The Long Con
The hour was growing late. Below, in the distant grand ballroom, she could hear the last of the revelers being ushered out by the castle’s beleaguered staff.
Her beleaguered staff.
She repressed the urge to giggle at the thought and forced a serious expression back on her face. There would be plenty of time for laughter later. Years of laughter. Years of celebration.
Years… of equality.
But first there were things that needed to be taken care of, chief among them; the final confrontation. The door before her was the portal to the culmination of her every action for the last few years. Literal years of work had led to this moment. Innumerable machinations, countless hours of preparation and work… all of it had been leading to this one moment. This; her crowning moment of triumph. With as serious as an expression as she could muster, she pushed open the door to the guest room and looked upon its sole occupant.
There, resting comfortably on the room’s sole four poster bed lay the former Princess of Friendship. Her eyes were closed in concentration, her wings folded down across her back. She didn’t so much as twitch as her former student and friend entered the room and shut the door behind her.
“I trust the accommodations are to your liking?”
Twilight Sparkle said nothing.
Starlight Glimmer cleared her throat as she started towards the bed. “If there’s another room in the castle you prefer, I can easily arrange for…”
Twilight sprang. Her attack was silent, her teeth bared in fury and her eyes wide with rage and blazing with vengeance.
Starlight’s magic caught her easily and froze her mere inches from her intended victim. She smirked into the infuriated face of her former teacher. “So quickly you resort to brute force.” She made a show of rotating the violet alicorn a full three hundred and sixty degrees as she floated her back to the bed. Her smirk widened as she took in the plain black equal sign that now emblazoned the mare’s flanks. “Are you really so lost without your magic?”
“Put... me... down.” Twilight growled with as much authority as she could muster while being flipped upside down.
“If I do, are you going to try attacking me again?”
Twilight glared at the unicorn when next their eyes met. “What do you want? Why are you here?”
“I just want to talk.”
“I’ve got nothing to say to you.”
“Oh, no no no. You misunderstand. I want to talk to you. You don’t have to say anything. I just need you to listen.” She set the alicorn back on the bed, but did not release her magical hold. “The question is this; can you listen of your own volition, or do I need to restrain you?”
Twilight chewed on her cheek for a moment before closing her eyes and exhaling. “I’ll listen.”
“Good. But, a warning.” The magic faded and the unicorn saw her former teacher’s muscles bunch for a second attack. “Lunge again, and I take your wings.”
Twilight stalled. “Even you aren’t powerful enough to undo the magic that made me an alicorn.”
Starlight cocked her head. “No, but I am more than powerful enough to pull them off.”
Twilight gaped. “You wouldn’t.”
Starlight smiled sweetly. “Even after everything I’ve done, you really don’t think I’d add just a few drops of blood to my, thus far, bloodless revolution?”
Twilight took a long moment to consider… then finally slumped in defeat. “I… I just don’t understand.” She looked across the room at the mare she’d chosen as her pupil, taking in her new regalia; the golden shoes on her hooves, the crimson cape about her shoulders, and the peaked, shining crown on her head. “Why, Starlight? You were a different mare than you used to be. You’d changed.”
Starlight’s smile grew ever wider. “Oh, Twilight; that's your first misconception about all of this. I never changed.” She pulled a chair close to the bed and sat on it, groaning in ecstasy at finally being off her hooves. “Sorry, but it seemed like every lord and baron in Equestria wanted a dance with the new Princess of Equality. I meant to come see you hours ago.” She kicked off the golden shoes and rubbed her aching hooves. “So… let’s go back a few years, shall we? To when you convinced me that my temporal manipulations would eventually lead to Equestria’s destruction. You were correct in that regard, at least. I was so blinded by my own drive for vengeance against you that I very nearly lost sight of my own goals. I can still remember the fear I felt as you and the others deliberated on my fate. How could I escape from Tartarus, I wondered. Exactly how many dungeon cells does Canterlot Mountain actually hold?” She cut eyes at her prisoner. “There are seventeen levels of dungeons, by the way. I already have about half of them filled.” When Twilight didn’t respond, Starlight continued. “When you came out and decreed that I would be your pupil in the study of friendship, well, I was knocked clean over. ‘This is my chance,’ I remember thinking.”
“Your chance at redemption?” Twilight muttered.
“No, silly.” Starlight giggled. “My chance to succeed where I’d failed in Our Town. I knew it might take years, but if I worked slowly enough, and carefully enough, I could amass the power I would need to bring equality to Equestria.” Her hooves sated for the moment, Starlight sank back into her chair and sighed. “The first step was the simplest; as your student, I needed to learn everything I could about the magic of friendship. I really was a devoted student, Twilight, you have to believe that. And you were a wonderful teacher.”
Twilight’s head sunk at the praise.
“Really, none of this would have been possible without the lessons you taught me.”
Twilight raised her eyes and glared. “I taught you about honesty, responsibility, and restraint.”
Starlight raised an eyebrow. “You also gave me access to books and tomes where I could learn spells like mental manipulation, which really was the key to all of this. You also showed a remarkable susceptibility to manipulation yourself.” She snickered. “You fell for that illusion I cast on the Cutie Map so quickly. You practically gift-wrapped the princesses for me. I needed to test my cutie mark removal spell on ponies of their power level. I knew that if they could be nullified, then anypony could.”
Twilight’s muzzle had dropped so low it was practically buried in the blanket upon which she lay.
“The next step was establishing alliances with those who would be of use to me. Oh, did I say alliances? I meant friendships.” She began to tap her hooves as she counted them. “Discord was the big win, of course. He might be an irritating canker sore, but it was easy enough to figure out his one weakness.”
“Fluttershy.” Twilight muttered.
“Bingo.” Starlight chirped happily. “Thorax and Pharynx were also big gets. I mean, being friends with the defacto rulers of the entire Changeling race? I could’ve seized power back then if my mind magic worked on their species. And then there was Maud, of course.” Starlight’s smirk returned. “Would it break your heart to know that she knew about this from the start? Appropriate, as she was the one who guided me to the caverns that started us off on this grand adventure. That mare can really keep a secret. And do you know the only thing wanted in exchange for her silence and cooperation?”
“Pinkie’s safety.”
Starlight snorted. “Good guess. As though I would ever harm the mare. Come to think of it, you also actually solved one of my bigger issues. I mean, how was I to know that by befriending my childhood playmate, I would actually give myself the in I needed in the Crystal Empire?”
Twilight started violently, as she had just realized that she still did not know the fates of her family in the distant north.
“They’re fine, Twilight. Relax.” Starlight stretched and cleared her throat. “Goodness, I’ve barely started and I’m already parched. Are you thirsty?”
Twilight said nothing.
“Well, I’m thirsty.” She levitated over a nearby bell and rang it. “This one’s yours, by the way.” She floated the bell closer so Twilight could inspect it. “It rings directly for your new maid. I picked her out just for you…”
“You left out Trixie.”
Starlight’s mouth snapped shut. “What?”
“When you were talking about your ‘allies,’ you left out Trixie.”
Starlight smile was smaller this time. “I didn’t need to manipulate her.”
“Of course you didn’t.” Twilight rolled her eyes and glanced at the clock on the wall, as though she was bored. “I knew the two of you getting together would turn out badly in the end.” She offered a sympathetic look. “That’s why I fought so hard against the two of you at first.”
“Your disapproval only made our bond stronger, Twilight. You could never fathom the depth of our feelings for one another. She was over the proverbial moon when I told her of my plans. Not to mention how she made it all so much easier. She’s quite talented spell-caster in her own right, you know.” Starlight sighed. “She’ll make a fine royal consort. And…” She cut her eyes at her lover’s former arch-foe. “Maybe I’ll make a princess of her one day.” A knock came from the door before Twilight could reply. “Ah, here’s your new maid now. You may enter.”
The door opened to admit a statuesque white mare bearing a tray with a crystal pitcher and glasses on one out-stretched hoof. It wobbled slightly, as if the maid was unfamiliar with lifting anything manually. Despite her height, she looked remarkably smaller than either of the mares was used to seeing her, an illusion probably brought on by the lack of her usual royal regalia. She stood still as a statue, a blank smile on her face, as Starlight filled a glass with water and took a sip.
“Most refreshing. You may go now.” Equestria’s new ruler waved a hoof to dismiss the old.
With a slight bow, the maid turned and left the way she’d come, her still and straight tail momentarily brushing over the new equal sign on her flank.
When the door was once again closed, Starlight took another sip of her water as she relished the shocked look on Twilight’s face. “What? You don’t approve? I would’ve offered you Luna, but Trixie’s always been a fan and…”
“What have you done?!” Twilight very nearly shrieked, barely managing to not attempt another flying tackle from the bed. “Celestia and Luna control the sun and moon! Without their magic, we’re…!”
“Doomed?” Starlight took another sip and smacked her lips. “Goodness, however did ponies survive before them? If only there was a caste of ponies whose entire original purpose was to do exactly what they do.” Starlight finished her water and smiled. “It’s right there in the story of Hearth’s Warming, Twilight. It may take a few of us, but unicorns can raise and lower the celestial bodies. The spell’s not even that complicated.” Twilight’s face was everything she’d dreamed and more. “I told you. I’ve been planning for this for a very long time. I considered and planned for every possible situation.” Starlight floated her glass to a nearby table and sank deeper into her chair. “Now, as I said before, Changelings seemed to be immune to my… customized variation of the Fiducia Compelus spell. I admit, I was at a bit of a loss… at least until I discovered what strong friendships Spike had forged with the leaders of Equestria’s two greatest threats; the Changelings and the Dragons. That turned out to be the last key in my little scheme. So, the basic pieces were all in place. Now I just needed to bide my time and wait for the perfect moment in which to strike.” She giggled. “And then you went and just made things even easier!” She recovered quickly and composed herself. “I mean, seriously; putting someone with my history in charge of so many young minds? Young minds that are easier to manipulate and mold than those than most adults? Didn’t it cross your mind, even once, that perhaps putting a pony that some would have once called a cult leader in place as a guidance counselor might be a poor choice?”
Twilight opened her mouth to rebut, but finally just turned away. “I thought you’d changed.”
Starlight ignored her. “Of course, everything would’ve been for naught if Cozy Glow had actually succeeded in her foolish little plan. I took that as a sign that it was time to move and get things rolling. After all, now I knew that your little band of students could wield the Elements of Harmony.” She narrowed her eyes and grinned. “And, thanks to our ‘counseling sessions,’ I could wield your students. The Elements could now be safely removed from the board. The next step was to recapture your friend’s minds. Even without the Elements, I knew they were a force to be reckoned with. Casting my modified Compelus spell was easy enough, even with that stupid little block you’d put on them.” She cocked her head. “Interesting that you put that in place after my little incident. Are your sure there wasn’t some part of you that still didn’t trust me?”
Twilight said nothing. She just looked at the clock again.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Am I boring you? I’m just getting to the best part.”
Twilight looked back. “Sorry, I zoned out for a moment. Please continue.”
Starlight snorted. She wasn’t enjoying this nearly as much as she’d been expecting. “Well, I mean… you should know the rest by now. How I cooked up that little story of an Equalist uprising in the east to get you out of the way, then removed Discord from the board by persuading Fluttershy to devote herself to him completely. After that, I just had to command Sunburst, already under my control, to magically seal off the Crystal Empire for a year or so. Just long enough for me to consolidate control. I even made sure the Pillars would be there by inviting them to a special ceremony in their honor. Once they return, I’ll have all the support I’ll need to force Cadance to concede. Your family isn’t in any danger, I promise. They’ll be free to remain and rule the Empire so long as they don’t attempt to rise against me. That taken care of, it was a simple matter of grabbing the Alicorn Amulet from your storeroom.” She lifted her head to show off her cape’s new clasp, the jewel glowing a dangerous red. “Thanks for the key, by the way. With this magnifying my already impressive powers, I overwhelmed Celestia and Luna’s minds and…”
“Equalized them.”
Starlight clapped her hooves. “Everything was proceeding perfectly, after all my years of planning. But, as you must have guessed by now, I couldn’t just declare myself as the new monarch. There’d be anarchy. No, I had to convince Equestria as a whole that my ideas were the only way to succeed, and that I was the only hope for survival that Equestria had. I needed a threat, one that only I could overcome. And for that, I deployed my secret weapon.” She smirked. “Spike.”
Twilight’s eyes widened. “Where is he?”
“Safe. Tucked away until I need him again. Even I’ll admit that using him to goad Ember and Thorax into all-out war was a touch cruel, but I suppose the ends justify the means.” She tapped her chin as new idea popped into her head. “Come to think of it, he might be just the key I need to turn the Crystal Ponies against Cadance. Imagine! Spike, the Brave and Glorious, preaching the merits of Equalism.” She almost cackled at the idea. “And, in the end…”
“The Dragons and Changelings went to war because each thought the other was holding Spike against his will. And you, using the Amulet, cast a shield over the whole of greater Equestria to keep us out of the conflict.” Twilight’s inflection was monotone, like she was bored. “You repainted your equal sign, declared yourself Equestria’s savior, and used the princesses to declare Equalism as the only way to be saved.”
Starlight’s grin faltered.
“And, of course, you captured me as soon as I returned from the east and snatched my cutie mark before I could think twice.” Twilight was smiling now. “Did I miss anything?”
Starlight ground her teeth. This was all wrong. Twilight should have been groveling at her hooves by now, marveling at the intricacies of her plan, the depth of her cunning. She should be crying to the heavens about how truly a deeply she had been outsmarted.
So why did she look so blasted smug?!
Twilight clapped her hooves in a sarcastic way that looked to Equestria's new ruler as almost familiar. “Starlight, I have to congratulate you. You covered almost every corner. You played nearly the perfect game.”
Starlight’s rage exploded. “There’s no nearly about it! My plan was perfect! I’ve won! I beat you!”
Twilight shook her head as she looked to the clock again, just as the bells tolled midnight. “You made one fatal mistake.”
Starlight’s magic lashed out and destroyed the clock. “And what mistake would that be?” She heard the door opening behind her and turned to berate Celestia for entering without being summoned. Too late, she felt a familiar magic seize the amulet from around her neck and tear it away.
“You left the queen in play.”
Starlight recognized the voice and screamed as the green-eyed beast fell upon her. She struggled as the magical cocoon was sealed around her, blocking her magic as she fired off every spell she could think of in desperation. The viscous fluid in the cocoon sapped her magic and her strength, and soon she could do little more than babble in in insolent rage. She watched as her captor stood to her full height, clearly starving but still very powerful in her own way.
Queen Chrysalis smirked down at her prey with utmost satisfaction.
Twilight jumped off the bed and approached the cocoon. “You know, I’ve never really had an opportunity to study these. From the outside, I mean.”
“May I have her now?” Chrysalis licked her lips. “I’ve waited so very long for this.”
“Not yet.” Twilight tapped the outer membrane and observed its resiliency. “I need her rational enough to tell me where Spike is. After that, she’s all yours.”
Chrysalis leered over her prisoner and smirked as the pony shrank from her gaze. “I’m going to have my vengeance upon you at last, Starlight Glimmer. First, I’m going to break your mind.” A flash of green fire, and it was the Great and Powerful Trixie in her place. “Then, I’ll feast upon your love.”
Starlight shrieked in silence as the former queen of the Changelings resumed her natural form.
Twilight continued to silently study the cocoon. “You should find Trixie in one of the towers. Get her to show you where they’ve been storing cutie marks and set them free. Once the princesses and I have the quelled the fighting beyond the barrier, you’re free to take Starlight and go.”
With a nod, Chrysalis practically skipped from the room. She poked her head back in for a moment, shifted herself to a perfect double of Starlight Glimmer, and winked at the original before she set off to complete her task.
Her curiosity sated for the time being, Twilight sat heavily beside the cocoon and shook her head sadly. “I really am disappointed, Starlight. Did you really think I wouldn’t find it just a tad suspicious that all of my friends were suddenly too busy to come quell a sudden Equalist uprising?” She sighed and stretched her wings. “So I left the Cutie Mark Crusaders with instructions to keep an eye on things. Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom had already come to me and told me of a sudden change in their sister’s behaviors. They managed to get word to me the instant before you sealed off Equestria. Once I realized what you were up to, all I had to do was locate Chrysalis and set up my own rescue before I allowed you to capture me.” Twilight looked at the chair Starlight had been sitting in, considered, and then claimed it for herself with a flap of her wings. “Those blocks in the girl’s heads weren’t there to protect them from you, by the way. They were a precaution against anypony else possibly doing what you’d done. I was actually quite thankful that you’d opened my eyes to a threat I hadn’t considered before.” She floated over the Alicorn Amulet and observed it. “You were an excellent student, Starlight. And, I thought, a good friend. I truly believed you could be better than who you once were.”
Starlight only glared.
“We’re so alike, you know? I mean, this whole plan of Chrysalis coming to my rescue was based entirely on my knowing exactly what you were planning. I knew that you would de-power me and then come visit, simply to lay out the brilliance of your scheme, because that’s exactly what I would do in this situation. If you really were the brilliant tactician you claim to be, you would’ve just stolen my mind or executed me, but no; you had to gloat. To rub my nose in my failure. You’re still the same mare who tried to change history just for a little payback.” She laughed lowly. “You sat here and bragged about your years of planning, you’re preparing for every outcome... Starlight, I might be the Princess of Friendship, but I am the undisputed Queen of Preparation.”
Starlight tried to attack, but her strength was gone. She bared her teeth, ignoring the taste of the fluid that flooded her mouth but wouldn’t drown her.
“I’ll clean up your mess. I’ll select another student and hope that it works out this time. I have an entire school of ponies to choose from now, after all. Your spell is easily reversed, by the way. I cooked up the counter-spell the night after you first cast it, in between dinner and dessert. The girls and the students will all be back to normal in no time. I’ll have a word with Discord, but I’m sure we’ll all forgive him. This is just the kind of thing he does from time to time.” She tossed the Amulet away like a piece of costume jewelry and narrowed her eyes. “It will take some time to fix this issue with the Dragons and Changelings, however. Make no mistake; I can fix it… with the girl’s help, of course. But it will be even easier with Spike. You’ll make this a whole lot easier if you’d just tell me where he is.”
Starlight glared, doing her best to will the universe not to steal her victory. Not when she’d been so close.
Twilight shook her head. “That’s fine. I’ll just cast your little custom spell and you’ll tell me everything I need to know and more. So, while we wait for Chrysalis to get my magic back… and probably snack on your ‘consort,’ if we’re being totally honest… why don’t I try to impart one final lesson, from teacher to student?” She leaned forward. “Friends come in all shapes and sizes. You can be friends with almost anypony, if you give them the chance. You can even make friends with somepony who was once your greatest enemy. Just look at the Crusaders and Diamond Tiara. But here’s the really wonderful thing about friendship; even if you can’t really be ‘friends’ with an enemy, you can still put your differences aside to work towards a common goal. Then they become… what did you call them? Oh, right; ‘allies.’”
There was a flash of light, and Twlight’s familiar starburst cutie mark reappeared on her flanks. She let out a sigh of relief as a magic glow flooded her horn.
Starlight’s eye twitched as the familiar glow of her own spell began to manifest over Twilight’s head.
Twilight took one last look at her former student, profound disappointment etched on her face. “To put it simply, Starlight Glimmer; the enemy of my enemy is my friend.”
Starlight closed her eyes to the glow, willing herself to wake up from this nightmare…
…she started awake with a gasp, looking around wildly. She was still in the throne room. The lights had gone dark and she was all alone. She must’ve fallen asleep before the dance at ended. She shuddered as she recalled the events of her dream. It had all seemed so real. She heard hooves approaching and turned, smiling, as the pony she most cared about approached her. “Hey. Sorry, I must have celebrated too hard.”
“Nothing to worry about.” Trixie offered a hoof. “Come to bed?”
Contentment and love filled Starlight’s heart. It had all been worth it. She’d won, she’d beaten Twilight Sparkle at her own game, and now she could enjoy the fruits of her labors. Now she, together with Trixie, could guide Equestria to the brighter future it deserved.
Her hoof touched Trixie’s... and she felt the love draining from her.
For an instant, she saw past the illusion. Saw the dank cavern that was now her prison.
She saw the flash of green in the unicorn’s eyes.
She knew she’d lost… and she screamed.
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R.I.P. in pepperinos Starlight for no one messes with Twilight Sparkle.
Intense and very cool.
Oh, I like this story.
Wow!! Talk about a triple-cross!
This was amazing!
That...was an IQ 500 Batman Gambit on Twilight's part. Wow. Just wow.
A superb darkfic. Well done.
Um... wasn't one of the points about the Alicorn Amulet that only the wearer can take it off?
Well, that was... disturbing. But very well crafted. To quote or at least paraphrase another master manipulator...
"Sometimes villains gloat too much!"
9561886
Yes, that does ruin the story a bit I suppose, although I do think it's entirely possible after that whole incident Twilight or someone else got their hands on it and altered the enchantments just in case. Presuming, of course, it was too powerful to be destroyed, which if in the case of it being destroyable makes one wonder why it was never done.
9561886 9561909
Keep in mind also who it was that surprised Starlight. We've got plenty of in-canon hints that changeling magic is capable of interfering with the normal function of pony magic, and the Alicorn Amulet was made by pony magic to act as an amplifier for it.
YEEEAAAH! Queen Chrysalis to the rescue. A dark fic, with a relatively happy ending. I wish those were more common, to be honest. Nice work!
9561886
I THINK it's supposed to have been a fake, but the story doesn't outright say so anywhere.
Halfway through this story, I despised it. The writing was good, but I loathed the premise; there's just no way (in my opinion) to have a character like Starlight pull a long con like that without it coming off as either an ass-pull or a contrived retcon.
And then the twist came.
My God, that was beautiful.
All is forgiven. Have a Thumbs Up, good sir!
Maxim 19: The world is richer when you turn enemies into friends, but that's not the same as you being richer.
Maxim 29: The enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy. No more. No less.
Maxim 35: That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.
Conclusion: Not only did she forget about Chrysalis, but she set up the very circumstances in which Chrysalis would do this for Twilight. Twilight enjoying the outcome? Icing on the cake.
Very well done. Part of me wants to stop referring to things as wild cards and instead saying they "left the queen in play" when they get their butts trashed because, as Sal Bandini will tell you, "Rule number one: The possum ain't dead until it's scraped off the road."
Ohhhhhhh my goooooooood soooooo badassssss
While this was well written, I can't really say I enjoy it that much, mostly because I just can't get behind the idea of Starlight being still evil, at least not this late in the game.
Sweet. I thought Starlight's turnaround was fishy too, and actually wrote a one-shot that ran along these veins right after the season five finale. This one is better though, and at the very least more thought out. Nice job.
I loved this. You kept me engaged the entire time and even though I saw the twist coming from a mile away, I was still excited to see it go down. Congratulations, you made it into my favorites bookshelf.
Signing out, VShuffler42
This was awesome. I..have no words. Have like, and favorite.
Wonderful work.
Enthralled from start to end.
~Skeeter The Lurker
9561874
She played that bitch like a 2 cent kazoo! I LOVE IT!
Aww, and here i was hoping ponies could finally be free. But i suppose the oppression of harmony never sleeps.
Easily one of my favourite reads on the site in ages
Love the checkmate at the end! I always enjoy stories that portray Twilight as what she should be in the show, the most intelligent mare in Equestria!
Well done!!!
We’re getting Inception up in this.
Starlight is an idiot. She knows nothing of revolution. Leaving her enemies alive? She deserves her punishment, for committing the sin if stupidity.
Why would Chrysalis help? I would think she would use what Starlight built and take over herself.
9561975
Yeah...what this guy said.
Chrysalis is de-facto glorious supreme leader of Equestria at this point with all her enemies taken care of. What motivation does she have for reinstating ponies in power?
I wonder what will happen to Trixie, considering that she did just straight up commit treason and conspiracy to overthrow the government.... that's a death sentence in MOST countries.
Maud and Discord would likely be serving several years in prison as well, though given how light a touch Twilight is...
Does anybody else get a very distinct Death Note vibe from this whole story? Cause this plays out so much like something that would happen between L and Light and it's AWESOME!
I never get tired of fics where evil Starlight gets her comeuppance, and this is one of the most satisfying I've read in a while. Bravo!
9562158
9562188
Honestly? Yeah, it's a bit odd, but I could sort of see it. Twilight might have some leverage on her and that could play into things.... but honestly, Chrysalis is pretty consistently portrayed as being VERY capable of outrageous pettiness, in addition to all her grander ambitions. I don't imagine she'd STAY satisfied with just Starlight, but for the chance to destroy absolutely everything Starlight had worked for? I could see her taking pleasure in that. Even in restoring the Princesses to power, considering what lengths Starlight went to in order to cast them down. In other words, it has nothing to do with practicality.... and everything to do with destroying Starlight's dreams so utterly that not one trace of her efforts remain.
It's one explanation, anyway.
Totally awesome. All hail queen Twilight.
9562192
Now that you mention it...
9562191
To be fair to Maud, she was sorta forced into this. Like do this or your sister gets it.
9562200
If so, she eliminates princesses out of Starlight's sight, transforms into Twilight (or anyprincess she likes) and proceeds to "restoring the Princesses to power". That would be pretty fitting follow up for Twilight's "we're not so different" exposition dump by the way
9561975
I mean. There are people who have gone undercover for years... and still are, all over the place. Infiltrators, spies, long-term saboteurs. That's in no way unbelievable or unrealistic when it happens in real life, too?
9562187
Thanks! I do seem to have an odd penchant for saying what others are thinking. :)
9562247
Yeah, those people do exist. I guess what I'm trying to say is that for "Starlight is still evil" to work, there are a lot of things you kinda have to gloss over. Those glossed-over bits tend to stick out a little too much for my tastes. It ended up working out here, but I've read plenty of stories where it doesn't at all. And either way, this is still just an AU.
9562191
Same as Starlight: being trapped in a cocoon for the rest of her life while Chrysalis feeds on her.
Much as I like listening to villains deliver their verbal coup de grâce I was severally taken out of the moment by the Startrix angle. By the time we got to the ‘twist’ I already saw it coming as a result and as such it left me feeling rather cold.
This is no ‘triumph for the good guys’ with Twilight giving Starlight over to another villain to torture it’s just one kind of villain ‘outsmarting’ another by dent of the first villain accounting for everything but their adversary being more depraved than they are. No one comes out looking good in this story, which is just cynical rather than truly dark.
Also I have to echo other commenters who see no reason for Chrysalis to cooperate, let alone not turn the situation to her own advantage to conquer Equestria. Chrysalis has been emphatic in the show that she wants revenge on Twilight and her friends, not just the student that thwarted her scheme that one time. The fandom plays up the grudge Chrysalis has with Starlight far more than the show does, and it leads to non-sensical situations like this where the greedy Queen of the Changelings is willing to go along with whatever revenge porn fantasies bronies care to come up with when it’s something the character herself would never be satisfied with. Regardless, it’s enough to ‘wow’ the crowd that hates Starlight anyways, so kudos on managing to pick that low hanging fruit.
Been a while since I read a "Starlight was evil the whole time" fic, but this one was quite well done. Especially in how it brought up how canon events helped her cause. Excellent story!
You do know Twilight also has a history of brainwashing.
And that all Starlight ever wanted was friendship. Equality was just a way she was trying to get it.
Even if Starlight's plan did actually succeed, I bet on one thing happening to end that new regime within six hours:
Discord takes off the kid gloves.
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Celestia and Luna are currently mind controlled and unable to lower the sun and the moon and she personally doesn't know the spell to do it
"Hey Starbrain! Your going down!"
"Wait who are you?!"
"Oh… You'll find out because your future is about to change forever! And give back Twilight and her friends' future!"
"Wait what do you mean by that?!"
"Heh like this! CHAOS CONTROL!!!"
Yeah.. Twilight giving someone over to be tortured is pretty out there..
And even then, we all know the story should've just ended with the new "Princess of Friendship" Chrysalis with both Twilight and Starlight stuck in a cocoon.
The enemy of my enemy is my friend... So long as you have a mutual goal. With the goal taken out. They simply become your enemy. In our own history the saying has a dismal history of actually working.
huh. neat
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No, that was all real. That bit at the end is supposed to be Chrysalis brainwashing Starlight.
I love this, my one complaint is that you made Trixie into a bad guy as well insted if her being just as clueless as twilight. Thaw that's just me complaining as a Trixie fan that dosent see her as evil and hates the startrix ship