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Stories about ponies are stories about people. Every challenge is an opportunity to change. My Patrons let me keep writing, at: https://www.patreon.com/RealStarscribe

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Sweet Sauce was once a Stallion of renown and stature, a pony others respected and admired. Unfortunately for him, all that success eventually turned to pride, and ended with a sentence of banishment from Equestria.

There was no term to his sentence--but Sweet Sauce was not the kind of pony to surrender. He had centuries to reflect, to reconsider, and to gather power for his triumphant return. But perhaps he should've spent a little more time.

His incredible spell worked, returning him to the world of his birth. But instead of his own powerful body, he's now a small, useless earth pony, in a world that has forgotten he ever existed. Sweet is determined to make up for his mistakes, and to prove to the princesses of Equestria that he is a changed pony.

Too bad he looks like a homeless little colt without a cutie mark.


Updates Thursdays until complete. Editing by Two Bit and Sparktail. Coverart by Solder Point.

This story was written as a Patreon reward for Boopy Doopy.

Chapters (23)
Comments ( 485 )

always nice to see another story with dinky and/or pip

Thank you very much for this!

interesting start, i take it he another one of celestia failures

Oh, this is going to be a lot of fun. Sweet is a blend of self-aware, self-important, and self-oblivious that would be a lot more irritating if he could back up any of it. As is, he’s teaming up with Best Filly. Eagerly looking forward to seeing this journey unfold.

11246284
he probably get along with blueblood

I think I can see how this guy got himself banished. This looks like it'll be a hoot and a half. I'm looking forward to it.

RTC

He could imagine no pony from one end of Equestria to the other guilty of sin great enough to be banished to New Mexico.

Reading this while on break, my coworkers looked at me funny when I suddenly burst out laughing.

11246332
reminds me of a silly comic strip where Rarity got revenge on Rainbow Dash (for being left behind at the end of "the last roundup") by sending her to Hollywood...
AND sent Scootaloo and Derpy to keep her company! (because Dash had stuck her with Pinkie)

George Lucas.
Alfred Hitchcock.
Steven Spielberg.
Starscribe.

We need to discuss the movie rights. CharlieHorse@Netflix.com

Stupendous!

11246294
Yeah, that third time victory at the Harmony Soufflé tournament cost him big time.

Oh man. Dis gon' be gud. :trollestia:

But I’m not in New Mexico anymore. I’ve already won, even if I get eaten by a Grue.

You won't get me, you eldritch... something! :flutterrage:

Ya know... He should thank his lucky stars he wasn't sent to Iowa.... Or Ohio.... Shudder. Nightmares of boredom unparalleled.

This has potential!

uh oh! but i like how you showed the industrial change of Equestria, it is trully remarkable how magic ad technology is combined here

It has been implied that Sweet Sauce used to be an alicorn. It also sounds like he had multiple sisters, with whom he was growing up/an adult during the time of Starswirl the Bearded.
It almost sounds like he was Celestia and Luna's brother.

Starswirl never agreed to a proper wizard’s duel, so perhaps we’ll never know.

”What makes it proper?”
“Me winning, of course.”

I was beginning to think that Equestria had stagnated completely since my departure.

”What with the crystalline castle with the truly ludicrous number of books left for public consumption.”

It was looking more and more like his return home wouldn’t even require him to sacrifice his convenience after all. Now if only he could find someone making modern music, he’d be basically set.

Ah, that’s why Vinyl’s tagged.

And Sweet hopefully learns the importance of believing local sources. A lot of time’s gone by. More has changed than he realizes. Now to see how he lives to regret it. (Of course he’ll make it out; this would be awfully short otherwise.)

11246986
That's what I got from it too,

Also, he was on Earth long enough to internalize a lot of modern references, like Twitter and Zork, although it's unclear exactly how long he was there and what the time difference is between Earth and Equestria. I doubt he was gone for 1000+ years on his end. (Note that his banishment predates both Nightmare Moon and Sombra)

Why is he named sweet sauce tho? all mlp names are thematic to some extend how does it relate to him?
kinda funny tho. an alicorn named Sweet sauce.

11247034
maybe he was the alicorn of cooking

11247063
pretty sure from what he said his cutie mark was related to magic.

Looks like Sweet still needs to learn a few things about interdimensional travel. First and foremost, ascertaining the duration of his absence before making assumptions about who's in charge, how the social and political structures have changed since his departure, etc. Also the racism, but I guess that's more or less to be expected, given his background.

“A little,” he admitted. “But you wouldn’t take me half as seriously if I said the kind of things my neighbors did the last few years. Who’s my little pogchamp? This town has so many cute doggos!” He twisted his face in disgust. “And worse, language mutates so fast that the way everypony talks today will be completely altered in a year. Little bird carries away something unfortunate on Twitter, and next thing you know there’s a new word. Language is a virus, children. One way or another, you’re going to get sick.”

Oh god, I can feel his pain.

Huh j just realized he was banished to current Era humanity. I'm also quite curious since he does mention he knows ritual magic if it's a lost art or not.

One thing I'm curious about is how off he is due to thinking about the castle so he must be at a minimum one milinnium or even more.

11246986
Celestia.
Luna.
Sweet Sauce.
Yes, that is definitely a sensible and consistent pattern. :V
(I'm not saying you're wrong, I'm saying the inconsistent naming scheme is hilarious)

11247063
Cooking up SCHEMES!

Looks like he had a visit in EqG world or our world. Nice story so far

THat was quick thinking! Though, maybe its just me, but PIp and Dinky at the start don't look very afraid for their lives with the timberwolves

First rule of time travel, locate when you are relative to when you were.

I love this!

11247878
Exactly what I said! For all his postulating on the exploitable assumptions of foals, he's at least as guilty as they.

Ah, I like this this guy.

Sweet Sauce is going to be pissed when he finds out what Celestia did to the bats.

“Celestia, Luna, Cadance, Twilight. Rulers of Equestria four. The first one…” He stopped his recitation, interrupting the rhyming meter. “Okay, I forget the rest. But it’s not my fault! Feels like every year it gets longer!”

:rainbowlaugh: It's not easy for anypony when new demigods keep popping out of the woodwork.

In any case, reality's setting in to a degree that not even Sweet's arrogance can ignore. He'll have a lot to deal with in the morning.

(So, who wants to tell him there are stairs down to the Tree?)

Foci is just the plural of focus. If you have a single thing, you have a focus. If you have multiple, you have foci.
Only reason I'm even mentioning it is because this is the third story I've seen in the past two weeks that used "foci" to refer to a singular focus, and my OCD is driving me crazy.

These little ponies have families at home, and they’ve waited long enough.

Twi, gotta turn your ears up a notch. One of 'em doesn't— told you that explicitly. :ajbemused:

Heh, loved Dinky's innocence at the end, nice job!

And don't take this the wrong way, I can't get Sweet Sauce 's design out of my head

depths of eldritch perplexitude

Wow. That colt is either going to go all evil, or write comic books. Could go either way.

eldritch perplexitude

The ultimate madness, being able to resurrect something worse than dead ponies, the winning Soufflé recipe...
Also for being able to just create a word that doesn't exist. :fluttershbad:

11248730
Why not both

He didn’t look back. Not terribly friendly perhaps, but friendship took effort better spent on something more productive. “Nah, thanks anyway. Good luck with your rural drudgery, workhorse!”

Im still not sure how i feel about boopy comm'ing you to finally get this done over, writing it themselves. Reguardless im glad sweet's charchter is still alive and amusing as the original drafts from forever ago.

“Who’s my little pogchamp? .”

Im done. 😂

My quest to find the princesses will require effort elsewhere.

"You're looking for the princesses? We could've just gotten on the train to Canterlot!"
"... We could have what?"

I can understand the adults refusing to believe Sweet; his story's too outrageous to take at face value for anyone on his side of the fourth wall. At first, anyway. He may be able to push it past the point of deniability, but it can take a lot to break through Twilight's first assumption. (Mentioning necromancy may do it, especially if he get into the gory details.) On the other hand, if she insists on keeping him near for the sake of giving him some adult supervision, he'll have access to a direct line to Celestia. Whether he'll know that is another matter...

11248709
She isn't paying attention ! Though you'd think she would, after the mention of necromancy...

Either twiggles is not paying attention or is doing the assuming game again. You'd think she'd learn after zecora but apparently not.

Also I am really curious as to what he did to get banished. The fact he knows dark magic means he read about it in the human world or knew about from research. More and more mysteries from our time displaced friend.

Comment posted by midnight arrow deleted May 23rd, 2022

i will say if luna can get away with just comming back and a blast of the elements then if they punish him would it be exessive? i mean he was banished during a time when luna was still around so over 1 thousand years ago and also has lost his age and horn. Im pretty sure that would be punishment enough as we know that luna got off for what she did for less

heh, won't be that bad, Sauce

11249673
To quote from Winning, and the Pitfalls Therein:

“Rule of law is actually on your side, too, right now." Twilight considered that this mess was completely worth it to see the Princess's face contorting almost as oddly as Discord's. “Your situation is nearly identical to that of Princess Luna's from a year or so ago, and she wasn't just re-banished the second she came back. She even kept the whole night-eternal thing up for a full day or two without reprimand, so you should be able to slide on the bizarre weather and other bits of chaos.

“If we look over your situation, you're a former ruler of Equestria who became a danger to the land and its residents, and were thus sealed away with the Elements of Harmony. That description fits Princess Luna's situation identically, and she got her position back. One thousand years on the moon is apparently the appropriate sentence for that sort of thing, and you were locked up longer than that; you've served your time."

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