4- A Gift of Earth and Water
Five hundred spears of dark wood and dull metal stood ramrod straight in the light of the setting sun. It would have been more poetic if they caught and reflected the beautiful oranges and yellows. However, the thestrals were nothing if not professional.
They stood in perfectly neat rows, separated by perfectly equal amounts of space. Their formation took up an entire third of the Palace’s training yard. Around them, Royal Guards brandished their own spears and weapons in a show of force. They were also yelling bad words.
‘I wonder if the Royal Guards are upset about this sudden intrusion…. Nah, surely not.’
My own squad of Red Right Hoof bodyguards fanned out around me as I set down. Spying Celestia from above, I had landed close enough to dramatically walk over to join her.
‘Now I’m wondering if ponies and changelings view landing to be as dramatic as walking over. I just can’t; humans ain’t got no wings!’
Princess Celestia was accompanied by her own squad of Royal Guards. They were those specialized commandos that I never got to see in action: the War Wizards and members of Orders whose service records dated back centuries. This time, she was surrounded by a total of six unicorns, three pegasi, and three earth ponies– twice the size of her old personal guard.
Across from Celestia, Elder Sanguine, the de-facto ruler of Trotsylvania– or rather just the city of Vallachia, considering there were few towns throughout the rest of the county– and the thestrals, stood with several other Elders and thestrals.
“–everything so difficult?” I heard Celestia say as I arrived.
“Apologies, Your Highness, if our arrival causes you problems,” Elder Sanguine bowed. “It seems that we have a newly found habit of missing important battles. Though I’m sure you’re glad we missed Nightmare Moon’s arrival… Ah, King Phasma!”
“Elder Sanguine,” I nodded. “To what do we owe the pleasure? If you’re hoping to invade Canterlot, then I’m afraid you’ve lost the advantage of surprise. It’s really going to be difficult to win now.”
“Ha. Ha. Ha,” Celestia laughed sarcastically. “Elder Sanguine here was just saying how Vallachia was ready to stand with Equestria till the end. Really, she meant ready to stand with Princess Luna till the end, but she’s far too kind to say that explicitly.”
“Must be strange, seeing ponies who aren’t utterly loyal to you,” I commented.
Celestia shrugged, “The real problem is that they decided to land an army in the middle of Canterlot without any heads-up. You’re lucky that I had spotted your arrival personally before anypony else did. The whole city would have been in panic if I hadn’t given orders to stand down!”
“Again, I must apologize,” Elder Sanguine said. “We are not used to… Equestria.”
“Why exactly are you here?” I asked.
“The Night Mistress will have need of our spears in the upcoming war against the Blight. The… Nightmares. This time, we intend to be early rather than late.”
“In other words,” Celestia sighed, “now we will have to balance four tribes and a total of two species within our combined army. While I am always glad to incorporate more friends into Equestria, this is quite the inopportune time. Perhaps we will also have to make an official addition to the Canterlot Confederation.”
“We would be honored,” Elder Sanguine bowed. “Though, if I may ask, where is the Night Mistress right now?”
“On her way,” Celestia told the Elder.
“After all these years, we will finally get to meet the Mistress,” another Elder said.
“Princess Celestia, King Phasma, this is Elder Vigilance,” Sanguine introduced the thestral.
As usual with thestral fashion, Elder Vigilance was dressed in a manner that anyone with a passing recognition of fiction would recognize as a vampire. In fact, every Elder had chosen the color scheme of black with red interior for their outfits. The thestral soldiers had a similar, if muted, color scheme and uniform design.
Despite this, they vehemently refused the idea that they were vampires.
“It is an honor to meet you,” Elder Vigilance bowed. “Elder Sanguine will be busy with keeping the other bickering Elders in order in Vallachia. I will be responsible for the Night Guard here in Equestria.”
I raised an eyebrow, “Night Guard?”
Celestia was just as puzzled, “Night Guard?”
“Night Guard,” Elder Sanguine smiled. “Trotsylvania has maintained a rather sizable standing army, considering how small our County is. Given our expertise, we Elders have decided to bridge the gap and rejoin Equestria… in our own ways. Five hundred of our finest warriors, for the Princesses to use as they see fit.”
“That’s…. very kind of you,” Celestia said. “I am–”
Luna, Cadance, and Shining Armor finally arrived, exiting the Palace and quickly trotting over to us.
“What is the meaning of this?!” Shining Armor asked nervously. “Princess, I hear that you ordered the Royal Guard to stand down?! There’s–”
“Captain Shining Armor, Princess Luna, and Princess Cadance,” Celestia cut him off, “this is Elder Sanguine and Elder Vigilance of Vallachia. And their army.”
“Greetings, Elders,” Luna smiled. “I believe the last we saw each other was the Gala, no? I am happy to see you all. Happier than our aggravated Captain, clearly.”
“Princess, I… For now, I really must stress the importance of these procedures,” Shining said quickly.
“We are not invading,” Sanguine explained.
“You sure look like you are!” Shining insisted.
“Which is why I prevented the alarms from being raised. I recognized the thestrals when I noticed their arrival,” Celestia added. “Thankfully I was stargazing at the time during one of my increasingly-available breaks. Thanks again, Luna and Cadance.”
“It’s nothing, Tia,” Cadance said. “I’ll gladly listen to angry nobles if it means helping out.”
“What if they were invading?” Shining glared at Celestia. “Say, what if they were a species capable of changing how they look?”
“... That’s fair,” Celestia admitted. “I am sorry for causing you to panic, Captain, as well as disregarding protocols. I am used to keeping the ponies calm whenever possible…”
“I am also sorry for not announcing our arrival,” Elder Sanguine apologized. “It is my fault. It will not happen again.”
“... Wait, you’re recognizing that you did something bad?” Shining asked.
“Yes?” Sanguine replied slowly.
“And you are apologizing for it?”
“Yes?” Sanguine repeated.
Shining blinked slowly, “... Huh. Apology accepted. Sorry, I’m not used to ponies stallioning up and understanding that they are in the wrong. I’m used to dealing with King Phasma.”
“And I’ll burn Canterlot to the ground a third time, just for the fun of it!” I snapped back with a smirk.
“To what do we owe the pleasure of your sudden and… noticeable visit?” Luna asked the thestrals.
“The Night Guard,” I said.
“The Night Guard?” Luna repeated.
Sanguine nodded, “The Night Guard.”
“Ah, the Night Guard,” Shining nodded as well. “.... What’s the Night Guard?”
“It is something that has not existed in Equestria since my banishment,” Luna admitted. “An all-thestral elite cadre of Royal Guards. Who also work the night shift. The superior shift, if I do say so myself! Regardless this is an… unexpected development.”
“Princess Luna, Alicorn of the Moon, Stars, and Dreams!” Elder Vigilance bowed deeply. “We have come to pledge our swords to you! Forgive our negligence and absence! We will happily give our lives in your service!”
“By the right granted by Princess Platinum, Commander Hurricane, and Chancellor Puddinghead, I accept your fealty,” Luna intoned. “May I be as deserving of your loyalty as you are of mine.”
Elder Vigilance rose from her bow as the five hundred thestral soldiers banged the ends of their spears against the ground in unison five times.
Luna turned to Shining Armor, “Captain, see to it that the Night Guard have quarters to stay in, food to eat, and so forth. If necessary, I am sure that King Phasma is willing to quarter the thestrals in the Crystal Caves…?”
I shrugged, “We’ll probably need to buy more beds if that happens. But yes, the thestrals are more than welcome within the Fifth Hive.”
“Good,” Luna nodded once with a slight incline of her head.
Celestia picked up where her sister left off, “Elder Sanguine and Vigilance, I invite you both to dine with us this evening. There is much we will have to discuss if we are to welcome thestrals into Equestria.”
“It will be an honor,” Elder Sanguine said.
“There is much to go over,” Elder Vigilance agreed.
“I hope you don’t mind that King Phasma will be joining us,” Celestia said, gesturing to me.
“The changelings are friends of Vallachia,” Sanguine dismissed her worries. “It will be a joy to find out what has happened from the warrior-King himself.”
“I still owe you for saving my life,” I replied. “You will always be welcome in any lands under my protection.”
“Then let us be off, for there is drinking and merriment to be had!” Luna cheered.
Lieutenant Sulfur Drip watched the royalty depart from the training field.
Immediately, Captain Shining Armor of the Royal Guards issued orders to the subordinates of his that had been watching from the sidelines. Orders to check for clear rooms, prepare double the amount of food for dinner, and so on were issued. Sulfur Drip, being the second in command of the Night Guard after Elder Vigilance, sauntered over to the unicorn.
“Captain Shining Armor,” she greeted him.
“That’s me,” Shining squinted at her.
“I am Lieutenant Sulfur Drip,” Sulfur introduced herself. “I am the second in command for the Night Guard. I believe we will be working together extensively in the future…”
“Yes, you and the Lieutenants and Captains of every other military organization in Equestria,” Shining huffed. “It’s nice to make your acquaintance,” he said, offering a hoof.
Sulfur Drip bumped it, “Likewise.”
“Lieutenant Cobalt, Lieutenant Simmons, go disseminate the news of our new guests. Er, comrades,” Shining ordered to two Royal Guards standing nearby.
“Nice meeting you, ma’am,” one pony saluted.
“We’ll meet properly later,” the other said before turning smartly and marching off.
Sulfur gave her own orders, “At ease, soldiers! Coal, you’re in charge until Vigilance or I return.”
The thestrals relaxed their postures while a thestral with bronze epaulets saluted, “Yes sir. We’ll try not to mess up the day-ponies’ mustering field while we’re waiting.”
“Well, Sulfur,” Shining sighed, “We’ve got a lot of ground to cover. Let’s get out of the cold and actually get a plan together while our superiors shmooze and socialize with each other.”
“If that is how things are done around here,” Sulfur nodded.
“Great, I’ve got an office with a lot of comfy chairs. Let’s figure this out there. By the way, has anypony ever told you that you sound like a vampire?”
Sulfur sighed, “There have never been any vampires in Vallachia.”
“How would you know that?” Shining pointed out as he guided them into the Palace.
“There’s never been any vampires in Vallachia,” Sulfur repeated.
“Right, so you just dress like ‘em, talk like ‘em, and… I don’t have a third thing, but you get my point.”
The two made their way into and through the Palace in quiet conversation. Sulfur was busy trying to hide her stares at all the strange decorations in the Palace. Diamonds, rubies, gold, paintings, sculptures, and more practically coated every surface. Even the servants’ halls had more décor than what Sulfur Drip had seen in some of the more well of manors. By comparison, the castle in Vallachia that the Elders and Sulfur called home was practically a hovel.
At least, that was the case from Sulfur’s perspective. The less austere ponies and changelings of Canterlot probably had different opinions.
Captain Shining Armor’s office just so happened to overlook the training and mustering fields where the thestrals had gathered. From their higher view, Sulfur could see that the ponies had begrudgingly resumed their training drills and skirmish practices around the thestrals.
The thestrals, for their part, had broken up into little groups to talk amongst themselves. Spears lay piled against rucksacks and the boxes carried all the way from Vallachia. Here and there, a Royal Guard or two were attempting to make conversation with the new arrivals.
Sulfur Drip wished them well on their attempts to socialize, even if she was glad that she was not one of the thestrals forced to talk to one of the day-ponies.
“So, the Night Guard,” Shining sighed as he sat down behind his desk.
Sulfur scratched that last thought away as she realized she did, in fact, have to socialize.
“The scope of our capabilities will be limited,” Sulfur announced, taking a seat in front of the large desk. “There are only five hundred of us for now.”
“Limited to patrolling Canterlot and the Palace, then.” Shining opened a drawer and fished out a dark-blue bottle, “Drink?”
“I was under the impression that Equestria prohibited alcohol.”
Shining shrugged, “Only those up-tight nobles of the Royal Court care. Celestia herself keeps the Palace supplied through King Phasma. It’s one of the few blessings that ling has brought us…”
‘Vigilance did say to partake in Equestrian culture, no matter how strange it is..’
“Then I will partake, thank you,” Sulfur accepted a glass full of liquid.
Taking a cautionary glance and sniff, she deduced that it was wine. However, this wine was white– completely unlike the deep hues of scarlet red that wine should have. She tactfully hid a grimace as she took a sip.
“While in the Palace, I expect you and your ponies to act with a certain level of professionalism and kindness,” Shining began.
Sulfur Drip slowly relaxed into her chair as she got comfortable for the next two or three hours of lectures and arguments.
Sulfur Drip left the Captain’s office flush, frustrated, and bored. Four hours of non-stop talking about rules, regulations, and laws (and apparently how all three were separate things).
Normally, to relieve the stresses of a particularly bad day, Sulfur would either bury herself in her work and train until her bones creaked, or she would get drunk on whatever wine she could get her hooves on. The life of an enlisted soldier often led to the latter method of relaxing being preferred.
'Buck it, we got to meet the Night Mistress and we got reinstated as Night Guards. This definitely is a night for celebrations!'
Sulfur had arrived in the training yard, only to find that all the thestrals had filtered out in the time it took for her to find her way out of the Palace from Shining’s office. Sulfur cursed her luck and tried asking the locals where the thestrals had gone.
Unfortunately, the unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies of the E.U.P. found it more entertaining to make fun of her accent and ask her questions about thestrals in general than to help her find her soldiers. Eventually, she managed to learn that the thestrals had gone to the Crystal Caves after failing to secure lodgings within the Palace herself.
“You okay there?”
The voice roused Sulfur from her thoughts. She turned on her hooves, patience already worn thin by the pestering and unhelpfulness of the Royal Guards. A changeling stood behind her, looking at her with those blank, blue eyes.
“... No? Yes. No, I am not,” she said after a moment of surprised silence. “I was looking for my friends. My soldiers.”
“Ah,” the changeling nodded.
“I was told they went to the Crystal Caves,” Sulfur continued.
“That’s interesting.”
“... I would appreciate it if you flew with me there. I am new to this mountain. I do not know the way to these Crystal Caves.”
The changeling nodded again and stuck out a hoof, “Sure thing. Name’s Thalamus. I can take ya there.”
Sulfur bumped the changeling’s hoof with her own, “Lieutenant Sulfur Drip. Might I have your rank, my sister-in-arms?”
“Ha! Sorry, Sulfur, but I’m just a drone. And not a sister. Though since we don’t have manes, I can understand why you would make that mistake,” Thalamus shook his head.
Sulfur blinked slowly, “... Ah. Apologies.”
An awkward silence descended upon the two. Sulfur let it drag on a bit before she realized that it was up to her to continue the conversation.
“... The Crystal Caves?”
“Oh, right!” The changelings chuckled and began buzzing his wings, lifting off from the ground. “I’m done for the night, anyways. Let’s talk more on the way.”
Then he was off.
Sulfur took off from the training yard, catching up quickly to the changeling. She slowed her pace, matching Thalamus’s.
“You are not a soldier,” Sulfur said.
“Every changeling is, in a way. But no, I talk to ponies and file paperwork nowadays.”
“I understand,” Sulfur said, quietly flapping her thin wings. “The soldier thing. Not talking to ponies. Every thestral knows how to fight, even if they don’t serve in the Sisterhood. Or the Night Guard, as it is now known.”
“But you’re a career soldier?” Thalamus asked.
“Yes. I am the successor to Elder Vigilance. I have already been honored with her weapons. You, uh… who is your mentor?”
“Changelings don’t really have mentors,” Thalamus explained. “Well, Infiltrators do. I work under Coxa and King Phasma. There was no one who taught me how to do my job.”
“That is… impressive?” Sulfur guessed.
“Thanks! King Phasma gave me some guiding points, but it was mostly up to me to figure it out. You ponies make even simple things very complicated.”
“The Equestrians certainly do that,” Sulfur agreed. “What is it that you do?”
Thalamus smiled, “It’s boring, really. I keep track of land. Buying, selling, keeping maintained, and so on. The Fifth Hive has stuff all over the Kingdom now. It’s… weird. Nothing like that back in the Fourth.”
“I am sure you will make a fine steward, Thalamus,” Sulfur said.
“Thestrals are new to all this, too, right?”
Sulfur cleared her throat, “To some things. Mostly, we are like Equestrians. Yet such small differences cast wide cams. Chasms,” she corrected herself.
“You sure you’re okay?” Thalamus pressed. “I understand you have a thick accent, but–”
“I am fine. Just had a little bit to drink. Though if I’m being honest, I would prefer more…”
“You can join me for a drink in the Caves. We’ve got all the good stuff in there– way more than the mushroom shit we had in the Fourth.”
“... Strong stuff?”
Thalamus laughed, “Strong stuff!”
Sulfur Drip found herself huddled around a large pink rock. Around her, four changelings were utterly under her spell.
“So no horseapples, there we were,” she continued her story. “The Duke’s barn was gone. Poof. Bam. Made like the stars and vanished. Then, uh… Elder Bulwark arranged to meet the Duke. Because of war. It’s bad… and burning the barn could have started one? He was not happy with me. The Duke was not happy either. I speak with this Duke, yes? This pony, he… said I drink blood of ponies. Very rude of him…”
“Do you?” Thalamus asked, leaning against her as he swayed from side to side.
“Do I?”
“Drink blood.”
“No,” Sulfur gave him as harsh of a stare as she could manage. “No thestral does. It tastes bad. Except when it’s in wine, but daywalkers don’t like hearing that.”
Thalamus shrugged, “We lit-er-ah-ly suck out emotions and eat them. Blood sounds… fine?”
Sulfur snorted, “Yes! You sound more like vampires than thestrals do! Ha… blood… Anyways, where was I?”
“The Duke?” A changeling offered.
“The Duke. I bow and scrape and apologize, and Elder Bulwark paid for a new barn. This Duke accepted the money and apology. Then kicked us out… After we left, Bulwark and Vigilance agreed: the training op was a complete success! But I had to scrub latrines for a week since I got caught. I am also banned from using oil pots. That part stinks worse than the latrines!”
“Making explosions is pretty fun,” one of the changelings sighed. “I’ve got a similar story. Saint Phasma got a little too close to my fireballs and banned me from using them…”
Thalamus laughed and slammed the table, “Kevin, you nearly burned his tail off! Three times! You’re lucky he didn’t kill you!”
“Psssh, he was totally fine! ‘Sides, it’s not like Saint Phasma ever executed anyling.”
“Except for Tarsus,” Thalamus pointed out.
“The Traitor lives, despite all he’s done,” Kevin shot back. “.... Ergh, I think we’re out?”
The changeling tipped over a bottle of spirits, dripping a little bit onto the shiny crystal table. Sighing, he dropped the bottle.
“Think it’s ‘bout time to head in, anyways,” he said.
“Right, catch you guys later,” another changeling agreed, standing up and staggering away.
Soon, it was just Thalamus and Sulfur Drip left at the table. The cave chamber they were in was still occupied, as a number of other changelings and even a few thestrals had gathered around tables in similar groups to their own. It was the closest thing to a tavern that Sulfur had seen all day, and she had been reluctant to leave.
“You wanna spend the night at my place?” Thalamus asked her. “I’ve got an actual bed in my quarters. Perks of being high command!”
Sulfur sighed, “I must stay with my troops in the barracks. Sleeping in a bed sounds nice, though… Wait, one bed? Where would you sleep?”
Thalamus blinked, “... In the same bed?”
“The bed fits both of us?”
“If we’re on top of each other,” Thalamus winked.
“.... That sounds scandalous,” Sulfur said, beginning to blush.
“What? Never had sex before?”
“No!”
Thalamus raised his hooves, “Whoah, calm down. I was just proposing a bit of fun.”
“That is….!” Sulfur breathed deeply, her training already grinding away the anger that had flared up. “That is not how things are done in Trotsylvania…”
“No?”
She crossed her hooves, “No. There is a great deal of courtship! You have not even presented me with moonstones or other gifts! How are we to be together forever if we do not know each other?!”
Thalamus frowned, “Forever?”
“If I bear a foal, do you expect me to raise it alone?”
Thalamus hissed quietly, “That’s not how it’s done in here. Or is it? I don’t know anymore, not with the things that Coxa is planning to announce…”
“How are things done in your Kingdom normally?” Sulfur asked, genuinely curious.
“We.. you know, have fun. Then we part. One ling lays an egg, which is taken to be raised with the rest of the brood. That’s… it.”
Sulfur sagged, “That is… horrible. And not possible! I do not lay eggs!”
Thalamus giggled, “Oh yeah. That’s weird.”
“I’m the weird one?”
Thalamus poked her, “You’re the weird one.”
“Well, maybe you’re the weird one,” Sulfur poked him back.
“Heh, maybe… So it’s a no, then?”
Sulfur opened her mouth, ready to tell him off. But then she thought about it.
‘I’ll likely be taking the vows myself and become an Elder under Vigilance’s guidance. Screw being celibate, I would rather enjoy life before I give everything for the Princess! Vigilance said we would be learning Equestrian culture. This is similar to how things are done in Equestria, I think… Sounds like I have permission!’
“Is there a way to not bear a foal if we do?” Sulfur asked.
“Course there is. All changelings know the spells– if you bear an egg at the wrong moment, it could ruin your standing with the Queen! Even the guys know the spell, since it was required learning. They, uh, didn’t want us to have a lot of eggs…”
“Haha! Then let us retire for the evening!” Sulfur cheered, attracting some stares from the thestrals in the room.
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Thalamus and Sulfer sitting in a tree....
K I S S I N G !
"When I first came here, Canterlot was still standing! Everyling said I was daft for trying to burn it down! But I did it anyway! Then I got pimp slapped by my mom, and the ponies rebuilt. So I attacked it again! I succeeded, but mom ruined everything again. So I burned it down a third time, just for fun! I had to help build it up again so we could fight against Sombra, but after the war I burned it down a fourth time! And this time, it stayed burnt down!"
Also, it does my heart good to see the changelings start a sexual revolution. They're the ultimate rainbow coalition, and free love is their mission!
Thestrals and changelings against the overwhelming cultural imperialism of equestrians, let's fucking gooooo!!
Night Guard.
-Luluuu! Its the annual Changelings' Canterlot Invasion & destruction timeeee!
-Yes Phasma ...
The Night Guard!
C'mon Shining, you can do better than that!
Yayyy Kevin!
Thestral? With fluffy ear tips and absolutely adorable fangs?
Would it even be possible for a pony and a changeling to have a viable offspring?
All the hoove holding and snu-snu
A night to remember
The hangover will be unkind...
Why, nooooo. Wherever would you get that impression?
I believe this is what they call "irony".
I think I sense a pattern.
In other words; hit it!
Oh, dear. This will be interesting.
And cultures were explored! No regerts!
They really should have sent a runner first. It's not that outdated of a practice.
Makes one wonder if the population density suffered due to the complicated social practices, especially if the birth ratio is similar...
"so no dung, there I was, news of a foal on the way. Turns out bugs and bats are compatible, who knew?...."
Changeling-threstral sex, not sure how that’s gonna work, but what do I know…Guess Phasma already has it covered with Luna though.
For the record, arms-as-in-weapons and arms-as-in-forelimbs are etymologically unrelated. Since this phrase is using the former, it shouldn't be ponified beyond the RGRE usage.
I am disappointed to see that while everyone is more focused on threstral/Changeling bedroom relations, they have completely forgotten one thing:
KEIVIN IS NOW IN THE STORY!
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Really? Huh. I should look into that. Thanks for the correction...
You know, if we count Phasma's participation in the two battles of Canterlot and the time he released Discord then he has already (partially) destroyed Canterlot thrice.
Although Discord didn't burn it, as far as we know, so I suppose Phasma's still correct.
Also, if this is how most 'lings view things, I can't help but once more wonder why the egg-clutch system needs to be reformed at all. Or why it can't continue to exist alongside families, at least.
i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/030/952/goofy.jpg
Good chapter! And I totally ship those 2
There are no wolves on Fenris.
11393194
There is no war in ba sing say
Fun fact: Kevin existed in a Fimfiction story still to be finished... Before become a canon character.
11392548
Bat-Ling or Change-Bat? As long the have fluffy eartips everything should be fine
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Canterlot Noble Unicorn:
"Unicorn first since we are the best!"
Changelings:
"Lings can magic and fly..."
Canterlot Noble Pegasus: "We are the best aerial force in general!"
Thestrals:
"Every citizen is combat trained and one of our past times is training"
*Flex body and the armor comes off from the bulking muscle DBZ style*
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Fluffy eartips and Chitin ? Sounds neat to have.
Military grade Armor plus natural armor and fluffy eartips to nibble on? Perfection
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Luna isn't a Thestral... Unless... Role-playing?
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Kevin, love the storys where he is depicted as so proficient in infiltration he skips the Shapeshifting part
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Clutch raising is more effectively indeed, but personally raised Nymphs will prevent more likely another 'Tarsus' to grow up...
11393194
Good one, do you know 'TTS Warhammer 40K' ?
Nice. Bat ponies getting pounded
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Fraking love it!
Sad that GW went super asshole mode and it got cancelled.
11393393
To quote the Guardian of Metal from Brütal Legend,
11393418
Well, for example...
Also,
If Luna doesn't have the first half-Changeling hybrid, I will be upset!
So it’s like THAT, huh?
11392548
And they're gonna do more than that, once they leave the tree!
11392752
Not to worry, there's PLENTY of fan-artists on Derpibooru who've been thinking about exactly how it works!
11392594
Why does this feel like that bit with the ice cream?
Oh great, Equestria's own Burn Jita event...
Hey, I don't want no-
Wait, Shining's here now.
I'm coverin' up my head!
A Boot to the Head.
*THUMP!*
Shining: "OOF!"
And one more for Upper Crust and the wimp!
(distantly)
*THUMP!*
Upper Crust: "AAUGH!"
*THUMP!*
Jet Set: "OOUGH!"
Afterward, at the meeting of the Royals and the Thestrals...
Sanguine: "Princess Luna? Is something troubling King Phasma? He's been rather still and silent..."
Phasma: "..."
Luna: "Phasma?"
Phasma: "Huh?"
Luna: "What vexs you so? You've been staring at that ever since the... oddness outside."
Phasma: "What- How- Why- ...I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS!"
Cadance: "It's a boot. A boot that hit my Shining in the head, but it's just a boot... Isn't it?"
Phasma: "It's a boot... (holds up the offending footwear) FOR A HUMAN FOOT!"
Celestia: (spit-take)
I stand corrected, apparently it is that kinda story.
So, when do we get the romanticized version of the Thalamus and Sulfur's relationship, where one goes off to fight, leaving the other behind to worry, and do everything they can to get back to eachother?
11392606
Shapeshifting is as overpowered as the writers allow it to be.
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I know. Question remains, how overpowered is it allowed to be in this story?
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This may end in MUCH hilarity.
heh
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!!!!!
Absolutely priceless humor
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The night if the "eeeeeeeeeeeeeee"
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It will be GLORIOUS ♡
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Did you know they love to import blood bags
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You got to love the Art community of Fimfiction and beyond
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Haaa-Haaa!
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Still waiting for Changelings to pull a Transformer... Because they shift as well
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One Luna is fun, two Lunas has the fun doubled!
But a thousand Lunas...:
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I have my moments.
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Foalbearing overpowered perhaps. Otherwise the thought of Phas and Lunes not being able to have foals greatly saddens me
You certainly have a way with telling a story. First few sentences in to Sulfur Drips chapter I had a bit of whiplash from the perspective change. Now you've got me interested in the character.
I think my favorite running gag is the one where whenever multiple spells are cast, someone always throws a fireball regardless of it being needed. It's like the spirit of every d&d/pathfinder spellcaster is being summoned.
I did have to blink at that.
I thought those other two times were just for shits and giggles then, too.
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That literally happened with a group I was playing with back in college. We had one fellow who liked to play magic-users and would throw a fireball the moment his characters got to 5th lvl, regardless of if it was needed or not--mostly not. It got to the point where, like dealing with Ghandi in Civilization, the deities all ruled it was a legal act of self-defense to kill his characters just before they reached 5th, so that even paladins were absolved.
This one game being ran by one of our more inventive DMs, our party are all 1st lvl and we go into what is essentially a 10th lvl dungeon, but we have enough members to give us all a decent chance to survive. After figuring out all the traps, tricks, and winning the encounters, there's only a few of us left, and we're all still pretty banged up after taking out a dracolich at the end. We decided to rest up in that last lair before setting out to leave so that our spells would be refreshed. But we were all out of healing potions and most of us with lower single digit hit points, so no one was at full strength when we set out to go.
Also, all us players were mentally exhausted from going through the DM's maze, so no one was keeping track of the problem player's experience points.
Yes, by now, you can see where this is going...
Just before walking out of the last tunnel into daylight, the player passed a note to the DM, on it was written, "am I?". The DM snickered, smiled, and then nodded.
"FIREBALL!"
Killed us all!
Except him!
He survived his own blast with 1 HP left!!
And believe it or not, the player's name really is Kevin.
Thestral Soldier 1:
"Lieutenant Sulfur Dripis getting lucky tonight, but what has her attracted to him?"
Changeling Guard 2:
"Maybe this?"
*Transforms into a attractive pony*
Thestral Soldier 1:
"Neat, want to have some fun?"
Changeling Guard 2:
"Sure, lust is a nice snack for in between."
[ The next day a lot of Changelings had found Thestral partners to snack on. Nibble on lust until it eventually become affection and later love. ]
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Why shouldn't they have the ability to have foals?
After all, currently it would be bad if Luna get pregnant. No anti pregnancy spell needed if they are uncompatible.
Suggesting that Luna and Phasma holding back so Luna isn't slowed down with pregnancy in war times.
11 month carrying time for a pony after all.
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You're talkin about yourself?
Fireball-sorcerer was a trope even befire Lina Invers bcame a known entity. She was a parody on that.
The night of the bat-pone
camo.fimfiction.net/iwNGWxUgSxRinAV5nmNHYxGBFf6rMvUmpDUtS-Fp0OY?url=https%3A%2F%2Fs20.postimg.cc%2Fgbg86u1b1%2FBatty_Scene_Break.png
♡
KEVIN SPOTTED! Finally, I’ve been waiting for the greatest changeling of all time to make an appearance!