• Published 21st May 2019
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The Unique Properties of Dark Magic - Shadestyle



Stranded in Equestria's far past in the body of a unicorn without any magical knowledge, the self proclaimed "Weiss Noir" fights for survival in the Frozen North by indulging in sorcery most foul.

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(Present Chapter 56) Seventh Warrior, Fifth Weapon


Two buildings ground against one another. One, the centermost sanctum of a holy temple, the other, a fragment of a vast and mysterious castle. It was in the center, where these two met, that two very old ponies met once again.

One was a pale white, with vivid red scales, a heavy stocky build, and a mane of blazing fire, that jutting out in all directions like jets of fire, his spiked beard rippling and flickering like cutting torches.

The other was a shimmering color, somewhere between lavender and brown, pudgy and short, with a braided mane of grey-purple flames, thick and trailing down to her knees.

The two were sitting on simple cushions, at the edges of their respective realms, looking at one another with what was clearly love between them.

"Hello, Snacky. It's been a while, hasn't it? Have you been alright on your own?" Whippersnap asked, leaning forwards with a warm expression.

Snickersnack gruffly huffed. "That's not what we're here to talk about, dear. Have you found a suitable user?"

She rubbed her chin. "There is one. My current wielder is fine, but she doesn't really need me, now does she?" Whippersnap responded.

"We need to hurry and get the last two weapons to their wielders. I can feel a change in the wind. We're nearing the time when we'll be needed again. When the Warriors of Light will be needed again," the stallion said, his mane flickering a few times.

"Don't worry. That other star isn't much, but it'll find its way. Trust the tree, Snacky."

Snickersnack rolled his eyes, but his lips were twitching upwards. "Fine. I'll 'trust the tree'... Snappy."

She nodded primly. "We'll find our way. We just have to trust that fate will be kind. Won't it?"

"It will. We'll be facing it together, after all," Snickersnack said, as their two domains began to part once more, temple and castle slipping away.


Gilda finished shaking Applejack's hoof.

"Thanks fer the show. I know it probably wasn't too convenient for ya... I ain't an invalid, dang it, I coulda went to whatever fancy place you were planning on doing this thing at," Applejack commented. She and her friends did seem interested in going to one of Gilda and Trixie's shows, but after the incident at Canterlot, the mare had been too injured to travel.

Naturally, since the farmer couldn't come to the show they decided to bring the show to the farm, to make up for it.

While Trixie was busy talking to the crowd and signing autographs after the wowing display of stunt flying, fireworks, and magic tricks galore, Gilda had gone over to the real audience, namely, the friends and acquaintances she had begun to make in Ponyville.

"Hey, don't worry about it. We still got a great turnout," Gilda shrugged. "Besides, it isn't like we're doing this for money. Still filthy stinking rich, remember?"

"Applejack is mighty grateful, either way, dear. Some R and R is just what she needs to get back on her hooves" Granny Smith said, patting her grandfilly on the shoulder.

"Aw granny, I'm not that hurt," Applejack brushed the hoof away. While she did need to wear a brace, the brace was shrinking with every trip to the doctor, as less and less support was needed for her recovering back. It didn't stop her friends and family from fretting over her, but it was a clear sign of progress.

"Bah. Don't listen to her. Yer little show brought plenty of pep around here, an the sales don't hurt none either," Granny interjected. Twilight and the others giggled a bit as the green mare glanced over at where Flim and Flam were using their smooth talking to move produce over at the stall nearby.

Gilda snorted as her own friends started approaching, Trixie in tow. "Alright. See you round, hayseed."

"That was seriously cool, how did you even do that thing with the hoops?!" Shooting Star asked excitedly, Trixie preening at the attention.

"Well, it took a very long time for Trixie to work out the exact details, but that's all she will say on the matter. A magician never reveals her secrets, after all!" she said, using her considerable mental fortitude to not explain how she hid gunpowder in the hoops to make them spin up into the air like she did.

Following her this time was a few other individuals as well, some flaming ponies Gilda didn't recognize, and a dragon she definitely didn't recognize.

Flim and Flam, done with selling apples and apple accessories, took the liberty of introducing the newcomer.

"Hello, dears and dearettes, this is our wonderful new friend, Garble. He's that dragon that got ran over, if you recall my earlier story?" Flam said, tipping his hat with a smile.

"Hey, don't get the wrong idea, I'm not your friend," Garble huffed, putting the last word in air quotes. "It's just that that zebra lady has been making me come here to get her stuff."

Sunset raised an eyebrow. "Uh huh, and..?" the mare asked, unsure why the dragon would care to meet with them if he was going to be this grouchy about it.

Garble kicked the ground. "Her creepy mom said I had to 'meet the other warriors', and told me to just go along with it, or she'd turn me pink," he grumbled.

The dragon held his hands out, and in a flash of light, a big metal pot appeared. Sunset seemed to recognize it vaguely, but it was Gilda and Shooting Star that immediately realized what it was. Flim and Flam didn't seem to react, having seen it already, and Trixie just looked confused.

"Trixie is confused," she helpfully explained.

"You've got one of those things like we've got!" Shooting Star said, flashing with light as she turned into a robotic, mechanical looking mare, holding a big wand with a glowing yellow star atop it.

Gilda, at the same time, summoned the Master Sword from wherever it was when she wasn't using it, the weapon appearing in her grip.

None of them were sure what to say, but there was some subtle feeling that went between all the weapon-wielders, that seemed to finally be perceptible with four of them in one place.

Garble shuffled. "Okay, cool, so we've all got weird magic things. Is that all I needed to come here for?"

Sunset pushed her way past her friends. "Wait, everyone, we're three, maybe four for four on the Weapons of Light migrating owners. This might be one of those magical destiny things I've read about..." Immediately, the magical-science-obsessed mare had a thought dragging all of her attention onto it.

"What, like a cutie mark?" Gilda frowned.

"No, not exactly. Magic has a funny way of doing things, though. Garble, when you got that pot, did you feel anything particularly noteworthy?"

He shrugged, slightly weirded out by the pony's intense look that was kinda intimidating (for a pony) "I dunno. It's just a really cool pot. That Zecora lady said I could keep using it if I didn't take it anywhere without her permission."

Sunset scratched her chin.

"Courage, Wishing, Innovation, and whatever "A cool pot" keys to... If four out of the six have already bonded to new owners, then is it a pattern? And if so, who's next?"

"Uh, Sunset, I think you might be overthinking this," Gilda said, dismissing the Weapon of Light in another sparkly flash.

When it didn't look like she was going to drop it, Trixie scoffed. "Sunset, you're being ridiculous. Not everything is some sort of conspiratorial machination of destiny. I feel we may be missing something very important here talking about that Sage's magic junk."

She turns to the dragon. "Garble, did you say something about Zecora's 'Creepy Mom'?"

Immediately, everyone who knew what the showmare was talking about realized at the same time, the implication in the air.

Garble scratched his head. "Yeah? She kept making these weird jokes. I was going to Zecora's place to see what happens if you mix steaks with obsidian, and then..."


"Mother please leave! You've brought me shame! ~ Your actions here, they've soiled my name!
"I only wished to live in peace ~ And now you tell me that has ceased?
"I say thee neigh, no way! Now go! ~ You speak of good, you've brought me woe!
"I care not for your prophesy ~ You've spent too long beneath that tree!" Zecora shouted, belting line after line at the unassuming zebra before her.

"Uhh, should I come back later, or..?" Garble said, knocking on the door awkwardly.

The two zebras looked right at him.

"Well, look what the cat's dragon in. No, young drake, my daughter may be spitting fire, but now's as good a time as any," the lady said. "I am Malusi, and you are?"

Zecora's face was a rictus of anger, not at Garble, but at Malusi, who seemed to be acting as if this was her house, rather than Zecora's.

"Uhh, the name's Garble. Look, I'm gonna go, this really seems like a bad time," the drake said, turning around before yelping in fright.

The weird Zebra somehow got right behind him in a second.

"Bad time? Hardly, we should really tock now. You wouldn't want to tick me off would you?" She said, glancing back at her fuming daughter. "Hour little spat can wait."

She began to walk around the teenage dragon, who felt a weird, uncomfortable vibe in the air from this freaky zebra.

"I've got to hand it to you, I really do mean-ute. I wasn't expecting someone like you to have the wonder needed to bond with the Krak Pot, but on the second hand, I suppose it was getting around that time."

"Leave him be. ~ You'll anger me, ~ Something you don't want to see," Zecora warned, having drawn a bottle of something from her shelf, brandishing it threateningly.

Malusi rolled her eyes, but a dangerously clever glint somehow entered into her gaze, even as she dropped the puns...

"The short version, then. I need to return to the tree to meditate anyway."

Garble stiffened as those clever eyes turned on him. When she jabbed a hoof against his chest, he backed away. This zebra suddenly felt an awful lot like some dragons he had met before. 'Old,' Garble thought quietly.

And when a dragon thought 'Old', they really meant 'Dangerous'.

"You are the true owner of that pot you stole, little dragon... Go to those pony brothers you met. Have them introduce you to the new Warriors of Light. The day is coming when you'll all be needed. I've forseen that much."

Garble finally mustered up some anger. How dare this little zebra try to boss around a dragon! Before he could try to regain some of his rapidly disgraced pride, however, Malusi pulled out a bottle of her own.

"Do it, or hue'll find out just how pink those scales of yours can get."

Zecora finally had enough, and splashed green liquid at the zebra, who flipped into the air, laughing as she drank a potion that made her disappear entirely. The liquid hissed and bubbled as it made a thick gummy mass on the floor.

Garble shivered. "Uhh, what was that about?"

Zecora frowned. "I'm sorry you had to put up with her ~ She is my mother, a twisted cur."

Stepping aside, Zecora allowed the tall dragon to enter her home. "Please, come in, we've much to do. ~ The pot's set out, if you'd like to brew."

With a shrug, Garble walked in, and Zecora tried her best to explain things to the dragon that just weren't taking, when it came to his knowledge of alchemy, and the pot itself. He certainly still had fun though, watching the sparkly lights and alchemically producing magma steaks, though.

The best he managed to take away from the conversation to follow was that apparently he could teleport the pot to him, and to never, ever do so in front of the Dragon Mouse.


Garble, over the course of the conversation with the B-Team, had eventually meandered over to a stack of hay bales, sitting down while he talked about the weird encounter.

"So, yeah. I hope one of you can explain what the heck was up with that, because I'm pretty much lost on who that lady is," Garble finished.

"She's one of Weiss Noir's goons, as far as Trixie knows," the showmare responded simply.

Shooting Star had a bitter expression on her face. "She's dangerous. She once poisoned nearly every pony in Ponyville, just to make them all hate her."

Sunset, however, had a calculating gleam. "So I was right, there is some destiny at play here, she said as much! We need to know more, if we're going to come out ahead of this thing. If there's one thing I know about fate, it's that not knowing is as good as losing to it. Garble, are you willing to help us with this? It'll almost certainly affect you too," she said with a stomp.

He didn't know what to say. This whole situation was even weirder than the Shadow-Realm dragon clones, and those were weird. "I guess?" he answered.

Trixie once again scoffed. "Sunset, you shouldn't act so crazed. This sounds like an awful lot of superstition to me."

"Yeah? What do you think it's going to sound an awful lot like when Weiss Noir finds out that a bunch of ponies who hate his guts are apparently destined to wield literal weapons of evil-eradication? It's already bad enough that he's going to find out it happened at all, I imagine... I'd rather know exactly what this prophesy is before it comes to bite us. And believe you me, Trixie, destiny always comes back to bite you," Sunset grimaced.

The mare just scoffed. "Those relics might be choosy, but I find it very hard to believe that they're, what, actively seeking out ponies to use them? Drawing them all together? It seems awfully contrived to me."

"Uhh, yeah. That's destiny for you," Sunset responded as if it were obvious.

"Well, I'll believe it when I see it." The showmare said.

With that, the group parted ways. Flim and Flam went to a small shack on the Apple Family property, Shooting Star, Gilda, and Trixie to their flat, and Sunset to the same dark tower she had been living out of since she came to this timeline.

Garble just sort of wandered off into the woods, aiming to return Zecora's pot, not quite knowing how to teleport it back now that he had gotten it to teleport into his claws in the first place... Somehow.


Trixie blinked awake, she had had the most wonderful dream that night. Fireworks, dazzling and more radiant than any she had made before! She dreamed of designs for her show that flitted across her vision, ones that were far too grand to realize in reality, but pleasant nonetheless.

She remembered seeing a filly in the crowd, the only one in the audience, who delighted and marveled at it all. One with the oddest, vaguest sense about them.

Trixie rolled over, and, seeing a huge, star-tipped rod in the bed next to her that practically deluged with magic, she let out an unholy shriek of shock.

Two little dot eyes blinked open on the oversized star-topper. "Oh, good, you're awake!"

Trixie screamed even louder, stumbling out of her bed.

"Who are you?! What are you doing in my room!" the magician said frantically.

The star bobbed up into the air. "I'm the Star Rod of Dreams! You've got big dreams, so I chose you!"

'Oh no...' Trixie realized with dread. Sunset was going to be so smug, with this magical talking, (and apparently thinking) relic-

"Oh no, I don't have thoughts, I'm just talking because you imagine I ought to! Your imagination must be really great, for that to be the first thing you think of in the morning!" the magical wand said in a peppy tone..

"Yo, Trixie, what's going on?!" Gilda shouted, throwing the door open.

Trixie looked to the griffon, but when she returned her attention to the Star Rod of Dreams, it was inanimate once again, humming with magic in her hooves.

"Sunset is going to be so insufferable when she finds out about this, Gilda, Trixie simply knows it..."

Gilda's cheeks puffed out as she sighed. "Yeah, probably. Can't be any worse than you usually are, though."

"Wh-Hey!" Trixie rebuffed cleverly.

And so, in a completely contrived event prompted apropos of nothing at all, Trixie Lulamoon became the wielder of the fifth Weapon of Light. How had it arrived? Where had it come from? Questions with no good answers, and a curious, fitting, dreamlike quality to its sudden and inexplicable arrival into the hooves of its true master.

The truth of the matter was simple. In the dark of the night, in the depths of Weiss Noir's blackened tower of obsidian, deep in the Everfree Forest, a magical relic of incredible power sat plugged into a horrible, nightmarish machine. The Devil's Machine, made to harness it to bleed dreams into reality, had been meant to use the Star Rod of Dreams to produce the final Relic of Darkness, only to fail due to a certain switch being set to "M" instead of "W".

Tonight, the Star Rod of Dreams sensed a vast, imaginative, and stylish dream in the air, and in a brief flash of light, disappeared to parts unknown.

And somepony noticed.

Author's Note:

To be honest, I'm really unhappy with this chapter, but it needed to happen. Sorry, guys.

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