• Member Since 14th Oct, 2015
  • offline last seen 7 hours ago

Unwhole Hole


Digging it deeper. Always deeper.

T

Investigating primitive radio transmissions detected on a long-range Federation listening post, the Enterprise investigates a planet far in the unexplored border space of the Alpha Quadrant. There, they discover a primitive planet just starting its industrial revolution--a planet complete with extensive lunar colonization and in the process of launching its first warp-capable ship.

The failure of the alien ship initiates first contact--with a race of adorable talking horses. A first contact with some unique diplomatic idiosyncrasies--and hints of a more sinister plot behind the warp-vessel's destruction.

Chapters (13)
Comments ( 265 )

Great start blending everything. Lols to Celestia having forseen their first contact and written out instructions

:raritystarry: A Gorn? My little Spikey just nibbled your silly crystals in your main engineering , He's a growing dragon after all

:facehoof: Captain Crunch er Kirk , How do you like your tea?

:ajbemused: A Country Doctor? In a pigs eye,,,

:flutterrage: Discord ! That space ship isn't a funny tennis racket ,,, Put Lunas moon down now! or I'll be so peeved!

:moustache: Geesh these creatures are really ugly

:pinkiegasp: I want to be the first to kiss an alien!

:trollestia: I know , I'll give them cake!

A interesting approach thats refreshingly more in line with the sci-fi horror of the original series. Only complaint is Kirk not doing anything until the equestrian ship broke. Kirk was a maverick. Most of the original series was him interfering with pre warp societies. Still enjoyed

Dancer One.
I like that prototype ship name :ajsmug:

What if they’ve dressed the Command-Wizard in fetish gear too?! What if they’re that kind of aliens?! They could have dressed her in socks and a tight saddle!”

“And blinders,” said the gray equine, her eyes widening and her breathing becoming more heavy. “And a bit...and lots and lots of leather...and they ride her around and beat her with a riding crop--”

Someone REALLY needs to get laid.:facehoof:

EMH, in this time period?
No. The main part of the EMH's program is the work and personality of Doctor McCoy over his more than 50 years of service in Starfleet. Thus, the EMH cannot exist when McCoy has only served for a decade.

The pilot thinking they were hostile, and the other ponies believing that... Is Twilight the only pony that sees some strange being and DOESN'T consider it a bad thing at first sight?

Ri2

Marble, honey, something you want to tell us?

If there's anything that'll get me to read something Star Trek related despite my minimal foreknowledge, it's an Unwhole Hole adventure.

Fascinating stuff thus far. Definitely looking forward to seeing where you go with this. And here's hoping Spitfire gets blackballed for potentially wrecking first contact.

"Or ordering coffee, black, iced and getting tea, earl gray, hot."

Ohhhh...how you dare !!!!

“We have a replicator, Captain. And I am sure that one day you will, in fact, learn how to use it. If you truly apply yourself.”

And, now, we have a answer for the long awaited question: sass can, indeed, kill.

this has to continue, on the basis on the approach alone.
if this is not brought to an equally epic conclusion, it is you who is being sent out that air-lock.
but before we get to that part, I intend to see this adventure through.
preferably, in numerous chapters ; evn if preferaböy, just a bit longer, than the previous.

*sighs* I was hoping Luna would be the frontmare in this one. Tea and coffee contact is rougher than two species who properly can appreciate the same kind of cuppa in charge.

11017274
I mean, judging by Zecora's first episode? Pretty much yeah.

11017619

Ponies are both skittish and dumb. This is canon.
Still not excuse for Spitfire insulting and threatening an unknown alien race with spacefaring level of development. That´s the kind of behaviour which may end with your planet being nuked from orbit. Neither is the way you deal with a potential hostage situation.

I want it known that I am absolutely loving this story so far and would love to see it's conclusion.

It's a pretty good story, but so far the best parts are the Enterprise crew when being serious. The nods to the future series aren't doing much for me and I didn't care much for the ponies as portrayed

Hmm I’ll stick around for a few chapters and see how this goes. So far I’m enjoying this.

The ponies seem to be a little dumb but they are shown in show to be fairly xenophobic so. Well just have to see.

McCoy picked up the unicorn and held her, prepared to rush her to the inferiority

infirmary

So far; so good.

He lives!...and comes bearing a Star Trek crossover?! :raritystarry:

...Haha, I was feeling confident because I just finished a TOS (partial re-)watch a few months ago, but then I saw you're using TAS characters and I didn't watch that so now I shall prepare to be slightly more confused! I can definitely get why you'd go with TOS though—it got really wacky compared to TNG.

Spitfire needs to cut back on the cocaine a little or she's gonna blow a gasket. And Marble needs...stress relief. :rainbowwild:

Looking forward to more!

I look forward to further chapters from you, so far most logically interesting indeed.

I understand playing a little loose with canon in order to tell the story you want to tell, but the EMH is way too far ahead of its time. Also a bit too sassy; matching that of mid-series Voyager's Doctor, rather than pilot episode Doctor.

Also, the path from warp 1 to warp 5 for humanity was just 100 years, not 200. Enterprise was set in the mid 22nd century.

Spitfire needs to be fired immediately because of how dumb she acted. I'm also annoyed that you wanked ponies into being a threat to the Enterprise.

11017666

Well her sum total "military experience" is being a literal show horse. In an agency that employs a mentally unbalanced shut-in as a test pilot. With no obvious grasp of the concept of discipline among anyone. I mean its not she ever considered the possibility that their best weapon would be outclassed by a hand phaser...

Sad part. I can see Cannon ponies doing exactly this. Then complaining about getting glassed from orbit because it was a Klingon or Romulan vessel.

Great start. I'm looking forward to this.

11018190

I have to agree

This... Honestly, this is what the ponies display? A pitiful display of communication and diplomacy, along with starting a war? First impressions matter, and that, was just disappointing.

It was a miracle that they had a protocol for such an occasion, and it arrive moments before ponies sparked a war forcing they nor the humans could end. The humans would've settled for no less than the pony's magic or warp tech greater than or equivalent to the resources lost in ammunition they wasted on them upon the surrender of Equestria.

Wars have been started for less, never mind a weaponized space laser any real damage or not. You don't let a child wave around a stick try with the intent to kill no matter the impossibility of actually achieve that. Especially if that child has a priceless diamond you can take away as punishment.

I love it!
What update schedule do you have planned for this?

Coming back, I just realized. Spitfire wants to “Save” the ponies by theatening the “hostile aliens” ship which the ponies she wants to save are on… so, she wants to save the ponies, by pointing weapons at the ponies.

Very intelligent of you, Spitfire.

“Commander, look! We’re too late! They’ve already captured an adorable Abyssinian maiden and are forcing her to wear an inappropriately short skirt! They have deprived her of her basic right to PANTS!”

Okay...

This is not sitting well for me.

Does it mean that the ponies here are all prude conservatives or something!?

:rainbowhuh:

"Sun" in orbit around Equus? Check. The author is sticking with lore rather than ignoring it. This bodes well. :pinkiesmile:
Equus in orbit around distant White Dwarf Star? Ooh, nice touch! I like it! :pinkiehappy:
Pilot blames Enterprise for damage to Warp Core? Conflict! And we aren't even at 3k words yet! :pinkiecrazy:

11017274

EMH, in this time period?
No.

No replicators in this time period either. They were first introduced in The Next Generation, and then retconned into the verse by Enterprise. Kirk's ship had cooks and kitchens, and the food synthesizers were kind of like Japanese vending machines that mix and heat ingredients. Food supply limitations were a plot point in a couple episodes. Not being able to manuacture food beyond what existed in the stores, in By Any Other Name, the cook being shocked that the synthetic meat had been replaced with real meat in Charlie X, probably a few others.

But I get the impression this story is being played for laughs, and probably most readers here have never even seen the original series. Complete show accuracy probably isn't super important.

Spitfire should have known about the protocol and she's not authorized to start a war. I hope there will be consequences for Spitfire.

That said, I am going to be playing fast-and-loose with the Star Trek lore. Namely, I've reduced the bridge staff down for streamlining purposes. You'll also notice that I'm using characters from the Animated Series (like M'Ress and Arex) although changed around some of the roles (Chekov is here, but not Sulu?). So alternate universes or something? Hopefully it works okay, or even adequately.

Whoops! Almost forgot to reply to this. For this has a very simple solution: Shifts! The show(s) hand wave it away, but humans need sleep, and the Bridge shouldn't be left unattended. The easy answer for a ship the size of the Enterprise? Three crew members per position. Sure, some of them will be Ensigns learning the ropes, but it allows everyone to actually get the ship clock equivalent of eight hours of sleep.

11018430
I was going to ask about the tech level of the Reboot movies, but you calling out that the prequel was anachronistic kind of defeats the point: This fic can be as "Kitchen Sink" as it wants, and it'll still fit into one of the canon timelines somehow. :twilightoops:

...and yet, I'm fine with that. The show was always Soft Sci-Fi to begin with. As long as the fic keeps to the spirit of the franchise, it'll do a better job than some of the more recent series that the franchise has been putting out recently.

Edit: Added some groups. Hope the author is fine with that.

I'm liking this way, way more than I expected.

From this chapter, I have realized I'm reading a parody.

Well as a casual Trekkie and fan of mostly the original series, I've enjoyed it so far. Whether or not the Federation has the right tech level for the time period is inconsequential for me. Also, the ponies reactions to aliens were quite... comedic? It felt very Monty Python or Mel Brooks. I hope that was what you were going for.

Glad to see this at the top of the box. Unwhole Hole finally getting that deserved recognition.

Wow, a Star Trek crossover fic at the top of the box? Never seen that before, but I ain't complaining! Trek and Pony for the win! xD

11018459

Celestia: "Just try not to start a war while I'm gone, okay?"
Spitfire: "Mob! Mob, mob, mob, mob. Mob, mob. Angry, angry!"

11018190 Um... a 4 MW laser wouldn't even penetrate a Constitution class's navigational deflectors. The ponies are not a threat to the Enterprise. The Princesses, maybe, depending on how much control they have over the movement of the sun and moon.

Also, Spitfire demonstrating again that the ability to hoof stamp promotional pictures, fly fancily and yell at people does not translate to any degree of professional competence or common sense. Still, at least you've portrayed the Wonderbolts (absent Dash) at their canon level of ability.

Also, add a Comedy tag. If you intended to have any kind of dramatic tension, I'm afraid that's no longer an option. Nothing as ridiculous as that scene has an place in a serious story. Though as crack comedy goes, it's pretty good.

11018828

maybe the author could add a character in that scene desperately trying to shut up the others from talking and facehoofing from the stupidity

Comment posted by garfan deleted October 18th
Comment posted by garfan deleted October 18th

Well this was unexpected. Some comments are suggesting a Comedy tag, but I’d skip that and go with Random after this little scene.

You weren’t kidding about playing fast and loose with the lore. I don’t recall replicators or holograms in TOS. TNG/Voyager, sure. Iirc, TOS had synthesizers for some things but not everything.

And given Captain Archer’s dad worked with Zephram Cochrane, you’ve nearly tripled the time it took for humans to reach warp 5.

And it’s very much Random.

11018430
The NX-01 encountered replicator tech in the 2150s. It took the Federation until the early 2300s to figure out how to make it themselves, as the NX-01 never got ahold of a device, just described what it did.

As a member of STARFLEET International, this story is so all over the place with the tech, I can only say one thing:

DISQORD! Get away from that keyboard.

Kirk's enterprise did have a holodeck. It was shown during an episode of TAS, which Arex and M'Ress appeared. though the holodeck of Kirk's Enterprise was less advanced it still operated like the one on Picard's E2:pinkiehappynterprise. This story just debued the MK X EMH, The Doctor of Voyager's predecessor. And it showed a bug.
:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

tea, earl gray, hot

That's capitalized and uses the British spelling of gray: Earl Grey

11018598
I dunno if it's quite parody, the world of MLP is more comedic, we can easily assume that in the Startrek universe that translates to a culturally sensibility too. Meaning most races will find Equestrians quite eccentric, which frankly they are!

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