Stupid hooves..
You cant help but slouch. The past few hours of your life have been very... Exciting to say the least. But now you are sitting magically handcuffed to a hospital bed, attached to a myriad of medical equipment. However while you feel like you should be excited, or scared, or generally feel any other emotion, instead you simply feel... Bored.
It's been several hours now, and except for watching the Ponyville hospital ponies take care of you, you've had very little to do. The Hospital staff were friendly but didn't engage you in any sort of real conversation. You guess even Hospitals in Equestria are busy. Also escape seems to be impossible with those two guard ponies at the door, and in the shape you currently are in you doubt you'd get far anyways.
So... You wait.
...
....
After a some fitful attempts to nap you hear a conversation at the door. Someone is talking to the two guard ponies outside your room. You hear one of the guards quietly say, "He is healing, but is not ready for the procedure yet. We will notify you when he is healthy enough."
"Thank you guard, but I need to speak to America. I.... feel like it... He is my responsibility."
You hear the guard unlock the door, and Twilight Sparkle walks in. She trots up to your bedside and weakly gives you a small smile.
"Glad to see that you are finally awake..." Twilight quietly says with her eyes looking softly into yours.
"I'm sorry you were hurt... W- We started healing your injuries, but it will take a little time to fully heal you." Twilight says while facing slightly away from you, her eyes wistfully checking the various monitors you have connected to you.
You say nothing for a few seconds.
"Twilight.... Why are you doing this?" You ask quietly.
"I..I- I thought..." Your voice slowly stutters into silence.
Twilight purposefully turns back to you and gently places her hoof on the bed.
"Listen, America? I didn't mean this to be so hard on you.... But..."
Twilight hesitates as her eyes avoid yours.
"I... I think you will that if you just consider it, you'll find that being a pony isn't that bad." Twilight shoulders slump slightly as her eyes look back into yours.
"I know that you really don't want to see me right now, so maybe you'd talk to Roseluck instead. She is a very caring mare and she will answer any questions you might have."
Twilight slowly turns away and pauses in the door frame.
"Get well soon..." Twilight says weakly without turning around. After hesitating for another moment in the door Twilight slowly walks out.
You sit there simply stunned. Twilight seemed to be full of.... regret? Did she regret hurting you, or maybe kidnapping you?
"I just don't understand what's happening here..." You mutter to yourself.
"Um... Maybe I could help with that?" You hear a voice say in a soft but friendly tone. You look up and see Roseluck, the mare that spoke to Twilight during your attempted escape from Quills and Sofas. You look at your restraints and say,
"Well... I'm not exactly going anywhere at the moment. So... why not?"
Roseluck hesitates for a brief moment, then carefully walks in to sit next to your bed.
You both awkwardly stare at the ground.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
You need to say something, anything. The clock is absurdly loud and this mare seems to want to help. It wouldn't hurt to just make some small talk to distract you from your predicament...
You inhale and start to speak,
"W- What about..."
You pause. You quickly spit out the first question you can think of.
"Can I hold your hoof!?"
"What!?"
Roseluck gasps, her eyes widening and leaning slightly away from you.
"We just met! I don't even- how- why?!"
You quickly blush bright red, and quickly try to reassure her.
"No! It isn't like tha-"
You facepalm yourself, causing your restraints to clank around a bit.
"Ow. Ok, sorry. Let me start over."
You hold your hand out to Roseluck and say in a even and factual tone,
"Hi. I'm called America here. I've never seen anything like your hooves before. Would you shake my hand?"
Roseluck looks nervously at your hand, then into your eyes.
"Well..."
"I promise to not do anything, and even if I did try something, I'm tied to this bed, and those two guards at the door could easily help you."
You look into Roselucks eyes and softly say,
"I promise. I will not hurt you."
Roseluck looks into your eyes for a few seconds, then slowly reaches her hoof forward and gently shakes your hand.
You finish the handshake and smile. Roseluck visibly relaxes. You chuckle a little bit and say,
"Sorry, your hooves just looked... really soft. I'd never seen anything like them before."
Roseluck smiles a little bit and says,
"I've never seen anything like your... claws?" Roseluck asks hesitantly.
"Hands." You correct.
Roseluck smiles, "Hands either. Um..."
Roseluck's voice trails off. You catch her quickly sneak a peak at your hands. You drum your fingers on the bedside, and her eyes dart to watch them.
Roseluck looks bashfully into your eyes and asks, "Could I maybe... Touch them?"
Roseluck instantly blushes. You laugh boisterously and say,
"You can touch mine if I can feel yours!"
Roseluck starts reaching forward to your hand then freezes, instantly her whole face goes bright red. A split second later she busts into a adorable laugh while covering her mouth.
"Hahahaha! Oh! Wheeew! Heh, sounds like a good deal to me!" Roseluck says, now completely relaxed and grinning.
Roseluck then reaches her hooves eagerly forward and gently grabs your palm with both hooves. She gently squeezes your hand and starts feeling each individual finger. The entire time she is holding her breath and she seems to be turning a bit blue...
"Hey Roseluck... you might want to breathe a little?" You jokingly say.
Roseluck exhales and giggles a bit. "I'm sorry, it's just your... Hands... are so interesting! They look so delicate, but seem so complex!"
You grin and say, "Yup! These things are the reason my species got so far! They've served me quite well, which is why I don't really want to give them up so easily."
Roseluck looks into your eyes as her ears fold down and she stops massaging your hand. "So it's true? The rumors? That we have been kidnapping other species and turning them into stallions?"
"Well... at least that's why I'm here. Twilight made it pretty clear that I was becoming a stallion, 'FOR EQUESTRIA!'" You reply while ruefully looking at Roseluck.
"That reminds me. Why exactly IS Equestria having a stallion shortage?" You ask.
"Hmmm.. " Roseluck takes one of her hooves off your hand to thoughtfully tap her hoof against her jaw. "Well, I'm not sure. The newspapers say that it could be several things. It could be some magical spell's side effects are causing only fillies to be born, or that the changing invasion was stealing love for so many years that less couples had children, or any number of things have been suggested." Roseluck then cautiously looks around the room and leans in to whisper into your ear.
"Some ponies say that since Princess Luna was in charge of..."
Roseluck blushes a bit and quietly says, "Encouraging ponies... To... you know... Do that... Well, some ponies are saying that Princess Celestia didn't do as good of a job, and that it somehow effected if fillies or colts were born."
"Really? I thought that Princess Cadence was in charge of-"
Roseluck interrupts you while gently punching you in the shoulder. "Hehe, that's LOVE you silly! Not lust! Luna is in charge of the night, that's why she influences.... 'Nightly activities'."
"Hmm... That might make sense... But why kidnap prospective stallions? Couldn't she just..." You hesitate for a moment while searching for a way to put this.
"Maybe... 'Amp up' the... Feelings?"
Roseluck blushes and says, "Honestly, I think she did. Pretty much every Stallion in Ponyville is taken, and even the gay ones started asking MARES out! That's why all the rumors started."
"So making all of Equestria horny wasn't enough and the next step was to kidnap me?!"
Roseluck looks confused for a second and asks, "What? What do you mean? One third of Equestria is always 'horney'!"
You busy out laughing and say, "No! Haha, no... It's a euphemism... You know? For being... Aroused?"
*Cough* *cough* You look up to see an embarrassed Twilight Sparkle looking at you both from the doorway.
You look down and realize that Roseluck has been holding your hand this entire time. Were her hooves really this soft? They're like-
"EEP!" Roseluck quickly lets your hands go and scoots back a bit.
"Well.... Ehem. Glad to see that you two are getting along so well " Twilight annoyedly says while trotting into the room.
Twilight ignores what she had just heard and instead directly gets to the reason she came back in, "So America, I know you are resistant to change, but this really is a amazing opportunity! You'd get to live in Equestria... Get pretty much any special some pony you wanted... I mean... Wouldn't that be... Great?"
Twilight's ears were slowly drooping lower and lower while she was talking, and by the end you were thinking that Twilight might be more convincing herself of the values of being a pony than you.
"Twilight, a cage no matter how pretty... is just that. A pretty cage. You brought me here against my will, and would have turned me into a pony against my will."
Roselucks ears perk up just a bit and she asks, "Wait, does that mean you think we are pretty?"
You twitch and flush angrily. "No! Well... Yes. But not like that!"
The mares both stare at you.
"Listen.." You say, "You are both beautiful mares, and Roselucks hooves.... I mean. *Erherm*, I am a human being. I am attracted to human GIRLS!"
Both mares gasp.
"What!"
"America! Why would-"
"That's just wrong!"
"-they are just Children!"
You flush even more red and yell in anger, "Agh! No! I'm interested in full grown women! You know... Like a mare!?"
Roseluck's face crinkles in confusion, "Wait, so you love large women, or mares? Which is it?"
You facepalm again. Ow. Right. Hospital restraints hurt.
"Ok..." You say, hands gripping the sides of your bed as you try to remain calm. "I am interested in human females of the adult age. I am a human, it is natural to be interested in humans. Not ponies."
"So wait..." Twilight says pointing her hoof at you, "You even as a human admit that we are... 'Pretty'... but you say that as a human you are attracted to humans. So since you find us pretty as a human, when you are a stallion there shouldn't be a problem!"
*sigh* "Twilight, your logic is undeniable. But I do not want to be a pony!"
"Why not!" Twilight shouts while stomping her hoof on the ground, "America, why are you so racist!"
You try to speak, but Twilight cuts you off.
"Is there anything WRONG with being a pony!? Is it such a bad thing to live in Equestria!?! I SAW your world! I know what you humans do! I'd rather live as a pony in Equestria than as a human in your world!" "ERRUGH!"
"Twilight wai-"
SLAM.
Twilight had just stormed out of your room. Both you and Roseluck sit quietly for a few moments.
"We'll, that escalated quickly."
"It did."
You both sit for a few minutes in silence, then Roseluck grins at you.
"So... You like my hooves huh??"
"Wh- what!? Um... Yeah. They're really soft..." You stutter out, feeling incredibly embarrassed.
"Oh so you are that kinda colt huh..." Roseluck says saucily, "Well if you want these hooves you'll have to-"
"Visiting hours are over. You may leave citizen." One of the guards interrupts from the door.
"Well... Maybe next time America..." Roseluck says swishing her tail while walking away.
"Bye Roseluck..." You quietly say. You wonder if every pony will be this... way around you.
"Luna, this is all your fault!" You angrily mutter to your self.
You slowly try to go to sleep, and make yourself as comfortable as possible in your restraints before eventually drifting off.
"Stupid sexy hooves..."
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America Y U NO LIEK RULE 34 PONY!
good story.
Ahhh this is just so much fun to read.
Great job and this chapter went slower then the others but that's good since he's in a hospital and all that.
1866876
Clopper
I'd never be able to keep a straight face, much less talk coherently, if my conversational partner keeps on calling me 'America' with utmost sincerity.
Ah, so, sticking with the name 'America' eh? These chapters get getting more interesting and interesting!
Oh my Celestia this is hilarious.
1866998
Nope just surprised.
*walks away whistling*
looks like someone has feet fetish
or is it hoof fetish?
1867220
Suuuuuure
1867062
Now i had to imagine him lying bound in a hospital bed trying very very hard not to laugh while Twilight is talking over serious things with him and adressing him as America
Stupid sexy Flanders.
1867353
"It feels like I'm wearing nothing at all!
Nothing at all!
Nothing at all!"
Right now I am imagining Obama saying. "So, America. Do you want to be a pony?"
We'll is wrong by the way. Also, lack of sex does not affect stallion to mare ratio. It just makes the population smaller.
Also Twi, would you like to be a human and lose your magic? No? Why are you so racist Twi?
FOR EQUESTRIA!
1859578
I know. That' s one of the reasons I want to live in dat Equestria.
Why does the main character being called America remind me of Hetalia?
"America, why are you so racist?"
Technically, America is species-ist instead of racist, but... minor details
*is now marked under a grave* *the sign by the grave reads* "Died via laughing to stupid sexxy hooves."
So far this is one of the more amusing stories I've found.
Is any explanation going to be given for the Stallion decline? You don't need to explain it now, just curious if that little plot device will ever be explained.
Jegus, all these muscle beasts are all up on his bone bulge
Stupid sexy Roseluck... Why must I apparently have a foot (hoof?) fetish?!
1869221 Yes. It will be, I'm just saving that for a later chapter.
1867606 I put that theory in as something the newspaper said... :) I never said it had to be logical!
This story has me laughing at every turn. I love it.
1875581 Okay, cool.
Can't wait to see what you have in store.
Now I need to work on my own fic....
1866998 ill have you know that micthemicrophonezero is a cloper
I've always wanted to see a story with such a scenario. Let's see how you managed this.
1822576 Well, I know that some people would say "Worth it." Not sure how to think about that...
1889427
Yea. I figured
You should make these chapters longer And use :you're: not you are.
THIS IS GOING TO BE AWSOME!!!!!!!!
You know this whole thing could have been solved if he told Roseluck that she was seeking some bronies from his fandom to become ponies and told the truth that he thought the Twilight that sent him that message was a fake Twilight and lied about becoming a pony. He also should've tried to convince her to just send him back and get OTHER BRONIES, he could be just the first person to say no Twilight directly at her face.
America! Why are you so RACIST!?!
feels like they are wearing nothing at all.
nothing at all!
NOTHING AT ALL!
GAH!!! stupid sexy hooves.
Why do I feel like the first scene was orignially going to be like this?
Well.. the first 30-40 seconds at least.
Pffft! America, why are you so racist?
So im guessing hes ganna keep the name america
3051081 AMERICA FUCK YEAH!
Why does that last thing "America" says remind me of this:[youtube=i6vPQL_aYfI]?
-Twilight, I'm not racist, I'm specist, there's a difference.
5502720 No, America definitely is racist.
I have spent the last five minutes trying to come up with a nice, ambiguously insulting pun involving "America" and "horsefucking," but I just can't really think of anything better than "hyeh hyeh hyeh, cowboys" right now. I'll get back to you on that later.
Jeez. The protaganist is making the most articulate argument on why he does not want to be a pony, free will being the strongest point, and he is either being ignored or accused. Jeez. Well, if reasoning them is not going to work, then he is going to have to either fight or flee.
Hmmm, twilight and the brony make very good points (and earth pony mares like rose luck must have a nice softness all over), but I must ask.
Where is my email for ponification!
6000269
For some reason I lost my shit at 'hyeh hyeh hyeh, cowboys.'
Twilight... I can't believe you'll have to be exterminated for using the R-word
...
I wouldn't claim my race superior! We're all equal in this respect. And you, ponies, are not even a different human race to begin with!