• Member Since 17th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen 26 minutes ago

Jade Ring


“Stories have to be told or they die, and when they die, we can't remember who we are or why we're here.” -Sue Monk Kidd

E

This is the moment that she has been waiting years for.

After all this time, Equestria's new ruler pays a visit to her most valuable prisoner to fully map out her failure. Years of deception, manipulation, and betrayals have led to this one moment, and she intends to savor every look that crosses the Princess of Friendship's face.

And after, when the alicorn truly understands how perfectly she was played, there will still be one final bit of business that needs to be settled...

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My first new story since October 2017, and Day One of the Seventh Anniversary Story Bomb.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 188 )

R.I.P. in pepperinos Starlight for no one messes with Twilight Sparkle.

Intense and very cool.

Corey #2 · 1 week ago · · ·

Oh, I like this story.

Wow!! Talk about a triple-cross!

This was amazing!

Ze1a7in #4 · 1 week ago · · ·

That...was an IQ 500 Batman Gambit on Twilight's part. Wow. Just wow.

A superb darkfic. Well done.

Um... wasn't one of the points about the Alicorn Amulet that only the wearer can take it off?

Well, that was... disturbing. But very well crafted. To quote or at least paraphrase another master manipulator...

"Sometimes villains gloat too much!"

9561886
Yes, that does ruin the story a bit I suppose, although I do think it's entirely possible after that whole incident Twilight or someone else got their hands on it and altered the enchantments just in case. Presuming, of course, it was too powerful to be destroyed, which if in the case of it being destroyable makes one wonder why it was never done.

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Keep in mind also who it was that surprised Starlight. We've got plenty of in-canon hints that changeling magic is capable of interfering with the normal function of pony magic, and the Alicorn Amulet was made by pony magic to act as an amplifier for it.

YEEEAAAH! Queen Chrysalis to the rescue. A dark fic, with a relatively happy ending. I wish those were more common, to be honest. Nice work!

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I THINK it's supposed to have been a fake, but the story doesn't outright say so anywhere.

Halfway through this story, I despised it. The writing was good, but I loathed the premise; there's just no way (in my opinion) to have a character pull a long con like that without it coming off as either an ass-pull or a contrived retcon.

And then the twist came.

My God, that was beautiful.

All is forgiven. Have a Thumbs Up, good sir!

Maxim 19: The world is richer when you turn enemies into friends, but that's not the same as you being richer.
Maxim 29: The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy. No more. No less.
Maxim 35: That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.
Conclusion: Not only did she forget about Chrysalis, but she set up the very circumstances in which Chrysalis would do this for Twilight. Twilight enjoying the outcome? Icing on the cake.

Very well done. Part of me wants to stop referring to things as wild cards and instead saying they "left the queen in play" when they get their butts trashed because, as Sal Bandini will tell you, "Rule number one: The possum ain't dead until it's scraped off the road."

Ohhhhhhh my goooooooood soooooo badassssss

superfun #15 · 1 week ago · · 12 ·

While this was well written, I can't really say I enjoy it that much, mostly because I just can't get behind the idea of Starlight being still evil, at least not this late in the game.

Sweet. I thought Starlight's turnaround was fishy too, and actually wrote a one-shot that ran along these veins right after the season five finale. This one is better though, and at the very least more thought out. Nice job.

I loved this. You kept me engaged the entire time and even though I saw the twist coming from a mile away, I was still excited to see it go down. Congratulations, you made it into my favorites bookshelf.

Signing out, VShuffler42

Comment posted by Marcbot2004 deleted April 12th

This was awesome. I..have no words. Have like, and favorite.

Wonderful work.

Enthralled from start to end.

~Skeeter The Lurker

She played that bitch like a 2 cent kazoo! I LOVE IT!

Sweetblue #23 · 1 week ago · · 13 ·

Aww, and here i was hoping ponies could finally be free. But i suppose the oppression of harmony never sleeps.

Easily one of my favourite reads on the site in ages :pinkiehappy:

Love the checkmate at the end! I always enjoy stories that portray Twilight as what she should be in the show, the most intelligent mare in Equestria!

Well done!!!

We’re getting Inception up in this.

Idiot #26 · 1 week ago · · 1 ·

Starlight is an idiot. She knows nothing of revolution. Leaving her enemies alive? She deserves her punishment, for committing the sin if stupidity.

Why would Chrysalis help? I would think she would use what Starlight built and take over herself.

9561975
Yeah...what this guy said.

mishun #29 · 1 week ago · · 1 ·

With a nod, Chrysalis practically skipped from the room. She poked her head back in for a moment, shifted herself to a perfect double of Starlight Glimmer

Chrysalis is de-facto glorious supreme leader of Equestria at this point with all her enemies taken care of. What motivation does she have for reinstating ponies in power?

I wonder what will happen to Trixie, considering that she did just straight up commit treason and conspiracy to overthrow the government.... that's a death sentence in MOST countries.

Maud and Discord would likely be serving several years in prison as well, though given how light a touch Twilight is...

Does anybody else get a very distinct Death Note vibe from this whole story? Cause this plays out so much like something that would happen between L and Light and it's AWESOME!

Greenback #32 · 1 week ago · · 4 ·

I never get tired of fics where evil Starlight gets her comeuppance, and this is one of the most satisfying I've read in a while. Bravo!

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Honestly? Yeah, it's a bit odd, but I could sort of see it. Twilight might have some leverage on her and that could play into things.... but honestly, Chrysalis is pretty consistently portrayed as being VERY capable of outrageous pettiness, in addition to all her grander ambitions. I don't imagine she'd STAY satisfied with just Starlight, but for the chance to destroy absolutely everything Starlight had worked for? I could see her taking pleasure in that. Even in restoring the Princesses to power, considering what lengths Starlight went to in order to cast them down. In other words, it has nothing to do with practicality.... and everything to do with destroying Starlight's dreams so utterly that not one trace of her efforts remain.

It's one explanation, anyway.

Totally awesome. All hail queen Twilight.

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Now that you mention it...

9562191
To be fair to Maud, she was sorta forced into this. Like do this or your sister gets it.

mishun #37 · 1 week ago · · 1 ·

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Even in restoring the Princesses to power, considering what lengths Starlight went to in order to cast them down.

If so, she eliminates princesses out of Starlight's sight, transforms into Twilight (or anyprincess she likes) and proceeds to "restoring the Princesses to power". That would be pretty fitting follow up for Twilight's "we're not so different" exposition dump by the way :rainbowlaugh:

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I mean. There are people who have gone undercover for years... and still are, all over the place. Infiltrators, spies, long-term saboteurs. That's in no way unbelievable or unrealistic when it happens in real life, too?

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Thanks! I do seem to have an odd penchant for saying what others are thinking. :)

9562247
Yeah, those people do exist. I guess what I'm trying to say is that for "Starlight is still evil" to work, there are a lot of things you kinda have to gloss over. Those glossed-over bits tend to stick out a little too much for my tastes. It ended up working out here, but I've read plenty of stories where it doesn't at all. And either way, this is still just an AU.

9562191

Same as Starlight: being trapped in a cocoon for the rest of her life while Chrysalis feeds on her.

Knackerman #41 · 1 week ago · · 11 ·

Much as I like listening to villains deliver their verbal coup de grâce I was severally taken out of the moment by the Startrix angle. By the time we got to the ‘twist’ I already saw it coming as a result and as such it left me feeling rather cold.

This is no ‘triumph for the good guys’ with Twilight giving Starlight over to another villain to torture it’s just one kind of villain ‘outsmarting’ another by dent of the first villain accounting for everything but their adversary being more depraved than they are. No one comes out looking good in this story, which is just cynical rather than truly dark.

Also I have to echo other commenters who see no reason for Chrysalis to cooperate, let alone not turn the situation to her own advantage to conquer Equestria. Chrysalis has been emphatic in the show that she wants revenge on Twilight and her friends, not just the student that thwarted her scheme that one time. The fandom plays up the grudge Chrysalis has with Starlight far more than the show does, and it leads to non-sensical situations like this where the greedy Queen of the Changelings is willing to go along with whatever revenge porn fantasies bronies care to come up with when it’s something the character herself would never be satisfied with. Regardless, it’s enough to ‘wow’ the crowd that hates Starlight anyways, so kudos on managing to pick that low hanging fruit.

Been a while since I read a "Starlight was evil the whole time" fic, but this one was quite well done. Especially in how it brought up how canon events helped her cause. Excellent story!

You do know Twilight also has a history of brainwashing.

And that all Starlight ever wanted was friendship. Equality was just a way she was trying to get it.

Even if Starlight's plan did actually succeed, I bet on one thing happening to end that new regime within six hours:
Discord takes off the kid gloves.

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Celestia and Luna are currently mind controlled and unable to lower the sun and the moon and she personally doesn't know the spell to do it

"Hey Starbrain! Your going down!"

"Wait who are you?!"

"Oh… You'll find out because your future is about to change forever! And give back Twilight and her friends' future!"

"Wait what do you mean by that?!"

"Heh like this! CHAOS CONTROL!!!"

Wroth #47 · 1 week ago · · 3 ·

Yeah.. Twilight giving someone over to be tortured is pretty out there..

And even then, we all know the story should've just ended with the new "Princess of Friendship" Chrysalis with both Twilight and Starlight stuck in a cocoon.

The enemy of my enemy is my friend... So long as you have a mutual goal. With the goal taken out. They simply become your enemy. In our own history the saying has a dismal history of actually working.

Wait so it was all a dream?

Darn!

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No, that was all real. That bit at the end is supposed to be Chrysalis brainwashing Starlight.

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