The Unique Properties of Dark Magic

by Shadestyle

(Present Chapter 11): It Might As Well Be Spring

Tempest's new boss is actually insane.

"Look, I understand what it is you're trying to do, I just don't get why you're doing it," Tempest says, hoping Weiss will give her a better explanation of why he's designing a fortress whose purpose is for it to be possible to break into it.

"It's really simple, Tempest, you just need to hear me out. Ponies are weak, when they aren't challenged. I've got some prophecies telling me that a specific group of ponies are going to repeatedly save the world, but the problem is, prophecies aren't a perfect science, and I'd strongly prefer if they had more experience under their belts, and some better tools to work with."

He gestures to his blueprint, spread out over the wall. "So I'm playing at villainy as a hobby. And that starts with me constructing this, the Star Road. It's got everything I need, housing and parking for your crew and your ship, security for the Star Rod of Wishes, and, of course, a staging point for me to threaten Equestria to prompt their heroes to rise up, challenge the temple, and claim the Star Rod for themselves."

Tempest visibly tries to comprehend Weiss's words. "But what do you get out of it? There's no reason to go to all of this trouble, if you're just going to force them to grow stronger, why dress it up?"

Weiss just shrugs. "It's a really... really entertaining way to enhance the insurance keeping our world from being destroyed. If you want, I can include you in my next evil plan, I swear it's a fun time messing with them."

Tempest slowly raises a hoof to her head and rubs her face.

"Ok, fine, so you've gone through all of this trouble to recruit me... To help you with what amounts to convoluted pranks?"

Weiss huffs through his nose. "What? God no. What I recruited you for is much more important," He says, slowly mulling over a modified version of a speech he knows by heart before reciting the paraphrased scene to Tempest, slipping into his best impression.

"Please, use your imagination. Do you ever wonder why only a handful of malign beings make their way into Equestria and other civilized locales, such that a Princess and her buffoonish guards are enough to stop them nowadays?" He pauses for effect.

"Risk Management."

"Celestia and the other powers of this world have seen fit to seal up every noteworthy foe larger than a single hoof, so only very small, and crafty evils get through."

"But I have sensed creatures... The size of shopping malls, buried within crystals so potent that there's simply no way out from within."

"What if one of these ancient bindings were undone, so any monster that was once trapped within could pass at their leisure, regardless of size or strength?"

"What an unpleasantly exciting world that would be."

Weiss stands up from his chair, and walks over to the table near his desk, picking up a bottle of some sparkling, bubbling liquid and pouring himself a glass. "Celestia wants to run the world with Harmony, but what if it could be run by fear, by monsters?"

"There's a evil coming who wants to completely redefine the food chain. But not even you and your crew are enough to complete my plans to destroy him."

"The real power is in the Element Bearers, but Equestria's so soft that they'll be unwilling to train and prepare for what's to come... Unless there was a wild card."

"I've got less than a year to finish preparations for a vengeance one-thousand years in the making, and with your help, I will exact it."

"But in the meantime? We'll have fun playing with the locals. Enjoy some good food, some relaxation, some amenities, all on me."

Tempest mulls over his words, but something doesn't seem right. She's got enough experience to understand motives like his, and this is clearly personal. So, the question is...

"What about after that?" Tempest questions.

Weiss gives her a strange look, as though he hadn't really seriously considered it. "I..."

He shrugs, taking a sip from his glass. "Well, after that, my work will be done. I take care of the evil to come. The villain is slain. The heroes rejoice."

"I'll finally be able to rest easy."

See, now that's the sort of answer Tempest had been hoping he wouldn't have to that question.

At least she's got an idea of how to repay him, after she's done helping him with his plans.

"So you called your planned housing for me and my crew 'Star Road'. Why is it called that, when it doesn't look like a road at all?" Tempest says, changing the topic and looking over the star-shaped structure Weiss claims is going to be built as permanent housing and assigned to her.

Weiss smiles. "I'm glad you asked, you see, it's actually based on an ancient legend, about a road that wishes were ferried along to be granted. One version of the story actually calls the place itself 'Star Haven', but I've just been calling the entire thing 'Star Road', like it was in the original version."

Tempest sneaks a glance to the doorway of Weiss's office as he begins his long winded story. She'll confront the rat later. It wouldn't do for her boss's careful bluffs and reputation to be ruined by more of his secrets slipping out.

She's almost certain by now that Weiss Noir loves keeping an air of mystery and theatrics to his actions, and it's hard enough to do that when the rat reading his screenplay continues to try and peek behind the stage curtains and spoil the plot.

Weiss snaps his fingers to get her attention.

"Alright, now that Sunset's done spying on me, we can discuss my actual plans. Namely, I'm going to see if Celestia has the Alicorn Amulet, and if she does, I'm going to blow up her castle and rob it."

Tempest almost giggles at just the sheer shock-value of what he just said, but manages to choke down the laughter at the last possible moment.

---

"I fail to see how manual labor will be enjoyable," Tempest says, as she and Weiss walk up to a skating Pinkie Pie enjoying time on the frozen lake.

"Shh, this is going to be great. Hey, Pinkie Pie! Working hard or hardly working?" Weiss shouts to the pink mare, who waves back as she skates on one hoof.

"Hi Weissy! Here for evil?" Pinkie questions, skidding up to the pair.

"Oh you know it sister. I'm just waiting for Twilight to come by before I start my monologuing, you can go back to what you're doing, don't let us bother you."

"Okie Dokie!" Pinkie nods, prepared to leap back out onto the ice.

"Oh, I'll be over in a few weeks to throw a dungeon party, hope you don't mind!" she says, spinning in place before skidding out with grace.

Tempest gives me a questioning look. "That sounds like a security breach."

Weiss smiles "Don't worry, she's a trustworthy security breach."

Tempest rolls her eyes good-naturedly at that, cottoning on to his standard-operating-procedures quicker than most.

Before long, and after creating a small throne of black ice, and a folding chair of black ice for Tempest, Twilight arrives, before, with an internal groan of dismay, she notices Weiss.

"Hello, Weiss. Care to explain the bucking doorbell you installed in the library without my permission?"

"No, but I can explain my plans for today. You see, I've grown weary of all this cold weather, so I believe I'll participate in Winter Wrap-Up."

"Aren't I so kind?" he finishes, arousing Twilight's suspicion.

"You do know that Ponyville was founded by Earth Ponies, right? You can't use your magic to help with things."

Weiss chuckles to himself, crossing his arms behind his head. "I've never been one for tradition though. In fact, I think some traditions were made to be broken, unless, of course, you disagree?"

Twilight plants her hooves firmly. "I'm not going to let you mess with Ponyville's traditions, just because it's easier doesn't mean it's right. Ponyville has been wrapping up winter for years without using a bit of magic. It's part of its culture!"

Weiss's smile widens, as he looks up to the sky. "Someone should tell the pegasi that, then. I've never seen one of them fly without magic, after all. Or how about the Earth Ponies? They don't even realize how much of their strength comes from their own magic."

"No, I think this year's Winter Wrap-Up will be a lot more enjoyable with some... Hired Help."

Twilight braces for impact when Weiss's horn lights up with a dim purple light, and from it, four specters emerge, Pony shaped masses of Rocks, Wind, Fire and Water, respectively.

"What do you think of my butlers, dear? They're a personal favorite of mine whenever I need to do some spring cleaning."

"If you disagree with their methods, you could always try to convince them to stop, but..."

The Rock Specter steps in front of the others, grinning maliciously with its blocky tombstone teeth.

"They can be a bit hardheaded," Weiss finishes, smiling as Twilight summons the Master Sword into her magical grip.

"Oh good, you've got some fight in you. Well, you'd best be after them, in that case. Tata for now," Weiss says, walking off as his specters rush away in all four directions to different locations.

Tempest watches Twilight grit her teeth as she trots over to the frozen lake, where Pinkie is trying to skate around and avoid the rocky monster skidding around on the ice.

'Ok, this is pretty entertaining' Tempest thinks to herself, watching the unicorn fumble around with that weapon of hers.

'I see what Weiss meant by them not knowing how to fight, though.' Her internal monologue continues as she watches Twilight try to reach out far over the ice with her sword to swat the rock monster.

---

Twilight feels like pulling her hair out when she's unable to reach the creature with telekinesis.

"Twilight, we gotta do something about that thing before it does all my work for me!" Pinkie says, sliding over near enough to speak.

Twilight wracks her brain trying to come up with something, when a voice brings her out of her contemplation.

"You're going to need to get close enough to actually hit it, if you plan on using that weapon of yours," Tempest Shadow says casually, walking up to the duo.

"Well, it's not like I can just skate over there myself, I've never skated before!" Twilight responds, watching the rocky thing scratch gouges in the ice.

Tempest points to it. "It's avoiding the cracks in the ice that it makes. You can use that to lure it over to one of the edges. Always try to figure out a weakness when you're observing an enemy."

Twilight notices what Tempest pointed out, before nodding. "Right, Pinkie, I need you to try and lure it over here, skate near it and try to herd it!"

Pinkie salutes, jumping back onto the frozen lake and skating over with determination.

While the pink pony tries to block off the Rock Specter, Tempest further corrects Twilight's battle strategy.

"You're holding that sword wrong. It's balanced like a griffon or a minotaur sword, not a unicorn one. You're holding the entire weapon, but the center-of-mass is in the middle, instead of near the bottom."

"Focus your grip on only the handle, or you're going to lose most of the power in your swings trying to compensate, or worse, you'll just be spinning the sword around without swinging it properly."

Twilight is confused at how this unicorn mare knows so much about combat, that she can tell that much about a sword just by looking at it, but follows her advice, shrinking her telekinetic grip so it only covers the sword's handle, unlike before, when she simply held the weapon, blade and all, in an even coating.

"Who are you, anyway? I'm Twilight Sparkle," she says, getting ready to swing.

"Tempest Shadow. Now make sure the edge is straight pointed in the direction of your swing, Sparkle. If it's even slightly off-center, you'll lose cutting power," Tempest says simply, as the Rock Monster careens towards them.

Twilight, listening to her advice, tries to follow it, swinging the Master Sword somewhat clumsily, but with extreme force.

The blade ignites in a flare of white light as it cleaves through the monster like ballistic gel falling into a plane propeller. The Rock Specter explodes in puffs of purple smoke that swirl away into nothing.

Pinkie arrives shortly afterwards. "Thanks Twilight! Now I can get the rest of this lake scored up the old-fashioned way."

Twilight nods, before turning and running towards where she believes one of Weiss's other spells ran off to. "You're welcome Pinkie, thanks for the advice Tempest, I have to track down those other monsters, sorry to run off like this!"

Twilight is a bit surprised when the plum-colored mare actually follows after her.

"I've got some free time," Tempest shrugs, trotting after Twilight with a much more natural gait than the bookish unicorn's more frantic scramble.

She's a bit surprised that the baby dragon riding on Twilight's back has been asleep this whole time, with how jerky Twilight's running is.

---

Weiss puts on the fake Alicorn Amulet that he made to his exacting specifications, pulls up his camera, and snaps the selfie photo, waving it to help it develop.

In the corner of the photograph, he writes; "Hi Princess! Wish you were here! I think its my color! Yours Truly, Weiss Noir."

He then applies a tiny black crystal to the photo, before covering it up with a wax stamp.

"Let's see if I can make a princess jump on command," Weiss chuckles to himself, before biting his tongue and emitting a puff of dragonfire, sweeping the photograph away in a cloud of smoke to Canterlot.

Pulling out a complicated looking controller, he clicks a button that makes the mirror in his room light up, displaying the stats of his little spy.

---

Princess Celestia jumps in shock when she sees the artifact around Weiss's neck in his picture.

Eventually, though, the poor quality of the fake sticks out to her like a sore hoof, and she chuckles.

"Did he really think that would trick me into thinking he had already stolen it from me?" she mutters softly, before throwing the photo onto the table and continuing her tea time unruffled by Weiss's bluff.

She'll be sure to check the vault later today, however. In case Weiss is running a double-bluff. It pays to be sure when unfathomably powerful magical artifacts are involved.

What she doesn't notice, however, is the softly buzzing chip of crystal in the wax seal, relaying her words back to Weiss.

---

"Oh goodie. I get to go with Plan A," Weiss sneers happily.

"Alright Princess, enjoy your tea. I'll be over to pick up my things soon enough."

Chuckling to himself, he sets down the controller and turns to a small bottle on his table. "Malifessence" is displayed in simple cursive on the bottle's label.

"This is going to be so much fun."

He picks up the bottle, and deposits it safely inside a portal to one of his secret vaults.

---

Twilight tries to slash apart the Wind Specter, but it keeps flying out of reach while Fluttershy panics and tries to calm the animals that its loud whistling are awaking rudely.

"Any advice for this one, Tempest?" Twilight says with some frustration.

Tempest rolls her eyes, sitting on a rock nearby. "When a strategy isn't working, stop using it. Don't you have spells you can try?"

Twilight realizes with some embarrassment that she's been too focused on using the Master Sword to try one of her numerous types of spellcraft.

"Right, sorry," Twilight says sheepishly, sheathing the Master Sword on her back and unleashing a blast of magic. "A weighting charm aught to do the trick!"

The pinpoint laser from her horn rushes up to the flying enemy and pierces through it, turning its white winds into purple ones, and dragging it to the ground as it whistles madly and tries to scramble away on the ground.

Before it can get far, Twilight fires off a raw blast of arcane impact, blasting the windy devil apart.

Twilight turns to Fluttershy, who is trying to comfort a trio of crying baby snakes. "Oh there there, the scary noises are gone now."

Twilight cringes at this. "Sorry I couldn't get here sooner, Fluttershy, Weiss has sent these darn things all over Ponyville to ruin Winter Wrap-Up!"

Fluttershy shakes her head. "Don't worry about it Twilight, go help the others, and I'll take care of things here."

Twilight nods. "Sorry again for the inconvenience."

Tempest follows Twilight at a relatively sedate pace while Twilight herself huffs and puffs.

"You really should get more exercise, Sparkle. Try running like I am, you'll last longer," Tempest snarks lightly, skipping ahead so Twilight can observe the proper way to gallop long distances.

---

"Sunset, dear, you've got a package!" Weiss shouts through the P.A system of the black tower, prompting the cinnamon mango swirled unicorn to get up form her seat and trot to Weiss's office.

When she gets there, she spots Weiss's smarmy grin, unchanged from the day she met him. In his hand, he holds a bright red strip of fabric, clearly and heavily enchanted.

"Say hello to the cure for what ails you. The Super Ribbon! It might not grant immunity to instant death, but it's the closest I can get on my budget."

Sunset takes the ribbon in her hoof, looking at Weiss with no small amount of suspicion. "And there's no catch? Even after finding out what I've been doing? It's not going to come to life and do something humiliating?"

Weiss snickers. "Really? Sunset, kid, if I wanted to do something to you, I'd just fucking do it. I cultivate a reputation of consistency. If I say that the ribbon itself isn't cursed, then it isn't cursed."

"The only reason I would have to be upset over you spying on me and plumbing my secrets is because you aren't ready for them. You aren't ready for a lot of things, to be frank, but the Grimoire Weiss is most certainly one of them."

Sunset balks at this as she ties the Super Ribbon around her neck. "Then why not take it back?"

Weiss shrugs. "The fact that you're saying that implies that there's no point. Celestia has almost certainly photocopied all the pages already, and I'm obviously not going to be writing anything more in it if it can be translated."

"You've really taught me a lesson about writing down anything I discover."

For some reason, the blunt way that Weiss claims he no longer has any intention of recording his work causes Sunset to feel a pang of disappointment.

"And there's nothing I can say to convince you otherwise?" Sunset says with a sudden bitter taste in her mouth.

Weiss's stare turns distant, and when he returns to the present, his eyes glitter with a hard glare. "Why would I waste my time doing that?"

Sunset just leaves the room when he says this, looking at the Grimoire Weiss she had been reading through avidly when she reaches her quarters.

Did she just kill the golden goose?

---

The crack of Applejack's whip marks an upturn in her frustration as she tries to keep the Flame and Water Specters from melting the snow on her farm and taking the water away.

"Applejack, are you alright?" Twilight says, running up next to her.

"I'm fine Twi, do you know what the hay is going on here? These things have been trying to clear out the snow, and I am rightly ticked off!"

And indeed, Applejack's statement rings true, as most of Sweet Apple Acres is only mildly damp from the Flame Specter melting the snow, and the Water Specter ensuring that the melting snow doesn't flood the area.

"Yeah, Weiss made these things to try and speed up Winter Wrap-Up, I've been destroying all the ones I can find, I think these two are the last ones."

Applejack snorts. "I'm gonna kick that fool where the sun don't shine, I sware it," Applejack says through her grit teeth.

The Fire and Water specters giggle at the duo, while Tempest stands behind the pair.

Tempest offers her suggestion for Twilight. "You'll need to work together to kill these ones. Look at the way they're sticking close to one another? They're working in tandem too effectively."

Twilight nods, having noticed the same thing herself. "Applejack, I can get them away from one another, but I'll have to use magic to do it. Which one do you want to take care of first?"

Applejack whips at the air, cracking the air to drive the Fire Specter away from one of her trees. "It don't matter none Twi, just get it done and I'll take em down. They're too squirrely for me to pin one of em down,"

Twilight nods, slowly pacing around the pair of cackling specters, activating her horn and preparing to cast a spell.

Before she can finish the spell though, she realizes these specters must be smarter than the last two, as they briefly combine their powers to emit a haze of steam that obscures the sight of them.

"I can't see!" Twilight shouts, prompting Tempest to rub her forehead slightly.

"Complaining isn't a combat tactic!" Tempest shouts back. Hopeless, the lot of them.

Twilight backs away from the cloud of steam, trying to come up with a solution.

'Every spell acts like its caster... So what would Weiss do?'

She looks up.

"Applejack, hit the top of the cloud!"

Applejack nods, snapping her head forward and throwing the whip's tip up into the air, where it cracks with a roar of flame.

The cloud of steam disperses as the Flame Specter explodes, leaving behind nothing but the Water Specter, which, seeing that its prospects are dipping by the second, decides to try to make a speedy escape, before Tempest, having maneuvered behind it, fires a beam of magic through it's head and disperses it.

"Good work," Tempest offers, trotting off now that her work's done. She has to admit, that was pretty fun.

Twilight's head tilts. "What a weird pony."

---

Celestia, having finished her tea, decides to go off and check up on the vault of dark artifacts.

When she has left the room completely, the photograph that was left on her table rumbles, floating into the air as the wax on it cracks like a cocoon, releasing a small orb of black crystal, which expands, unfolds, and grows into a flapping ball of fuzz and feathers, with batlike wings and a single, bright purple eyeball.

Silently, and swiftly, the little eyeball flaps it's way after Princess Celestia, following her all the way to the vault, watching...

Recording.

---

Twilight sits on a bench, dismayed that she failed to really help out with Winter Wrap-Up, as she was too busy trying to stop Weiss from "helping".

Spike sleeping through the whole thing didn't really improve her mood that much either. Although he was a lot more tired looking than he usually is.

Mayor Mare, looking absolutely frazzled, ends up walking by Twilight, turning to her with desperation. "I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but perhaps you should help with something? We're behind enough as it is!"

"Behind?" Twilight asks. How could they be behind after Weiss's magic tore through all of the tasks?

"Yes, behind! Just like the year before this, and the year before that! We're behind on bringing birds back from migration, we're behind on making nests, we're behind on removing the winter clouds so we can bring in the spring ones!"

Mayor Mare looks at Twilight with annoyance, mistaking her thinking for laziness.

"Oh, Celestia... Spring is going to be late again. Another year of scandal and shame. If only we could be more organized."

Before Mayor Mare can walk off, Twilight suddenly jumps to her hooves. "Wait, did you say organized?"

Well, that's certainly something she's better at than fighting off magical monstrosities...

---

Spike drowsily writes down the words Twilight dictates to him.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

Winter Wrap Up was one of the most special things I've ever been a part of here in Ponyville. It helped me to learn we all have hidden talents, and if we work hard, we're sure to find and cultivate them, and as always, with good friendship and guidance, ponies can accomplish anything.

Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle."

"What do you think, Spike?"

Spike shrugs as he blinks sleep out of his eyes. "It'll do?"

Twilight giggles. "What's got you so tired, Spike?"

Spike blankly snaps his claws, creating a portal to Celestia and stuffing the letter through it, Celestia's surprised face blinking before he closes it.

"Been practicing hard," He says blankly, before falling back to sleep with a yawn.

Author's Note:

Weiss Speech paraphrased from Sakyo's Speech from "Yu Yu Hakkusho".

The song of the day is "It Might As Well Be Spring".

Comments

[Mordred]

I've always disliked the 'Winter Wrap-up' episode, if only because they hold out on tradition over everything else, even over what is arguably several to even a dozen times better, just because it doesn't fall in line with 'tradition'.

[Nightsclaw]

I like this chapter, it has a charm to it. Weiss trolling and Tempest teaching were both very well done. I can't wait to see how other threats are dealt with after the training and loot that the Main 6 get will all this stuff that is happening.

[Professor Litmus]

D.Gray-man recon golem.

[Fireeaters]

Nice

[zoruatrainer66]

Nice to see Weiss's reaction to the secret stealing, also are those elementals really his bulters?

[Shadestyle]

9699311

They're not actual living things, but Weiss does use those shaped spells for cleaning purposes, since they can act intelligently.

[Vigriff]

Weiss is showing some good genre savviness by not having to record any future findings in his book.

[Mix-up]

I wonder how Shining armor would match against Tempest in both combat skill and command? I best out come would be that Tempest would shatter and mop the floor with him making him the laughing stock of him and that she would his ball on the prow of her ship.

[nighters]

awww spike working so hard!

[8bitmadness]

9699754
True, but I was commenting from the assumption that certain artifacts were made from unique materials, and as such Weiss making them deprives their original creators of the chance to do so.

[thefroggyninja]

9699838
Why would he do that though? If he wanted them he could just wait for someone else to make it without having to put in the time, effort or risk of wasting unique materials.

[hades21]

Spike blankly snaps his claws, creating a portal to Celestia and stuffing the letter through it, Celestia's surprised face blinking before he closes it.

lololololololololololololololololo

[Asolem2]

"Complaining isn't a combat tactic!" Tempest shouts back. Hopeless, the lot of them.

Yes, they are