Improbable Aftermath
The Canterlot Herald
The apex of journalism
SPECIAL EDITIONCELESTIA SCANDAL: SIX SURPRISE SOVEREIGNS!
Drastic Governmental Shift
Celestia Sacked. Luna Crowned High Princess.
by TRENDING TOPICCANTERLOT—Last night, then-Princess Celestia managed to both triple the known alicorn population and upend Equestrian governance as we know it in one fell swoop.
Earlier that day in Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle, Celestia's personal student, cast the incomplete masterpiece of the archmage Star Swirl the Bearded at the former ruler's direction. The resulting magical cascade is still being analyzed, but researchers say that the preliminary results are astonishing.
"The spell resonated through the Elements of Harmony," said Riddle Cruller, Archchancellor of Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. "The Bearers shared one another's memories, resulting in a level of rapport beyond even the most powerful psychomantic techniques. [Professor Stubborn] Ponder says this combined their magic exponentially, resulting in the explosive release that the filly will be able to clean off of her floor as soon as we're done with it."
More pressing in most minds were the political ramifications. With parts of the government still adjusting to the return of High Princess Luna, the incorporation of six new princesses, Jacqueline Apple, Rarity Belle, Rainbow Dash, Pinkamena Pie, Fluttershy Poseysfilly, and Twilight Sparkle, would've been wholly infeasible. Miss Sparkle ushered the other princesses into a secure room of Castle Canterlot in what is now recognized as the first meeting of the Council of Alicorns, with Empress Mi Amore Cadenza participating in the final vote via dragonfire post.
Twilight Sparkle announced the formation of the council at 2:00 AM today. The title of Equestrian Princess would no longer be recognized. Luna was elected and crowned high princess, with the other eight serving as councilmares. Furthermore, Councilmare Celestia was officially sanctioned for her reckless actions. Councilmare Sparkle would not comment on the nature of these sanctions, only that "They fit the nature of the misdemeanor and the best way to address it." Councilmare Sparkle confirmed that Councilmare Celestia will continue her duty of raising and lowering the sun.
Only time will tell how this drastic change will impact our nation.
Trending Topic, like this typesetter, is very tired and going to bed now.
The Ponyville Express
All the news that wasn't eatenNew Teacher at Ponyville Elementary
by NAMBY PAMBYPONYVILLE—A new teaching assistant, Miss Sunny Skies, has been hired at Ponyville Elementary, leading to a mixed reaction throughout the town.
"Don't get me wrong," said Cheerilee Punch, until now the sole teacher at the school, "my job has always been a joy. But it's gotten rather more eventful lately, and I could certainly use the help."
Some of the students are less pleased. "I can play Miss Cheerilee like a fiddle," said one student who wished to remain anonymous, "but some newcomer? It's going to take a long time to get her where I want her, and until then, she's going to think she's in charge."
When asked about her fellow Canterlotter, Councilmare Twilight Sparkle said, "I've known Sunny for a long time. She'll definitely be able to do a lot of good here in Ponyville, as long as Cheerilee keeps a close eye on her. She can get a little extreme without some supervision and stress relief."
Miss Skies herself seemed very optimistic. "I look forward to giving the young minds of Ponyville exactly what they need to flourish."
Namby Pamby is the Ponyville Express's cub reporter and education columnist.
Dearest "Sunny,"
Firstly, my sympathies for the disgraceful slander the news-papers are bandying about as objective analysis. As I have told you since my return, this "free press" of yours carries a cost that mounts higher with every passing day.
Aside from those scurrilous scandalmongers, your idea seems to be working well, even as Canterlot recovers from its shock over the new alicorns and sudden shift of power. That being said, expect many more letters in the near future. You have made a city of schemers upon the Canterhorn, and my millennial absence, the Bearers' inexperience, and Cadence's duties in the Crystal Empire will leave us ill-suited against them without your counsel. The messaging spell and my receiving frequency remain as you remember them. If further security is needed, send the details through young Spike.
Beyond that, enjoy your vacation. You have more than earned it. Indeed, were I not privy to your earlier intentions and had I missed your slack-jawed astonishment, I would have thought this to be your goal all along.
With love,
Luna
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Yeeeeeeeeeeees.
I would actually like more, but this is hilarious.
eh, parts I like, parts I don't
Alright, that was hilarious. Kudos.
(Yay Discworld references)
Lighthearted fun at its finest. Thank you—this brought me a fair few smiles on a day that needed them.
"...resulting in the explosive release that the filly will be able to clean off of her floor as soon as we're done with it."
Now you've done it. I need to write a fic where the Equestrian Protection Agency moves into the Golden Oak library after the alicorn ascention and blocks it off, preventing Twilight Sparkle from going home.
Agent: "I'm sorry, Princess Twilight Sparkle. This is a known contamination zone. I'm afraid I can't let you inside."
Twilight: But all of my stuff is in there. All of my books are in there! I have ongoing experiments!
Agent: Confiscated and currently undergoing deconamination.
Discworld References!
Other Fanfic References! (Sunny Skies-es)
Governmental Changes!
Quirky Newspaper Epiphets!
I like this. So much!
6508609
...Looking at it again, it turns out I read the sentence wrong. I'm in the wrong here! Thanks for pointing that out.
marvellous.
I liked this. It was simple, but you took it places I didn't expect.
Although, I really don't see what that last part of the third chapter adds to the story, really.
Bad Celly! Bad!
Go to your room!
Councilmare Luna dammit !!!!! I can´t give more upvotes to this !!!!!! Why, why, whyyyyyyyyyyy !?!?
6508699 Sunny Skies is a very common Celestia alternate identity in various works here...it´s a pegasus, if I remember coorectly, that she uses to merge with the common pony when the stress is too high and she need a break, or to reconnect with her fellow ponies.
6508759 Aaah, that explains a lot. Thank you for clarifying!
Excellent. But . . . .Celestia being stripped of power? That seems a bit harsh. A long leave of absence, perhaps.
She is going to enjoy being a teacher far too much, although thanks to Kimono's Townhouse, I will forever think of her as being in tech support.
Really enjoyed this. The Discworld influences were fun, too!
Okay, this is gone nuts. The only thing that would make it nuttier is to have Best Pony insert herself into the situation.
6508553
It is tempting to think of the Mane Six trying to go about their lives normally in spite of their new appendages and the baggage that comes with them. And the changes to everything from Equestria Girls on. Hmm...
I'm not making any promises, but I may revisit this.
6508558
Would you care to go into further detail about each?
6508589
Glad to be of service.
6508614
To say nothing of the Equestrian Geographic Society trying to capture everything for posterity, along with the freelance "archeologists."
Twilight: A. K. Yearling? Oh my goodness, what are you doing here?
A. K. Yearling: Oh, you know, looking for inspiration. I mean, friendship explosions? Right up Daring's alley. Does this look like an ancient artifact to you?
Twilight: I bought that waffle iron last week.
Totally not Daring Do: Well, recent artifact.
Twilight: It's still a waffle iron.
Ignore the pith helmet: Yes, but it was bathed in transcendent alicorn energies. Ahuizotl might be able to use it too, uh...
Twilight: Make evil waffles?
Daring Do: Exactly!
6508796
She's still on the council. This is more of an enforced vacation than anything, though Diamond Tiara will be trying her hardest to make it less of one.
6508847
I considered it, but I figured that would be overkill.
This was amazing.
Would definitely love to see you expand on this.
6508859 Princess Twilight Sparkle (PTS): Spike! Just why are you selling 'Genuine Golden Oak Library Leaves' for ten bits a piece?
Spike: Hey, the tourists are snapping them up.
PTS: It's a magically contaminated zone, Spike! They could have unknown toxins or thaumatological radiation emitting from them! Ponies could be affected!
Spike: Chill out, Twilight. The EPA won't let me take leaves from the library, so I'm using the oak tree by Caramel's house. Do you really think ponies could be affected by thaumatol... magical radiation from the leaves?
PTS: Yes! Well, actually probably not. But the EPA says so, even though my scans haven't turned up anything yet.
Spike: Could they turn ordinary ponies into alicorns? Theoretically, of course.
PTS: Well... I suppose there could be a microscopic chance... What are you writing, Spike?
Wait, why'd LUNA become High Princess? Everyone agrees Twilight's smarter and more sensible. And not woefully outdated and obsolete.
6508821
Spike's G3 name is actually "Master Kenbroath Gilspotten Heathspike."
This was absolutely brilliant. I loved how Celestia got her comeuppance for her harebrained scheme after it went awry. Nosy old busybody's had it coming for a while.
One of your best. Great work.
6509004
Two words:
"Best Princess".
6509004
Most experience running a nation, even if a lot of it is out of date. Besides, she's not doing it alone. There's a whole bureaucracy beneath her that's at least theoretically full of ponies who know what they're doing, and Celestia's still the next town over if needed.
6509006
Ah. Well. I'm clearly wrong then.
What, they didn't include Pinkie's middle name?
I think my favorite part of this chapter is the Ponyville Express tagline. Which isn't to say that the rest of it was bad, but come on! That tagline is friggin' hilarious!
6508859 I would dearly love to see more of this. It was just the pick me up I needed. I just found out my good friends lost their 3 year old son this morning and I really needed something to keep me from getting depressed. Yes I was a bit close to the kid and had hopes of becoming much closer as he got older. Thank you very much for something this light hearted at a time I needed it.
I want to read more of this
Pretty disappointed that it just became another "Celestia's so stupid" fic. I dislike them, I think they're way overdone and disagree with a lot of their interpretations. However the first two chapters were funny enough that you get a like.
I'm surprised Twilight decided to cast the spell anyway.
Eeeee this was amazing.
Normally I'd write at least a couple paragraphs on why I liked it so much, but right now I'm really tired, and anyway I can probably just sum it up as "everything".
Also, I've been meaning to get myself a Top Favourites bookshelf for a while, and now seems like a really good time to do so...
Are we going to see more of Teacher Sunny Days?
I enjoyed this unconditionally.
6509125
I'm no political expert or anything but I don't think its a good idea to give the highest position in the government to someone that's a thousand years out of date and who's idea of becoming the most popular princess is to try and forcefully overthrow those whom are more popular than you are. In actuality it wouldn't be far fetched to say that the only reason Luna didn't see any political ramifications for her actions is because Celestia was in power at the time. In other words I don't think any of them are fit to be in an elevated position, would have made much more sense to have them all as equals.
>Riddle Cruller
>Stubborn Ponder
I see what you did there... and I quite like it!
6509487
Hence, the council.
Am I the only one who finds this quote extremely ominous, considering: a) "Sunny"´s latest mishap and b) the presence of the Cutie Mark Crusaders under her tutelage.
Fun, short story. I hope this winds up getting a sequel exploring all the Alicorn shenanigans.
Turns out there's fun in making sense after all. Suck it, Discord.
Ha!
This was fun. Good work.
6509240 Hey look, people dislike this comment because we're not supposed to get sick of "Celestia is stupid" crap. Three people (and counting by the time I'm done with this) hate others for being sick of bullshit they make up.
6508732 belpheles.com/memes/unamusedSebastian.gif
6509602
I now want to see a sequel covering the events of B.
6509125 Haha, sounds like the backdrop of a certain *little* post-apocalyptic story I once read. I dig the happier outcome here though. =)
Very nice! I like!
I hope you don't mind, but I've nominated this story for the group Less Wrong, in honor of its very well handled rationalist themes.
6508859
It reminds me of "Remedial course on Jedi ethics, you need." http://darthsanddroids.net/episodes/0141.html
6509106
Heresy!
6509125
I believe Spykoranuvellitar comes from MLP Time Loops. Whether that was inspired by something else I don't know, but I think it was the first instance of the name in gen 4 fan fiction. I do know it has been picked up by other authors since then.
6509779 In all fairness there were more upvotes then downvotes on my comment. At least, as of writing, anyway.
6508859 great plot and some funny moments. But there's to much mean spirited stuff. They strip Celestia of power for giving them grounds to take the power they took. Overall, I have no problem saying Twilight is smarter than Celestia. I do have one saying she's wiser which this seems to suggest
I'm not one for Equestrian revolutions, I've never seen one I like in fact, but I'd love to see this council have to deal with the consequences of how their new government looks. The mare who tried to rule the nation in the past rules in place of Celestia, the six ponies who defeated her last now are alicorns and have all kinds of new powers and power and Celestia is gone, with only their word she's still raising the sun. It's a nice little conspiracy