You could have realistically asked anyone to take our place...
...And you asked them...?
You're forgetting something real important mum...
What's that...?
Faith...
...Have a little faith...
War crushed all of my faith...
What war were you ever a part of...?
The war on Canterlot...!
Queeny please...
...That wasn't a war...
...That was a flank-whooping...
We were winning...!
Yeah...
...and apples grow on trees...
...But--
Give him time...
--So this piece of lettuce walks into a bar...
...And the bar tender asks "What will you have"...
...And the lettuce says 'the salad'...!
Wait...
...No...
...Let me start over...
...Do you mind...?
Please...!
Go right ahead...!
A stallion is building his dream house in town. However, this isn't the first time he has tried. Several times before, and every time something horrible happens in connection with the lighting. But, he feels this time will be different. This time, he asks all the electricians he can find about how to run his wiring right. The ideas were all different, but one thing was the same in all the explanations; "remember to pull this cord". Simple.
So he builds his house, rooms and all. All that's left is for him to do the wiring. He grabs the long piece of lining he set aside and pulls it. His whole house explodes. Hours of work, gone. But, he doesn't let it get him down. Instead, he starts again; but this time he has some other ponies help him. The work gets done in half the time and the house looks better than before. The stallion takes the brown lining again and tugs it.
This time, the house not only explodes, but all the others that helped him are turned into rabbits. Around this time, he starts getting angry, but he tries again. He contracts an entire team of the best workers he can find to build his house, staying out of the way so as not to cause anything to trigger like before. In only an hour or two, the house is made and it's beyond perfect. The whole nine-miles. Now this time he learned from his mistake and handed the brown lining to another pony, telling them to pull it instead.
When that pony did the house exploded, every pony except the first stallion turned into a rabbit, and the construction equipment danced away. Having enough, the stallion took hold of the lining again and yanked on it. He yanked and yanked until finally he was turned into a sloth. Laying on the ground, he sighed: "Maybe I wasn't pulling DISCORD right."
...Hah...
...WAIT A SECOND!
There we go...
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AAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
Niiiice.
LOL
Who was Them?
Chaos
Salad bar
The best puns imaginable.......
God I never laughed this loud in years.
Is that Caramel?
"So I built in the swamp! Everypony said I was daft to build it in the swamp, but I built it all the same!...It sank into the swamp."
So then I built a second one, it sank into the swamp.
2946000
2946032
And then I built a third. That one burned down, fell over, and then sank into the swamp.
2945014
I was just joking. I knew this was some sort of set up. You honestly lost none of my respect, but i am in fact a troll so i had to say it.
These jokes are so bad, they're good.
I hope we find out who this new voice is (if im just not forgetting who the hell it is).
Oh, and its kind of hard to read the grayish text, just so you know.
spelling error on the punchline.. it should be maybe i shouldn't have pulled discord. The way you got it doesn't read right and makes the joke fall flat.
*The Joke Inspector*
2945700
A man walks into a bar with a magnifying glass. He goes to the bartender, looks at his name tag which says 'Miles', and asks "Do you need a bar examination?"
2945014 I was kidding... so, these are two other characters? That's cool. Now, I must figure out who they are!
Hehehehehe okay...
6/10 would laugh again.