• Published 27th Sep 2017
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The Human's Guide to Equestria - Siras-chi



Equestria as examined by a former human being: or the effects of writing a moderately well sold book

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Reunion

Blank Slate led Astrid to a nearby cafe for their discussion. They took seats in a private corner and ordered coffee. Neither dared to speak about their familiarity - how two ponies who had never met felt like old friends the first time they laid eyes on each other.

They were even able to guess the other’s coffee order.

Astrid tried to find hints of the man who haunted her dreams. Blank Slate was slightly older than her; taller, too. His eyes shared the color of the ones she saw in her sleep. So much reminded her of what she had tried to forget long ago.

She had so much she wanted to ask, so much she needed to know.

“Astrid, was it? That sounds Griffish,” Blank Slate stated in a blatant attempt to start a conversation. She appreciated the opening. Astrid had been afraid that they would just sit and stare at each other while drinking coffee, sitting back and watching as the awkwardness grew between them.

“It is, actually. My parents found me in their garden when I was a foal. Even though I wasn’t a griffin, they took me in as part of their flock.” Back when I knew nothing of this world. Astrid wished she could say that. Try as she might though, the words wouldn’t come. “I lived most of my life in the southwest Griffin Kingdoms. It was only recently I moved to this country. I still find it strange to not be surround by my siblings all the time”

Astrid was stalling. If she wanted, she could talk about her family for hours; yet there was still the chance that Blank Slate was a fraud who had already spoken to her family. It was extremely unlikely that he had done so, but she desperately wanted Blank Slate to have a reason to have known about her world that didn’t involve him living there before.

“But I didn’t come here to tell you about my family.” Astrid had planned this out on the train over. She’d confront him, he’d know nothing, and she could get back to her life without ever dreaming of humans again. “I came to ask you about your book.”

Blank Slate straightened in his seat. He’d expected The Guide had been the reason behind this conversation. The stallion let the nervous mare in front of him take all the time she needed to speak. Besides, he dared not speak now. He barely dared to hope for the possibility that Astrid was quite literally the mare of his dreams. That she could prove his memories were more than just dreams.

“I first heard about your book during the interview you did. It reminded me of the games I played with my siblings when I was a foal. I would imagine another world filled with technology beyond anything this world has ever seen.” Astrid had Blank Slate’s full attention now. “I would dream that I had a family that looked like me, and that I had someone who loved me. My own personal Prince Charming. That we had been separated by a wild spell.”

“And what is it you wanted to ask me?” Blank Slank had a strong feeling that he knew what Astrid wanted to know. There was very little in the book that couldn’t be found with just a bit of independent research, which meant she was asking about something that couldn’t be found outside of The Guide.

“Were you a human too?” Astrid forced herself to ask, knowing that the answer could destroy everything about the lie she built around herself. A simple yes or no question that could rewrite her life, asked in a way that meant any answer was a confirmation.

She had asked in a language that wasn’t found in Equestria, or in The Guide.

And Blank Slate responded in kind. That was proof enough for the both of them. Finally, they had found another human among ponies.

“I was right, I was right the entire time.” Astrid cried out, having not yet deciding if she should be laughing in joy, or crying at the pain she had put herself through while blocking out the human side of her life since she was a filly.

Blank Slate had no such internal debates. He was simply happy that he had managed to find another human. “I have so many questions for you.” Blank Slate wanted to know where she had landed, how old she was as a human, and how she got to Equestria. However, Astrid seemed to have settled on crying at the perceived loss of her equine identity for the moment. “Astrid, how about we continue this discussion at my place. It’s nearby, and if you need it I can sleep on the couch and lend you the bed.”

Astrid stopped crying and nodded at Blank Slate’s suggestion. She wanted to get out of public after her brief outburst. More than that, she found that she trusted the stallion. There was something about him that felt so familiar to her.

“Come on then, it’s not far.”


“This is… nice.” Blank Slate’s apartment was surprisingly large and spacious compared the one Astrid lived in back in Manehattan. It also, as described by Major Key, was an “organized” mess. Blank Slate claimed that he knew exactly where everything was in his apartment; the stacks of books, bit bags, and vests that still need washing claimed otherwise.

“I know, it’s not perfect. It’s home though.” Blank Slate said as he walked Astrid towards his couch. “Can I get you anything? My kitchen’s a little empty, but I can get you something to drink.”

“No, thank you.” Astrid was feeling curiously empty after the coffee and the earth shattering revelation, but she couldn’t imagine getting anything else down. “I’m good at the moment.” She was glad to be out of public; it would be much less embarrassing if she freaked out again when only one other pony was watching.

“So, before we discuss anything else, I have a question for you that might seem a bit weird.” Blank Slate approached the other side of the couch cautiously; he didn’t want to startle his house guest again.

“We are humans from another world that are now living as a completely different species. How can it get any weirder?” Blank Slate surprisingly had never thought of it like that. With that train of thought, there really wasn’t much that was weirder than that.

“It’s just, have you had any strange dreams where you start as a human?”

“And end as a pony? Yeah.” Astrid finished Blank Slate’s statement.

“In these dreams, is there someone else with you”

“Yes.” Both were holding their breaths as the waited for the next question.

“Does the name Lie...”

It was then that the doorbell once again proved that it was the worst invention in the history of Equestria. “Hey, Doe, open up. I brought pizza! Are we doing game night or what?” Major Key unintentionally managed to both kill the mood and make Blank Slate want kill him with one single phrase.

Author's Note:

You know the drill. This chapter made possible by a wonderful editor.