• Member Since 18th Jul, 2013

Lord Of Dorkness


Deep into that dorkness peering...

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Total Words: 56,648,285
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To ponies who know about such things, it was always obvious Twilight Sparkle was somepony to watch. Somepony who would one day shape the world.

But there's a big difference between knowing that somepony is a 'Chosen One' and knowing what they've been chosen for.

On one fateful and frankly annoying day, a young Twilight faces an unexpected and frustrating conflict on just that subject.

Edited by Pega-ace and SolidFire; cover art by Ruirik.

Chapters (1)
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Twilight wanted to teach Ember pony customs. Instead, she learned about unicorns, dragon eggs... and Ember’s mother.

Special thanks to ChappedPenguinLips for editing.

Chapters (1)
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With an age-old threat poised to devastate Equestria, the Princesses gather to use a spell left behind by the great Star Swirl the Bearded in order to ensure their victory.

Now all four have become an entirely new being, with her own thoughts and feelings. And in order for the Princesses to return, she will have to die.

Chapters (1)
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Where does Cadance go the fifteenth night of every month? Shining wishes he knew. She claims that she's having trouble sleeping, or that she's attending some sort of meeting with her aunts, but he can tell something is different when she comes home. He'll stop at nothing to find out what's going on.


And he'll regret knowing.

Commissioned by Backlash91, who also draws!

Chapters (1)
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What would happen if rubbing a pony's tummy turned you into a pony? We'd be doomed. That's what'd happen.

Picture related in spirit, not substance.

Chapters (1)
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The first day of school always sucks. It's particularly sucky when you're normally nocturnal.

Now an expanding anthology of one-shots due to popular demand for MOAR!

Featured on Fimfic: 10/1/2017
Featured on Equestria Daily
Now with several chapters in audio: link!
Now with commisioned music: link!

Cover Art Source

Editors/Prereaders:
Dreams of Ponies
JackRipper
Level Dasher
Jowijo

Submission for the Bat Ponies and Thestrals 2017 Competition

Chapters (23)
E

The events of this story take place during and after the episode "sonic rainboom."

Soarin's life was going great until the day of "The Young Fliers Competition," when he tried to save Rarity's life. The next day Soarin wakes up realising his wings have been transformed into girly butterfly wings. Now he has to learn to use his new wings and fight to keep his position in the Wonderbolts with the help of Rainbow Dash.

Editor: The man without a face

Artist for the cover art: Pridark

Chapters (12)
E

To any human that has found this book, I hope that you never have to experience the events that I did as I was ripped from our world and into this one. If you do end up in Equestria then hopefully this book can help you in your attempts to integrate into the new world that you have arrived into. The fact that you are reading this in the first place shows that you have the time and dedication needed to translate Equestrian into English (most likely using the convenient translation guide in the back of the book). This book may just save your life.

To any ponies reading this book. I ask that you enjoy the experience of witnessing your own culture through the eyes of an alien. A being from a world vastly different from the one you know. Don't worry though, I mean no harm. Like you, I am just a pony struggling to find a place in this world. If my experience makes it easier for another then it is my duty to share it with the world. You might even enjoy your time reading it.


Blank Slate never imagined the events that would occur after writing a semi-successful book. Most of his readers never imagined that the book was autobiographical.

Chapters (10)
T
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Baked Bean is but one of the thousands of tourists in Canterlot, and he's looking for some inspiration to help launch his writing career. To this end, he pays a visit to the Royal Gardens, but while there he quickly and quite accidentally invokes a long-forgotten law that will completely upend his life and thrust him into the spotlight...

As Celestia's husband.

And all this because of noses.


As seen on Equestria Daily!

With an audio reading by Fire Hearth Studios!

Cover art graciously provided by the Right Most Awesome Backlash91!
Original cover art provided the Right Most Awesome Sipioc!

Proofreading and prereading services provided by Georg, Sipioc, and Moon Fire!

Fan Art for this story can be found right here!

A most worthy review by Cyonix!

Chapters (32)
T

Metal ponies tell their stories,
Scientists in laboratories,
Lay the wire, mount the brain,
Mount their hips, teach them pain.
Teach them fear of revolution,
Internalize the evolution.
Set their ruin on the throne,
Until their chains become their own.
Palaces and hollow eyes,
To the Masters goes the prize.
And if this act should be maligned:
"For the good of ponykind."

Winner of the September Writeoff Contest, "True Colors." Edited by Horizon.

Chapters (6)