• Member Since 12th May, 2012
  • offline last seen 11 minutes ago


I have fanfics older than you.

Big Box O'Links

Help pay Bon Bon's vet bill. She paid a leg, I'd rather not pay the arm too.

My Deviantart Page, on which are posted a variety of things wholesome and relatively boob free.

Derpibooru Profile


Artchonix, because everyone had a tumblr and I wanted to join in.

You're not a gardener, are you? So perhaps you don't know that once a garden is established, much of good gardening is about removal rather than planting, honing what you have to produce a pleasing effect, sacrificing the particular for the good of the whole. Gardening is a creative pastime, but the result is always a work in progress; unlike a painting or a piece of music a garden is never fixed in time.

― Rosalie Parker - In The Garden

The most solid advice for a writer is this, I think: Try to learn to breathe deeply, really to taste food when you eat, and when you sleep really to sleep. Try as much as possible to be wholly alive with all your might, and when you laugh, laugh like hell. And when you get angry, get good and angry. Try to be alive. You will be dead soon enough.

― William Saroyan

Our choicest plans have fallen through, our airiest castles tumbled over, because of lines we neatly drew and later neatly stumbled over.

— Piet Hein - Grooks


  • To Be A Mule Dilly Daliér is a mule with a dream that can never be. by archonix 2,983 words · 2,329 views · 241 likes · 6 dislikes
  • The Festival of Lights Every year, across Equestria, donkeys gather for the Festival of Lights, to dance, to sing. And to remember. by archonix 5,864 words · 712 views · 65 likes · 3 dislikes
  • Morning Glory For her entire life, Twilight has believed that the ponies of Equestria live together in harmony. When she wakes in a strange town, in a body no longer her own, she must face the possibility that Equestria's harmony may be less than she believed by archonix 8,672 words · 905 views · 66 likes · 3 dislikes

The De Raptura Chronicles

  • Guiding Light Calamity befalls the royalty of Equestria and, in lieu of plans that took decades to create and moments to ruin, control of the cosmos is bequeathed to the only pony Celestia had time to empower. by archonix 37,532 words · 5,413 views · 362 likes · 14 dislikes
  • To See The Light On the advent of her coronation, Princess "Derpy" De Raptura continues to adjust to life as Equestria's newest ruler, but soon finds that the power she was granted requires a greater sacrifice than she could ever have thought possible. by archonix 26,829 words · 1,783 views · 194 likes · 8 dislikes

Coming Up...

  • The Light of Other Days Archmage Twilight Sparkle wakes to a summons to see her Princess, Celestia. And that's odd, because for the last fifteen years Equestria has been ruled by Princess De Raptura. by archonix 0 words · 0 views
  • Blame it on the Moon Twilight and Princess De Raptura attempt to regain control of the moon. It shouldn't be hard. All they have to do is dance with it. by archonix 0 words · 0 views

Stalk ALL the users!

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Fandom bucket list · 9:50pm Oct 2nd, 2013

Everyone else seems to have one these days.

☑ Featured fic
☑ Finish something longer than 5000 words
☐ Finish something longer than 100,000 words
☑ Fic on Equestria Daily
☑ Art on Equestria Daily
☐ TV Tropes page of my very own
☑ Muffins!
☑ Get interviewed by a well-known podcast
☐ Get on the Vault
☑ Get senpai to notice me
☑ Become "that donkey guy"
☐ Horse Fame
☐ Not be crazy

... yeah.

Out in the real world my bucket list has things like return to South America, buy a '69 Dodge Charger and own five or more acres of land. One day... :twilightsmile:

Report archonix · 494 views ·


Suddenly the updates are personal. Or not. · 10:39pm June 16th

I have had no opinion on the fimfic update until now, except that it's got some interesting features, but a few days ago I was looking over No Room For Regret in preparation for the next chapter going up in a little while, and I found out that the tags I'd used to make the fancy side-by-side translation of Star and Zecora's conversation in chapter 3 were busted.

Only now I look again, they're not, but something is still a bit broken.

Anyway, I need to fix that.

Also there's a new chapter coming in a few days.

Report archonix · 53 views · Story: No Room For Regret ·

Personal Picks

Favourite One-shots

  • Fluttershy Has Tea With Jesus Fluttershy and Jesus drink tea and nothing objectionable happens. Not a trollfic. by Retsamoreh 2,556 words · 11,373 views · 656 likes · 31 dislikes
  • True True Friends Until the Very End Twilight will never forget her friends no matter how long it's been or where she is. But she's not quite as obsessed with them as her latest faithful student thinks by Richardson 4,081 words · 7,361 views · 899 likes · 27 dislikes
  • Spirit Tethers Princess Twilight Sparkle will never truly die, and never know what happens to those she loves once they pass beyond the veil. But then, one day, she comes up with an idea of how she might find out what lies beyond death. by terrycloth 3,815 words · 1,689 views · 138 likes · 10 dislikes
  • Will the Circle Be Unbroken? Applejack goes down to the River for some advice. by Cynewulf 5,235 words · 1,244 views · 70 likes · 8 dislikes

They Have An Appeal

  • Outside the Reaching Sky Equestria's first interstellar journey by Karazor 106,310 words · 7,902 views · 546 likes · 8 dislikes
  • Adorkable Love Rarity figures out that Cheerilee has a crush on Twilight, and that Twilight is oblivious. Rarity decide to play matchmaker. And Blue Bonnet is the worst delivery pony. Nothing can posi-blie go wrong. by Einhander 101,434 words · 7,594 views · 889 likes · 33 dislikes
  • Arrow 18 Mission Logs: Lone Ranger A mission to investigate a far off world takes an interesting twist. by AdmiralTigerclaw 66,597 words · 52,594 views · 5,132 likes · 84 dislikes
  • Whom the Princesses Would Destroy... Behind the scenes of a perfectly normal visit to Canterlot lies chaos. Also, custard. by GhostOfHeraclitus 19,758 words · 35,448 views · 2,654 likes · 37 dislikes
  • Order Up! In the vegan nation of Equestria, how do you live down a special talent for cooking meat? by Sparkler 12,544 words · 1,810 views · 126 likes · 2 dislikes

Cool Beans

  • Harmony Theory Rainbow Dash awakens in a strange land and must discover why, and how to return home. by Sharaloth 544,462 words · 14,149 views · 1,330 likes · 37 dislikes
  • Princess Twilight Sparkle's 505th Birthday The sequel to Princess Twilight Sparkle's 500th Birthday by Autumnschild 104,072 words · 10,479 views · 1,217 likes · 17 dislikes
  • Stardust Can Twilight earn the trust and friendship of people who are by nature suspicious and hostile to anything that isn't 'human'? by Arad 216,600 words · 43,994 views · 4,834 likes · 85 dislikes
  • 100% Move = 50% Fire For some reason, Twilight never got around to emptying her old Canterlot residence, and the Archives are fed up. She has until sunset to pack and leave. And for the first time in her life, she doesn't seem to be paying attention to the deadline. by Estee 10,001 words · 9,236 views · 1,081 likes · 14 dislikes
  • The Three Sisters Shining Armor and Cadence's spell reveals something completely unexpected. by Wanderer D 6,388 words · 40,580 views · 3,475 likes · 65 dislikes
Comments ( 169 )
  • Viewing 165 - 169 of 169

2380667 That would explain why I started getting favs on it again.

2319402 Oh yes, how dare you appropriate my culture and mock it so with your slightly decadent alternative behaviours beneath the brim! Words shall be had! In fact I dare say I shall write a letter to the Times!

Good day, sir! *nod*

Well, nice hat.

By the way, apparently I owe you an apology for culturally appropriating British headgear at Bronycon and handing out top hats to people who were not British, and wearing one myself. The top hat reflects an outdated stereotype of British people as sartorially sophisticated and a bit stuffy.

  • Viewing 165 - 169 of 169
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Latest Stories

  • T Unexpected
    Gilda is pregnant.
    archonix · 3.6k words  ·  70  8 · 959 views
  • T Succession
    When she was birthed with horn and wings she was thought to be a pegacorn, a rare and blessed blending of the tribes, whose long life and power brought wealth and stature. Then the guards came, seeking the first alicorn born in over a thousand years.
    archonix · 15k words  ·  757  20 · 6.9k views
  • T Morning Glory
    For her entire life, Twilight has believed that the ponies of Equestria live together in harmony. When she wakes in a strange town, in a body no longer her own, she must face the possibility that Equestria's harmony may be less than she believed
    archonix · 8.7k words  ·  66  3 · 905 views
  • T Of the Valley
    Sooner or later, everyone finds their way to Roseluck's flower stall. And then they leave.
    archonix · 1.8k words  ·  297  7 · 2k views
  • T Desert Rose
    For many nights, Qamar of the Horse has dreamed of a moonlit garden filled with white flowers, a strange, dark temple to an unknown goddess, and the shadow of a mare on the horizon. Each morning he wakes to the scent of a rose.
    archonix · 5.3k words  ·  27  1 · 451 views