Meet Ditch.

Ditch is the caretaker at the Canterlot Cemetery. He lives a calm life involving digging, burying, seldom... well, occasional... alright, habitual drinking, and generally managing the place and its residents to the best of his abilities.

Ditch enjoys his job. The salary is not enough to live, but sufficient not to die, the graveyard shifts are not graveyard shifts, and the clients are calm and docile, even if a little bit stiff. Canterlot ponies, right? But Ditch does not mind. They don’t complain and loyally catch some due rest.

Except for when they suddenly don’t.

Celestia has had to deal with many things throughout her reign, laws, deplomatic meetings, acient old threats coming back to modern day (well more like her pupil dealing with them but who's really going into specifics?) and snobs. Celestia has seen it all and hasn't backed down from any of them. But it gets really boring sometimes.

Thankfully we have a green fellow coming to steal the princess! Let's see how that goes, will it work? will the princess get her day off early? Will they eat cake and enjoy a moment of tranquility? Find all that out in this one-shot!

If your asking why make this the answer is simple; To get better at writing sentimental moments with characters, and trying to make them act in character, so if you have any constructive criticism please do share!

Artist
Also...
POGGGG FEATURED ON 9/25/2021 FIRST FEATURE AGHHHHHHHH THANK YOU GUYS SO MUUUUUUUCHHHHHHHHH

"And we are absolutely certain that's a settlement? That Rhysling already has Indigenous populations?"

"Yes, Commander. There is no doubt. An engineer can fix the probe, but he would not know how to talk to them."

"Alright. Forget the engineer, then. Get me the linguist."

Coverart by SagebrushPony (not on Fimfiction).

Preread by Sunnypack, Shinzakura, Ghuntz, and Admiral Biscuit.

French language support by Conflicting views and Sparktail. German language support by Purple Smart. Russian language support by Alkarasu.

This story follows show canon until the end of Season 1.

Featured on 30 June -- 4 July 2021.

Given a unique perspective on negative emotion, less than a foal's knowledge of ordinary magic, a healthy schadenfreude, and danger bearing down on all sides, the self-proclaimed "Weiss Noir" makes no plans accounting for his death, and plans to keep it that way, even after being torn away from earth, turned into a unicorn, and dumped into one of the most inhospitable locations and times in all of Equestria.

Stranded in the Frozen North, a place where biting cold ends lives, and one thousand years in the past, in a time when peril is the norm, rather than the exception, Weiss decides to indulge in sorcery most foul, stolen ideas, and human ingenuity to survive.

Given the choice between a mad slaver and a mad sage, however, there is no avoiding an inevitable tide of ponies escaping the conquered Crystal Empire to bask in the warmth of his well-stoked hate. Something which draws attention, enemies, and most worryingly, the rivalry of his "peers".

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What if one day you woke up suddenly drowning? The only saving grace you had was a multitude of pink limbs pulling you out and the next thing you knew you’re surrounded by dozens of Pinkie clones... and that you were one of them.

CONTENT WARNINGS: Xenomorphs, facehuggers, mentions of invasive face-hugging, identity crisis, general emotional distress

The following story contains no named character deaths, and no scenes of chestbursting. This story is intended to be a more light-hearted AU. Proceed with caution.

Xenomorph.

A creature designed by nature for one thing: Hunting.

A creature meant to adapt to its host, infiltrate under cover of darkness, replicate and breed and swarm, until a planet is no more. The perfect organism.

Yet... what would happen if one were to experience independent thought, empathy, and self doubt?

What if indeed.

Anon just wanted to play a prank with his newfound powers. It got out of hand.
(RGRE)
{This story has two versions, the last chapter is the first person version.}

Sweetie Belle knows there's something wrong with Ponyville. There should probably be plants growing, and less dirt in the air. Maybe the sun should set every now and then.

For her, no incongruity is quite as important as her simple mission. She must reach the center of the maze before her body runs down. It's a good thing she has such good friends along to help her.

The end of magic in Equestria doesn't have to be the end of ponies, not if Sweetie doesn't let it.

This story was written for the Iron Writer competition at Everfree Northwest, where it won an honorable mention. This contest required an idea conform to certain prompts, and be written entirely in the span of two hours.

Cover by Zutcha

Whenever Time Turner touches a pony, he knows how and when they are going to die.

This makes living a regular life rather difficult.

Michael works as a researcher in the local branch of the ‘Anomaly Containment And Study Centre’.

After a long day at work, he notices an unusual anomaly devouring all the blueberries in his garden.

MLP:FIM does NOT exist in this world.

Second story by the way. I always appreciate constructive feedback and other ideas :)

Story picture by: Nathayro37 (Deviantart)
Check him out. He makes some AMAZING art.