Running from Twilight

by Brony-Sibling


Barehoof in the kitchen?

“Breathe.... Inhale... exhale... Ok. You can do this America... You just have to believe....”

“Breathe. Breathe...”

“Ok.” *Whew* “You can do this... you can figure this out.”

“Breathe. Whewww....”

You sit, hands cradling your head in Twilight’s bedroom as you reflect on what just happened. You just were literally handed by Flawed Justice... a court imposed sentence of abuse and terror at the hands, neigh... hooves of Twilight Sparkle, and now you are sitting in her bedroom.

This is going to be a long month.

But, you are an AMERICAN. You are just going to have to make the best of it, nope, even conquer these circumstances! The first step is-

“-America! Hello?!” Twilight interrupts by waving a friendly hoof in your face. “It’s time to cook dinner!” Twilight says, squeeing just a tiny bit.

“Wha? Dinner?” You mutter in confusion.

“Yes you silly!” Twilight says, excitedly patting you on the shoulder. “This is going to be so much fun! I can’t wait to spend all of my time with you!”

*Gulp* “Umm... whaat?”

“Here! Grab a hold! I’ll teleport us right there!” Twilight says while happily hopping from hoof to hoof.

“But it’s just downst-” You start to say, then give up mid sentence. You hesitating for a brief second or two... then you slowly reach out and grab onto Twilight Sparkle’s horn.

Suddenly you feel a cold breeze drift over your shoulders.... Twilight isn’t moving a muscle, it feels like the room just dropped 10 degrees, and then Twilight’s face slowly begins changing into a...

Big.

Bright.

Cherry red.

“Um... America? *inhale* You might... um.. *inhale*... want to let go.” Twilight says breathily.

You quickly look down at your hand, back up to Twilight’s horn, then back at Twilight’s ever expanding blush.

“oh. OH!” You snap your hand back as if burned. “I’m so sorry!”

Twilight kicks at the ground bashfully, then looking back up into your eyes says, “It’s... it’s ok. Just... I’m... let’s move slowly... ok?.” She says, cutely smiling while avoiding eye contact.

HHNNNNNNNNNNNGGGG. Keep it together man. KEEP IT TOGETHER.

You hesitate, then slowly hover your hand over her back. Glancing at Twilight, she smiles and nods. As soon as you put down your hand on her back you hear it again. [Red Alert!]

*VATHOUMP*

You open your eyes to.. yep. You’re in the kitchen. Your feet feel cold and... yep. Somehow Twilight teleported you, but left your shoes and socks in her bedroom.

Barefoot in the kitchen... great.

You let go of Twilight’s back, and as you are turning to look at the kitchen you notice two glowing eyes staring at you from the Library’s dark basement...

It’s Spike. You swear you can hear this music playing somewhere...

Slowly... and menacingly... Spike closes the door to the basement, withdrawing each individual claw slowly from the door. Soon as that’s left is a crack with a single glowing eye.

You think... no. There’s no way. Did he say...

Tonight... You..."

You feel a shiver run up your spine.

“America? Are you ok? You look like you’ve seen Luna’s ghost!” Twilight says, worriedly placing a hoof on your arm.

“...”

Twilight sighs in relief. “Phew! I’m glad. Teleportation can be somewhat disorienting at first.” Twilight brushes her hoof over your arm in concern, then suddenly remembers why she’d teleported you.

“Oh right! So, the kitchen’s right here! Oh- I hope you don’t mind me removing your socks and shoes, you won’t be needing them in there.” She innocently beams, and almost hops into the kitchen.

“Oh! Right. SPIKE!!” Twilight yells, pausing in front of the shelves. “SPIKE! Ohh... Where is that dragon?... Oh well. I’ll just tell you.” Twilight says, gesturing happily at the various shelves and drawers. “The salad is in the refrigerator, and the silverware is in the second cabinet, third drawer down.”

“Ok. So... what would you like for dinner?”

Twilight’s smile (if that was possible) grows even bigger. She happily punches you in the arm, “Oh! *Eeee* Whatever you want to cook America! I’ll be happy with anything as long as you make it!”

BE STILL MY HEART. *HNGGG.*

You hold your punched arm and bashfully scratch your head. “Um... hmm... Hows... spaghetti?” You meekly ask.

“That’d be just PER-fect!” Twilight happily squeals, and she immediately levitates all of the ingredients out to the countertop.

Twilight after arranging each bowl by size, ingredient by type, and untinsil by a combined sorting method of size and color coordination, looks you in the eye and announces. “Ready to cook America?! I’m ready!” She says, stomping a hoof and smiling proudly. “Let no mare say that Twilight Sparkle doesn’t help out in the kitchen!”

You stand there for a second, observing the perfect order hovering over head, and you realize that Twilight’s a lot more powerful than you realized... and fortunately she... seems... to really mean well.

I mean... Why else would she help with the cooking? You weren’t being used like a 1950’s version of slave labor like you’d originally thought...

Twilight’s smile fades slightly and a spoon she is levitating droops a bit. “America... are you ok?”

You put on a smile. Even if it’s acting, this is a great chance to find out... or.. look for an esca-... SCREW it. You are cooking with Twilight Sparkle!
“Oh! No! I’m fine.” You take the spoon from Twilight and turn to the stove-top. “Just thinking of how to cook this. Do you have any garlic?”

Twilight smiles happily. “Right here!”

You spend the next 30 minutes cooking up some delicious garlic bread, Italian spaghetti, and a quick and simple side salad with carrots. The entire time Twilight takes notes while simultaneously handing you mixing bowls, ingredients, and happily chatting with you about Human cuisine the entire time.

You both sit down to dinner, and Twilight calls out for Spike, “SPIIIKE! Dinnertime!”

You hear a angry grumble, and Spike yells up. “I’m... I’m... I’m on a DIET! Thanks though!”

Twilight scrunches her face up in confusion. “That’s weird. He’s always hungry...” Twilight shrugs. “It’s probably for Rarity somehow...”

You both start to eat and as Twilight takes the first bite, she exclaims, “America! You really can cook! This is amazing!” You both dig in, and finish the meal in record time.

You start to gather up the plates to wash them, but Twilight quickly teleports them all instead. “Don’t we have to-”

“Nope!” Twilight interrupts. “It’s a spell I invented! It cleans, and stores the dishes for me! I just had to preset the tags and labels each dish’s individual teleportation spell to each storage rack, and set the heat cleansing spell’s parameters to the dishes dimensions!”

You don’t even know what to think.

“Dat spell.” You mutter in awe.

Twilight blushes, then her eyes flick down towards your hoodie. She frowns and you *think* you see a almost invisible flash of magic from her horn.. Twilight then trots over to you and grabs your Rainbow Dash hoodie and inspects it.

“Oh MY!” Twilight says a little too loudly. “It looks like your CLOTHES are DIRTY.” Twilight says grinning ever so slightly too big. “We can’t have that! Let’s wash them!”

You grin nervously. “Ok.. well can’t we do that late-”

“Noletsdoitnow!” *YANK* *”WAAGH!” Twilight grabs you by your hoodie and clumsily starts trying to pull it off. “Twilig-” *yank* “Stoppi-” *yank* “WHAT AR-” *YANK*

Twilight growls in Frustration, then levitates you into the air. *YANK YANK YANK YANK* “TWILIGHT STOP TRYING TO YANK ME OFF!”

Twilight accidentally drops you in shock, then busts out laughing. “HAHAHA..! Oh! Oh!! Oh. haha. Ohh...” Twilight says laying on the ground while trying to stop laughing. “Ok..” *snicker* “America. I won’t try to...” *snicker* “yank you off anymore! I promise!”

You try to glare at her at first, then burst out laughing yourself.

“Hahah! Ha. Oh...” *wheeew...* “Alright Twilight. Here.” You take off your hoodie, and hand it to Twilight. “You win. My garment... Mi-lady...” You bow to the ground, theatrically gesturing.

*Twilight giggles* “Why thank you... kind... sir.” Twilight teleports your hoodie away, and looks right back at you with a stange look...

Twilight slowly saunters straight up to you, and jumps right at your chest. You reflexively catch her, and suddenly you are cradling Twilight Sparkle to your chest.

She smiles at you while brushes a hoof through your hair says, “So America... carry me upstairs?”

“Uh........” *Come-on America! BRAIN SOMETHING!!!!*

“Ok...” (Real smooth 007...)

You carry Twilight upstairs, and she snuggles into your chest ever so slightly. *gasp*

BRAIN.EXE has suffered a serious system error.

You reach the door, and realize you can’t open the door without putting Twilight down.

[RED ALERT]

*VATHOMP*

You’ve suddenly been teleported into a chair on the balcony, and you look down to see instead of Twilight, a book in your hands. She smiles in a teasing manner.

“What did you think I meant? Hmmm????”

(EPIC FACEPALM)