Chapter 18
The bathhouse had been nice. Also very affordable which was the point, why have it if everypony couldn't afford to use it often?
We certainly didn't want to have anypony having to resort to bathing in the river, something would eat them.
It did make me think a bit as I don't remember ever having paid for when I visited in the past. Going to have to fix that as a policy, if a normal pony would pay for something, then so shall I.
As an image thing if nothing else. A way to put my hoof down as well, they may want to treat me like royalty, but there is a limit, especially when not doing it may be taking actual food from their mouths.
I checked my bag again as I left the market.
Market had also been nice and I could have spent another couple of hours browsing it, but I had somepony to talk to so I had just picked up some snacks and a lizard on a stick.
I need to introduce lizard on a stick at the palace, that had been great! I'm fairly sure Sunny and Sparks would not appreciate it however.
Kisses were still banned for hours after I ate meat, damn it.
Smiling a bit to myself, I entered the Loft and headed for my little room, kicking the door closed behind me before I put the bag down on the floor. That done I took a leap, pushing off the desk and flipping over backwards, catching the rafter with my tail on the way.
I swung wildly, using my wings to quickly slow the pendulum down before I pulled my legs against my body and wrapped my wings around myself.
Yes.
I definitely need to sleep like this more often. Low in cuddle factor, but more comfortable than even a cloud.
Closing my eyes, I yawned before using a bit of magic to slip off into sleep.
My eyes opened again, this time taking in the sparkles of the seemingly infinite dream realm. Stretching, I allowed my dream self to revert to my real alicorn form before I got to business, checking on everyponies dreams.
I had not done that for a few nights, kinda difficult to do while working at a store, but Luna was gone for a thousand years and things didn't burst into flames.
As expected, things were not too bad.
I canceled some dreams, redirected others, checked on two that might have been but weren't Nightterrors.
Luna exited a dream to my left, "My Page," she said.
"My Sky," I answered, stealing a quick kiss as we crossed paths and then we continued on our errands. She onto more dreams and me seeking a specific one.
It didn't take long to find Candances dream and I was in luck. Usually it was tinged pink which means I wasn't touching it with a bargepole, but today it was a steady calm silvery blue. But I also knew that I should hurry and get in there before it changed.
Let's just say that even with the seeming difficulties alicorns seem to have to get foals, I'm surprised Flurry Heart does not have a dozen brothers and sisters by now.
I touched my horn to the silvery surface and slipped through, the dream formed around me and revealed soft grass, blue skies and trees. I blinked and looked around before I smiled, recognizing the place.
Finding Cadance was not difficult either, she was sitting with a canvas and paint, Shining Armor on a blanket on the grass, reading a book as she painted him.
I smiled, remembering a very similar scene with Luna and myself in the past before I sighed.
Damn, I miss that time.
Moving up, I checked the painting. Hmm. She's pretty good, actually. Assuming the dream isn't filling in blanks anyway.
Then I quickly backed off before tapping my hoof against the grass as I started to get closer again. Cadance stopped mid brushstroke before she blinked and looked around, "Wha- oh, Hi Page!"
I gave her a bow, arching my wing, "Princess Cadance," I said before standing up again and giving the dream projection of Shining a wave with my hoof, "Hey dude."
He waved back before going back to his book.
Cadance put her brush down, "So... dream?" she asked.
I nodded, "Indeed. I'm sorry to bother you, but I wondered if you would mind talking for a bit? I might need some advice."
Cadance quickly nodded and turned fully to me, "Of course, Page. About what?"
Sighing, I settled down facing her before pulling some tea out of nothing, setting down a pair of cups, "How do you handle the Crystal Empire? And the crystal ponies?" I asked and then filled her in on everything I had discovered.
Candance just listened, picking her cup up and sipped the tea as I explained.
When I finished, she frowned before she sighed, "I wish I could help, Page, but I never run into that sort of issue here. We have valuable exports and nobody fears Crystal ponies. And they see Equestria as having saved them from Sombra."
I sighed and nodded, "Alright, it was worth a shot."
"What does Twilight think?"
"...Haven't told her," I said, "I sent her and Sunny on a vacation before I started my investigation, before I had the idea to start one even. If I ask, she and Sunny will worry about it or even cut it short and return early and they deserve this break."
Cadance flicked one ear, "They won't be happy with you about that."
"Bucking tough. They haven't had a real vacation for years, so they're taking one."
Cadance smiled, "You're a good stallion, Page. I'm glad Twilight and you found each other."
"She seems to think it would have happened eventually even if we didn't get together by proxy first from our relationship with Sunny," I said and sipped my own tea.
Cadance looked thoughtful, "Possibly," she admitted, "You did move in a lot of the same circles. And considering the lifespans of alicorns, it's even likely. But considering Twilight is leaning quite a lot in the direction of mares, and you being you, it would likely have taken quite a lot longer."
"Hey," I protested, "That's..." I said before I frowned, "...uncomfortably accurate."
She grinned at me, "Learned to listen to me yet?"
"Absolutely not and you keep your nose out of things," I told her, sipping my own tea.
Cadance smirked, "Blank Page, alicorn of stubbornness. I do have an idea for your problem. You mentioned your idea of tourists?"
"I did," I agreed, "You have thoughts?"
"The Crystal Empire is not strictly Equestria. Also, my ponies look a bit different from regular Earth ponies. Our trade of crystals have made my people a fair bit of bits and I can assure you that quite a bit of them would find Nocturnis very exotic and exciting."
I slowly nodded, "That's a very long trip however."
"It is," Cadance admitted, "But it's a long trip from everywhere. And your thought of making the train trip part of the experience is a good one."
"It is, but we would need to buy a train," I pointed out.
Cadance nodded, "I may be convinced to invest," she said, "Buck, I'll drag Shining and Sunburst along on the first trip. I have been looking for an excuse to visit Twi and you guys again anyway."
I smiled at her, "Cadance, you're amazing."
"Thank you," she said with a small smirk, sipping her tea, "Don't you worry, we'll figure this out. I think it's a good idea actually."
"Speaking of good ideas, have anypony told you about Sanctuary yet?" I asked.
She looked at me with curiosity, "What's Sanctuary?"
"A shared dream realm of my own creation," I explained, "If you while you fall asleep think of the word 'sanctuary' you will end up there instead of a normal dream. And if they did the same, so would Shining and Sunburst."
Her jaw dropped a bit, "Oh!"
I smiled, "Time together, away from the palace, expectations, ponies..."
"...That sounds very nice," she admitted, "We'll be sure to try it tonight."
"Use a sleep spell, it makes it easier for a beginner to hold the word in their mind as they fall asleep," I advised her before getting to my hooves, "...And on that note, I have work to do."
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Also, crystal pylons for this big shield are from crystal ponies...
Wait what
Dangit, no bathhouse shenanigans
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DISCORD APPEARS OUT OF WORMHOLE IN HIVER'S HOME...
Discord:
...that was mean. I wanted a bathhouse scene! We ALL wanted a bathhouse scene!
Hiver: I said nothing was going to happen in the bathhouse. I was being my honest self.
Discord:
Stop enjoying seeing us frustrated in the comment section!
Hiver:
Oh don't worry. You will forget all about this once the BAD BAD happens. 
Discord:
Bad bad? WHAT BAD BAD?! What are you up to? 
Hiver:
Oh nothing. *sips tea loudly*
Cadances
Cadance
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*Sgt Murphy then proceeds to pop up and waves to Discord*
Hey Boss! The plan is in effect. Soon the Chaos will be flowing in Very Soon!
Last story we had a lot of fun in the comment section with Sanctuary
Blank Page will fix that in time
Remember it when Cadance becomes singel eventually...
Blank Page is a former human turned pony...
Zeezzkekeezzkzk has not enough Changeling shenanigans yet.
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"Ah, but that was before I found my passion for Dance. Now I am Can Dance Cadenza!!!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p47fEXGabaY
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Not available for a few nation to view, including Germany...
11859860
Livin' La Vida Loca is banned? I had no idea...
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Dito, seem strange. But it is how it is.
Have a facehugger for your troubles:
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSpYAgv5QprzeUuVPFDFG5J4atMYuN_Bny6rA&usqp=CAU
And the solution for its aftermath:
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/97b14c7a-fa65-4c15-9d0b-b6f1c938fbac/d4g78t3-ff91f57c-5691-4772-b23b-aabfd35d7696.jpg/v1/fit/w_828,h_394,q_70,strp/my_little_pony_colonial_marine_by_corruptionsolid_d4g78t3-414w-2x.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9MTIwMCIsInBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzk3YjE0YzdhLWZhNjUtNGMxNS05ZDBiLWI2ZjFjOTM4ZmJhY1wvZDRnNzh0My1mZjkxZjU3Yy01NjkxLTQ3NzItYjIzYi1hYWJmZDM1ZDc2OTYuanBnIiwid2lkdGgiOiI8PTI1MjIifV1dLCJhdWQiOlsidXJuOnNlcnZpY2U6aW1hZ2Uub3BlcmF0aW9ucyJdfQ.2MomKUG3MymajfnMUt5QeKduqcaJQ5bxTdAu2cceu7o
Maybe a epic fight as well:
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTzPKgH3gGziUs0rdoDUdT1jTGaaw76qYFLcA&usqp=CAU
11859831
Blank Page:
"I am having fun, life is good."
Murphy answer:
Question about sanctuary, is the spell that lets that work have a "valid user" list, or does any random pony who happens to fall asleep thinking about that word get pulled in?
If it's the latter, I can imagine some interesting hijinks, but if it is a restricted list, then that might imply a number of useful security features that other spells could use. Example rooms that only authorized ponys may enter or ways to enforce contracts that are unforgeable.
A recollection of fun from last stories comment section:
camo.fimfiction.net/4yrHO_MPkfE_S76Jnn_ay2aekqoyMn1ftZMy1u6yXUY?url=https%3A%2F%2Fderpicdn.net%2Fimg%2Fview%2F2014%2F3%2F29%2F587644.png
camo.fimfiction.net/AVRVz8mIR-ta4iadGf6pFDHTmguWqY-TVNkD0NQQls8?url=https%3A%2F%2Fderpicdn.net%2Fimg%2Fview%2F2018%2F9%2F4%2F1824315.png
camo.fimfiction.net/xzb_CPsKbTVn-ghk5o9SQLmSa5OhME7cvB_KZNaTXUs?url=https%3A%2F%2Fpre03.deviantart.net%2F3604%2Fth%2Fpre%2Fi%2F2012%2F041%2F4%2Fa%2Funlimited_friendship___by_shrubninja-d4pan89.jpg
Luna:
"Its a golem from the future..."
Page:
"What?"
Luna:
"Apparently Twilight Sparkle accidentally created smart golem and somecreature hacked their control matrix and turned them against Equestria!"
Page:
"You got to be kidding me..."
Celestia:
"Also there was apparently another Golem that was sent for your protection."
Page:
"This can't be happening..."
Celestia:
"Apparently it was send here by the Alicorn resistance group of all your children to safeguard you from future attacks."
Page:
Cadance:
"The golem is also female~♡"
Page:
camo.fimfiction.net/a043oQ7o9_70QfEhxjT3Z_N1vG6sWLbMq3o1-7Amwh8?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.pinimg.com%2Foriginals%2F61%2F67%2F3b%2F61673b03ff44618a42b19f6cdd90f5e0.jpg
Would be funny if Celestia & Luna started to mock the nobility like that for a day, better yet!
Hire a news paper for it!
Example:
Nobility:
"If a Alicorn can bleed, are they really devine entity's?"
Celestia:
"If Nobility is really better by birth, should they not bleed blue blood?"
Nobility:
"What makes Blank Page better than us?"
Luna:
"He isn't a self centered, brown nosing, cowards running away from any threat to his beloved and nation.
Further he literally sacrificed his life to defeat Tirek and Harmony/the Universe itself was so impressed with him it made him a towards time immortal blessed stallion with stamina like no other!"
Nobility:
"To mutch detail!"
Luna:
"O am just getting started..."
camo.fimfiction.net/-kcEqsvO1EnHPdWtcdGHRPmhyG8lYo6oIOWvPE8iDo8?url=https%3A%2F%2Fderpicdn.net%2Fimg%2F2014%2F3%2F15%2F576165%2Ffull.png
Celestia:
"That is redicules, even Alicorns bleed. Next they say something stupid like 'moving the sun and moon' is only 'fancy magic', because 100 - 300 Unicorn can cast group magic to do it, even if it is done with a lot of effort! What my sister and myself do every day and night cycel with the ease of lifting a barrel of cake frosting."
Chrysalis:
"That was oddly specific."
Luna:
"I am currently planning a official test for the general intelligence of the nobel ponies, if they are to retarded they get stripped of titel for the safety of Equestria."
Cadance via Crystal ball communication:
"Fun fact: The Crystal Empire has that as a regular occurrence, every 10 years ones."
*Many noble ponies in Canterlot/Manehatten/Cloudsdale have suddenly a bad feeling about something*
Chrysalis:
"This is where the fun begins..."
Skitter:
"Its like a Train accident going to happen before your eyes... you can't look away and wish for some snacks to see the outcome."
Kevin:
"Funny, i was thinking the story Prince Blank Page is writing named 'Purge' isn't out yet. A interesting story about 'purging the corruption out of any social level'."
Celestia:
"O, hello Kevin. Here for some tea?"
Chrysalis:
"You have tea with the Sun princess?"
Kevin:
"On occasion, she like my tea biscuits."
Luna:
"You should meet up with us more often sir Kevin, we shall not be deprived of your biscuits any longer if my sister is singing their praises."
Cadance via Crystal ball communication:
"That's just not fair, i want some tooooo..."
Chrysalis:
"Can we get back to the topic?"
Celestia:
"What did we talk about again?"
Kevin:
"Idiot test of the nobel class and consequently purging them?"
Celestia:
"O right... Luna, i have faith in you."
Luna:
"This is where the fun begins..."
[After the meeting]
Chrysalis:
"Explain Kevin!"
Kevin:
"Royals love my tea biscuits" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Chrysalis:
"I should make you a Changeling King, Skitter could need someone as persuasive as you!"
Kevin:
"But all i want is baking biscuits and drinking tea..."
Chrysalis:
"Snuggelbugs and tea biscuits... we will rule the world through snuggeling and tea biscuits."
*Queen Chrysalis starts drooling at the idea*
There is blood to be payed for the blood spilled!
camo.fimfiction.net/54cUc3KGb7eJnN2lCja6dRy-aBYK7urePgE2ZfICJ7s?url=http%3A%2F%2Fpre02.deviantart.net%2F4701%2Fth%2Fpre%2Fi%2F2014%2F167%2F3%2F2%2Fsith_luna_by_ncmares-d7ml1yf.jpg
And
camo.fimfiction.net/wqitWBQyY7rLazHxp5Pf544SZLfeufF_dCEsYZwvTYA?url=http%3A%2F%2Fimg0.joyreactor.cc%2Fpics%2Fpost%2Ffull%2Fmy-little-pony-%25D1%2584%25D1%258D%25D0%25BD%25D0%25B4%25D0%25BE%25D0%25BC%25D1%258B-Princess-Celestia-royal-1246029.jpeg
Time to deliver justice with a lightsaber ♤
camo.fimfiction.net/u6z9otxjvx-EtpYVD9v9VPuD3AJi7tED912pJF_L1Q8?url=http%3A%2F%2Fi2.kym-cdn.com%2Fphotos%2Fimages%2Foriginal%2F000%2F687%2F970%2F993.jpg
Cadance is coming...
Minotaur Ambassador:
"Why is the Sun and Moon rising and lowering in half hour intervals?"
Griffon Ambassador:
"What is the meaning of the 5 minute Eclipse every hour?"
Queen Chrysalis:
"Blank Page..."
Abesinian Ambassador:
"The new Alicorn Prince is responsible for this?!"
Somepony named Naysay:
"Obviously he is doing unspeakable things to our pure Alicorn rulers!"
Queen Chrysalis:
"Unspeakable? What is unusual in Blank Page attempting to create a heir for the Sun & Moon princesses?"
Somepony sputtering non verbal to understand vocal diarrhea named Naysay:
"This backstabbing little..."
Queen Chrysalis:
"Backstabbing of the finest kind, repeatedly and most insistently. Carnal perfection ~♡"
Hypogriffon Ambassador:
"Huh... Neat... ... ... sooo will the Guardtower containing Celestias descendants gain new blood?"
Wanne be noble Naysay:
"The What in where... since when?!"
Princess Skitter:
"Dawww... I can feel their love from here, i wonder if Cadance knows..."
*Somewhere in the Crystal Empire castle*
Cadance:
"F-I-N-A-L-L-Y!"
Spike & Talon:
Welcome to Nocturnis, for everycreatures sake here are the rules ro follow at all times. Not following get you eaten! Or worse somecreature else.
Here we go, ready your notebook:
1. Don't go anywhere below the Village alone, ideally in a group of three. So the idiot that get biten get somecreature to haul his flank to safety, while the other fends of what ever got the drop on him.
2. There is no boring patrol shift, only the one where some get biten or otherwise wounded and the ones that got lucky.
3. Mangos and other Thestral delicacies are not to be hold in duty pouches, Thestrals will otherwise be likely to swarm you and some gets biten.
4. Make sure you report in any disturbance in the farming areas, we have discovered that the protection dome of magic isn't 100% ' something with sharp teeth and tries to get you eaten' proof.
5. Herding is pretty mutch a given here, but Thestral get breeding privileges. Literally in threat of dying out here folk...
6. Nopony is to run if for a 5 minute quicky while on guard duty, we are literally surrounded by very hungry predators and neglected duty can end in eaten ponies.
7. Changeling have by official royal decrees been dubed 'Snuggelbugs. You might endulge in your off-duty time as mutch you want.
But if you feel sad afterwards or melancholy, see a doctor for suspected oversnacking Changelings.
Especially the one that like to enjoy the finer aspect of Changelings relations...
8. Batpony is a slure, don't use it.
Batpone is a word of endorsement of their cute nature, it is fine to use.
9. No there are no vampponies, the blood drinking curse has been lifted by Twilight and Midnight Sparkle.
10. Trying to score with a purple smart Alicorn get you on our shit list, you don't want to end up on two dragons shit list. If 'we bite' you 'will' remember it forever.
Also they are already in relationships.
Blank Page might also want to bite you afterwards.
11. Fluttershy is a sweetheart, but her friends here in Nocturnis are simply terrifying. If you hear talk about cute predators that are perfectly save if you behave...
Just ask for reinforcements, it's the only sane thing to do.
12. Please refrain from accepting 'quickies on duty', the Snuggelbug population likes to enduldge on new food opportunities.
13. Changelings will enduldge your fantasies in private, but if you brag about having experienced the depths of pleasure with purple smart via Ling, we will bite you. Keep your Ling antics to yourself or at least out of our hearing range.
14. Angel Bunny has no good ideas, refrain from supporting any of his ideas.
14.a) Especially if it sounds like a good idea.
14b) even if it sounds to be perfectly safe or without drawbacks.
16. Discord is a resident in Nocturnis, ask him for favors at your own perils.
Guardspony: "What happened to 15?"
Talon: "Somepony noticed!"
Spike: "Note that Guard down for good attention, he is worth advanced courses, because he probably will be under the 'not eaten before rotation ends' list."
*Spike & Talons filly friend nods and write the Guardponies name down*
17. Sky melons are to be consumed in the canteen, not horded in your private quarters! If you get eaten because you acted like a idiot or simply got unlucky they will go bad before somepony can dispose of them and everything will reek for a week. Just don't!
18. In Nocturnis are four kind of creatures:
- The ones that don't get eaten alive or dead.
- The ones that only get eaten partially and learn that Nocturnis was rules for reasons.
- The ones that go missing because they're thought to let their guard down in farming patrol duty, being idiotic in general or forget/ignored the 3 group rule.
- The ones on our shitlist. Don't become the last three things. You will not like it.
19. Blank Page hates paper work, he even tried to outlaw it on 6 separately occurring occasions.
Please keep to the protocol in filling them out.
20. Don't be a idiot, because idiots don't survive Nocturnis.
Another Guardspony:
"So what is rules 15?!"
Spike & Talon filly friend note down this second guard for advanced duties because he probably didn't get himself eaten by the end of his Nocturnis rotation.
In conclusion:
Hivers storytelling is awesome, but his chapter by chapter inspired readers come up with even more random stuff
11859793
The comment section may be exactly why that part was glossed over
11859879
Weird.
But then, I wouldn't exactly be surprised if an idiot Berlin bureaucrat somehow thought it was a Nazi propaganda song.
Page: "GYAAAAHHHH!
"
Is that you? What are you doing here?
" *slyly* "Have you come to join the fun?
"
how is that even possible!!?
"
"
What else should I be expecting for a normal non-sexual dream???
"
Luna should have warned you. I'm very different from other ponies. My dreams with stallions are all blue. When I'm with mares, they're pink, and when I'm with both, they're purple. My normal non-sexual dreams are all green. 
"
"
"
"
" *then makes mental note* "be sure to sneak into Cadance's dreams when they're PINK 
"
*scream shocks Cadance into realizing she's dreaming*
Cadance: "PAGE!?
Page: "Absolutely not! I was expecting to pop into a normal, non-sexual dream! Instead--you're--doing with fifteen stallions--ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Cadance: "Wait...what color dream did you see before coming in? Blue, right?
Page: "Uh--YEAH!
Cadance: "Oh, *hee-hee*
Page: "Okay...that's just weird.
Cadance: "Meh. It's just how I'm wired. So, if you're not here to join in, what did you want to talk about?
Page: "I'll---come back later--when you're not busy.
*Page leave Cadance's dream realm*
Page *sudders in horror*: "whew!
I... Kind of, don't agree with tourism idea. Not without making 100% sure that Nocturnis, and the trip TO Nocturnis is safe. All you need is one, ONE accident to make the entire venture completely null in the eyes of the outside public.
Nice
11860044
11859876
It's probably just weird rights issues, not anything to do with it being problematic.
11860077
A valid point.
First impressions are everything in advertising, and it usually takes quite a while of smooth sailing before a "bad" event can be looked at as a 'rare unfortunate accident', and not a 'I knew this bad idea would fail'.
The other issue is making the trip part of the "experience". I'm thinking something like The Orient Express (
minus the murder) would work, where you have a fancy dining car with spectacular views and services. The problem with that is the bits, and also to consider how dangerous the route would be.Wonder if Page might land a Griffon eventually...
Griffon want some loving to!
Hey Hiver, what do the healing levels of Nocturnis look like?
Do they have a hospital yet?
Healing magic can be insane to us, but like medical science can be to others.
And Sunburst?? :'(
11860764
I think he is fine with his wife and his almost 3 girlfriends.
11860988
Good point... but remember... the week as 7 days
Also:
camo.fimfiction.net/0kF8GwtPDuGWfenluLf5vGaBfZPPzvKSoUsfa8u7168?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.ytimg.com%2Fvi%2F-rPYF_LJmgs%2Fmaxresdefault.jpg
The more waifus, the bigger the nightly gymnastics
11861080
no uh 🤓
11860044
Oh goodie. Now I have my imagination producing images of the song playing while a musical number by Nazi's is performed Weird Al style, like that scene from "The Mask" where he performed Cuban Pete with the police.