• Published 7th Nov 2015
  • 2,513 Views, 253 Comments

Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse - MixMassBasher

Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship. And she's not happy about it.

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Love Arrows of Doom by Rated Ponystar Final Chapter

Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse
by MixMassBasher

Love Arrows Of Doom: Final Chapter: An Archer's Reward... and A Prince's Doom OR (An Archer's End... and still A Prince's Doom)

Dear Diary,

Alcohol. Those really god stuff these dazes.

Me think I drunk one Or a 100 of buttles?

Why m I doin this again? Something about Discor— Oh now I remember...

Whelp... Bottoms up!

*Gulp!* *Gulp!* *Gulp!*

wh4t w4S I taLk1ng b0ut AgA1n?

ALs0 I sh0Ud s1ck 2 beiN a pr1nc3s. c4nt remb3r Y. Ah... FUCK 1T!

FUCK! me hoRNy n0w. Wh3Re hu5Bun?

TH3r3 me h0nEy bUn. BucKin de bUns 0f a d1rtp0ne w1Th R4in... s9methin s8methun... joinin on de ACt10n.

At l3Ast, me thunK ThAt's wHut huPPun. I DRUNK!!!

Me woud f1le dIv0rce p4Per5 if me wusn'T h0rni and DRUNK!!!

Me settlr w1th punishin Shining nOw bi FUckin hiM 5illi a5s de Pr1Nces of LU5t. IN f4CT, L3T'5 H4V3 A 4SOME!

b3sT 3y3deer 3Ver h4D WhuN DRUNK!

Your retired hero,
Princess Cadence

Dear Daughter,

Here's my bow and arrow. Consider yourself the new cupid. You even have the diaper and wingspan for the job!

That should keep ponies off my radar...

Your sober mother,
Princess Cadence

*** Five Days Later ***

Dear Mother-In-Law,

I may be in need of that black dress you gave me a while back.

Your daughter-in-law,
Princess Cadence

Dear Princess Cadence,

If Captain Armor is dead. Does this mean I don't get my promotion?

Flash Sentry

Dear Diary,

Fuck this holiday.

Just because I'm a bookworm doesn't mean I'm supposed to be a virgin until I die!!!

Fed up,
Twilight Sparkle

Dear Twilight,

You're immortal, you can't die.

On the bright side, you can now try beating Celestia’s record of the longest lasting virgin.

Your ex-mentor’s cherry cake is absolutely delicious!


Dear Sister,

Mind if I make a large mural depicting your virginess?

Your little sister,
Light Step

Somewhere far far away...

Shining Armor was running as far as possible away from those crazy mares that wanted to fuck him dead.

Two of the strongest athletic ponies of their generation and a lusty alicorn is definitely a bad combo. Especially to Shining's dick.

Faking his death was his only option. At least until those mares stop being so horny. Though that's probably not going to happen anytime soon.

"Well, what do we have here?" Queen Chrysalis interrupted his train of thought, flying down in front of him.

"Oh, no..." Shining's voice trailed off.

"Time for my reven—" Chrysalis was cut off as a pink arrow from out of nowhere embedded itself onto the Changeling Queen's rump.

"Ah!!! Ahhhhhhh. Feed Me with Your Heart you big piece of fuck meat!" Queen Chrysalis proclaimed, her eyes turning into pink hearts.

"Oh buck me..."

Author's Note:

Original Story Here

See Chapter Here

Check Out The Author Here

A lot of comments on the last chapter of Love Arrows of Doom seem to complain about how Shining was just killed off so bluntly. So, here's an alternate take on the ending. Hope you readers enjoy.

Please Keep in mind that this Fimfiction is not an attack on the Author or His Work. I actually like his story and this letter is done just for the laughs.

Appreciate every like, comment and follow and please tell more people about this story as I always appreciate feedback like what made you laugh and what I can do to improve on as a growing writer. :scootangel:

Try to spot all the references where it be from the show itself or from other media and stories:rainbowlaugh:.

Also here's the non word butchered version of the letter by Princess Cadence:

Dear Diary,

Alcohol. Those really are good stuff these days.

I think I drank one or a hundred of bottles?

Why am I doing this again? Something about Discor— Oh now I remember...

Whelp... Bottoms up!

*Gulp!* *Gulp!* *Gulp!*

What was I talking about again?

Also, I should stick to being princess. Can't remember why? Ah... FUCK IT!

FUCK! I'm horny now. Where's my husband?

There's my honey bun. Fucking the buns of a dirtpony with Rainbow Dash joining on the action.

At least, I think that's what happen. I'M DRUNK!!!

I would file divorce papers if I wasn't horny and DRUNK!!!

I'll settle with punishing Shining now by fucking him silly as the Princess of Lust. In fact, let's have a foursome!

Best idea ever had when DRUNK!

Your retired hero,
Princess Cadence


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