• Published 7th Nov 2015
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Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse - MixMassBasher

Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship. And she's not happy about it.

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Past Sins by Pen Stroke: Chapter 8

Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse
by MixMassBasher

Past Sins: Chapter 8 : You Can’t Hide Magic OR (Alicorn Magic is Overpowered)

Dear Diary,

So I was minding my own business setting up my booth for the Learn and Play Day about Transfiguration Spells when Fluttershy and the mentally challenged drug addict interrupted me. The nerve of someponies. After explaining to them the purpose of my booth when the druggie started pestering me to turn objects into props you could find at a joke shop then asked if I could turn her into something. I GLADLY obliged. I was aiming the spell at the mental escapee intending to turn her into a bloody tree and kill her with fire but Fluttershy was in the way and got hit instead. The druggie was not amused and looked like she was about to attack me so I hit her with a blinding spell and hid under the tables.

That’s when Mommy came to the rescue and now we’re happily eating apples at the apple stand. I’d prefer celery soup but I guess apples are okay. You know the saying; An apple a day keeps the Doctor away. Especially if you aimed for the head.

After the light snack my minions and I participated in the Tug of War Tournament for the Learn and Play Day. We were against both young and older ponies from school so at least one of us could use magic. Obviously that left me to do the dirty work cause of alicorn unicorn superiority. The games would have been fun if my minions wouldn’t stop shouting “Cutie Mark Crusaders Tug of War Champions!!” every five seconds. Things got more entertaining when we were going against the Diamond bitch. My minions and I were at a stalemate during the Tug-of-War with Diamonds’ team but we had a plan. We cheated. We let go of the rope, made them lose their footing, pulled back hard and they faced planted into the mud. Eat Dirt BITCH!! Diamonds girly tantrum only made the victory all the more sweeter.

The final round was against some of the older ponies in our school. It was not going so well. My minions were the first to fall into the mud and that left me. I should really get better minions. So obviously I used my magic full force and pulled with all my might and won.

Yay unicorn power!! Or should I say… ALICORN power?

I’m definitely no weakling for sure and so I stood there waiting for the applause only to be met with stunned silence. Awkward…

I think Mommy also went into Blue Screen of Death mode when I saw her sitting there in the crowd mouth agape. Luckily the silence ended when my minions started cheering for my astounding victory and the crowd soon followed.

To sum it up today was a great day mostly. I even got a prize from the competition. A Kazoo!!! I can’t wait to annoy the fuck out of Fax Machine with it.

Number One Champion,

“Boy, that was crazy,” Rainbow Dash stated while talking with Fluttershy while cleaning up the mess from after the Learn and Play Day. “I mean crybaby Nyx beating that whole team by herself? Wow, what are the chances of that ever happening?”

“It really was amazing,” Fluttershy replied. “I mean her magic was very strong. She turned me into a Celestia-damm Tree for Luna’s sake!! I wonder if everypony in Twilight’s family is that good in magic.”

“Probably,” Rainbow Dash replied as she put a hoof on the door to the supply closet. “too bad that filly is related to that purple bitc-”
Rainbows’ sentence was cut off when she walked into something. Caught off guard by the sudden collision, Rainbow quickly flew backwards and tried to register what she had run into.

“Pi… Pinkie Pie?” Rainbow Dash mumbled confused. She and Fluttershy immediately moved around in front of Pinkie Pie. Pinkie was standing still as a statue on her hind legs in a karate pose, and her eyes were focused on a point on the far side of the room.

“Urm okay? Is… is she dead?” Dash asked, noticing how very still Pinkie Pie was standing.

“Maybe she took too many drugs and now she’s paralyzed?” Fluttershy replied back, poking at Pinkies’ poofy mane.

“Well we got to do something? Wait… I got an idea. Hey Pinkie Pie! Twilight just got a letter from Princess Celestia saying that she wants you to try out a new drug imported from the Crystal Empire.”

Pinkie Pie’s eyes, which had been narrow and transfixed on a spot on the far side of the room, grew wide, and, in a flash, Pinkie was bouncing off the walls and ceiling, her giggles filling the air.

“Oh My Celestia, that’s so super-duper amazing! I so going there right now! Oh A Canterlot I’ll Go. A Canterlot I’ll Go. High Ho A Merry Oh A Canterlot I’ll Go!” Pinkie said in her annoyingly hyper sing-song voice.

“Yeah, Pinkie Pie… about that… I was lying.” Rainbow said apologetically.

Pinkie Pie froze up mid-jump, defying gravity for a moment before dropping down to the ground. She then proceeded to trot over to Dash, hair deflated and glaring with her cold bloodshot eyes. “That was not a fucking okay prank, Dashie.”


“ Anyways who fucking Stared me? Was it you?” Pinkie said pointing at Fluttershy.

“Urm Pinkie, I wasn’t the one who used The Stare on you,” Fluttershy relied warily.

“You weren’t? But then who…” Pinkie Pie began, only for her eyes to narrow. She turned to look at the far end of the room, intending to glare at a pony that was no longer there. “It was him!”

“Him who, Pinkie?” Dash asked.

“The spy!” she shouted as she trotted across the room pointing to a spot on the floor. “I followed him in here, and he was standing right here. Right here! I had him cornered, but then he opened his eyes and then everything went black…”

“Pretty sure you’re just high on drugs?” Fluttershy muttered under her breath.

“Oh well. I guess it doesn’t matter,” Pinkie Pie assured firmly, resuming her normal, happy, bubbly attitude and proceeded to bounce towards the door. “I’ll just have fun with all the afternoon games; I would hate to miss the six-legged race and watching the tug of war. Oh, and I just gotta play Pin the Tail on the Pony!”

“Urm.. Pinkie Pie, you did miss all that.”

Pinkie Pie froze up half way through the door.

A loud blood curtailing scream could be heard throughout all of Ponyville that night.

Dear Spyerton McSpy,

I’ll find you for I am always watching!!!

Never Sleeping,
Pinkie Pie

Author's Note:

Original Story Here: http://www.fimfiction.net/story/41596/past-sins

Please Keep in mind that this Fimfiction is not an attack on the Author or His Work. I actually like his story and this letter is done just for the laughs. I have already gotten permission from the author.

Appreciate every like, comment and follow and please tell more people about this story:scootangel:
Try to spot all the references :rainbowlaugh:


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