• Member Since 17th Sep, 2012

Crude Dude


When i rule the world, i will reenact Nero's reign; the survivors will be given cookies.

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Found 225 stories in 233ms

Total Words: 10,124,919
Estimated Reading: 4 weeks

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Princess Celestia is losing control of her political power. The system is slowly crumbling due to the inverse relationship between harmony and "freedom". With the invitation of television sets, the internet, and instant coffee machines, "freedom" becomes the preferred theme of the Celestian empire as opposed to harmony.

With no other options (or perhaps due to a stroke of genius), Princess Celestia brings a self proclaimed expert on "freedom" to Equestria along with his entire family to create a new show with familiar roots: The Coltbert Report.

How will his family handle the new Equestrian life? Will Stephen Coltbert be able to return harmony to the land with his mixture of satire and wit? Only time and hundreds of episodes will tell.

Join Stephen Coltbert as he provides the conservative viewpoint on Equestria so that you don't have to.

Cover art by Stinkehund.

Featured on Equestria Daily: 1/16/2013

Chapters (6)
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Expand for links to readings, fan stuff, the tumblr, and more!

When Twilight Sparkle slipped beneath the covers last night, everything had been fine. She had friends whom she loved, a teacher she adored, and a bright future ahead of her. But when she woke up, her blankets and quilts had been replaced by hospital gowns and padded restraints.

Everything is wrong and nothing makes sense; even her friends have changed. The doctors keep telling her that she is sick, that none of it was real and that it was all in her head. Yet she remembers a life far beyond the hospital walls. She couldn't have made it all up on her own. They must be lying… right?


Links

Ask Asylum Twilight - Still updating regularly!
Equestria Daily
TVTropes
Asylum Fan Group
The Tartarus Project
Russian Translation
The Asylum 20,000 View Spectacular Stage Show!


Fan Works

May contain spoilers!

Art:
Asylum Cover by conicer
Twilight and Twilight Smiles by dreamingnoctis
Mirror Twilight and Plague Doctor by Jaestring / BloodGoldWings
Twilight Smiles and Doctor AJ by conicer
Nurse Ratchet and Silas and What's in the mirror? by Archonix
Doctor AJ Sketch by Archonix | Colored and vectored version by ReFro82
Twilight's Asylum by Khan the Cake Lover
Smilight by HappySwitch
Twilight Waking Up by Dombrus
Fan Art by toxicdemon10
Asylum Twilight by Madness-With-Reason
Asylum Fluttershy and Asylum Ch 26 by Downburst-Backspace
Twilight and her Twin by v747
Birdgirl by sirValter


Readings and Videos:
Asylum Animated Trailer Video by formuladash
Reading by Gammarobot (SugarCubeRadio): All Chapters Here
Reading by Ender Brony: All Chapters Here
Reading by VisualPony: All Chapters Here
Reading by MelancholyIguana: All Chapters Here
Fan Trailer by Kaidan: Asylum FanFic Trailer Cuckoo's Nest


Related and Inspired Works

Sanctuary by Kaidan
Broadhoof Files: Dr. Humors by TypewriterError
Broadhoof Files: Corporal Phalanx Spear (Ret.) by Phalanx Spear
A Hearth's Warming Tragedy by Seven Fates


Thanks from the Author

A special thanks to Breath of Plagues, Rex Ivan,
ChudoJogurt, Cynewulf, Death the Kid, Selbi, PrinceDolph, Blahman2816, Queue, and Gage!


Guest OCs

Axan Zenith - Dr. Dreamer
Dratini4 - Way Finder
psychicscubadiver - Bright Mind
Velkaden - Dream Chaser
Reese - Silver Glow
Viola Heartstrings - Clover
Archonix - Spinney Whiteacre

Chapters (27)
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Applebloom is tired of being treated like a filly! She's a big pony, darn it! She wants the respect of her brother and sister, so she decides to take a drink of something definitely not meant for fillies. What happens afterward will convince her to never touch her brother's apple whisky ever again.


The following piece was written before season 3 and I'm not going back to change it, because this story flies in the face of canon anyway. Every dumb joke or tired brony-ism you can think of has been used in this fic for comedic purposes. Leave you offended-ness at the door, and enter, THE APPLE ZONE.
P.S. if you find I parodied a fic of yours within, it's because I liked it, not because I'm trying to make fun of it. This is meant to mock the fandom as a whole, as in, all of us. I'm not Blueshift, so it may not be that funny, but I regret nothing.

Chapters (1)
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Isaac Clarke awakens on Titan Station in the middle of a new outbreak. Will his faltering mind allow him to overcome his guilt and pain, or will he forever remain captive to the machinations of the Marker?

Rated Teen for strong language and violence. Disclaimer: I do not own Dead Space 2 or MLP:FiM. Also, some dialogue is taken from the game.

Contact Setokaiva for spin-off collabs.

Chapters (12)
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(REWRITE IN PROGRESS)

After a weekend spent in Canterlot, Twilight Sparkle arrives home to find an odd scroll in her saddlebags. In the following days Twilight is plagued by terrifying nightmares, and horrific visions from a life not her own. Can Twilight Sparkle resist the Nightmare, or will she fall prey to the darkness?

Chapters (28)
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Robert Parker is a 24 year old ex-web developer living in New York city. In the wake of the conversion movement, he has seemingly lost everything. Haunted by the same nightmare every night, he soon realizes that he must make a choice.


To those unfamiliar with the Conversion Bureau: it is a scenario created by an author named blaze in which Ponies either appear in the human world or have lived beside humans without incident for millennia. One day, in the face of all the damage humanity has done to its world, the ponies offer a solution: undergo conversion to become a pony and allow the world to be inundated with Equestria's influence: thus healing it and bring forth a golden age.

Many different authors have taken many different approaches to this idea, all of them are worth checking out.

http://www.ponychan.net/chan/fic/res/53616.html (The current thread)
http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/04/conversion-bureau-compilation.html (The compilation post on EQDaily. *NOT UPDATED*)

Chapters (7)
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Since her return and rescue, Princess Luna has been looking for some way to properly honor the six mares who saved her from herself, but nothing she has been able to think of has seemed meaningful enough to repay her saviors.

Nothing, at least, until she spends Nightmare Night in Ponyville, and gets to actually know the six ponies to whom she owes such a great debt. She realizes she enjoys their company, and wishes for them to spend more time with her, that she might grow closer to them.

So, in accordance with many fine and ancient traditions, and after thinking it over for a good...couple of hours, easy, she proclaims that she shall marry all six of them. Oh, and that Twilight will be marrying Celestia, too.

Now would be the appropriate time for everypony to panic.

--Cover Art Courtesy of Zemious--
--Editing Graciously Provided By BronyWriter--

NB - The sex tag is in place for sexual situations and suggestions; the story is, and shall remain, free of explicit sex.

Chapters (8)
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The Rainbow Factory has been a site of mystery and rumor. But to those who work there it is a place of death. But now is the time to end the genocide. Now is the time to rise up. Now begins the Fall of the Rainbow Factory.

This is my first Fan fic...Each chapter will get better as you go because I learn more as I do each chapter. Please don't forget to comment so that I know how I did and how I can improve.
Go easy on me.

Chapters (8)
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Twilight Sparkle has been convinced that kidnapping YOU is the solution to saving Equestria! While this should be a dream come true (going to Ponyville, meeting Twilight Sparkle, etc..) There's just one catch...

You don't want to be a pony... At least not like this!

Chapters (23)
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So, I'm in "Equestria," and normally, I would be okay with this. But, I have no idea how to get home, and worse, I seem to be shifted over to random "Equestrias" at seemingly random intervals. And these alternate worlds I'm doomed to wander? They're the worlds of fanfictions.
So, in short, this is the story of me and my wits against the imaginations of the community of my fellow bronies.
I'm screwed.
-----------------------------
So I heard you like pony fanfictions...
Rated Teen for some violence, language, and some possible adult themes later on.
If you have a fic, or want to suggest a fic to send my poor, suffering OC to, I'm open to suggestions. I do have a general story line I want to follow, so don't be too upset if I don't include your suggestions.
On a related note, there are some fics that I flat out will not do, which can be summed up as "Clop or Cupcakes," meaning that I won't do a fic that has clop in it, or gratuitous gore for the sake of gratuitous gore. I may reference some grimdark fics, but that's it.
I will always try to ask permission before using your fic. If you see I've used your fic without having asked you first, that means I wasn't able to figure out a good way to contact you, and I apologise.
Also, I would appreciate it greatly if you would agree to look over my stuff before I publish it, to ensure I don't mangle your story too badly.

Chapters (4)