• Member Since 25th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Yesterday

I Thought I Was Toast

Insanity is just creativity to the nth degree.



The first day of school always sucks. It's particularly sucky when you're normally nocturnal.

Now an expanding anthology of one-shots due to popular demand for MOAR!

Featured on Fimfic: 10/1/2017
Featured on Equestria Daily
Now with several chapters in audio: link!
Now with commisioned music: link!

Cover Art Source

Dreams of Ponies
Level Dasher

Submission for the Bat Ponies and Thestrals 2017 Competition

Chapters (23)
Comments ( 1232 )

Poor kid. Probably says bad things about my personality that I found quite a bit of this to be funny while at the same time cringing in sympathy \.


Short, sweet, good to eat!

This is adorable

This was a great story, and would lend itself for a more ... long-term slice of life production.

You get a favorite for the narrative, and a thumbs up for its quality.

There are really minor mistakes - like a 4 next to a word - but they don't detract from the story. Personally? I'd love to read more about Nightingale's adventures in Ponyville.

Fixed the 4. Thanks for pointing it out and thanks for enjoying the story!

Thank you all as well. I managed to hit the filtered Featured Box from your likes, which I wasn't confidant would happen, given some of the stories in the box the last few days.


You also managed to hit the unfiltered featured box, so props to that.


“Umm… hi.” My eyes fell as I kicked at the ground. Oh, look, hooves. Yes, interesting. “My name is Nightingale and I’m a thestral. I love to drink my juice boxes.”

Oh look, I've found myself from middle school.

Damn. I say, I say, I am impressed!

Love the pacing, nothing feels too drawn out. The humor is fantastic (because of course Pinkie would make color-blind people see pink). I love the concept, simple idea with an amazing execution (It's a thestral kid going to school in Ponyville. What more do you need?)

10/10 I have to admit I am hooked!

This story is adorable! Do you plan on making a sequel?

Maybe? I might do a couple of one shots, maybe, but they'd be more to break up writing my bigger project dC/dt. Another possibility is I might make it my next big project -- making a big thestral story rather than a big changeling fic.

I would LOVE to see more, considering how much I love stories about cute Thestral fillies and mares! <3

A nice enjoyable treat, short and fun. This was a nice one, and well done!

I pointed to another pony in the back with a large bow. “Why can everypony else see ya like I can? Granny told me that the only ponies who can see thestrals are those who’ve seen ponies…” she hesitated, “...pass on.”

Holy shit that's dark.

“Alright, Diamond, I get it! She doesn’t drink blood!” Apple Bloom huffed.

“Eww! That tastes nasty! What’s in it?” She opened the door a smidge more to peer at the ingredients. “Contains beets, bees, and B Positive.

I'm not so sure about that, Applebloom. :unsuresweetie:
They're in for some fridge horror when they finally learn about blood type nomenclature. :twilightoops:


She wasnt gray. She wasnt gray! She wasnt gray!

so that must be how seeing a colour that doesn't exist must feel like.

This story gave me a random thought, in the episode "Every Little thing she does" when Twilight and Starlight are doing the teleport follow the leader thing they end up in a cave hanging from stalactites. Twilight has her wing folded around her like a bat, maybe Alicorns are part threstral too?

Preeeeetty sure that was a Harry Potter reference. As it turns out, the fancy magical self moving carriages are ACTUALLY pulled by some kind of nightmarish bat horses in those books. That can be seen only by people who watched other people die. Quite full of death for a children's book series, now that i think back about it... :rainbowhuh:

8461422 Yeah, I got the reference (read the Harry Potter books 8 times through) but that implies that AB saw somepony (her parents?) die, because she asks why other ponies can see Night.

Loved it. That was one of the most enjoyable 30 minutes of my life. :scootangel:

Add this to a growing list of stories that need sequels...

You seem to have a lot of misconceptions about bats and their sight. Take this summary for example:


The retinas of most mammals contain two types of photoreceptor cells, the cones for daylight vision and colour vision, and the more sensitive rods for night vision. Nocturnal bats were traditionally believed to possess only rods. Now scientists have discovered that nocturnal fruit bats (flying foxes) possess cones in addition to rods. Hence, fruit bats are also equipped for daylight vision.

You were modelling fruit bat so saying that they can't see color is completely misleading. Do they have limited colors with only two cones like dogs? I can't say.

As for can't standing the sun some bats can see just fine in sunlight even if they're nocturnal. Owls are fine too with daytime and they have some of the best nocturnal sight out there.

Overall a fun story. Just wish you didn't have to resort to artificially created conflict.

 “Contains beets, bees, and B Positive.”

Okay; I can see the benefits behind beetroot (I love beetroot) and bees, but what the hey is "B Positive"?

 “Mah question is: what the hay is B Positive?”
I shrugged. “No idea. I always assumed it was like the special sauce on Burger Princess hayburgers – some special ingredient that they can’t tell ponies about.”

Oh...OH...hopefully it's not a certain type of blood; from what I recall, there's two or three types of antigens or whatever the name is - A, B, and Rhesus. A person can have either A or B, both (AB) or neither (O). As for Rhesus, it can either be present (+) or absent (-).
So...B Positive...B+...huh.

I kind of have to dissent from the majority opinion. This is not a good story. It's a good piece of writing, and it's a great opening chapter, but it's not a good story, because in a story, you have a beginning, a middle, and an ending. You've got a beginning, and a whole lot of setup, but it doesn't go anywhere and it doesn't do anything. It's a story hook, not a story. Fun read, though.

That was pretty good. Really enjoyed it, excellent writing.

Perhaps before you start criticizing others work, try displaying some of your own? What makes you qualified to offer such criticism?

I massaged my eyes with my frogs

I'm sorry, what? this is a very confusing term.

This was cute, I would kind of like to a more extended version of the story now.

Frogs are the soft protrusions on the underside of either of a horse's hoof, basically like a toe of sorts.

I just double checked that on dictionary.com, and it looks like you're right. Still confusing, mostly because many of us have learned to associate the word with a certain amphibian family.

I would like to see a bit more of this it was adorable .

Uh... I'm not gonna disagree with the misconceptions part, but what makes you say fruit bat? Their primary source of nutrition in here is insects. I made it so they can eat fruits, vegetables, and other pony foods because they are ponies, but they don't get the same nutritional value from them. Said foods are simply flavor to them.

Regardless, the reason I went with colorblind was less my misconceptions about bats and more from the fact that I was mish-mashing DnD racial ideas together. In DnD Dark Vision is described as being black and white, and I've always wondered what that'd be like. It was the same for the Light Sensitivity.

I'm not disagreeing, because from a certain perspective you're right, but -- from a different perspective -- pure Slice of Life doesn't always follow the rules of conflict resolution. It's a genre that can afford to be a simple vignette. That said, I'm pretty sure the way I write is predisposed to favor long drawn out stories. I tend to set up a lot of little things without thinking about it, and that can lend to some good continuity in longer stories, but it's arguably a weakness when it comes to short stories, because it leaves certain things unresolved.

What LegionOfPony said. It's by far one of my favorite terms to use in pony fics. I mean, at the very least it's comedy gold for Pinkie who can have a Pinkie Sense of "My frogs are hopping! My frogs are hopping!"

8461794 You don't have to be a chef to say whether a meal tastes good or bad. Likewise, you don't have to be an author to say whether a story is good or bad. Or whether the text falls under the definition of a story, in this case.

He's given his reasons, so bringing up counterarguments would be far more productive than simply attacking his credentials. This ain't rocket science. :twilightsheepish:

Yeah, I agree with you; to a degree. But let's just agree to disagree. :pinkiehappy:

I love your interpretation of thestrals. Honestly, the colorblindness thing hasn't been something I've seen. My only complaint is that the ending feels abrupt... It feels like this is the first chapter for a much larger story. I hope to see more of this!

I really enjoyed this story. I'd love to see more.

Pinkie Pie is still pink to colourblind people?

Does that make her 'Pink' instead of 'pink'?

Dude... great story, but there's one thing that's wrong with it. WHY THE HELL IS IT MARKED AS COMPLETE OMFG WE NEED MORE NIGHTINGALE! :heart:

What do I have to do to get more Nightingale adorableness? This was so coooooot, and it had a very interesting take on bat ponies. I liked this one so much I had to blog it lol.

Damn, I was going to drop a 'nice first chapter, why is it marked complete' on you, but it looks like The Abyss got there before me. :ajbemused:


To quote The Abyss

great story, but there's one thing that's wrong with it. WHY THE HELL IS IT MARKED AS COMPLETE OMFG WE NEED MORE NIGHTINGALE! :heart:

That was excellent! I did like the bit about Granny Smith. It opens up a whole realm of possibilities regarding just how rare Thestrals are in the verse. Or were.

Wouldn't mind seeing more of this.
Nightingale was adorable. :heart:

Like griffons, they can’t get much nutritional value from the foods we eat.

Surely they can. If we talk about proteins then beans, nuts, peas, sunflower seeds. It's what I can remember right now.
There is other source of proteins and microelements besides meat, fish or bugs.

Different animals need different kinds of proteins and nutrients. That's why there's the difference between herbivores, omnivores, and carnivores in the first place. The point isn't that they can't neccesarrily live on other food, but that it's unhealthy for them.

For almost any proteins or nutrients there a lot of different sources. I know a guy who put his cat on a vegetarian diet. And this cat lives for sixteen years. Yes, IIRC he also gives a cat some sort of mineral tablets but in general, it mostly eats all sorts of veggies instead of meat or fish.
In general, I just want to point that they can get proteins and stuff from other sources besides, say, bugs.

10000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000/10 :heart::heart::heart::heart::heart:

Nah, man. Cats are obligate carnivores. Period. There is a reason they don't sustain on plants in the wild. There is a reason cats don't have flat teeth. Their bodies are built to process meat and only meat. If an animal needs supplements in its diet, that's a big sign that diet isn't cutting it. (Really, even regular kibble cat food isn't good for cats either since it's mostly grains) Is it possible for a cat to live on a vegetarian (or god-forbid vegan) diet? Technically. I mean, a human CAN live on cardboard, water, and pixie sticks. Doesn't mean they should.

Likewise, no zookeeper in their right mind would feed a lion or an eagle a vegetarian diet if they wanted to keep their job. Since a griffon's a lion/eagle hybrid, I can only assume they're carnivores too, though likely not obligates since they're apparently fine eating cakes and junk.


There is a reason they don't sustain on plants in the wild. There is a reason cats don't have flat teeth. Their bodies are built to process meat and only meat.

If we talking about a raw vegetable? Yes, sure. Cat's liver cant efficiently process it. But we talking about cooked ones. They are easier to ingest. And yes, it's a very strange way to feed a cat, IMO.
And again, the whole point that meat or fish (or bugs) not an only one source of proteins. That all. Although I doubt that thestrals are strictly carnivorous. Omnivores - yes, it's possible.

PS. And I'm not sure that thestrals even exit in canon :).

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