• Member Since 17th Mar, 2013

JBL


I have been known to put a jabroni or two through a table.

😒
Good 147 stories
  • Good 147 stories - 0 unread chapters
    Created by JBL
    - November, 2014
Found 139 stories in 115ms

Total Words: 6,826,860
Estimated Reading: 2 weeks

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T

This story is a sequel to Too Many Shining Armors (are Terrible Dads)


Finger Food's life is going pretty well. She's disguising herself well enough that nopony recognizes her as an evil clone of Pinkie Pie from the Mirror Pool. And she's renting an apartment and living with her super-fun husband Puzzle Box, and she's studying at university for a Bachelors in Philosophy.

And she's working on her evil plans to become immortal and have fun for all eternity, while making sure to keep hiding from everypony in Equestria, including Twilight and her friends and extended family.

But one day, long after she graduates and Princess Twilight became the ruler of all Equestria, her Finger Food Sense tells her that there will be a horrible disaster starting in Ponyville that will affect everycreature in Equis, including her, so she takes a break from her evil plans to stop it, by any means necessary.

This story tells the events of its prequel Too Many Shining Armors (are Terrible Dads) from Finger Food's much more serious first person perspective.

The Human tag: All characters are quadrupedal ponies. This story has brief discussions of the Equestrian's government's advice for what to do if a human or other unknown creature is encountered, and there is only the single human that also appeared in the prequel making a brief appearance with no speaking lines in the body of a pony (with no speaking lines) (in the body of a pony makes a brief appearance with no speaking lines)

This is a (withdrawn) submission to the Shining Armor is a Terrible Dad Competition, containing an evil Pinkie Pie clone's perspective and thoughts about Shining Armor being a terrible dad, mostly in the last three chapters.


A/N: The death tag: Actual deaths are limited to at least one clone getting sent to the Mirror Pool. Hypothetical deaths include an evil clone inappropriately and elaborately describing their reaction to the Trolley problem, a series of thought experiments in ethics and psychology, involving stylized ethical dilemmas of whether to sacrifice one person to save a larger number.

Themes of death also include: Fear of death/extinction. The death tag is also there for themes of ponies (other than alicorns) being mortal. It's also there for uses of the spell that send clones to the Mirror Pool, as perceived by Finger Food. This is a dark tragedy for the main character. The spell usage is similar to events in Too Many Pinkie Pies (Season 3, Episode 3), and that episode is rated TV-Y (suitable for all ages).

Other miscellaneous tags

  • The Dark Forest Hypothesis as a story theme (simplified version: characters that shoot and ask questions later, or hide as well as they can to avoid getting shot)
  • Not a crossover, but this story has a few jokes about Undertale
Chapters (7)
T

This story is a sequel to The Blueblood Papers: Bound By Blood


The Heartlands Campaign has reached a stalemate, and the Guards Division pauses to lick its wounds and prepare for the next offensive. While on leave, Prince Blueblood meets his hero, A. K. Yearling, and is dragged into a Daring Do story he would much rather have read.


Proofread and edited by Setokaiva

Chapters (4)
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Conflict has been boiling between the two Apple siblings for a while now, but when the trouble between them seems to reach it’s climax, an unexpected twist leaves them back at square one. Big Macintosh, the hardworking backbone of Sweet Apple Acres, claims he isn’t Big Mac. He denies being himself, and denies being the big brother to Applejack.

At an impasse on what to do, Ponyville’s local psychiatrist is called to help find out what happened to Big Macintosh. Can she find out what is going on with him? Whatever the truth is, the mind inside of Big Macintosh makes one thing perfectly clear. “I Am Not Big Mac.”

Content Warnings: Discussion of Death, Loss, Grief. Explicit Language.

WARNING: Spoilers in the comments.

Chapters (10)
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Hi. My name's James. If you're reading this, then one of two things have happened. One, you're another human that got sent to this shit hole and was able to find my shelter. Or two, you're one of the ponies that found me and I'm probably rotting in a cell or getting experimented on. If the former, good luck. If the later, go fuck yourself.

Chapters (1)
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There had never been six greater ponies. There had never been six greater friends. Their lives took them many places, but not always together. They came together in the end though. Not even death could keep them apart for long.

Featured 1/21/23 - 1/24/23

Chapters (1)
T

3/14/24 Still Alive Edition

There's only one pony in Ponyville that the Mane Six have never met. Pinkie Pie has never thrown him a party, Applejack has never sold him a mug of cider, and Twilight has never seen him check out any books. And as far as that unicorn, Lapis Print, is concerned, that's exactly how it should be.

Lapis can't risk them knowing where he lives, what he does for a living, or even what his name is - if he gets his way, the Mane Six won't even know he exists, and nopony in Ponyville will miss him once he's gone.

It should be a piece of cake - after all, it's not like the biggest magical power in Equestria is about making sure everypony looks out for each other, right?

(Rated Teen for language - mental cursing mostly.)

Chapters (19)
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This story is a sequel to Changing Expectations


When ages are segmented and divided in the annals of history, it is done so with great events as breakpoints. The Second Age of Heroes was unanimously declared to have started with the return of Princess Luna and the changeling Invasion of Canterlot.

For thousands of years, the changelings survived beneath The Great Tapestry, that which connects all living and nonliving things. Hundreds of generations worked endlessly to keep their existence a secret. With one command from Queen Chrysalis, the Masquerade was broken.

In a single night, the changelings waged war against Equestria and took the Kingdom by storm. Months later, the war between changelings and ponies has ended. A new tapestry, a new story, must be woven between the two species. Equestria and the Fifth Hive have gone through a dark chapter and have emerged stronger for it.

One war ends and another begins.

As The Sword of Damocles hangs above the heads of the formerly-human King Phasma and his Equestrian counterparts, the forces of light must work on an ever-shortening window before war once again brings Hell to Equus. Dark powers grow in the places that the light does not reach, and they bring one irrefutable truth.

Epitaph is coming.


Cover art by Nixworld.

Special thanks to my pre-readers!

Chapters (31)
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Everypony knows Prince Blueblood is spoiled, foppish, and most critically, an ass. Nopony would ever take him to be a serious threat - merely a small obstacle to their plans.

That's by design, but that doesn't mean Blueblood is happy about it.


A side story to my Four Princesses, Four Demons series, which began with Cadance the Unbroken. Readers of that series will notice a few connections, but this story is crafted to be enjoyed independently.


Featured from 7-26 to 7-29, peaking at #1. Thanks, everypony!

Chapters (1)
E
Source

A hidden museum rests in the Canterlot palace, by law open to the public, by practice closed to visitors. Within its walls lie treasures of opal and gemstones, salt and wood. Shelves filled with untouched scrolls line the walls.

It is here that Luna pays her respects to Equestria's fallen heroes. Why, then, is it against her sister's wishes?

Chapters (1)
E

Sweet Sauce was once a Stallion of renown and stature, a pony others respected and admired. Unfortunately for him, all that success eventually turned to pride, and ended with a sentence of banishment from Equestria.

There was no term to his sentence--but Sweet Sauce was not the kind of pony to surrender. He had centuries to reflect, to reconsider, and to gather power for his triumphant return. But perhaps he should've spent a little more time.

His incredible spell worked, returning him to the world of his birth. But instead of his own powerful body, he's now a small, useless earth pony, in a world that has forgotten he ever existed. Sweet is determined to make up for his mistakes, and to prove to the princesses of Equestria that he is a changed pony.

Too bad he looks like a homeless little colt without a cutie mark.


Updates Thursdays until complete. Editing by Two Bit and Sparktail. Coverart by Solder Point.

This story was written as a Patreon reward for Boopy Doopy.

Chapters (23)