• Member Since 6th Jan, 2014

Curtis LeMay


Successful offense brings victory. Successful defense can now only lessen defeat.

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Total Words: 44,232,899
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T

3/14/24 Still Alive Edition

There's only one pony in Ponyville that the Mane Six have never met. Pinkie Pie has never thrown him a party, Applejack has never sold him a mug of cider, and Twilight has never seen him check out any books. And as far as that unicorn, Lapis Print, is concerned, that's exactly how it should be.

Lapis can't risk them knowing where he lives, what he does for a living, or even what his name is - if he gets his way, the Mane Six won't even know he exists, and nopony in Ponyville will miss him once he's gone.

It should be a piece of cake - after all, it's not like the biggest magical power in Equestria is about making sure everypony looks out for each other, right?

(Rated Teen for language - mental cursing mostly.)

Chapters (19)
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In every world, era, and species, adolescents think they're the first to invent or discover whatever they come across. It's not hard to see why. In the flower of youth, every experience is new and fresh and exciting, especially the ones previous generations won't discuss. Not in polite company, anyway. Certainly not with their children.

Well, "exciting" isn't always the best word to describe those discoveries. Sometimes it's "horrifying." Especially when it involves certain alicorn princesses.

Rated Teen for discussion of topics that would be rated Mature. Also rated C for Crackfic. Graciously preread by Comma Typer.

Chapters (1)
T

This story is a sequel to Eclipse


Page needs a vacation.

He's not getting a vacation.

What he does get, is... how do they put it? Brand new exciting opportunities.
He never wanted to be a Prince, nor to rule. But he's stuck with the job, which means having ponies relying on him.
So he's doing his best.
Which would be fine, except ponies seem happy to keep finding brand new ways to make it harder for him.

Chapters (40)
T

This story is a sequel to Cold


Time flows differently, in the multitude of plains that make up the universe. Seconds here can be hours there... and hours here can be decades over there. There is, however, one universal constant among all time and space: Time never stops. Perhaps I counted on time as my ally when I cast that spell and dove into the past... if only I'd know just how cruel and unwavering it can really be.

Thirty years, I've tried... in most other worlds, it's probably been hundreds, but I've managed to keep track. Thirty years of searching, trying and trying again, desperately doing everything in my power to bring you back... and all that I've learned is that unless I make this choice, it's simply not possible... I hope you'll forgive me. I know that'll be hard... but maybe given enough time, you'll understand... -Twilight Sparkle

Discord- https://discord.gg/EQh5YzE8YE

Patreon- https://patreon.com/user?u=4398966

Chapters (18)
T

This story is a sequel to The Blueblood Papers: Bound By Blood


The Heartlands Campaign has reached a stalemate, and the Guards Division pauses to lick its wounds and prepare for the next offensive. While on leave, Prince Blueblood meets his hero, A. K. Yearling, and is dragged into a Daring Do story he would much rather have read.


Proofread and edited by Setokaiva

Chapters (4)
T

After a strange alien creature named Anon suddenly showed up in Equestria, it was only natural that Twilight Sparkle would want to help him adjust to his new environment. To do so, she enlists the help of local school teacher Ms. Cheerilee. With her guidance, Anon should be able to learn how to do things the "pony way," and before he knows it, he'll be another friendly face in Ponyville's growing community.

Unfortunately, Cheerilee isn't exactly a fan of the new human in town, nor is said human particularly happy to be under the tutelage of an elementary school teacher.

Is there any hope of them getting along?

Chapters (12)
T

Prince Blueblood is many things.

He's a Unicorn, He's royalty, He's a stallion, He's entitled, He's high-class, And most importantly he's not here right now.

If Blueblood isn't here right now, then who's that?

Well, That's Blueblood, the new Blueblood that is, a human in the body of Blueblood.

What will follow the actions of the new prince can be nothing short of disastrous.

Warning, this story contains Jokes, Magical Politics, a human-turned pony who doesn't know about MLP, Prince Blueblood doing Blueblood things, "Wine-Moms", and a very large sum of money.
You have been warned.


Featured for the first time two hours after being published :) 24/4/2023

Chapters (92)
T

This story is a sequel to Looking Glass


Page is stuck. He never wanted to be a Prince. But he can't just... stop. Ponies are depending on him now and he's feeling the pressure.

Being a Prince isn't all that it's cracked up to be. It's all work and so much responsibility. Ponies plot against you constantly. Luckily, sometimes it's for your own good.

Other times... not.


Big thanks to Arratra for betaing this one.

Chapters (56)
T

It shouldn't have been a big deal. Celestia was kidnapped or knocked out or just generally made to seem powerless by whatever idiot with ill intent decided to show up on a nearly weekly basis. As the mighty and immortal Sun Princess, she could escape at any time, but she was happy to play these little games. The daring rescues and bloodless battles gave her ponies such a sense of confidence and purpose!
But this one didn't go as planned. One small, stupid mistake got her thrown to the twisted reaches of the world-prison, Tartarus. Now alone, unarmed, and barely more than mortal, Celestia wakes in a living landscape where everything has every reason to hate her.
And, far worse, she has accidentally picked up a passenger.


Sidenote: This a repost (I tried to go through official channels, I promise!) of a story I wrote long, long ago on an account I foolishly deleted. Back in those days, Tartarus hadn't shown up in an actual episode yet. It's not exactly an alternate universe situation, but it has nothing to do with the canon portrayal of the place.

Super amazing cover art by Cold In Gardez.

Chapters (29)
T

Being somepony's friend can require accepting the... quirkier parts of their personality: something Rarity is all too aware of, especially when it comes to the work involved in accepting hers. So discovering that Fluttershy possesses -- shall we say, a 'special interest' -- simply means that the designer needs to accompany her to the convention. Just to make sure the pegasus isn't going to get hurt.

But a mare of dignity and taste does not casually wander into a 'special interest' gathering and emerge unaffected. And as it happens, neither does Rarity.

Rated C for Conifer Crackfic.


(Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.)

Chapters (1)