//------------------------------// // I Get Asked How My Ogres and Oubliettes Character Is Evil // Story: Pinkie Pie's Evil Clone Saves Equestria // by owlicious //------------------------------// After another session of Ogres and Oubliettes of a long series of adventures, my husband Puzzle Box asked me, “How is your character even evil? She’s been doing nothing but good things so far!” I pointed my hoof at the character sheet. “‘Evil’ is written right here on Peerless Archer’s character sheet and backstory!”, My husband continued arguing, “She put herself at risk and defeated the evil Creature of Ruin threatening the Kingdom of Fun!” “She lives there, and it'd spread to other kingdoms! Also, evil villains stab each other in the back all the time, when it benefits them. She was taking a calculated risk that succeeded and got our party’s characters more influence and power and items.” I enthusiastically continued, “It helps with her long-term scheme to replace the government with her Evil Party forever. Once she does that, she’ll do all sorts of evil things, such as pranking her loyal subjects, imprisoning anycreature that poses a threat to her, and letting everycreature in the kingdom make out without even being engaged.” He looked baffled, and said, “The first one’s only bad if her subjects are harmed by it. And that last one isn’t even evil, but that explains some things. Seriously, what did your parents teach you in homeschool?” I blink, and ask “It isn’t evil? Then why does that stallion with that megaphone and billboard keep saying that it’s evil?” My husband looked at me, confused, and responded, “That’s just his opinion, it isn’t evil. But that explains a lot.” Wait, what! Making out wouldn’t have even been evil? Twilight, Luna, and Celestia or the guards weren’t going to lock me up if I got caught doing that before getting engaged? He continued, “Peerless Archer rescued that filly from a monster!” “It helped with her long term evil plan. Peerless took precautions to keep her party safe, and got experience points for it.” “Okay, but name one evil thing your character actually did.” I put my foreleg on the table and stated, “She killed that bipedal goat monster, and convinced everypony else in her party to help her.” “That was Asriel, the King of the Monsters! It was the Last Boss of the Ominous Caverns! It was scary and enormous, and it led all of those monsters that were trying to kill us!” How doesn’t he understand what evil is? “Yeah, but just look at this picture!”, I exclaimed, picking up the game manual, flipping to the page with his adorable picture and my doodles in the margins, and held it up. “He had these cool, sharp fangs and horns, and cute, soft, fluffy white fur! And our party just ambushed him with poison, and killed him for the money, materials, and the extra experience points. He was minding his own business, and our party broke into his Labyrinth. Peerless could have avoided killing him, but she didn’t care. Nopony even checked if he had friends or family!” I continued yelling, “Evil isn’t just about villainous speeches, evil actions that horrify everycreature, or grand villainous schemes, even if many of the threats to Equestria did that! It’s also about less obvious things, such as being selfish or indifferent. As well as treating other creatures like they aren’t fellow creatures, or not caring about them or wanting them to suffer just because they’re different from you, or not somecreature close to you!” “It would have gone after us if we stole its hoard and left it alive.” He had a point. “Maybe?” I slammed a hoof on the table, and continued making my point, “Another thing! Peerless Archer is a disguised, unreformed changeling, who’s secretly stealing love from her party members and lying to them!” “Her party members aren’t being hurt. And maybe he would accept her if they knew. And she could always reform.” “But Peerless doesn’t know if they’ll accept her; she’s sure they’ll kill her! And stop metagaming!” He looked worried, “You’re not a changeling, right?” “Nope!”, I exclaimed, giggling. “I’d still love you if you were one. Even an unreformed one.” “Thanks, but I’m not one. ” I said, and put on a fake smile, nuzzling him, then grinned, and exclaimed, “I’d tell you if I was a changeling. Then we could have all sorts of fun! I could make some pretty hilarious impressions, like the time Princess Celestia got drunk and sent her royal guards to the moon for their opinions about bananas!” I’m less than a changeling. While he isn’t looking, I frown. Even the changelings are now accepted by everycreature in Equestria. I can’t legally be a citizen of Equestria, and it isn’t even a crime to send me or my former sisters to the Mirror Pool. He burst out laughing and looked at me, so I faked a smile again. “What’s so funny?” “Peerless Archer. Her name didn’t just mean that she was talented. She also thought she was alone and had no peers.” I laughed, then shouted, “Well, duh!”