The void was just as empty as the last time Gabriel stood in it. His head swiveled in every direction, but found nothing. The only thing inhabiting the empty white sea was himself.
“I fixed things up with your sister, mostly.” Gabriel said out into the expanse. He hoped that Big Macintosh could hear him somewhere in this place, but he couldn’t even hear his own echo. “We aren’t fighting anymore… we don’t really talk too much to each other, but at least when we do it isn’t to pick a fight.”
Gabriel let out a long sigh, unlike his words, the sigh carried out and echoed across the empty void. Almost as if to mock him. “She isn’t happy, Mac. She’s terrified. I can tell because you can tell. Applejack thinks you are really gone, maybe gone for good.”
“All you have to do is say something, anything!” Gabriel cried out, “Hell, just show that you’re here. Give me something to reassure her, to tell her that it will be okay. Don’t be such a goddamn coward and say something!”
“Anything, Mac! Applejack needs it. I need it! Please!”
The void had no answer.
I still had no work to do around the farm, and it was driving me mad. Applejack didn’t protest my attempt at grass cutting today, but Granny Smith was quick to put a stop to it. Granny was still convinced I needed to take a break from hard labor, and apparently believed Applejack needed the break today too. Both Applejack and I were forced to relax on an otherwise perfect day to get a job done.
The only job I was allowed to do was an apple delivery. With a bushel sized wicker basket tied to my back. It was a heavy load, but not nearly enough to break a sweat as Big Mac. A disappointment, but at least it was a job. Before I could leave to deliver it, I was stopped by Applejack. “Ah’m comin’ with.”
My eyebrow raised down at her. “Not the entire time, Gabe, ah’m headin’ ta Rainbow Dash’s. Need ta be in Ponyville to do that. Do ya know who Rainbow is?”
“Eeyup.”
The two of us walked begrudgingly away from Sweet Apple Acres. No matter our issues, we both didn’t like not working. It’s what made punishments like this so effective, and Granny knew it. “Ya gotta stop doin’ that when yer talkin to me.”
“Do what?”
“The eeyups and nnnopes.”
“They’re what come naturally here. Ah can’t really help it. It’d be hard to focus on not doin’ it.”
“It really makes ya sound like ‘im, and don’t say you ain’t him, ah already know that.”
“Sorry.”
“Nothin’ to be sorry fer.” Applejack snorts. “Apple Bloom an’ Granny ain’t gettin involved in this, right?”
“Eeyup.”
“Good,” She said, “Anypony else know except Dr. Dream Heart?”
“Nnnope.”
“Then if ah see ya in Ponyville, ya better not get on me about callin’ you Big Mac.”
“Ah won’t.”
“Good.”
Most of the walk to Ponyville was done in silence. I didn’t know what to say to Applejack, and I don’t think she knew what to say either. So we walked, like two strangers who happened to be walking at the same pace. It was just as we made it into Ponyville that Applejack spoke up again.
“You gonna visit the Doctor today?”
“Nnnope, not today.”
I was expecting her to protest against my refusal. Tell me that I should go back and talk to her more. It was honestly more suspicious that she merely nodded her head.
“Stay outta trouble, y’hear?”
“Eeyup.”
Applejack parted ways with me, notably not going in the direction of Rainbow Dash’s cloud house. I decided to leave my suspicions on the ground Applejack left from. It was weird she wasn’t pestering him, sure, but Applejack’s business was her own. Big Mac had a place in it, I didn’t.
A delivery still had to be done, and while it was painfully easy, it kept me occupied for at least a little bit. I took the longer way around to my destination, to try and stretch the work out as far as I could. Unfortunately, it was nearly a straight shot through Ponyville’s main street to get there. No good detours would let him avoid it.
Sugarcube Corner came into my view. The gigantic gingerbread shaped bakery was far too easy to spot, and far too easy to get to for my tastes. After this was done, I'd be left with nothing to do for the rest of my day… I wasn’t looking forward to it. I prayed that Mr. and Mrs. Cake would be the ones at the front of the bakery today. Big Mac’s conversations with them were always easier than when a certain cotton candy mare was behind the counter.
“Hey, Macky!!”
Prayers aren’t always answered.
“Howdy, Pinkie.” I said to the pink mare at the Sugarcube Corner counter. She was waving wildly for me to approach, and gasped when she saw the bushel of apples I had for her.
“Oh yes! Thank you thank you, Macky! I really really needed these apples. Here, have a cupcake!”
Before I could reply my mouth was stuffed with a cupcake. An Apple, Cinnamon and Vanilla cupcake. With a candy apple topping. I was about to be a complete idiot and politely decline this, but after having it in my mouth, I’m glad Pinkie violated my personal space to give it to me, because it was delicious.
I passed the bushel to Pinkie Pie while chewing on the cupcake. “What do ya need all these fer anyway?”
“All the decorating for the Summer Sun Celebration has been taking up so much of my time, I haven’t been able to bake any of the sweets for the day! Twenty three different recipes gotta be tried today, and they all gotta match up with the apple themed catering. I'm still waiting on Applejack to tell me what you guys are doing for the menu. Did she happen to tell you yet?”
The Summer Sun Celebration? According to Big Mac’s memory, that wasn’t for another two weeks. His family wouldn’t even start with the food prep until a week prior. It’s not like they had to order any apples, and Big Mac had already set up the supply chain of ingredients and supplies they’d need before he disappeared. Sweet Apple Acres would soon be starting work for that event, but they didn’t need to start as early as Pinkie Pie did, it seems.
“Nnnope. We got everythin’ we need, but no menu yet. Normally Granny’s the one who makes the menu ‘forehand.”
“Beforehand?” Pinkie asked curiously.
“Uh, ‘forehoof.”
“Ooooh! Okay! Well I know you and Applejack wouldn’t leave me hanging, I’ll just wait until you’re ready.” Pinkie Pie was about to walk into the back with the apples, but turned her head back to me at the last moment. “Are you busy at all, Macky?”
“Nnnope.”
“Do you wanna help me out by testing some of the recipes? There’s delicious cakes in it for you!”
Pinkie’s smile was inviting, almost too inviting. Big Macintosh could never get a read on what was going on inside that head of cotton candy, and that confusion passed on to me. Despite her constant gags and crazy demeanor, there was a clear intelligence in those eyes. As if they saw right through you. It’s what made me so nervous being around her compared to anybody else.
But she was offering work, and as labor starved as I was, that was like offering drugs to a crashing addict. “Ah’d love to help, whaddaya need?”
Pinkie Pie invited me into the kitchen, and to my great pleasure, we got to work.
Applejack did not, in fact, go to Rainbow Dash’s house. Dream Heart knew this for a fact, why? Because Applejack was in the hospital asking for her. Unfortunately, she caught her in one of the few moments she was called for a consultation. Thunderlane had gotten into a flight accident with the resident mail mare, and the staff wanted to make sure there was no mental damage from his rather severe head injury.
It ended up being nothing, but it was good to stretch her metaphorical muscles and act like a proper doctor now and then. Dream Heart was often seen as merely a therapist by the ponies in Ponyville, but she had learned how to practice medicine in the same schools the rest of the doctors had. Not that the doctors already working weren’t enough for this small town.
“Applejack’s waiting in your office,” Nurse Redheart said to Dream Heart when they both left Thunderlane’s room. “You’ve been pretty popular with the Apple siblings lately, any interesting gossip?”
“Nothing I can tell you, Reddy,” Dream replied.
“Too bad, lunch in the break room today?”
“Sure, did you bring any of those hay fries?”
“Yup, but I’m not sharing~.”
“You’re a tease.”
Redheart gave the narrow eyed Dream a wink before walking off to her next patient. She wasn’t sharing any of her salad either, Redheart would always pick at her tomatoes, but not today! The thoughts of her future meal would have to wait until Dream Heart took care of her own patient.
Applejack was back, and given Dream’s latest sessions with Gabriel, it didn’t come as a surprise. When she first saw Applejack she thought that the issue she would have to help her through was relationship troubles between siblings. Dream Heart’s guess was not wrong, but hardly accounted for the depth these troubles would be. Her small part in it so far lit a flame in her. Searching every patient case she could find, and finishing the textbooks and tomes that were borrowed from the library.
The Sleeping World was a particularly tough one for her to read again. It was by far one of the hardest ancient tomes for a modern day pony to read, but the insight into the pony mind and consciousness it gave was particularly informative. Especially when she compared it to the Big Macintosh case. It wasn’t enough to be certain, but Dream Heart believed she could help Gabriel after finishing that tome. At least she had an idea they could try.
Not that she could do any of it with Gabriel until he removed his ultimatum. Until such a time, relationship troubles were the only work she would do for them.
The door to her office opened with the creak of a hinge the maintenance colt said he’d fix weeks ago. Alerting the earth pony who waited within, sitting on the chaise lounge with a nervous demeanor. Dream had learned that Applejack gave away a lot of her emotions through more physical motions than most ponies. Ear flicks, shifting her hooves, rubbing her neck and upper legs, or fiddling with her hat. Each little movement told of how she felt at any moment. A trait she actually shared with Gabriel. The shared quirks between siblings, or former siblings in this case.
“Good morning, Applejack.” Dream Heart smiled and sat in her customary chair. “It is good to see you again.”
“Mornin’ Dr. Dream.” Applejack realized she was still wearing her hat indoors, and promptly took it off. Though she still held it within her hooves like a security blanket. “Should ah have made an appointment instead of just walkin’ in here?”
“Normally, but I’m not nearly busy enough to worry about it. You can come whenever you need.” The notebook and pen came without more than a thought. “How can I help you today?”
Applejack’s eyes shifted between the various decorations that lined Dream’s walls. Mostly clean, simple items for patients to idly look at while they talk, but she did have her doctorate diploma up next to her desk. Applejack eyed that one for a moment. Dream Heart couldn’t see any of that anger Applejack had pouring out of her from the last time they met.
She had come to ask a few days ago how her first session with Gabriel went. When the ultimatum was mentioned, Applejack had looked like a fiery demon about to unleash torment on poor Gabriel. Today she was void of fury and rage, only the emotions that had been hiding away for the past week were surfacing. Uncertainty, nervousness, confusion, grief.
“Normally… ah wouldn’t think ta come to you to deal with somethin’ like this,” Applejack began, “Me and Mac fought all the time, it wasn’t anythin’ unusual, but ah can’t exactly tell… ‘Gabriel’ ta come and see you without doin’ it myself too.”
“I see you started using the name Gabriel to refer to him.”
“Not like ah have much of a choice. He uses every chance he gets ta remind me.”
“Is that what you are here for today?”
“…” Her lips pursed, and Dream caught the tightening grip she gave the hat in her grasp. Not anger… fear? “Ah don’t know what to do with him, how ta talk to him. Ah need somepony who knows what he is now ta help me… understand it ah guess.”
Relationship troubles, but Dream Heart saw progress in Applejack before they had even started. Just a day before she and Gabriel were at the breaking point, now the farm mare was willing to talk about it without frustration. It was progress, but that wouldn’t make the conversation they were about to have any easier.
“We’ll do just that, then.” Dream settled in for what would probably be a longer conversation. She’ll have to apologize to Redheart later, their lunch date would have to be postponed. “I believe it would help both of us if we started from the beginning. Before Gabriel. You told me before that you and Big Macintosh had gotten into a large fight.”
“Yeah, we’d been havin’ a disagreement about the new planting’s we’d been plannin’ on this year. Mac wanted to plant the same apples we use fer cider again so that we’d have more apples to work with in future cider seasons. Ah wanted to plant a new variety of apple that we don’t have ta offer. We’d been bickerin’ back and forth about it until Granny told us ta plead our case and let her decide. In the end, she chose my idea… Big Mac wasn’t happy.”
“That is what started the argument?”
“Yup… Ah’ll admit, ah gloated about it a lil bit, but ah never expected him to take it so poorly. He was more furious than ah think I’d ever seen him be. Mac kept sayin’ things that didn’t make no sense ta me. How ah’d been cuttin’ him out of the farm, takin his part in it away from him. Ah yelled back how stupid he was fer thinkin that over some new growth…”
Her ears fell back on her head. Fear and nervousness were taking over. “Mac then said ta me that ah had no place leadin’ the farm, and… and in the heat of the moment ah said that he had no place bein’ my brother.”
Dream Heart was about to ask a question about that, but Applejack continued before her mouth finished opening. “Ah know that it was wrong to say! Ah felt awful after sayin’ it, and the way Mac looked at me, he was hurt. Ah tried to apologize again and again, but he locked himself in his room after that… Ah wouldn’t see him come out until the next afternoon.”
“And that is when Gabriel came out instead?”
“…eeyup.”
Applejack was in the house after lunch. Cleaning up the table while Apple Bloom went off to play with her friend Twist and Granny Smith was enjoying a walk around the orchard. Big Macintosh hadn’t come out from his room for breakfast or lunch, and Applejack couldn’t help but feel like it was her fault.
Mac was being an ass last night, but what she had said to him was far worse. Not a single word of that sentence was something she meant. She just wanted to get back at him, to make him feel as bad as he was making her. Why that came out of her mouth rather than anything else? Applejack would never know, but she would regret it.
Applejack caught the sounds of an opening door and heavy hoof falls. She turned off the sink and looked towards the staircase. Where the large red form of Big Macintosh was lumbering down.
“Hey, Mac.” She said quietly. What Big Macintosh’s mood would be today was still a mystery. Applejack didn’t want to make things worse between them if she could help it. She was already the last pony he wanted to see right now, or at least that is what she thought.
Big Macintosh didn’t reply to her. He didn’t look angry or annoyed. Unsure was the best word to describe his expression towards her. “Look, Mac,” Applejack continued, “what ah said last night. It was wrong o’ me to do, really wrong. Ah never should have said that to you. Ah am really, really sorry. Can ya forgive me?”
She waited for his response. Mac opened his mouth multiple times, closing it soon after each time. Until the word that came out of him was as simple and clear as Big Macintosh language could be. “Eeyup..”
That would have been the end of the conversation. Big Macintosh was already turning to leave, but stopped just before exiting the kitchen doorway. Whatever Big Mac had been unsure about, he finally had made his decision, and turned back around. “Applejack, ah need to tell somethin’ to ya, and it’s important.”
“Of course, Mac, what is it?” She said, leaning against the counter, front legs crossed.
“…There ain’t no easy way of sayin’ this. Ah am not Big Mac.”
“…What?”
“Mah name ain’t Big Macintosh. My name is Gabriel…. Ah don’t know how this happened, but ah woke up earlier today as yer brother.”
What was she hearing? Nonsense, certainly. Applejack snorted in amusement, and shook her head. Maybe Mac wasn’t as angry after all if he could make this up. “Alright, that one’s pretty good. Ah didn’t know you were a griffin now, Mac.”
“What?” Big Mac looked at her with genuine confusion. “No, that is my name, and ah wasn’t a griffin. Ah’m- Well Ah’m not supposed to be here. My first thought was that this was some freaky, pastel dream ah was havin, but ah can’t seem to wake up from it. Somethin’ happened, and now ah’m inhabiting Big Mac’s body and mind.”
Applejack was waiting for the punchline. Her barely contained grin was ready to blow and make fun of him for this goofy display. Big Mac noticed. His very serious expression narrowed at her.
“Applejack, ah need you to take this seriously. Somethin’ bad has happened ta Big Mac, and-.”
“Yeah, yeah, and then the ghost possessed you and all. Ah get it.”
“Ah don’t think you do. Ah really mean it, we need to find yer brother, Applejack.”
“What ah think is that mah brother is havin’ a bit too much fun after my apologizing. It’s okay though, ah deserve it a bit.”
“Ah’m not yer brother, Applejack, that’s the point! This ain’t no joke!”
He said it, just in that moment. He said those words. Applejack heard everything Big Mac had said, but had come to her own conclusion. Her eyes narrowed, leaning towards her brother. “That’s what this is, ain’t it? Ya want to get back at me fer what ah said, huh? Well yer right, it ain’t no joke and it sure as hell is pissin me off now, Mac.”
“Please, Applejack, ah need you ta believe me, ah don’t want to be in this situation either.”
“Then don’t be, stop playin’ around, Big Mac. Ah mean it.”
“Ah’m not Big Mac!” The stallion that was once called Big Mac yelled at her. His booming voice shook the room around them, and startled even Applejack. “Ah’m not him, and ah need you ta see that! Please, this ain’t my home, and yer not my sister, ah’m not supposed ta be here and ah need somebody’s help ta fix it!”
Her heart sank inside her chest. The stallion’s plea for help was lost in her ears while a single phrase played on repeat inside of her head. She wasn’t his sister. The stupid thing Applejack had said to him was now being made into reality, by the single most important stallion in her life.
It didn’t matter if this was a mean joke or not. Big Macintosh had crossed a line. “Ah can’t believe yer really doin’ this, Mac.”
“Applejack, please, ah-“
“Why would you say that to me, Mac?!” She cried out, “Ah don’t care how mad ya are at me or how many times you damn well say it, you are my brother! No fight is gonna change that!”
The former Big Macintosh continued to call to her, but she refused to answer. Galloping out of the house and into the farm.
“I can imagine it was hard for you at that moment to even consider that he was telling the truth.” Dream Heart now had another nearly full series of notes after listening to Applejack’s story. She would need a binder to hold all of these soon enough, maybe make her own book and call it the Applejack/Gabriel Therapy Review.
“Anger was about the only thing ah was thinkin’ of, then… and fer the next few days.”
“Did any more arguments happen after your initial fight with him?”
“Uh-huh, mostly from me… Ah’d call him Big Mac, he’d try and correct me, you can guess the rest.”
“You were under the belief that this was all some awful joke he was doing to spite you, then?”
“That was it, basically. If he was gonna be this awful ta me, I’d refuse to accept it.”
“But that isn’t entirely true, is it?”
Applejack had laid back on the couch in the time of their discussion, her head mostly pointed towards the ceiling. Dream Heart’s question finally got her to turn her head back. “Whaddaya mean by that?”
“You came to me, and admitted that you thought there could be a chance when you talked with me.”
Her ear flicked, she was about to protest, Dream thought. “No, ah still didn’t believe ‘em, but ah was gettin sick of our back and forth. Ah figured that if you were able to tell that he’s lyin, ah could get this whole mess ta end, or maybe force him to settle our problems… It was only after ah heard the ultimatum that a part o’ me started to believe it.”
“I don’t think that’s entirely true either, Applejack.”
She was flicking her ear again, but held her tongue. Dream Heart continued uninterrupted. “I said something to you when you first came to visit me about Gabriel. On that day I mentioned that this new individual inside Mac may be more receptive to being convinced. You had a particular reaction to that, Applejack.
Applejack remembered the interaction too. Dream Heart saw no defiant ear flicks this time. “… Maybe ah had some doubts, but ah didn’t give ‘em the time o’ day to think about.”
“And why’s that?”
“While Big Mac-… Gabriel and ah were fightin, we still had ta plant all the new seeds. He wasn’t helpin’ out on this part of the farm, instead he was doin’ quite literally every backed up job we had to do around Sweet Apple Acres. That left me ta do all the seedin. Ah worked until ah was tired enough ta not think about it.”
Dream made a note of that particular line. “But you had to stop working eventually, does it take four days to plant the seeds?”
“No, ah finished in two… but ah also occupied myself with a few other tasks ta keep me busy.”
“You two aren’t that different, after all.” Dream Heart said with a smile,
“What?”
“Applejack, you worked until you couldn’t think straight anymore. I have to say that you two do a remarkable job of avoiding your troubles by being productive.”
Applejack was about to protest again, instead of fighting back from the clear truth, she scrunched up her face and nodded. Ever the honest mare. “…Yeah, yer not wrong. It’s just what workin’ ponies do, we work.”
Dream Heart was about to continue with another question, but she caught a movement that made her hold her tongue. Applejack was taking a slow, deep breath. Was that just acceptance of what was just said, or was she about to say something?
“Dr. Dream… ah need you to be straight with me… Is it mah fault Big Mac became Gabriel?”
She guessed correctly, it was something she was about to say, but it was a question so far out of left field that Dream Heart was at a loss on what to say. A question, a question to give her time. “What do you mean, Applejack?”
“What ah said ta him, about him not deservin’ to be my brother! What if that caused somethin’ to happen, made him do something that made Gabriel appear?!” Her voice was raised, the time between breaths in her chest was shorter. The fear that Dream had noticed in Applejack since the beginning of their session, this was the source of it. “If ah hadn’t of said that. If ah had kept my dumb mouth shut, would ah still have my brother right now?!”
“Applejack.” Dream spoke in a stern, but soft tone, commanding the panicking mare’s attention. “I want you to count with me. Repeat after me.”
“One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.”
“One, t-two, three, four, f-five… six, seven, eight, nine, ten.”
Applejack was able to take in a clear, deep breath after she finished counting. It wasn’t enough to get rid of her fears, but it calmed her down enough for her to listen.
“It is easy for us to find dots to connect when something goes wrong. Find things or ponies to blame, even ourselves. Correlation doesn't equal Causation, Applejack. No matter how it looks or feels, this is not your fault.”
“But how can ya be sure of that?”
“If I had reason to believe that your actions that night caused what happened to Gabriel, I would tell you, Applejack. Even after hearing your side, I do not think that it was your fault.”
“Ah…” Her breath hitched, and tears streamed down her orange fur. “Ah don’t know what ta do… He-He’s gone, but ah see him every day. Walkin, and talkin, and actin just like ‘im… But it’s somepony else.”
“He’s still mah brother, even if he’s Gabriel… ah can’t just stop treatin’ ‘im like… like…” Applejack sat up from the chair, and the tears were free to flow down her cheeks. She sobbed openly and loudly. A much needed release of the pent up emotions she had been holding onto.
A crying patient was a delicate balance for Dream Heart to manage. Sometimes, a pony needed to cry, and denying them that would hurt more than the pain they felt in the moment. How a pony cries, however, was different. Ponies were once herd animals, and sought safety with others. When a pony is at the breaking point, and needs to let it out, they can often feel safest to do so when given a shoulder to cry on.
The key was knowing when to offer it. Dream Heart moved to sit next to Applejack, and within moments they were locked in a tight embrace. Applejack’s tears were soaked by the fur on Dream’s chest, and Dream’s hooves gently brushed through Applejack’s blonde mane. She gently spoke to her as she cried. Telling her that it was okay, to let it go, she would be alright here, and everything would become better.
When Applejack’s tears dried up and the only sounds she made were hiccups, Dream still held on. She waited until Applejack moved to release her. Allowing her to keep the embrace for as long as she needed it.
“…Thank you, Doctor.”
Dream smiled, and finally their embrace was released. She lingered for a moment, just in case, but when it was clear that Applejack had got it all out of her system, she returned to her own seat.
“…How do ah do it? How do ah see him as just Gabriel?”
“For that, I think you need to get to know Gabriel.” Dream replied, “Learn who he is, and by doing so, it will be easier to separate what you see from what you know.”
“…Ah get what ya mean… Do ya think that there is a chance Big Mac is still in there? That he’ll come back?”
“Anything can happen, and Gabriel certainly believes it. I would not give up all hope, Applejack. Do you believe in Big Macintosh?”
Another long, deep breath from the farm mare, before a newfound resolve came to Applejack’s eyes. “Ah sure do.”
Twenty three different apple themed cupcake recipes were baked, and twenty three different cupcakes were taste tested. Not only by Pinkie Pie and myself, but also the owners of Sugarcube Corner, Mr. And Mrs. Cake, when they returned from a morning date. Eventually, one particular cupcake was picked as the winner for the Summer Sun Celebration. The Apple Cinnamon Vanilla cupcake that Pinkie had first stuffed in my mouth.
My time in the Sugarcube Corner didn’t end there, however. Between different cupcake prep and taste testing, I asked if I could help out anywhere else. Broken door hinges were repaired, air ducts cleaned, the sink’s plumbing fixed, and two different lights replaced. The Cakes had tried to offer me bits for all that I did, but I told them there was no need. I had nothing else to do that day anyways, and the fact I could work at all was payment enough. By the time everything was completed, it was already close to dinner time.
“Thank you for all your help today!” Pinkie Pie said at the doorway to Sugarcube Corner. “I’d almost say it was too much help.”
“Ain’t no such thing,” I said with a smile, “thank ya fer havin’ me.”
Before I could walk away, Pinkie Pie caught my attention again by appearing right in front of me. “Are you unhappy, Macky?”
“…why’re you askin, Pinkie?”
“Your face, you look sad,” Pinkie said, “You looked sad earlier, so I thought it’d make you happy to taste some cupcakes! Then you did all that work too, and you didn’t look sad… but you didn’t look happy either, and now that you’re leaving, you look sad again.”
Pinkie Pie puffed up her cheeks. “I don’t like seeing my friends sad.”
After an entire day of being around her manic and goofy energy, I almost forgot that Pinkie Pie was probably the most perceptive pony in Ponyville. She didn’t have the eye for detail that the owner of Carousel Boutique did, or the tact Applejack had, but she could always tell when someone needed a smile on their face.
“It’s nothin’ to worry about, Pinkie. Just… had a lot on my mind, lately. Today felt good, ya did make me smile.”
“That was a courtesy smile, not a real smile! You haven’t done a real smile in weeks.”
Weeks? Even looking back at Big Mac’s memories, I had no idea what Pinkie was talking about. Big Macintosh looked happy at other moments, when he wasn’t fighting with Applejack. Unless… Pinkie Pie could tell there was something off about him before I came here.
“Ah’m sorry, Pinkie.”
“Is there anything I can do to help? I could get the party cannon!”
“Ah think you should save that fer another time. It ain’t really somethin you can solve, ah just need time with it.”
This answer didn’t seem to satisfy Pinkie, but she did accept it. “Well don’t do what you did today then.”
“Whaddaya mean?”
“The working! You’re overworking yourself, when you have sad thoughts holding you down, you gotta let them go through you! No holding them back or putting them off!”
Damn, she’s good.
“Alright, Pinkie. Ah won’t.”
Pinkie Pie smiled, and hugged me tight. “See ya later Macky! I hope you can smile soon! If you don’t, I’m coming for you!”
I knew she meant it in a good way, but I couldn’t help but feel threatened. Either way, she wasn’t going to press it now, so I took my chance and got out of there.
Applejack had gotten home before I did. We didn’t talk, which was pretty normal, but sat next to each other at the dinner table. This wasn’t a choice by either of us, since Granny Smith had all three of us sit on one side of the table while she sat at the other end.
“Is somethin’ wrong, Granny?” Apple Bloom asked from next to me. We all knew that we sat like this when Granny had something important to say.
“Family, ah assume ya all remember that we got the caterin’ to do fer the Summer Sun Celebration soon.”
We all nodded.
“And cuz of that, we were gonna be missin’ the annual Apple Family Reunion.”
We all also noted the use of the word ‘were’ in that sentence.
“Has somethin’ changed, Granny?” Applejack asked.
“Why yes, Applejack. The other members of the family heard about what’s happenin, and they decided ta do the Family Reunion here in Ponyville instead!”
The three Apple siblings collectively said, “What?!”
“Now now don’t start freakin’ out on me. Most o’ the family wanted ta come to the Summer Sun Celebration too, so we’re plannin’ to do the Reunion on the day before, and then everypony will be helpin out with the caterin’ fer the Celebration. We got a lot o’ extra hooves now to help us out with this event!”
“Does that mean ah gotta share my room again with mah cousins?” Apple Bloom asked.
“All the fillies, foals and their mommas are gonna get the rooms while they’re here. Rest o’ us will use the tents the family’s bringin, but there’s still a lot of work ta do, an’ ah need to know if we’re gonna be havin’ anymore trouble before the family gets here.”
Granny’s gaze shifted between me and Applejack. “Are you two still goin’ at it over the seeds? Cuz if ya are we’re gonna get this sorted out right this instant!”
“…We aren’t, Granny. Mac and ah are okay.” Applejack glanced in my direction, her gaze caught my own glance at her.
“Eeyup.”
“And ah ain’t gonna here about this again? You both are important pieces ta make sure these two events go swimmingly. It’s why ah wanted ya both to take a break today and get yer heads cooled off, ah need ta know that you can work together!”
Applejack hesitated to answer, and I couldn’t exactly blame her. Everything that’s led up to this has put her and Big Mac at odds, which didn’t change when I came into the picture. We had one day where things weren’t bad, but would they continue like that?
“We’ll be okay.” I said to Granny, who looked surprised at my sudden resolve. She tried to see right through me, her aged wisdom discerning whether I was just saying what she wanted to hear. She found nothing, since I meant every word that I said. Applejack looked just as surprised to hear me say that, but her own resolve joined with mine, and she nodded her head.
“…Promise me, both of yous.”
“Ah Promise.”
“Ah Promise.”
“Nuh uh.” Granny shook her head. “Ah wanna hear that promise yer Pinkie friend does. That way ah know ya meant it.”
No matter how much resolve you have, there was no way to not hesitate when somebody asks you to do a Pinkie Promise. We cast glances at each other again, as if waiting for the other person to speak up. At least I thought we were, but Applejack was the first to speak up this time.
“Cross mah heart, hope ta fly, stick a cupcake in mah eye.”
Applejack had come to a decision… and a part of me deep down appreciated her for it. It meant more than just appeasing Granny, it was Applejack confirming to me that she wasn’t going to fight with me anymore. No more calling me the wrong name in private, no more doubting my existence.
I felt a tug at my heart, and knew what I had to say. “Cross mah heart, hope ta fly, stick a cupcake in mah eye.”
When we both finished the motions of the promise. The joyful giggles of Pinkie Pie echoed in the distance. Their pacts had been sealed. With the contracts signed, Granny Smith nodded in satisfaction, and dinner was served.
It was after everything was cleaned up from dessert and dinner that Applejack approached me one last time for the night. “Gabe, are ya gonna be ready fer this?”
“Whaddaya mean?”
“The Family’s comin. Dozens of ponies, from all across Equestria, and all of em have met Big Mac before. Are ya sure you wanna keep up the act?”
I nodded my head. “Ah’m not about to ruin Mac’s life by freakin’ out his family, if ah can avoid it.”
“Alright… Any progress today?”
I worked to avoid all of it. “Nnnope.”
Applejack sighed, “Figures… don’t you give up, got it?”
“Ah wouldn’t dream if it.”
For once, we were in agreement, but with the looming Family Reunion and the Summer Sun Celebration, I knew I was running out of time. If Apple Bloom and Pinkie Pie could tell how much was wrong with Big Mac right now, then no doubt that the extended family could spot me as an imposter in his body soon enough too.
I had to find him, and soon… Even if it meant forgoing rules I put in place, I knew where I had to go tomorrow. Dr. Dream Heart was who Applejack led me to, and I would trust her choice and see if the psychiatrist can doing anything to find Big Mac.
Tomorrow, I would start my sessions with Dream Heart.