Running from Twilight by Brony-Sibling
"STOP!" Twilight Sparkle screamed. "Or when I catch you I'll turn you into a MARE!"
You instinctively duck, and the purple-white "transmogrification" beam shoots over your head, missing you by mere centimeters.
"Urrgh!!" Twilight screams in frustration. "Just. Hold. STILL!" Each word is punctuated with another magic blast that barely misses, resulting in some very sexually confused birds, and one very embarrassed Applejack.
You take advantage of Twilight’s momentary distraction with a now VERY masculine Applejack to dodge around a corner and take off down a valley.
How did you end up like this you ask? Well, as very powerful magic user once said, “Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger.” If only you would have listened...
So it all It started with your usual morning routine. You blearily wake up, look at your clock, grunt, check email, Facebook, fimfiction. Then head downstairs to take a shower and get breakfast.
You were halfway through your bowl of cereal when your computer beeped at you. It was a email from someone on Fimfiction with the subject line, "Want to be ponyfied?"
The email itself only said this:
"So?
-TS"
You smile, and briefly entertain the idea of this really being from THE "TS". As in THE Twilight Sparkle [also the best pony].
“Naw.”
You begin typing a playful email asking about the results, deciding to role play a bit and get some fun out of this. [Will it be painful, can I choose to be a Pegasus, will I have a cutie mark? Etc....]
Halfway into a paragraph, you simply delete it, then respond with one word.
"Sure."
SEND.
You close your laptop, finish your breakfast, and head to your room and get dressed. Right as you finished putting on your favorite Rainbow Dash hoodie you start feeling weird.
"Ugh. Milk was a bad choice..."
All of a sudden you feel it. Something is off. The hair on the back of your neck is standing up, and your body is suddenly filled with adrenaline. There is something dangerous and REALLY close.
You reach for a something to use as a weapon, but instead you suddenly throw yourself to the side. Your bed suddenly seems to implode upon itself and dissapear with a "VOIP".
There was only one explanation.
You are Spider-Man.
Or... You have Spider-Sense or something...
Regardless, something else is coming and your bed has ceased its existence. Also, your new "Spider-Sense" is tingling...
You have to get out of the house.
You are sprinting towards the door when everything starts shimmering, it almost looks like the entire house is made of melting jello! Just as you put your hand on the door handle, its too late.
The world goes black as you feel your very soul dissolve.
You wake up laying on the floor, a tingling feeling slowly fading from your bones as you wake up.
You slowly sit up wondering "What just happened?" As you are slowly getting to your feet you lose your balance and fall on your face.
"Owwww."
Then you realize it's not just you that is falling to the floor. It's EVERYTHING in your house! It almost looks like you are going through a massive earthquake... But everything is falling toward the center of the house instead of just falling arbitrarily in place.
Right as you could almost start swimming among the appliances, DVDs, and other household items, the bottom of the house literally rips open. The rip spreads until your house has completely been torn in half. When you are staring in unbelief through the new "window" you realize that your house is FLOATING in MIDAIR!
As you are falling through the hole you feel something grab hold of you, and you are dragged out from your floating new half houses. The half houses fall to the ground behind you with a massive *CRUNCH*
You are still being held in the air by something, but you can't see what is holding you. There is only a slight shimmer of purple around you that you can barely make out.
Suddenly you are drawn face to face with the most powerful being you've ever seen.
Twilight Sparkle.
It's. Twilight. Sparkle.
She smiles this positively adorable smile as a bead of sweat trails down her brow.
"Whew! I had a lot of trouble locking onto you! So I just gated your entire house here instead. I hope you don't mind... Hehe.."
Your mind is frozen. You couldn't say anything. You couldn't even reach forward to hug her like your Brony instincts were screaming at you to do. Instead you just stared at her.
"Well." Twilight said without missing a beat. "Lets get you ready!"
You are floated over to what looks like a primitive set of iron handcuffs attached to a block of old wood. Your hands are then locked into place by Twilight’s magic.
While it IS Twilight Sparkle, and you trust her (and that smile is SO cute!) you are a bit concerned... You’ve been teleported, had your house torn in two, and now are shackled to a block of wood.
That's when you suddenly find your voice again.
"It's- You're-You are real!?
Twilight smiles and nods as she checks a list with the word “Transmogrification” on the top
"So, wait, I was brought here so that I could actually become a pony if I wanted?" You ask.
"Not only can you," Twilight says excitedly."You are!"
"Just wait a second Twilight.." You say as you try to gesture with your bound hands. "I don't know anything about being a pony! I thought that email was a joke!"
"Well," Twilight says, "Even so.... Just think how fun it will be as a pony!"
"Wait a second..." You are starting to feel very nervous about this. "What's the catch?"
"Catch?" Twilight says while avoiding eye contact. "There's no catch! I mean... You are going to be a stallion in Ponyville! How many other Bronies would love to have the same opportunity?"
You suspiciously stare at Twilight "Why is it important that I'm a stallion..."
"Well... Um...." Twilight is now facing away from you and bashfully scraping a hoof against the ground.
Twilight whirls around to face you and blurts out, "Ponyville has a gender ratio disparity!" She lets out a nervous sigh and continues. "Mares outnumber stallions by over 3 to 1. This of course results in lack of couples, lack of foals, and unhappy mares! Other cities in Equestria are suffering the same problem!"
"So.." You ask, "What's the problem? Is it really that bad?"
"Bad?" "BAD?" Twilight's pupils dililate as she gets right in your face. "This causes the lack of a stable gene pool! Increasing birth defects and hereditary diseases! And lots of single, unhappy mares?! Yes that's BAD!”
"Sorry..." You mutter.
Twilight looks away in a huff and says, "And you Bronies always asume things... We are NOT LESBIANS!" Twilight begins muttering into her hooves. "Just because Rainbow is a tomboy, and I like reading books DOSENT mean that we are... UGH!"
Twilight spins back to glare at you with bloodshot eyes.
“So we need... no… EQUESTRIA needs Stallions to survive! It was a logical conclusion to increase our supply!"
At this point her eye starts twitching.
"So. Time to be ponyfied!" Twilight's yells as her horn begins to charge up.
"Twilight wait!" You yell as you struggle to escape your bonds, "I didn't agree to this!"
"Oh yes you did!" Twilight exclaims, levitating a printed copy of your emails transcript. "This is a legally binding agreement!"
"But it wasn't informed consent!" .You yell as you frantically pull at your bonds.
"Sorry" Twilight says, "I have to do this! For Equestria!"
Twilight points her horn, fully charged at your chest, and right as she is about to fire.... pauses.
"Oh. Right. What type of Pony would you like to be?"
With a burst of strength you tear the metal stockade from the wooden fastenings and bellow:
"AMERICA!!!!!"
"America? Is that Brony slang of some type? That wasn't one of the-" Twilight was cut off as you lunge forward and smack into her, bowling her over. The confusion and disorientation caused the spell to fire while narrowly missing you. Using the seconds of disorientation you take off sprinting.
Twilight stood up a bit shaky from the misfired spell and flying tackle feeling VERY frustrated. As she begins to frantically sprint after you she screams.
"STOP! Or when I catch you I'll turn you into a MARE!"
This was going to be a very interesting day...