to his room popped open, and he took off down the hallway in a dead run and while wearing Princess Celestia’s tiara. He attempted to slide around the corner, but he mistimed the approach and ricocheted off of a pillar before tearing down the hallway.
“BAKED BEAN! You get back here!” Celestia shouted in the Royal Voice, and she took off after him with a menacing snort and a slide around the corner that proved she had many years of practicing power slides within the palace.
“What? What is going on?!” Pokey exclaimed in fear. “She’s attacking the Prince!”
“What do we do, Private?!” Clover yelled, and Tart’s eyes went wide.
“What?! I don’t know!” she replied in confused alarm. “Why is she attacking him?!”
“We gotta do something, Private!” Pokey yelled back. “We can’t just stand here!”
Private Tart stammered for a moment as her panic stricken mind tried to formulate a solution. This had definitely not been covered in training yet. “I… we, should… we should pursue!”
“You heard her! Let’s move!” Pokey shouted, and the two Sergeants were off with a quick flap of their wings. Private Tart took off after them on her hooves, but then realized she had wings as well and went airborne with a mental admonishment for forgetting she could fly after her charge.
The three of them weaved through the hallways and followed the sound of Celestia’s golden shoes pounding on the marble floors. Tart’s breathing was coming in heavy bursts as her wings tore at the air, and her mind was reeling with possible reasons for Celestia’s sudden change in demeanor and how to protect Prince Bean from the Solar Princess. For a brief moment, she cursed at the fact that Princess Celestia was so fast, despite living a lifestyle that required very little physical exertion, but then she decided she was more interested in finding out what was in those cakes the Princess ate. There had to be some kind of magical protein mix in the chocolate slices for Celestia to have this kind of pursuit power.
Tart landed and skidded to a stop next to the Sergeants once they had chased the Princess into the throne room. Celestia was carefully surveying behind the throne, and she had a slight twitch in her eye as she sniffed at the air.
“I know you’re here somewhere, Bean,” she offered in a low growl and with a predatory smile. “You shouldn’t have used so much garlic in your spaghetti sauce last night. It will only take me a moment, and then…”
“You’ll never find me!” Bean called out, his voice echoing in the hall. Celestia glanced around quickly, and then she turned to the guards and pointed to Tart with a hoof.
“Private, come here,” she ordered, and Tart followed the command. Celestia then leaned in close, but her eyes continued to sweep the hall. “I’m going to leave,” she whispered, “but I want you to remain. When he emerges from his hiding spot, tackle him. Once you have him, I’ll take care of the rest. Understood?”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
“Good. Sergeants, you come with me. We’ll circle around to the staff entrance, just in case he’s trying to sneak out that way.”
Celestia and the Sergeants left without another sound, and Tart swallowed hard. What had she just agreed to?! Was she really going to assault Prince Bean? How had this spiraled out of control so quickly?
“She’s gone, right?” Bean’s voice emanated from somewhere, and Tart nodded.
“She’s gone, sir.”
“Okay. I’m going to sneak out the main doors. Go make sure nopony’s there, all right? I can make a clean break for it once I get into the hallway.”
“Why is she after you, sir?”
“No time to explain that, Private. Just go check the door.”
Tart then came to a decision, and she stood a bit straighter. “No, sir. I can’t do that.”
“What? I thought you were my guard. Just go make sure the hallway is clear, please?”
“No, sir. I have my orders.”
“Seriously?! What kind of treason is this?”
“It’s not treason, sir,” Tart replied with a note of exasperation in her voice. “Princess Celestia gave me a direct order, sir, and I’m not going to go against it.”
“Fine. I’m not going to come out then. Celestia can just spend the rest of the day searching for me.”
“Sir, really. Whatever it is that you’ve done, I’m sure it can be settled in a reasonable manner.”
“No way. You have no idea what she’s capable of. If she finds me, I’m never going to see the end of eeEEE!”
Bean was suddenly hauled out from behind a curtain by a golden magical field, and Celestia cackled with delight as she reclaimed her tiara from him.
“Thank you, Private. You kept him talking long enough for me to find him,” the Princess replied to the dumbfounded guard.
“Uh, you’re welcome, ma’am?” Tart replied. “What is going on?”
“Oh, this little tease thought it would be funny to see how my little ponies would react if I lost my tiara. He was trying to hide it from me.”
“Wait. You mean all of this is because of some dumb prank, ma’am?”
“It was a good prank,” Bean huffed while he folded his arms tightly. “And I was going to give it back.”
“I’m sure you were,” Celestia replied with a boop for him. “Now, no more funny business. We have a tea date to get to.”
“Fine, fine. But I still say it would be funny.”
“Perhaps another time, my love,” Celestia replied with a surge of her magic, and with a flash, the royalty disappeared from the room.
“Sergeant Pokey? What just happened?” Tart asked her superior while he approached her.
“Well, you just helped Her Highness catch His Highness,” Pokey replied. “Not bad, really. However, we need to get going.”
“Going, sir?”
“Yeah. We’re supposed to be guarding the Prince. We can’t do that if he’s in Ponyville and we’re here.”
“Oh, right. His Tuesday tea date,” Tart suddenly realized.
“Sergeant Clover should have a carriage ready for us to use. Let’s get going.”
“Carriage, sir?”
Private Lemon Tart was really beginning to question her decision-making abilities.
She had known from the start that being a guard to Prince Bean would involve pulling the royal carriage at some point. The idea of being one of those noble pegasi who conveyed the Princess to her various destinations had filled her dreams at night for years at a time, and the strong, proud, and dashing figure she would cut while doing so was the icing on the cake.
This, however, was nothing like what she had expected. Sergeant Clover had been sitting in the carriage when she and Sergeant Pokey had arrived, a newspaper in hoof, and she had ordered the both of them to haul her to Ponyville with a dismissive wave of her hoof. Once they had gotten hitched up and were airborne, Sergeant Pokey had decided that he was going to take a nap, and he was now nothing more than dead weight.
This left Private Tart as the sole horsepower for the flight, and the weight of everything was beginning to get to her. Sweat was beading on her forehead and burning down her ribs and flanks, and her wings felt like they were going to rip clean from her body with each flap. If she somehow lived through this, she was going to have a long conversation with Lieutenant Spear Point about her superior’s behavior and the possible hazing that she was being subjected to right now.
“Pokey!” Clover shouted. “Wake up, Sergeant! We’re almost there!”
“What?! Yes, I’ve been flying this whole time!” Pokey shouted immediately, and he rubbed his eyes with one hoof while his wings started pumping. Private Tart let out an audible sigh of relief as her load lightened, and she thanked whoever cared to be thanked when good things happened.
As soon as they had landed and had stopped, Tart quite nearly began kissing that glorious brown soil that was beneath her hooves.
“Well, that was fun, wasn’t it?” Clover asked while she began unhitching Tart. “Just imagine if it was the Prince and Princess in there, instead of me. The Princess alone has got to weigh a ton.”
“Please don’t tell me that, ma’am.” Tart stretched her legs and wings, and groaned as she felt the tendons stretching. “As far as I remember, the Princess has four pegasi pulling her carriage when she travels.”
“And what if three of them are incapacitated?” Clover asked. “Both Sergeant Pokey and I are ready and able, at any time, to pull that carriage with the royal couple by ourselves. Arduous as it may be, you need to be able to pull them to safety in case something happens.”
The reasoning was sound, but that didn’t help Tart’s inward grumbling. They could have warned her, at least.
“We’ll take up positions here, Private.” Clover continued. “Pokey will secure the rear. Their Highnesses usually take an hour for tea, and then they should be returning to Canterlot.”
“Are we going to be conveying them back to the Palace, ma’am?” Tart asked.
“Unknown. The Princess did just teleport here, so she may just teleport back as well.”
Tart did not vocalize her dismay, and with some considerable effort, she managed to keep from rolling her eyes as well.
“I got four contacts in the home, Clover,” Pokey called out. “Prince Bean and Discord are on the couch near the main window, Fluttershy is to Discord’s left in a chair, and Princess Celestia is on a sofa near the stairway. Harry just left the rear of the cottage and is moving in a south-southwest direction; no other ponies or animals are within fifty yards.”
“Very good. Maintain your post, Sergeant,” Clover called back. “All right. Private, since we have some time, let’s go over how things work out in the field. You have permission to speak freely and to ask any questions you may have, understood?”
“Yes, ma’am. Who has operational control at this moment?” Tart asked.
“For today, I do. Sergeant Pokey and I usually trade off with that.”
“Did I screw up earlier, when the Princess was chasing the Prince?”
“You did, yes.” Clover was blunt, but there was a note of sympathy in her words. “Your main failure was a breakdown of discipline. Rather than trying to figure out what to do, you should have asked Sergeant Pokey and myself what to do.”
Tart thought over that for a moment. “But you asked me what we should do.”
“Did you have operational control at that moment?”
“No, ma’am.” Tart replied in realization. “I did not.”
“The correct reply would have been to ask ‘orders, ma’am.’ Pokey and I wouldn’t be Sergeants if we truly had not known what to do at that point. As guards to Their Highnesses, we have to prepare for every contingency, and that includes the Princess and the Prince having a fight.”
“Oh. So, what would we have done if I had followed proper procedure?”
“We would have protected the Prince,” Clover replied matter-of-factly. “But we would not have engaged in that instance. The other thing you will need to learn is when Their Highnesses are just playing and when they’re serious.”
Tart said nothing more, and she took the opportunity to berate herself for falling apart so easily and so badly. At that moment, she was sure they were going to stick her in some forgotten part of the palace to rot, if she didn’t just get sacked and sent packing outright. She felt like an idiot for allowing her panic to overwhelm her.
“You’re not the first Private to panic in a situation like that, for the record,” Clover offered. “That’s why we do this. We want you to remain calm and collected under the most intense of circumstances, and we’ll get you there.”
“Why haven’t I been told about any of this yet?” Tart asked. “A.T.C. hasn’t covered anything on these things.”
“A.T.C. is for flight maneuvers and assault combat. Guarding the Princess is a whole other program, and it always starts with a panic situation. Now we know we need to work on your discipline.”
“I’m gonna get drummed out, aren’t I, ma’am?” Tart asked, but she hesitated when she saw Celestia’s ears flick towards the window. Had she heard them?
“That will be up to the Lieutenant, Private. Personally, I think you will remain, but you’re not going to get onto Princess detail as soon as you’d like now.”
Tart sighed. “That does seem fair, ma’am. I guess I… pegasus contact inbound, ma’am, to your high three!”
“Hm?” Clover casually glanced over towards where Private Tart was pointing. “Oh, her. At ease, Private. That’s just Rainbow Dash, she has clearance to be here.”
The two guards watched as Rainbow Dash lazily approached, her wings flapping just enough to keep her airborne. Clover then smirked a bit when Rainbow caught a nearby cloud that had been floating idly by, fluffed it up slightly, and then promptly collapsed on it and began to sleep.
“What is she doing, ma’am?” Tart asked.
“Having a nap, it would seem. She likes to come out this way to do so.”
“Oh.”
“She still doesn’t fully trust Discord, either, so she usually isn’t too far away during these tea dates. Pokey and I believe this is an attempt to ‘guard’ her friend Fluttershy. Don’t ever let me catch you napping on the job, Private, and that’s an order.”
“Understood, ma’am. That won’t be a problem.”
Private Tart was inconsolable for the rest of the tea appointment, but she was able to take her mind off of her misery when it came time to return to Canterlot and she had to pull the carriage by herself again. Sergeant Clover was again reading her newspaper, despite being strapped into the harness this time, and Sergeant Pokey enjoyed his turn by waving to non-existent crowds and declaring himself to be ‘the best pony princess that had ever been.’ A quick lunch was then consumed upon arriving at the palace, and the three of them were a few minutes early to their assigned posts in the throne room for day court. Tart wasn’t sure why she was allowed to continue with her assignment, but she decided to enjoy what little time remained to her before the Lieutenant banished her to guard duty on the moon.
At thirteen hundred hours precisely, Prince Bean and Princess Celestia walked into the throne room, with Sergeant Pepper and Miss Trixie Lulamoon following closely behind them. It appeared that Miss Trixie had done something to irk Her Highness, given the death glare that the Princess was now trying to give over her shoulder to the new secretary.
“Trixie really is sorry, Your Highness. I was sure the schedule said twelve thirty.”
“Just don’t let it happen again, Miss Lulamoon,” Celestia tersely replied. “That was… unpleasant, to say the least. I do not wish to deal with that again.”
Trixie’s nose nearly touched the ground. “I didn’t think it was that bad,” she muttered to her reflection.
“Well, we shall leave it in the past and move forward,” Celestia offered while she and Bean settled into the throne. “Let us begin day court now, and we’ll discuss this with Miss Inkwell when she returns.”
Tart felt a twinge of relief and sympathy. At least she wasn’t the only one who was having a miserable day.
“Sergeant Pepper, will you send in the first petitioner?”
Tart watched her comrade in arms as he saluted and moved to the main doors. With any luck, court would pass quickly and without any troubles, and she could get on with her dismissal. She hated it when things were unnecessarily dragged out.
Just as Sergeant Pepper began to reach for the double doors, they slammed open and sent the hapless guard careening back towards the Throne. Tart’s heart began to pound again while she rushed to protect her charge, and she was beyond sure that she was just not cut out for this kind of thing at this point.
“Sweet Celestia above, what is that?!” somepony shouted. The guards quickly formed a defensive line in front of the attacker, and Tart was able to get a good look at the abomination that had dared to assault the throne room.
In form, it looked like an alicorn, but twisted and corrupted beyond anything that should exist in the natural world. The whole of it seemed to be made up of nothing more than the inky shadows of nightfall, except for the two burning white eyes that were quickly assessing the threats before it. It didn’t take long to figure out what this blackened horror was, but it was Prince Bean who managed to verbalize its name.
“It’s the Pony of Shadows!”
An evil, reverberating cackle shook the room and threatened to knock over the assembled guards, but all managed to hold their ground. “So nice to see that I’ve been remembered! Now, I do believe I have some unfinished business with Princess Celestia and her abysmal light, if you don’t mind.”
A golden beam of magic struck the Shadow square in his chest, and he recoiled while letting out a shout of pain. Celestia then landed behind her guards, her horn still glowing and ready to attack again, and she stood proudly before her foe.
“I will not be silenced without a fight!” she shouted. “I will see your villany at an end this day!”
The Shadow roared again, and two tendrils swept out from his sides. Tart managed to leap backwards and out of the way of the onslaught by mere inches, but the rest of her comrades were not so fortunate. Golden armor clattered and banged against marble, and despite another blast from Celestia, the Shadow seemed to remain unharmed and undeterred.
“A nice trick, Princess,” he snarled, “but worthless now. I know how to counter your spells, and I will not fail this time!”
“Private!” Pokey called out to Tart while he got himself upright. “Get the Prince out of here!”
A black beam of magic surged down from the Shadow’s horn and towards Celestia, and she countered it with her own stream of magic. The two seemed to be evenly matched, but then Tart watched in horror as the Shadow began to win.
Another set of midnight tendrils struck out and prevented the guards from gaining their footing for another attack, and Tart suddenly realized that she was the only guard who could intervene. If she could distract the Shadow somehow, that might be enough to allow Celestia to gain the upper hoof and to defeat him. Without that, Celestia would most likely be struck down.
But then she would be leaving her charge, and she had been ordered to get Prince Bean to safety. In the milliseconds she had to ponder the choices before her, she realized that she could either try to assist the Princess or save the Prince.
And at the last possible moment, she made her decision.
“Move!” she ordered the Prince, and she gave him a violent shove towards the staff exit with the assistance of her wings. She refused to look back as she heard Celestia cry out in pain, nor did she relent as Prince Bean pushed back against her and ordered her to release him so he could aid his wife. She simply kept flapping her wings and pushing, and she refused to let anything else matter.
“You killed her! You killed her!” Bean shouted in anguish, but that didn’t stop Tart.
“I’m sure I did, sir, and you can have my head later! I need to get you to safety right now!”
“No! Let me go! Maybe there’s still a chance I can save her!”
“No can do, sir!” Tart closed her eyes and put everything she had into pushing the resisting weight that was the Prince down the hallway. “I have to follow my orders!”
A sudden flash of golden magic still wasn’t enough to stop Private Tart, but being enveloped in a magic field was. She didn’t realize she wasn’t moving or pushing the Prince anymore for a moment, but once she opened her eyes she realized what was happening.
“Good job, Private,” Lieutenant Spear Point offered. “You saved the Prince.”
“I did, sir?” Tart replied. It took her a moment to realize that the Princess and the Lieutenant had appeared out of nowhere on her.
“You did,” Princess Celestia replied warmly. “And for that, you have my thanks.”
“Hey, that was pretty fun,” Bean chuckled with a quick nuzzle for his wife. “We should help out with these things more often.”
“Indeed, yes,” Celestia agreed while she gently put the Private down. “I especially liked how you reacted when you thought I was in trouble.”
“That was no act, my Love. I’d really do that.”
“I have no doubt about that,” Celestia replied with a quick boop for him. “But we should really get day court started for real now. Lieutenant, is there anything else you need from us?”
“Not right now, Your Highness,” Spear Point replied while Tart’s head began to swim. “But I will need you to attend the debriefing later this afternoon.”
“That shouldn’t be a problem. Now, if you’ll excuse us.”
“Sister!” Luna shouted from the throne room doorway with a gleeful and eager expression. “How was that? Was it convincing enough?”
“It was perfect, Luna!” Celestia shouted back with a laugh. “I almost thought he was real!”
“Shadows are always a bit tricky to deal with; a little like clouds in a way,” Luna offered. “Nothing at all like the Nightmare, though. If you are firm, they will follow orders.”
“Private Tart, return to your post.” Lieutenant Spear Point’s voice broke through Private Tart’s walls of confusion. “We will discuss your performance this afternoon. Carry on.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Come in, Private.”
Private Lemon Tart pushed open the door to the Lieutenant’s office, and what little courage she had scraped together was dashed into a million pieces when she saw Princess Celestia in the office with him. Despite the end of her career staring her in the face, Tart still snapped to attention and saluted her superiors once she had entered.
“Private Lemon Tart, reporting in as requested, sir.”
“At ease, Private. Have a seat,” Spear Point replied while he looked over some papers in his magic. “I’m sure you know why you’re here.”
“To discuss my performance today, sir.”
“So what do you think I am going to say?” The Lieutenant dropped the papers to his desk and met Tart’s gaze.
“That my performance was not acceptable, sir.”
Spear Point steepled his hooves together and rested his chin on them. “Private, why did you not follow the orders of Prince Bean? He gave you a direct command to release him.”
“Well, sir, I am his guard. With the rest of his detail unable to protect him, it fell to me to follow orders and to negate any harm that might come to him. I could not defeat the Shadow on my own, so the best course of action was to physically remove him from the situation.”
“Even though it appeared that Princess Celestia was about to be destroyed?”
“I won’t lie, sir. I quite nearly intervened in the Princess’ battle. But I felt that I needed to follow my orders, in the end.”
“Interesting. Private, I’ll lay out what we’re looking at here. Every now and then, we get a Private who, like yourself, is exceptional. They score well on the testing, they learn the maneuvers quickly, and they are able to advance with ease. However, experience has shown that these sorts of soldiers can be given too much too fast, and in a crisis, they break like an improperly forged sword. Everything you’ve gone through today was a test, to see how you react to real-world situations.
Now, your conduct this morning could fall under Article Ninety-Two, if I wanted to try and press the issue. You usurped command from your superior officers, and you allowed the events of the moment to overwhelm your better judgement. However, your devotion to orders, despite a direct command by the Prince to the contrary, is commendable. Most new guards in your situation would have assisted the Princess and left the Prince to fend for himself. It would seem you learned from the failure of this morning, and you adapted well.”
“Thank you, sir.” Tart could almost dare to hope that she might get that abandoned hallway post, based on his tone.
“I’ve talked the situation over with the Princess, and the conclusion is that, while you may not be ready to be posted to the Prince, you can be entrusted with another important assignment while your training continues.”
“Sir?”
“Private, have you had the opportunity to meet Miss Trixie Lulamoon yet?”
Private Tart was nearly humming with delight.
She was still a guard, despite the mistakes of the day, and she was still being entrusted with guarding a very important pony. For the next month, she would be in training with Sergeants Clover and Pokey, and when she was finished, she would be the primary guard to Miss Trixie Lulamoon, assistant secretary to Princess Celestia.
Was it as glamorous as guarding a royal? No, and she wouldn’t pretend that it was. But it was a start, it was a fairly high profile assignment, and she would be associating with those who did guard the Prince and Princess.
It was far better than she could have hoped for.
There were just a few minutes left in the shift, and once she had been relieved, the Sergeants had offered to buy her a drink at the Phoenix Fire, and to discuss her new training regime. She was ready to be done with the day and to relax, and a night out with her fellow guards sounded like the perfect way to unwind.
Her thoughts were suppressed and a sharp salute was again offered when Princess Celestia and Prince Bean rounded the corner. They were chatting about their plans for tomorrow, and Miss Trixie was tailing behind them and trying to take notes while she walked. Private Tart watched her future ward, and she held a smile in reserve for what the future would bring for the both of them. From what she had heard, Miss Trixie was brash, unapologetic, and eager to speak in the third pony, for some odd reason. Tart knew that nearly everypony in the Guard saw her as a liability, and if she was to be honest, she felt that way about Trixie as well.
It was going to be terribly wonderful.
“Private?” Celestia called out while her husband and Trixie entered the bedroom. “May I have a moment?”
“Of course, Your Highness.” Tart dipped her head low. “What can I do for you?”
“I wanted to thank you for what you did, Private,” Celestia offered. “It’s no secret that I love my Baked Bean more than words can adequately express, and I really don’t know what I would do if something were to happen to him. I am most grateful that ponies like yourself have stepped up and are willing to sacrifice your own safety to ensure that those who are around you are protected. The dedication that you, Sergeant Clover, and Sergeant Pokey give to your assignment is noticed and appreciated.”
“Thank you, Your Highness. It is my honor to be given the opportunity to do so.”
“Carry on then, Private, and good luck with your training. I shall be watching your career with great interest.”
Private Tart saluted again, and Celestia nodded with a smile before moving into her chambers. The Princess’ words had given her an amazing boost, and she was ready now to go wrestle two hydras by herself, with enough energy for the odd manticore that might show up to see what was going on.
“Halt! Who goes there?!” Sergeant Clover called out, and Tart felt her chest puff out slightly as the relief guards saluted.
“Corporal Tallgrass and Sergeant Stalwart Grey, reporting for duty. Pass on your orders.”
“Post and orders remain as directed,” Clover announced.
“Orders acknowledged. Well met and well fought; you have leave to retire.”
The steps of the relieved guards were as measured and precise as the new set that now replaced them, and Private Tart felt a fresh wave of pride swell within her as she marched away. The day had been well met, and well fought.
But she was far from retiring, and a small smile emerged. The battle would yet rage on, and she was ready to emerge victorious.
Fortunately, no one brought this group of three guards a chocolate cherry cake with raspberry filling and butter cream rosettes. Because that's just silly.
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And we all know guards don't do silly.
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Most certainly they do not. Would be a breach of protocol!
You know, I honestly felt that this chapter was more of a filler chapter that didn't seem to directly involve the story very mush. But it was a great chapter focusing on a new recruit in the Royal Guard.
8944484
Fair enough. Hopefully I'll do better with the next chapter.
You do realize that Trixie is literally not guilty of any of these things, right? The only times Trixie has commited any crimes was when she was under the influence of Alicorn Amulet. You can't make someone who is clearly not a criminal look like one because of the show's poor writing.
Hmmmm, interesting new character. Hope we get to see more of her in the future.
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That's only what she's been arrested for, but not convicted. I'll need to go back and make that a bit more clear. The idea is supposed to be that Spear is wary of Trixie due to her past, but can't do much since she hasn't been convicted of anything.
Hmm a soldier perspective chap in a story where they aren't the main character. Lovely
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Sometimes it's nice to see what somepony else is doing, just for a little variety.
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Ok. I reworked the section about Trixie's dossier. Let me know if it still needs help, or if I got it all wrong again.
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Whether or not it's filler depends entirely on what comes after. If we keep circling back to these characters, it becomes the intro to the B story! Hooray!
Nice change of pace and perspective. Really liked this chapter.
Keep up the good work my good man
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Thanks, will do!
Always interesting to see a story from a new characters perspective.
As a service member in the United States Army, your rendition of military procedure makes me very happy. There are definitely things that I could point out as not 100% accurate, but this is your story and the military correspondence won’t be the same as the modern military of the West. You did good.
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My biggest fear when I started writing this chapter was that I'd get the procedures all wrong. I admit I have no military experience, so I'm glad to hear that I wasn't too far off.
Though if I may ask, what did I get wrong? What wasn't accurate? I always like to see where I messed up so I can do better the next time around.
as if you would try to make her look bad to proof that she is bad here. I still like her and don't exactly want her to be treaten like that.
I like her, not that she wouldn't or couldn't do it once in a while, but some people really talk to much.
I like that, it made more sense than you making her use some sort of godly knowledge or intution to make her be able to find him. I dislike that "she can do this or that because she is so awesome, can move the planet and knows when to use which spoon", kind of argument.
I know what they are trying to do probably, but I think they are doing a bad job if they themself try to appear somewhat stupid during their job.
I said I liked her, but now that I realize that chapter is probably about the guars, I'm not sure if I will like it so much as others.
I just don't like it, I'm just a bit dissapointed sometimes if I see characters dating a powerfull character or something like that and needing to hide all the time.
Okay so they just played it, which makes it better, but that is still my opinion so I let it stay.
I kniow that doesn't works for everyone but I'm more for the honest approach sometimes and if I would be her I'm half sure that I would be angry about the stunt they pulled.
I noticed I will probably enjoy the lession anyway if they talk about what I think they will.
I'm not sure what Spear Points opinion on this was at the moment and while it was probably right, I kind of wish they would have worked together instead of just keeping Bean away. In english it is difficult for me to find the right words that show exactly what I mean or how I mean it. I can't exactly speak as freely as I would like to in such a situation, but I'm not always a fan of how thinks play out.
I really hope this won't end with Bean being a punching bag needed to be protected all the while. I react different in different situations and with other characters sometimes, maybe it is the writing style, but well I guess I still feel like Bean either needs something really special he is able to do or being able to protec himself or prove himself to others.
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I agree with that I think.
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Trixie is one of my favorite ponies too, and I hope I give her a proper role in my story. But you have to admit that Trixie's actions, magically influenced or not, would be concerning to a pony tasked with protecting the Prince and Princess. Celestia seems to be okay with her, after all.
The trick with this is that it was a deliberate test. Bean needed to act the way he did to see if Tart would follow orders, or if she would abandon him and help the Princess. Spear Point, in the end, was pleased that Tart did not abandon her duties, despite the intense pressure to do. The scenario would have been much different if that had been a real attack.
Bean will yet be awesome. Trust me ...
Nice change of pace 👍
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Thanks!
So they make this kind of test when new guards arrive as candidates for the post of guarding the prince? Have to say, makes sense actually, and I bet Luna has a lot of fun.
Now I'm just wondering how Bean combat training is doing. Oh! maybe Celestia is close to introduce him into an martial art, if I have to guess I think 'Sistema' could be a good choose for him to learn. Not lethal, perfect to self defence and with the objective of submit and not harm.
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Bean: "You may have heard of Ninjutsu, but have you ever seen ... Bean-jutsu?!" *strikes kung-fu pose*
*snickers furiously* "You keep doing that and you'll tie yourself up into a pretzel."
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The thing to remember about any military scene is that orders and procedures MUST be followed. A soldier is NOT going to go harrying off on some side issue if his orders do not permit it. Leaving a post for any reason, except orders from a superior, is considered desertion of duty. And a court martial would be expected. Extenuating circumstances are allowed to be argued in the court martial, but it would be that serious.
For example, if his orders are to guard a door to a building and he sees soldiers chasing an obvious enemy soldier past his post, he remains at his post! He might fire on the individual or seek cover if both sides are exchanging fire, but he would remain posted at that door and preventing the enemy from entering it. Even if the enemy runs straight past him and by his building. He would only seek to chase the enemy if the enemy managed to pass through the door he was guarding.
Why wouldn't he join his fellow soldiers chasing the enemy? Because it all might be a ruse to get him away from his post so ANOTHER enemy could sneak through the door into the building!
Personal issues are similarly ignored.
For example, a decade or so ago, there was an alert that the North Koreans were about to attack the border between North and South. All soldiers were ordered to go to their battle positions. It was just a drill, but only the high-grade officers knew this. In the debriefing afterwards, the army discovered that many of the off-duty soldiers had brought their children with them to their battle-stations as it was impossible for them to secure baby-sitters on such short notice and living on base meant all their neighbors were also going to battle stations, so they couldn't leave the children with neighbors.
The soldiers reasoned that it was better to have the children with them, and there were no orders preventing that action, than to literally abandon them at home in the beginnings of a war. And there was the fear that if they did leave their toddler or young children alone and it was a drill, then they risked social services taking their children away for leaving them alone. (I never did hear what the Army decided to do to solve this issue, but they did NOT issue orders that parents couldn't do in the future what they had done in the drill.)
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You stated it better than I can, but that was what I wanted the feel of this chapter to be: would Tart abandon her duty, or would she follow orders? If we use your explanation, I think it would be like will the guard remain at the door, knowing full well that if he takes two steps to the left and rounds a corner, he can take out a sniper who has the President in his crosshairs? To Spear, he can be assured a pony is fit for princess duty if he or she stays with their orders, even in the face of the Celestia being struck down.
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I'll also throw in that the Guards do have a way to ignore Bean. Shining Armor mentioned back in No Nose that Bean is not equal to Celly and Luna in military rank. If the order is from them, Bean is overruled.
"You usurped command from your superior officers, and you allowed the events of the moment to overwhelm your better judgement."
If Tart was a smart-ass, could have pointed out the sargses gave up command by not asserting it in that moment. Get why Spear Point made that point. As someone who has dealt with people in the military and grown up as a child with a father who served... he
can go fuck himselfand Tart have some growing up to do.8945008
We'll blame that on my abhorrent lack of how the military works. I need to go educate myself.
Maybe Tart gets bonus points for not telling her superior off, even though she could?
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Bah, calling it "filler". I call it world building! Glorious lore-expanding world building. Giving secondary characters (and Chekov's gun) a moment in the spotlight.
Good job, Tart.
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Actually, in this instance, when it's just her and the LT, not calling him out gets her negative points.
One rule I learned really, really damned quickly in BCT was that every goddang minute you are in the military is a test. Every single one. From the moment you sign on the dotted line to the moment you muster out, you're always being tested, watched, and graded.
Your NCOs are there to do the meat-and-potatoes of your testing, teaching you what to do and how to do it, your Officers are there to assess your scores and determine how you're going to be tested in the future.
The big thing the NCOs and Officers want to see from you, though, especially regarding promotion, is initiative and knowledge of the rules. However, they also want to see intelligence.
Say you're a private at a one-man post guarding an out-of-the-way water well. Your LT gives you a verbal order to abandon your post and go shoot something. That's considered a 'special order', and, as it requires you to abandon a guarded post, is also a violation of one of the General Orders, which supersede special orders in all cases. If you call your LT to the carpet right there and then, in public, you just failed your test and likely cop a shot of insubordination to boot. If you ask him for clarification of the orders in public, you've probably broken even, maybe even come out a little ahead. If you say you have to verify those orders from higher-up, you've broken even, but you've probably pissed off the LT, which is never a good career move.
If you just follow those special orders? You've abandoned your post, which is a charge of dereliction of duty, and you've torpedo'd your career, hard.
If, however, you radio in, arrange for your post to be taken, and then privately ask the LT to clarify those orders and whether he knows that his special orders violate the General Orders, you've probably passed. Whether or not you actually follow the special orders, at that point, is another test.
TL;DR, Question your officers. If something stinks, it's because it's supposed to. If you question your officers, do so privately, where they do not get embarrassed. If you don't question your officers, you're killing your career in the quietest way possible.
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Just like Tart, I have much to learn.
Good thing this isn't a military story...
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The royal guard leads to many paths some would consider.....unnatural.
I really enjoyed the last chapter.
I love the character Bean, and I'm sure Little Black Eyed Pea will love him even more...
My imagination took the evaluation down a slightly different track.
It would seem you learned from the failure of this morning, and you adapted well.”
“Permission to speak freely, sir?”
Spear Point nodded. “Granted.”
Lemon Tart’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Given the circumstances, I don’t consider my actions in the morning to be a failure.”
Celestia’s ears pricked up noticeably. The Lieutenant kept the same expression. “Explain.”
“When our shift started, Sergeants Clover and Pokey began discussing their personal lives while on duty station, a clear violation of Article 56. I wondered if this was truly happening or part of a test. Still, my orders for the day were to protect the Prince from harm, and this did not present a threat. It would go into my end-of-shift debriefing or report, however.”
Celestia’s eyes twinkled and she moved her gaze from the Private to the Lieutenant as Lemon Tart continued. “Soon afterwards, the royal couple had their staged argument...which was quite convincing. The Sergeants’ reaction, however, was over-the-top and in blatant violation of a long list of Articles and their Oath. At this point I was reasonably certain this entire scenario was part of a test, or the Princess’s Guard detail was going to be two ponies short tomorrow.”
Celestia was openly grinning now. “I made the call to continue treating what was happening as real. I also downgraded my regard for my superiors’ ability to provide competent leadership. Still, there was no IMMEDIATE threat to the Prince, so I continued my guard duty.”
“When they later turned to me and asked what we should do, I had two thoughts. First, they had completely abdicated their responsibilities as Guardsmen and were therefore no longer my superiors; and second, in absence of new orders, fall back on my original ones: namely, protect the Prince.”
Spear Point frowned and stared for several seconds. “I don’t agree with your reasoning, but I understand it. Still, you should have chosen the correct action defined by established protocol.”
Lemon Tart decided to truly speak freely and she put on an unapologetic smile. “Then I suppose my best defense is that I followed Hoof-To-Hoof Combat-Master Open Hoof’s Seventh Precept.”
Celestia arched an eyebrow and spoke up. “And that is?”
“Forget my first Six Precepts and allow yourself to be unpredictable. Nothing will frustrate your opponents more.” Her state made it clear who she considered her opponent right now. “Oh, and sir?”
The Lieutenant’s frown deepened but he nodded.
“Perhaps Sergeants Pokey and Clover should get some acting lessons from Princess Luna.”
Celestia closed her eyes as she doubled-over with laughter.
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You are way better at this than I am. I am both humbled and amazed. *respectful bow*
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Soon, your journey will be complete.
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Only problem with that is that Tart would still be one of those insufferable, pompous jackenapes who are full of themselves and shatter when a real challenge comes in.
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"Come, join us. We have cookies!"
Wonderful chapter into the life of a guard.
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Thanks!
Poor, poor tart. 😎
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'tis a good learning experience (hopefully).
You know you have a good boss(es) when theu fuck around together with you
This chapter brought back so many memories from my military and law enforcement days
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Ah memories.