• Published 19th Apr 2012
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Know your Mare - overlord-flinx



It's silly, it's pointless, and it makes little to no sense... I've heard of worse story ideas.

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FINAL BATTLE: Luna

Know your mare, know your mare, know your mare...


"I hear the you lack a voice in your numbers," Luna, who was placed in the center of the lit stage, observed.

Just for the time being...

You remembered to lock the door this time...?

Of course...

...No interruptions this time...

Princess Luna...

...has a collective gamer score of three thousand...

"What is a 'gamer score'? Ney, I needn't have a reason to know. That is most likely a low score anyway."

Yeah...

...You would know...

Princess Luna...

...hasn't raised the moon in months...

"If that lie were true, how does thee explain its setting as of late?"

Leave it to your big sister...

Princess Luna...

...thinks the Contra code is for noobs...

"What is a 'Contra'?! Is thou making up words and phrases?"

Not at all...

But could you answer me something...?

"...I am hesitant to say yes..."

What's the opposite of down...?

"Up...?"

Say again...?

"Up."

What's the opposite of up...?

"...Down..."

Sorry, what...?

"Down...!"

If you don't turn right, you turn...?

"Left...?"

Good, you're not wrong, so you're...?

"Right...?"

And the right answer you said was...?

"Left."

And what's the opposite of left...?

"Right."

If you say the alphabet backwards, you'd say C...?

"...B, A."

That's what I thought...

"...I don't follow."

Sure you don't...

...Wink...

Princess Luna...

...sleeps morning to morning...

"Slander! I work very much hard to keep my physique, as well as keep up to date on the current events."

Princess Luna...

...plans to plunge the world into eternal night...

"NEVER!"

...Only so she can play her video games more...

"Video--No! What sort of vile words does thou spit upon me? This goes too far!"

Not far enough yet...

"What does thou speak of?"

Nothing...

...I just found this old journal tucked away in the royal archives...

...written by you in your youth...

...I found a VERY dark note here...

"...Thee jests of brining it forth..."

Not at all...

Let's let the world here that their princess of the night is--

Bam! The lights went out and the sound cut out. "What!? What happened!? Get the power back on you twit!"
A fumble of sound could be heard as the lights and sound graduly returned. But to the announcers' surprise, the stage was now empty of any pony life.

Now Queenie...

...Don't--

GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

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