• Published 7th Nov 2015
  • 2,513 Views, 253 Comments

Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse - MixMassBasher



Twilight Sparkle, Princess Celestia's most prized and faithful student, is being sent to Ponyville to learn about the magic of friendship. And she's not happy about it.

  • ...
22
 253
 2,513

PreviousChapters Next
Queen Bee by LightOfTriumph

Letters From Across The Disgruntled Multiverse
by MixMassBasher

Queen Bee OR (Princess of the Hive)

Dear Discord,

You despicable dick!

We gave you an island to look after and you gave me a heart attack! Words cannot express my rage at you right now. Your endeavours as of late may have proven you to have some responsibility, but you're still a one-dimensional troll.

Of all your cosmic powers of chaos you could do to me, you gave me a vending machine. You know, those shitty machines that pumps out diabetic canned drinks.

So I thought what the hay, I'll get myself something to drink. By Celestia, do I need one especially with all the bullshit that happens here on a daily basis. What's the worst that could happen? It eats up my bits without giving me a treat.

But, unfortunately, that was not meant to be. For you see, instead of honey tea, I got a swarm of bees. Fifty to be exact.

A cup of bees. How wonderful. Fuck you, Discord. Seriously. Fuck you.

At first nothing happen. That is, until I shouted at the swarm and they started coming at me with poison jabs. They were in hot pursuit, but, luckily, I had very good agility so their fury attacks missed every time they strike. Running and hiding in my stupid castle proved easy with the hundred and one useless rooms I have here. So, I focus my energy to teleport away from those pesky insects. Unfortunately, these bees don't understand the meaning of buzzing off and I kept getting found.

Then I found myself in Fax Machine's room so I figure I'd sacrifice him to the deadly swarm, so I pushed him out.

Yet, after a while, I realized there was nothing but silence. What was going on? He wasn't screaming, "Not the bees! Not the bees!"

Turns out, they didn't sting Fax Machine at all. Guess the bees also agree that Fax Machine is so worthless that he is not even worth being stung. Also, Fax Machine decided to finally be useful and brought our resident doormat for help.

With much assurance, Fluttershy explained that they only attacked me because I ordered them to.

I guess shouting, "Oh, Fuck Me!" wasn't the smartest idea...

Fluttershy also explained further that I'm apparently their queen.... Was all this some kind of one off joke about me being as busy as a bee? I am not amused, Discord. Not amused at all.

On a side note, "Any creature can be a bee if they beelieve in themselves?" Bullshit! You’ve been drinking too much honey, Fluttershy, because your bee translator might be faulty!!

We also found out that the only way to get rid of these puny pests was to find them a new queen bee. Too bad I didn't had some beedrillite with me. That'd have resolved this whole issue.

But then I realized hay free slave labour. The heck do I care?

Eat your hearts out, Thorax and Chrysalis! This is how you control your insect population. Tending to their sole ruler’s needs.

Then, you of all ponies, decide to show up and ruin my mood. What the fuck am I to do with thousands of pounds of royal jelly!?

Bee very afraid, Discord. You unintentionally gave me an army. And I intend to make full use of it. Enjoy being stung.

Payback's a bitch, ain't it?

Your self-proclaimed queen,
Princess Twilight Sparkle.

Author's Note:

Original Story Here: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/420578/queen-bee

Check Out The Author: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/184981/LightOfTriumph


Please Keep in mind that this Fimfiction is not an attack on the Author or His Work. I actually like his story and this letter is done just for the laughs.

Appreciate every like, comment and follow and please tell more people about this story:scootangel:

I'll also like you to tell me what made you laugh and what I can do to improve on for better inspiration for these letters.

And finally how many bee-related pokemon moves can you spot?

Also,

Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
PreviousChapters Next
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!