And they're off!
In that second of Twilight’s arrival, time seemed like it stopped. You could see Applejack’s pupils slowly dilate in shock, and Roseluck’s jaw begin to drop. You instinctively begin to lunge forward, but [RED ALE-] *ZAP* your muscles suddenly freeze, and you collapse to the ground like a sack of potatoes.
Very tazed potatoes.
“Twi-liaht! What in tarnation are yew-” *ZAP ZAP ZAP*
From your position on the ground you see the other mares are frozen in midair, suspended with Twilight’s magic.
You strain your eyes and can barely make out Twilight’s face, as she smiles a biiiit too wide, and with her ear flicking says, “Hiiii GIRLS!!” Twilight levitates you so you’re facing her upside down, and your eyes go wide as you catch a full view of the very… frazzled mare’s face. 
“Did you knoooow how long it’s taken to find you?” You open your mouth to answer, but she abruptly cuts you off. “ONE THOUSAND, TWO HUNDRED, AND THIRTEEN JUMPS.” Twilight starts frantically pacing in front of you. “THAT’s how many jumps it took to find you. MANYOFWHICHWEREAWKWARD.” You open your mouth to take a breath, but are abruptly cut off again. “Do you KNOW how many stallions take showers out of one thousand, two hundred and thirteen? FARTOOMANY!”
Roseluck opens her mouth, and Twilight *snaps* it shut. “NOIDIDNOTENJOYIT!”
Twilight turns back to you, and fixes you with her dilated pupils and bloodshot eyes. “So I’m never going to leave you again! EVER. Because I’m NOT going through that again!”
Applejack yells while still caught in Twilight’s magic, “TWI-LIAHT! What are yew doing? Are you foal-napping males now? Is THIS what mah friend does now?”
Twilight unsettlingly giggles at Applejack. “And you’re any better? This isn’t the first time you tried to save a stallion, and have him ‘try the Apple family goods’...”
Applejack gasps in shock. “Twilight! Ah… You- Ah’d never dream of it” She says, scrunching up her face. 
Twilight then glances at Roseluck. “And you… don’t worry! You won’t remember a thing! Mares, can you help me out a bit?”
You spot two mares who you just didn’t see for some reason walk up from behind Twilight dressed in impeccable black suits, and wearing some of the coolest shades you’ve ever seen. They silently walk up to Roseluck, and right as she starts to protest you think you see a camera flash, and suddenly Roseluck walks off quietly with the mares, looking a bit dazed..
Twilight then turns back to face you. “So ‘America’… You’ve caused me quite a few problems, so that’s why I decided that I’m going to keep you!”
You nervously start sweating.
“Because, what in life worth having ever came easy? And trust me, tracking you down was HARD! But now I’ve got you!” [RED ALERT] She suddenly fires several rapid fire spells into you. “Annnnnnddd.. Done! Now you’ve got several proximity and tracking spells! Your odds of escaping are aproximatly three thousand, seven hundred and twenty to one!.”
You glare at Twlight and weakly point a finger at her. “Never tell me the odds.”
Rainbow Dash decides to stop struggling against Twilight’s magic, and participate! “Hey, Twilight! Let him go! This isn’t sportsmarelike!”
Twilight’s eyes sparkle. “Oh course!!! SPORT!
Suddenly the magic disappears, and you fall flat on your head. *WACK* “OWWW!”
“Opps! Sorry ‘Merica!” Twilight giggles out. “Anyways… That’s a perfect idea! ‘Merica. I’ll let you go IF… You can escape the three of us!”
Your eyes open in shock as you grimace on the ground. “Wait.. What?”
Twilight grins even bigger and starts pacing around your prone form. “It’s SO simple! It’s even traditional! In ancient times if multiple mares claimed a stallion and their claims clashed, it was solved with a simple race! If the stallion is caught by a mare within five minutes, then he’s that mare’s stallion! But if he got away from all the mares, he would be allowed his freedom!”
You see a tiny glint of hope, after all they call you “America” here. You’ve got to try for freedom. Because Freedom is the only way!
“Deal.” You confidently say. Then you spot your mistake.
Rainbow confidently flaps her wings and winks at you. Applejack sinks her hooves into the earth and assumes a running position. Twilight simply charges a spell while humming to herself.
“Now… WAIT A SECOND!” You blurt out, gesturing for the mares to wait. “How is this fair? I don’t have earth pony strength, pegasus flight, or a unicorns magic! How is this fair?” You yell desperately. The three mares look at eachother, and you suddenly can almost see a light-bulb appear over Twilight’s head.
“AH-HA! A nullify spell! That’ll work!” Twilight charges her horn up while explaining. “Merica, when I cast this spell, for 5 minutes all pony magic, and our natural abilities… will be nullified for five minutes. When we get our powers back, then the contest is over!”
You get to your feet, “Well I suppose that would be-”
Twilight charges up her horn, and with a deafining blast unleashes her spell! [RED ALERT] As you recover you hear a guitar unexpectedly start playing in the background. All three mares simultaneously LUNGE at you. You lunge backward and take off running, dodging between the Apple Family trees. Glancing behind you, you spot Rainbow sprinting behind you and gaining on you, with Twilight jogging calmly behind her.
Wait. Where’s Applejack?
*Woaow, woaow WHOAOW*
Suddenly your feet are YANKED out from under you, and as you bash your head against a tree root you realize that Applejack’s lasso'd your feet! You grab onto the nearby tree trunk, but the other mares are almost on top of you!
In an adrenaline fueled burst of energy you LAUNCH yourself at a low hanging branch… and catch it!
You pull yourself into the tree, and looking down see Rainbow and Twilight run up to the base of your tree, and spot Applejack CLIMBING THE ROPE ATTACHED TO YOUR LEG.
You’ve got nothing to cut the rope with, and Applejack is getting REALLY close to your leg but you’v-
OF COURSE!
“Hey AJ!” You shout. “So what are you gonna do when you catch me!?”
“Oh ah-m gonna… Horseapples.” Applejack opened her mouth to answer you… and letting go of the rope plummets to the base of the tree, narrowly missing the climbing Rainbow Dash.
RAINBOW DASH. CRAP.
You quickly remove the rope from your legs, and Rainbow’s outstretched hoof barely misses you as you FLING yourself into the closet safe spot, the Apple Family barn’s roof.
You grab onto the rain gutter and slide down to the ground, but Applejack rounds the corner of the barn at full speed, and you FLING yourself upward and scramble onto the roof. You run to the other side of the roof, and see Rainbow climbing onto the roof from a nearby tree branch. Backpedaling you turn around and SPRINT for the loft doors, and just as you open them…
“Tag. You’re it!” Twilight Sparkle grins playfully as she tuggs on the front of your shirt. Panting for air, you collapse to the ground, and give up. Applejack runs around the corner, and skids to a stop. “Ah’ll- … Oh. Yew got him already…”
Rainbow Dash grunts as she pulls herself up the side of the barn, and groans, flopping down on the top of the roof in discouragement. “Awwww… Come-on…”.
You raggedly pant, trying to catch your breath as you look at Twilight. “So- *gasp* now- *cough* what?”
Twilight smiles at you. “First… I’ll prove to you that you’ll actually love it here! So… how do you feel about a trip to Canterlot?”
(END CHAPTER)
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really? i was really hoping he would get away and get his freedom i dont think i would like it there either where males have no rights and no freedom
What? Bull crap! No one catches America!
He'll never get away from Celestia.
That was a fun chapter. I do so love full on running scenes.
Ok, you're on a farm, in the vicinity of a barn where presumably at least some basic tools are kept, and at this point chivalry is out the door and their pony powers are disabled. If I were this guy, screw running, I'd have gone for the first blunt instrument I could find and start bashing some pony heads! After all, it's rather hard to pursue someone if you have a concussion.
You know I like the idea of going to Equestria, but being turned into a pony... yeah, not my cup of tea.
Also, I think once America gets to Canterlot, he'll try and escape again, but this time Celestia will be on his tail.
I fucking love this story, how you include the photos and music and everything it helps me picture everything better. It's a really funny story I love it.
Pony mare- your game is through,
Cos now you have to answer to,
AMERICA! Fuck yeah!
I know it's crap, but I had to do it...
Short.
RAPE
Rape
How is Twilight holding the shirt? I can't believe America gave up like that, I probably would've twisted out of her mouth by spinning and stuff or just actually losing the shirt. Grabbing the shirt does not count as being caught, but he did give up because he was out of breath though. Great Celestia is going to say no to America's refusal to change unless he can somehow outsmart her or escape from her.
wait
if he escapes in canterlot
im calling a rooftop run
Awwww, you killed off Roseluck :(. Roseluck X 'Merica OTP
You know what you should have 'Merica do?
Have him look Twilight dead in the eyes and say, "My mom misses me." straightfaced and cold as ice.
I'd like to see how she reacts to that. Maybe chip away a little bit more of her faith in Celestia.
at this point i'd be spewing expletives out of sheer frustration if i were in his position
any place where you have less rights is not a fun place to be
4002917
Yeah that wouldn't sit well with anyone.
4003652
Or you know since they still don't have their abilities snap their necks? America will never lose it's freedom without at least killing for it.
3475190 NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Brother! Why?!
I think Luna should get some American 'love'
4002917
Author, listen to this guy.
He's got the golden trump card here for poor old 'Merica.
very good chapter. I think Celestia will try mind wiping him. but.... I think he should tell Twilight she needs to hear from granny smith first.
4014420 I think It would hurt twilight to much to do that.
4007683 restart the lunar rebellion?
3997530 and when they wake up. they could decides to A come after you without holding back a bit. or B. have you killed for assaulting a mare
3998475 Crazy mare your game is through.
4014776
Right, because A: It REALLY looked like Twilight was holding back before, and B: Compared to life as a mind-wiped sex-toy, it sounds like it'd be worth taking my chances.
4014776 Very nice. I wish I had though of that!
Here's a new title for the next chapter you would like "Ponies, Canterlot, Tourism oh my"
Here's a new title for the next chapter you would like "Ponies, Canterlot, Tourism oh my"
3997530
Here's how I'd plan the situation:
Since basically any brony knows how Applejack will catch someone when she's in pursuit,(except poor old ignorant 'Merica) I'd immediately watch for a lasso, while keeping tabs on Dash and Twi. Once I see that blasted lasso, I'd either attempt to dodge it or catch it mid-air and throw it at Dash or Twilight,momentarily distracting Applejack and the victim of the throw. I would then look behind me for any obstacles, backpedal quickly while raising my middle fingers and singing "Can't Touch This" while the remaining pony runs after me. If they try to grab me while I'm performing my taunting backwards walking, I would dodge and start flat out running...
Then again, the chances of that succeeding are slim to none. But still worth the laugh every time I read it XD
4014776 Well.... Given America's track record... and America (the one in Equestria)'s record, that would be a joyride for everyone
How could he possibly let all those poor stallions suffer? 
4017023 hehe. maybe some of them don't suffer? they enjoy it?
also, this story leans in a very heavy direction from how things are in the show. this fic is to funny to dislike however. the thing is, if society in equestria was this way, hoity toity and fancy pants wouldn't be in their positions/careers.
and blue blood would not be able to act the way he does, even if he in royalty. (althou I would love to see him punished in this equestria's male role policies for what he did at the gala.)
I'm not wanting to get into an argument on this so lets please not?
4017044 Haha I feel ya. Sometimes you just love to hate a situation
4017055
exactly. I have read some stories where stallions are treated like this and it just rubs me the wrong way but this. this story does it right!
4017044 Great points! Keep in mind, this is a story... and isn't MLP as classically imagined. :)
4020370
understand able!
4021743 Honestly? I'm worried I can't write either of them... Pinkie is so hyper that I just don't understand her. It's like she's in a different dimension altogether! As for Fluttershy (don't hate me readers!) she's kinda uninteresting to me. She's nice... and that's about it to me.
As of yet I just don't get her character. (Possibly because I'm an extrovert, and not shy at all...)
4062513 Thanks! Though If you want some REALLY good fics? Check these guys out!
http://www.fimfiction.net/user/Aegis+Shield
http://www.fimfiction.net/index.php?view=category&user=5235
Also, I'm really sorry about Pinkie... I mean she's so much fu... AAAAAIEEE-
fc07.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2012/014/9/c/pinkie_pie___4th_wall_by_cptofthefriendship-d4mdrlt.png
Author no pressure but this story gave me please-updateitis.
4105641 Working on it! It's just that I'm working long hours, and so that combined with my evening workout doesn't leave me much time to write.
Plus I'm trying to decide between two VERY different arcs that I could take the story in..
But here's a spoiler for how the story is going to be like for some of our characters... (Kinda.)
4107740 Oh this is gonna be fun!
4107740 Take your time mate. Because this story is awesome. And you are awsome for writing it.
4140599 YOU'VE EXPOSED MY PLOT HOLE!
Twilight? You know what to do...
dat han solo reference