Paul's Thursday Reviews CCCXLIX · 9:07pm January 25th
First and foremost:
ItsVelvet is taking commissions to help out a friend. Ice Star's boyfriend is also in need, and everyone's favorite Skeeter needs some help too. Yes, these are a little late, but I figure the longer the word is out the more likely they are to get help.
In the meantime, I can’t help but notice how many people are using AI-generated images for cover art. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, it can be expensive commissioning good cover art from proper artists, and some people just can’t afford it. I’m sure many of these writers are thrilled to have a means of creating their own, generally relevant covers for free, even if some are only of mediocre quality.
Making good art with AI is hard though (from one who tried), enough so that there are actually people taking commissions for making it. Which leads to the thing I don’t like. I’m sure some artists out there make good money from cover art commissions, and I hate to see them suffering from this change.
I suppose it’s going to end up with a balance, at least for now. After all, if you want general art that gives people an idea of your intentions, you can use AI for free. But if you want exactly the right image with all the appropriate details, right now artists are the best way to go. I mean, you could spend hours fighting with an AI generator tool trying to get that hand to look just right and placing individual items in the background, but if you’re devoting that much effort to it you might as well learn to draw yourself. And if you could pay a guy to make the art with an AI tool, you might as well go with a real artist instead; your cover will look the way you want with the added bonus of not having the same style regurgitated a bajillion times all across the internet because of the AI’s programming.
I suppose where I’m going with this is that AI art isn’t bad in and of itself, I’m just hoping that people who can pay for commissions are sticking to the actual artists out there.
Alright, enough of that. Let’s get to the reviews.
Stories for This Week:
The Ponyville Files by LastToTheParty
Halvard and the Kindly Queen by Venerable Ro
The Rejected by Soufriere
Paper Girl by leeroy_gIBZ
The Love Bug by GreyPon3
2525: A Space Oddity by ROBCakeran53
Not-Yet-Princess Twilight Sparkle and the Tale of the Dark Empress of Teatime by kudzuhaiku
RED - Rock Farmers, Extremely Dangerous by ChibiRenamon
Flitter by Nyerguds
Superdeterminism by Cloud Hop
Total Word Count: 172,396
Rating System
Why Haven't You Read These Yet?: 2
Pretty Good: 4
Worth It: 4
Needs Work: 0
None: 0
The Ponyville Files
4,444 Words
By LastToTheParty
After much goading from Luna, Celestia has finally agreed to allow newly crowned Princess Twilight Sparkle access to the Equestrian Secret Service’s archives. After all, if she’s going to keep being at the forefront of the defense against Equestria’s greatest threats, she should know what is out there. Twilight is ecstatic… at first. But then she learns that someone close to her was a secret agent. If only she could decipher these stupid code names to figure out who.
To summarize the summary: One of the Mane Six has been a government agent all along, working to guide Twilight towards her ascension.
I like the idea behind this, and I really like how the clues gradually inform the reader just as much as Twilight as to who the secret agent is. If you know your show lore well enough, you should be able to figure it out pretty quick. But the interesting bit is that there were multiple agents identified in Ponyville and we only know the identities of two (one, of course, being Bon Bon). One has to wonder who the third is.
I think my only issue is that it turned into a ship at the end. I don’t feel that this was necessary. The concept and potential of the idea is strong enough without it, and it felt more tacked on than anything. There were so many ways LastToTheParty could have approached the ending and I regret that they went with this one.
Still, this was entertaining. Give it a go if you’re looking for the whole “secret Equestrian agency” concept from a somewhat less serious angle. Just don’t go in expecting the more obvious issues to be addressed (like Celestia chessmastering Twilight’s whole life).
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
Halvard and the Kindly Queen
3,069 Words
By Venerable Ro
In the rural borderlands lies Evergreen Hold, where Equestria’s fourth tribe, the humans, reside. The humans are tough, suspicious folk, charged with guarding inner Equestria of any potential dangers that might come from or pass through the forests. One day, mysterious entities begin causing playful mischief. Halvard, leader of the rangers, decides to investigate…
Full disclosure: Venerable Ro paid me to edit this story well in advance of its release, following my relatively recently begun editing service. So this is my second time going through it, though my first time seeing the final product.
Anyway, I won’t try to hide facts, since they’re out in the open via the tags: changelings have come to Evergreen Hold. But this story is set prior to the rise of Nightmare Moon, and these aren’t the malevolent changelings we know from the show’s early seasons. Venerable Ro treats them more akin to the fae creatures they are named for. Friendly and playful, they go unseen yet try to help the people of Evergreen Hold without really knowing how to do so, which leads to such silly moments like all the dust in a house being deposited in a bathtub.
Halvard, being the inquisitive sort, goes hunting the forest for the seemingly invisible creatures only to be confronted by their similarly impossible to find queen, Chrysalis. Thus do we get to the core of the story: a younger, kinder Chrysalis befriending the daring human who sought her out. The story is intentionally quirky, with none of Halvard’s dialogue (nor that of any humans, for that matter) actually shown but Chrysalis’s dialogue written out. It is a curious idea, almost making the humans seem the strange and mysterious ones in a world where they are, apparently, perfectly normal. It’s also an amusing counterbalance, since we can see what Halvard and the humans are doing at all times but Chrysalis and her changelings go unseen.
The depiction of Halvard’s interactions with Chrysalis is also great, her always being sneaky and refusing to let him see her despite their growing trust and friendship. Even though we know from the start that it’s Chrysalis, the way her identity remains hidden for most of the story seems intended not to deceive the reader but to maintain this playful, fairy tale atmosphere. In that regard it works wonderfully.
Huh. A fairy tale. The theming all comes together nicely. Why is it I don’t notice such things as readily until my second, much-later read through?
This manages to have humans in Equestria without it coming across as awkward or nonsensical, features an endearing interpretation of early changelings, and maintains a certain medieval fantasy atmosphere throughout. Even the way Halvard refers to Chrysalis as “Lady” all the time evokes thoughts of old fantasy tales (I don’t know why, but The Canterbury Tales comes to mind).
This was a pleasant read, full of whimsy and playful mysteriousness, while also creating a vivid and approachable world that feels remarkably lived in for how little time it exists. It’s a dense story that feels longer than it is, but in a good way. Adding a dash of ominous Equestrian history but remaining a strong friendshipping tale, it’s something I highly recommend.
One has to wonder how Chrysalis went from the kind, endearing nymph we see here to the villain she later becomes.
Bookshelf: Why Haven’t You Read These Yet?
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
The Rejected
11,500 Words
By Soufriere
Sequel to And That's Good Enough
All Rarity wants is to date Sunset Shimmer. Alas, she lacks the requisite bravery to actually ask the girl out, and so has been resorting to hints and simply sticking around Sunset as much as possible. In the meantime, Sunset prepares for a very important, personal project and Flash Sentry tries to rebuild a burned bridge.
I’m really not sure Rarity’s situation counts as a rejection. If the person you’re interested in is hopelessly clueless about said interest, is it really rejection?
Also, throughout this entire story I couldn’t stop thinking of this particular scene:
Anyway, this is one of the more complex stories in Soufriere’s long-running Sunset Recovery Arc series. At this point Sunset is largely recovered from her near-suicidal bout of depression and self-harm thanks in no small part to Rarity’s help. Now she’s trying to write… something for Celestia. An apology letter, perhaps? It’s hard to say, because Sunset is doing a ton of research and looking into long-dead Equestrian languages and it’s like “Is all this really necessary for a mere apology letter?” So I don’t know for sure what she’s doing, because she’s/Soufriere’s not willing to elaborate.
While she’s doing that, Rarity (the perspective for the story) is struggling to find a way to confess her interest in Sunset. She keeps dropping clues, some of them blatant. Sunset is, alas, hopelessly unobservant when it comes to such matters. Thus does Rarity confide in the one person who might be able to relate: Flash Sentry.
I love the interactions between Flash and Sunset. It’s snarky, snippy, and full of grudges. You can really feel the past between them through their mutual disdain, and yet there’s also the clear feeling that they’re both trying, in their own ways, to heal the rift that came between them and at least get back to something resembling friendship. It’s also great that Flash is completely on Rarity’s side in terms of winning Sunset over but also respectful enough of Sunset herself to not talk about things he feels are private or important to her, all while maintaining a certain level of selfishness in the process. He’s nuanced, which is not something I think most people would attribute to him.
There’s also a bit of worldbuilding going on here. There’s talk about what is expected of the students and citizens in general, including how they’re expected to go about seeking careers. It’s blatantly unattached to anything I know, which means either A) Soufriere is basing this on the system where they live, or B) they’re making up something wholly new. I strongly suspect it’s the latter.
Unless you folks know of a place where skipping school is actually considered illegal, and the police can arrest you specifically for doing so, and the government mandates that you register a formal decision to go to college or do menial labor for the rest of your life. I’ve certainly never heard of such things, but hey, it’s a big world full of all sorts of cultures of various shades of draconianism, so who knows? Point is, Soufriere went out of their way in this story to expand upon the world a little more, and of that I approve.
Also, one has to wonder A) what kind of agreement Sunset has with the school that she can effectively not go to any classes or take any tests and still be fine, and B) how it is Vice-Principal Luna has enough political pull that she can scare the shit out of a police officer who is just doing his job. I want to know more.
All in all, this story has been a highlight in the long-running series for its multifaceted nature. I’m more invested in where it’s going now than I’ve ever been, and for once it’s not just to see if Rarity can ever summon up the metaphorical balls to actually tell Sunset how she feels.
…
Still not sure her situation qualifies as being rejected though.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Sasha — Pretty Good
Highs and Lows — Pretty Good
Exes Meet — Pretty Good
A Midsummer Day's Quest — Worth It
Death Of The Author — Worth It
Paper Girl
81,312 Words
By leeroy_gIBZ
Sequel to Rarity's a Sociopath
Cadance just informed Rarity that she is to find a way of breaking up with Twilight immediately. Considering Twilight has been her meal ticket for the last ten months, it left her in a foul mood. How does this lead to her standing on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere next to a stolen police car with a dead skateboarder in the trunk? It’s complicated.
Rarity’s a Sociopath was a fascinating story about a Rarity incapable of feeling quote, “pity, compassion, or remorse.” Medical condition, y’see. She was quite the devilish woman, but had taken great pains to make decisions that would, to an outside observer, appear moral and ‘good’. Not because she was good, not by any means, but because she believed it to be the best path forward for herself.
This is not that Rarity. Despite this being labeled as the sequel to Rarity’s a Sociopath, leeroy outright admits in an author’s note that this is not the same character. This is more like an AU that is similar to the previous story’s world, but with the main character swapped out with someone wholly wicked. Apparently, leeroy thought that would make the story more interesting. It’s a pity; I really wanted to see a story starring that Rarity, not this utterly detestable doppelganger. But it’s the story we got, so…
I stated before that the previous version takes every negative trait of Rarity – real or imagined via audience misinterpretation – and combines it into one individual. I was mistaken; this is that Rarity. She’s narcissistic, selfish in the extreme, a habitual liar, regularly hypocritical, manipulative, cruel, petty, spiteful, kleptomaniacal, violent, and plenty of other things I’m sure I’m neglecting. Just about her only redeeming qualities are her good looks and her taste in music. She seems to hate everything that isn’t her and lives for only a few things: good food, good clothes, and hot sex. If you are not offering one of those things – preferably all of them – then you are nothing to her.
But that’s not limited to just her. The entire world in this story is like this. Everyone is mean to one another. Well, almost. There are the rare exceptions, like Lyra, Pinkie and (maybe) Shining Armor. But everything in general is shit in this world, from an Equestrian Twilight Sparkle turned Sombra-esque dictator to Principal Cadance despising her husband and becoming Crystal Prep’s new Cinch. It’s like the author wanted the world to be an extra-mean caricature of reality and took it to ridiculous extremes.
I don’t know why leeroy chose this route. What’s more interesting, a shit person navigating a shit world or a shit person struggling to belong in a good world? I’d vote the latter any day.
Despite my general displeasure at the overarching shift in everything, I still found this story hard to look away from. Like a train wreck. I couldn’t help but wonder how our wicked protagonist would lie, steal, or kill her way out of the current predicament with her reputation – legal or otherwise – intact. Despite her attempts at being perfectly logical in her approach, her narcissism and temper get in the way to lead to a cascading wave of bad decisions and worsening situations. It all comes to a head when she finally encounters the one person in existence she knows to be her physical (oh la la!) and mental match. Which is, of course, herself.
Not gonna lie, I enjoyed it. Yes, I do mean “enjoy”. This might be an utterly vile Rarity, but she’s still Rarity, complete with the ‘darlings’ and melodrama and ‘a-lady-does-nots’ (that last usually quoted immediately after doing the topical thing a lady does not). It was curious seeing her in this new mode, and while I can’t say I rooted for her – quite the opposite, in fact – leeroy made it regularly interesting to watch her work. With every new interaction I was thinking “now, now she’ll finally find her back against the wall!”. Sometimes she did indeed end up like that, but only in ways she enjoyed, and her skilled tongue (oh la la!) and quick escapes were always soon in the coming (pun intended).
There’s just something fascinating about watching bad people being so good at being so.
This isn’t the worst Rarity I’ve ever seen. That dishonor still goes to Wellspring’s All About Rarity, not least because that wicked version could still feel pity, compassion, and remorse and chose to ignore said feelings. But this one definitely takes the #2 spot.
All that said, there are a few more technical issues. For example, the story is littered with typos. Not enough to be a major problem, but certainly enough to be noticeable, and they always pop up at the worst times for immersion. There’s also the question of character behavior, which is most obvious in Twilight. When she first appears in the story, she’s a weak-willed, mousy individual. Rarity easily gaslights her into believing that Cadance’s negative view of their relationship is her fault. But when she next makes an appearance, she’s this confident woman who doesn’t take any of Rarity’s shit and calls her out on every lie she makes. It’s a total personality switch. An argument can be made that Twilight finally got the wool pulled from her eyes thanks to the mistakes Rarity made, but to me it felt more like leeroy altering Twilight’s character to fit the direction they wanted the story to go.
If watching a corrupt woman navigate a corrupt world with a combination of skill, sex appeal, and ruthlessness sounds like the kind of ride you’d want to go on, then by all means get a ticket. Just know that leeroy isn’t pulling punches here and characters will die. I’d say “beloved characters”, but given how warped they are in this story I don’t know that such a term applies. If you’re not into bad people doing bad things without anything resembling breaks, then you’ll want to steer clear. I’m putting it on the middle ground, because while I liked it it’s definitely not going to be for everyone.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Crystal Apocalypse — Pretty Good
Rarity's a Sociopath — Pretty Good
The Love Bug
2,740 Words
By GreyPon3
Requested by LH45
As the Princess of Love, Cadance has a thing regarding self-styled matchmakers. Any time a pony somewhere claims to be able to match ponies, she takes it upon herself to investigate them. They are always charlatans taking advantage of her element to scam ponies out of their bits. One such pony has started up a business in a remote mountain village, and so Cadance comes calling to put her in her place.
The cover art spoils the concept, so: Post-A Canterlot Wedding Chrysalis, with her horn shattered and her memories lost, lives as a humble matchmaker, apparently unaware that she’s a changeling or why her empathic abilities are so flawless.
There’s not much to this. It’s one of those “here’s an idea, the end” types of stories. Usually I have a lot of disdain for those sorts, but GreyPon3 manages to write in a way that makes it feel like a proper story unto itself, so I don’t mind in this case.
A simple “what if” tale about Chrysalis unwittingly turning a new leaf. If that sounds interesting to you, read on.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
New Author!
2525: A Space Oddity
11,470 Words
By ROBCakeran53
Alternate Title: Reminiscence of an Awesome Childhood
Luna and Celestia. Royal. Experienced. Retired. Bored. But then Luna notices a star that seems to be approaching Equestria. She drags Celestia into a little investigation, which leads to some curious consequences. Looks like Equestria is about to get some extrastellar visitors.
What’s that? You’re tired of humans in Equestria? Fear not, for there’s not a human to be seen! Only… their appliances?
This operates on the concept that humans, set for extinction and well aware of it, decided to place powerful A.I. software into old (sometimes really old) tools and send them into space to explore and share the human experience with any sapient race they encounter. Thus do Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Cadance find themselves having diplomatic talks with… uh… a talking, self-powered vacuum cleaner. They then get to visit said vacuum cleaner’s spaceship, where they meet other sentient appliances. These include but are not limited to an evil car (that is not Christine, surprisingly), an eternally depressed microwave (who probably keeps losing his cord), a red radio blaring Little Richard (IYKYK), and a cell phone with the attitude of a rebellious teenager (because what else?).
This was a silly story that seems mostly intended to celebrate and/or poke fun at various elements of general human culture. In that regard it works wonderfully. It is packed with cultural references and leans heavily on princess-based humor, with Luna’s endlessly excessive exuberance being a highlight. I found it entertaining from start to finish.
Read this if you’re feeling like a bit of nostalgia for your late 80’s and early 90’s childhood. Or if you like the idea of the four princesses of Equestria being silly while talking to animated appliances, I suppose.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
My Little Dashie — Pretty Good
Not-Yet-Princess Twilight Sparkle and the Tale of the Dark Empress of Teatime
24,449 Words
By kudzuhaiku
Filly Twilight is upset. Princess Celestia decides that teatime is in order, so as to ease the frazzled filly’s nerves. Now Twilight is wondering why teatime can’t be all the time. To Celestia, it is a prime opportunity to teach her student about the importance of empathy. If only it didn’t come from such a painful reality…
Although not labeled as such, this is a tragedy, and the contents are dark enough that I question kudzuhaiku’s decision to rate it only E. It is set in the Weed-verse, but is designed such that it can easily be read separate from that gargantuan AU. All except the epilogue, that is, which relies heavily on the AU. But that’s fine, because there’s no actual need to read the epilogue if you don’t want to get caught up in that web.
Anyway, the story is set in two time periods. The first is filly Twilight having teatime with Princess Celestia. Twilight just got one-upped by Moondancer (exactly how is unclear) and is most displeased by the fact. Celestia is trying to teach Twilight to look at things from Moondancer’s perspective, which is proving… tricky. Twilight’s innocently foalish question about tea time is the perfect segue into a story regarding Celestia’s previous student.
The second is the actual story, in which a rebellious and callous Sunset Shimmer is sent on a mission by Celestia. Apparently there’s this little mining town in the boondocks that has been taken over by a unicorn calling herself “The Dark Empress of Teatime”. Sunset would prefer to just waltz in, start burning things, and throw her political weight around. Unfortunately, Celestia strictly instructs her to use the ever-pointless and time-wasting methods of, ugh, diplomacy and friendship.
The story alternates between Sunset’s story and Celestia and Twilight, the latter often because of some interruption in the story. At one point Celestia admits that she has to embellish some elements of her story to Twi on account of not knowing all the details, but I very strongly suspect the Sunset side of this story is the actual events as they transpired instead of what Celestia is telling Twilight.
Characterization is one of kudzuhaiku’s strengths, and it really shines through here. Every character has something that makes them interesting. Sunset Shimmer is bitter, cynical, and – to grossly simplify things – in her rebellious teenager stage. She’s considering the idea of trying to replace Celestia as ruler of Equestria, and it’s difficult to tell if she’s merely venting her teenage frustrations or serious about the idea. Given some of her thoughts regarding the story’s villain, it’s entirely possible it’s the latter.
Cutting into this is filly Twilight, who isn’t the goody-four-shoes we often associate with the moniker. This filly is snarky, opinionated, emotional, and straightforward. There’s a certain brutal honesty to her, a willingness to be open about her feelings at any given moment. Celestia has her hooves full with this little pony, who has the (sometimes welcome) audacity to tell Celestia that she’s doing something poorly. I love how she immediately interrupted Celestia’s opening monologue to inform her that it was cliché and unimaginative, and also that Celestia actually changed her opening to accommodate.
Twilight’s and Celestia’s scenes are fun, and do a great job of rejecting the “perfect teacher/student relationship” often assumed between them. In contrast, Sunset’s story gets very dark very quickly, touching upon subjects of mind control, soul consumption, cannibalism, and arguably grooming. What happens to Sunset here is terrifying, what she gets out of it is horrible, and the whole story can be thought of as her ultimate fall from grace before Celestia and she finally broke things off.
In summation: this is not a happy story.
The epilogue is a lot trickier to judge. As I said earlier, it deviates from the rest of the story by being set many years later and providing direct links to the expansive Weed-verse. If you aren’t familiar with that AU, you might be lost. Which is actually possible even if you are familiar with it, because the verse is spread out across a great many stories, the order of which isn’t clear unless you actively seek out the timeline, so it’s entirely possible you’ve read a dozen or so stories but didn’t read the pertinent ones for understanding everything the epilogue is referencing (speaking from experience). My advice: unless you have a thorough awareness of this AU, skip the epilogue. The story works just fine without it.
Overall, I felt this was one of kudzu’s better works. It’s a hard-hitting tale that is hard to look away from as things get more and more disturbing. Kudzu’s characterization shines as usual, and is elevated by the looming sense of worsening consequences and the mistakes that lead to them. If you’re into dark stories, you’ll probably love it.
Bookshelf: Why Haven’t You Read These Yet?
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals — WHYRTY?
The Weed — WHYRTY?
Princess Twilight Sparkle's School for Fantastic Foals: Winter Break — Pretty Good
Twilight Sparkle and the Very Confusing Apocalypse — Pretty Good
When Consequences Come Home — Worth It
RED - Rock Farmers, Extremely Dangerous
4,410 Words
By ChibiRenamon
Igneous Rock Pie is… *cough*... enduring a concert put on by his daughter and led by DJ Pon-3 with his wife and other daughters. It’s how Pinkie shows her love, and he appreciates that, so he puts up with it. Then he spots an assassin moving to take down the so-called “musician”.
I wanted to read this when it first came out, if only for how rarely I see stories about Igneous, but alas, I already had a ChibiRenamon story in my queue at the time. Now I’m finally here, and I must say it was worth the wait.
What we have is a highly entertaining piece in which Igneous, his wife and one of his daughters demonstrate that picking a fight with a Pie is a bad idea. After which he has a talk with the assassin’s employer, one Princess Luna, who hates this so-called “music” as much as he does but is much more… aggressive in how she deals with it. In reality, the talk between Igneous and Luna is the core of the story.
This story is not one to be taken seriously. The ideas behind it are so much fun and the writing style so amusing that if you did take it seriously you’re missing the point. Beneath the exaggerated fighting prowess of the Pie Family and Luna trying to weasel her way out of accountability (and a stern lecture from her big sister) is a story about knowing when to accept that times are changing and, if you absolutely must do something about the said changing times, approaching it in a positive way.
The epilogue at Vinyl’s expense was icing on the velvet cake.
Give this a go if you’re looking for a silly, somewhat wise good time.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good!
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Even Emvoweling — Pretty Good
Conquering is Easy, Being Conquered is Hard — Pretty Good
Lämp — Pretty Good
For twenty years now, the changeling Flitter has been living the life of a happily married unicorn by the name of Swift Star. Then the Canterlot Invasion happens, the Love Bomb goes off, and his form is revealed. Which begs the obviously difficult question: what now?
This was a curious one. It largely involves Flitter and his wife Morning Rain trying to find a way to get him back into Equestrian society without him being torn apart by an angry mob or getting imprisoned in the place he’s banished to. It includes a visit to his old hive in the Everfree and a diplomatic crisis.
There’s some quirkiness that I put down as Nyerguds trying to depict a show-like pony society. For example, there’s one scene where Flitter does get chased by ponies with torches and pitchforks, but when they finally catch him they don’t really know what to do with him. Like dogs chasing cars, if you will. Or when Flitter and Morning Rain meet their son, who doesn’t respond to the fact his father is a changeling much. Or the time they walk into Ponyville and the general reaction of the population is to shrug and go about their day because, y’know, it’s Ponyville.
Loved Pinkie’s reaction to meeting Flitter. Just sayin’.
There are a few issues. I felt that Morning Rain’s rapid turnaround from “You’re not my husband!” to “You’re still my husband and I love you.” was nonsensically fast even by pony standards. There’s also the fact that their son, Blueprint, only appears for an extremely brief scene and then disappears from the story entirely, forgotten like he never existed in the first place. They left the Everfree via Sweet Apple Acres in the first place, their son adds nothing whatsoever to the overarching story, and they end up going back to Ponyville to talk to Twilight. In short, Nyerguds could have completely skipped that chapter and this story would have lost nothing.
Even so, I liked the story overall. It explores changeling culture and biology and provides some generally interesting characters to follow. It’s not a bad tale by any means, especially for changeling lovers.
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
Fallout Equestria: Day of Cabbages and Turnips — Pretty Good
Superdeterminism
1,591 Words
By Cloud Hop
Princess Twilight Sparkle is a supremely powerful magical being. Also, immortal. And as an immortal supremely powerful being, when the planet that once held Equestria withered away into dust she lived on and created a whole new one, complete with its own sun. And when that died, she made another. But entropy never stops, and in trillions upon trillions of years there will be no universe anymore. Twilight’s solution: try to create a universe without entropy.
Cloud Hop seems to have a thing for supremely powerful alicorns. Would that make them an alicorn supremacist? It begs the real question for this story: if Twilight is Forever, what about the other princesses, who don’t get so much as a mention here?
This is a universe-scale story in which the immortal, godlike Twilight Sparkle experiments with reality in an effort to recreate an Equestria that won’t eventually succumb to the ravages of time by virtue of entropy not being part of its physics. It’s a curious tale, and it went almost exactly where I expected it to.
I liked it. The grand scale, the capable pacing, the way it gets to its point without overstaying its welcome. Even the way Twilight has mentally devolved to the point of no longer valuing life in general, as evidenced by her habit of destroying her failed universes, even the ones with sentient life, because they don’t meet her precious criteria for what life should be. It’s fascinating, and also a little scary. The only reason I’m rating it on the middle ground is because I’m not sure about its reach (which might be ironic, now that I think about it).
Bookshelf: Worth It
Previous stories reviewed for this author:
I'll Kill You With My Tea Cup — Worth It
Tʜᴇ Cᴀʟᴀᴍɪᴛʏ — Worth It
Bonus Review: The Black Pearl
140 Pages
By Scott O'Dell
Ramòn Salazar is the heir of the prestigious Salazar family. The Salazars are pearl farmers with a fleet of four ships, based in the town of La Paz in Baja California Sur. Ramòn just turned sixteen, and at long last his father is willing to train him in the art of pearl appraisal and diving. More than anything, Ramòn longs to find the Pearl of Heaven, a legendary black pearl said to be hidden in the waters nearby. But to find it, he’ll have to contend with the Manta Diablo.
The Black Pearl is a Young Adult novel written way back in 1967. I first read it as part of a literary program in my old middle school. I read hundreds of books for those programs, but only a handful of them stood out and remain in my mind. This is one of them. I lost track of my copy, but my mother found a first edition print and gave it to me for Christmas. I couldn’t resist giving it another go.
The story follows Ramòn Salazar, a teenager being groomed to take over his father’s pearl fishing business. While learning the tricks of the trade he meets Gaspar Ruiz, commonly referred to as The Sevillano for his claim of originating from Seville, Spain. The Sevillano is a habitual liar and braggart, constantly telling bigger and more ridiculous stories of his own heroics. He is also dangerous, known for his bar fighting, but Ramòn’s father puts up with him because the one thing he’s not lying about is being the best diver in the fleet. Ramòn, determined to put the Sevillano in his place, decides to find the Pearl of Heaven.
Throughout the story we hear legends of a gargantuan manta ray, the Manta Diablo. It’s the sort of story mothers tell to their children to get them to behave. According to the legend, the Manta Diablo was originally a demon that was forced into the oceans by a local priest. The creature is something akin to a Moby Dick for the Gulf of California.
Scott O’Dell’s writing is very simple. For my copy the text is somewhat large and widely spaced, and every few chapters an image appears depicting the current events (gotta admit, I wasn’t crazy about Milton Johnson’s chaotic art style). These things are all fine given the target audience. I will say I feel the writing style forces the reader to build up their own emotional investment for the events, as there is little in the way of narrative ambiance. But again: simple style for a young adult audience. I think it’s fine.
There are some curious elements of the story, which comes off as a coming of age tale for Ramòn Salazar. Scott O’Dell goes through a lot of trouble to describe the everyday lives of the people of La Paz. Even more interesting is how devoted the author is to the local geography and culture. If you bother to look things up you’ll find that Scott isn’t making things up: all the locations specified are real, and many of the local phenomena he references are factual. Checking his biography, I learned that he specialized in this kind of thing, especially for the regions of California and Mexico. It is this cultural flavoring that gives the book much of its charm.
Overall, I enjoyed rediscovering this one. I think I’d soon like to re-read the other Scott O’Dell book I am familiar with, The Island of the Blue Dolphins. If you have any pre-teens needing a good read, this might be something for them to consider.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Stories for Next Time:
Page One. by Miro MM
A Swap They'll Never Forget by ItsVelvet
The End of the Beginning by Kris Overstreet
Ghosting by KorenCZ11
Nothing Beside Remains by kissfromarose2
The Twilight Effect by evelili
In Amber Clad by Lucky Seven
Seashell by Winston
Six To Eight Weeks Dungeon by ocalhoun
The End of a Quest by wYvern
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Need some editing done? Working on a story and not sure how it’s shaping up? I’m now doing editing and critique commissions! Check here for more information and PM me if interested.
Honestly, I use AI because I am bored. But I've also started thinking it could be used to help get across an idea I have for a commission (because my ability to describe some of my ideas isn't the best.)
Granted. I've only done it once. But the end result came out awesome.
I had pretty much the same reaction to The Ponyville Files. Satisfying and fun little exploration of the concept, especially from a new author. The ship intervention at the end diluted it somewhat, though. Also, while many entries for that contest felt squashed to fit in the word limit, this one felt a bit unnecessarily stretched to reach the max it didn't need to. But that's minor, as things go.
The author had intended to make a sequel, but it's yet to materialise, though given it would deal with the ship at the end more directly, I don't think it'd be my thing anyway.
Read RED – etc. for the Ancestral Tribute contest, and it was a delightful bit of kooky nonsense fun for me too. Honestly, more so than all the fics about Twilight's folks, I think I most enjoyed the takes on the Pie parents there, and this finding common ground, if differing stances, between Igneous and a recently-returned Luna is one of those ideas you don't know could work until you see it done.
I have of course read Flitter during my early Fimfic days (2018-2020), being a highly-read "changeling fall out after A Canterlot Wedding" fic that was only a novella, and thus easy to squeeze in. Does sound a bit rough-n-new now, from all those show-like tonal lurches that haven't been adjusted for the medium displacement. But I suppose there's worse things to befall an eleven-year-old fic.
I admit to distraction, for Octavia's Last Night just got the 'reviewed' notice a little while ago, yet appears to be further back in the queue.
AI art is hard to generate? Naw...
i.ibb.co/TWfCtGG/Celest-AI-Says-No.jpg
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I had not considered it until last week's Mark Trail (if you're unfamiliar with it, it's a newspaper comic that often deals with environmental issues) talked about the impacts of AI. According to them, each prompt submitted consumes about a glass of water to cool the machines. So when lots of people will sit there submitting prompt after prompt, and the sheer number of people doing so, it adds up quickly.
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I remember Mark Trail, but I haven't seen it in a long while. That one-glass-of-water estimate is generally correct. The water isn't necessarily lost by cooling the GPUs; it can be cooled back down and re-used. (I've got a stack of three Nvidia cards that does just that.) But it's a really good indicator of how much wasted heat (energy) is involved. Bitcoin mining and AI generation both have incredibly high energy and cooling demands. That's one thing that makes the whole-Earth-turned-into-computronium scenario in stories like Friendship is Optimal so highly unlikely: getting rid of the generated heat would be a nightmarish engineering problem.
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Mark Trail changed its writer/artist maybe a year or two ago. It's interesting to see how it's altered the focus. It used to be about conservation, parkland, and appreciating nature. It's shifted to be more about environmental issues. I don't still have last week's paper around, but I think in addition to the amount of water involved, they made the point that a lot of the computing centers doing the AI prompts are in dry climates where water is relatively scarce.
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Oh yeah! I think some people are proposing to build a huge computing center (practically an entire town) near Eagle Pass, Texas, which is bone-dry country! (Also dead-cheap land, which is probably why they chose such an inhospitable spot.)
I believe that the system, with enough iterations, will overcome that, and sooner than you think. The problem with the mentality about AI is that it develops much faster than we can consider. As my friend getting into programming put it, in 10 years, his job wouldn't be to actually build anything himself, it will be to prompt an AI to do it instead. And in 20 years, that job will also go away.
That's not to say that it isn't a tool or anything, but if you thought that the rapid advance of technology from the 1950's to 2000 was something, I think the next 20 or so years are going to be very interesting. For example, we have working 3D printed rocket engines that are going into space. This is of course also built with AI and the iterations improve in a fraction of the time It takes regular manufacturing to produce it.
AI is the next internet. The market for human input is going to shift in a dramatic way and jobs are going to disappear some places and reappear others. Things will change, just make sure you aren't clapping before you can't take it back.
I'm unapologetically hardline when it comes to my stance on AI. It's a solid, unmovable no.
It boils down to a matter of solidarty with fellow creatives in different fields. I wouldn't want someone skimming my writing to generate a story. Likewise, I'm sure many artists wouldn't want me generating an image for my writing. Thusly, I find it to be absolutely disrespectful to the artists who had their stuff skimmed who didn't want to be used in a generative algorithm. Even if AI eventually wins the legal battle and AI "art" becomes the norm, in my mind, if the training data contains even one image from an unwilling participant, it is morally wrong no matter what the Terms of Service binds you to so you can actually show someone your work.
I also don't want to reward the act of generating AI cover art, so I will never read any story that has AI generated images in its cover. I don't blindly thumbs down them, but if you're not going to respect someone who is honing their craft by drawing, I don't see a reason to respect yours in writing. And just because we're giving our stories away for free online doesn't mean we should be comfortable with generating "free" covers at the expense of those who ask to be paid for their work.
I usually search, sometimes for hours, for cover art candidates. When I find something, I do my best to find the original and send a message to the artist that has art that I would like to use as a cover. Some folks have moved on for various reason and don't want to interact with MLP anymore, I totally get that, so I only do one or two messages. If they don't respond and they've been inactive for several years, I'll use the art with the understanding that they can message me to change the cover any time. I haven't been asked to take anything down yet, but I am prepared to go coverless until I find a suitable replacement. I'm not saying this because I want to grandstand as "holier then thou," I just don't want to normalize filling in skill gaps with AI.
AI should be a tool in the toolbox, not the replacement for creative effort. Leave it to science and discoveries, not expression.
For published commercial work I'd sworn myself against AI. For one, the efficacy of it is incredibly dubious and more importantly I have too many artist friends and connections that I don't want to hurt and even potentially accidentally plagiarize, and also I'd very much lose those very valuable connections.
I don't think using AI itself to conceptualize things is a bad idea. It's actually quite good and can serve as a powerful search engine, but to make money? Eeeeeeeeh no.
On happier news, so glad your editing service is continuing to take off :D
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I never considered that angle. I might just do that next time I have a commission to make.
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I often read and write reviews for stories weeks or even months in advance of their release. Most of the stuff I'm reading now won't have their reviews come out until late May, for example.
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Well, I'm certainly never going to read that comic if I can help it.
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Hopefully it'll steal my job from me only after I've finishing making a living off of it.
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I know this probably will never be the case, but as a hypothetical: what if the art style used by the AI is taken with permission of the artist who developed that style, and said artist earned money from its usage?
You're more thorough than I am, but I do similarly. I only send out one message, and if I don't get a response after a week then I assume they're MLP-dead and use the art with the caveat that it'll be taken down if said artist finally does respond and complain. In the last ten years, I've only had one artist contact me after a week.
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Oh, that's not the case at all. Haven't had a client in months. But then I haven't been advertising it outside of the notes at the bottom of my blogs and a small spot on my user page. No attempts to take it outside of FIMFiction. So reality is I haven't been trying to make it big or anything. It's just a service I offer should anyone deign to take me up on it.
I've thought about taking it beyond FIMFiction. Maybe AO3, or to some freelancer website. I simply haven't bothered to try yet.
Don't have much of an opinion on AI and machine learning yet. It's still so early in their development and use that I'm withholding judgment. Though, it's very likely that this upcoming technology will just integrate with what we're currently using without us even knowing. Kinda like how 5G was hyped up to be this huge advancement and now it's just another feature in our smartphones.
As for today's batch of stories, I don't think I read any of them. But, I did read The Black Pearl and The Island of the Blue Dolphins for school, just like yourself. I have a fondness for treasure hunt stories so The Black Pearl was a delight. I would later wonder if the Pirates of the Caribbean movies took the name of the book to use for Jack Sparrow's ship.
The Island of the Blue Dolphins I remember being kinda of a downer in terms of tone and concept. Seems like survival stories are not things I am fond of.
I'm going to stand with 5765173 in this debate. AI-generate art is, and always will be, a big, giant nope.
I believe AI can do wonderful things. Math, science, games, and more. But creative pursuits? Things like art, writing, music amongst others? No. No, no, no, no. Humans have been gifted the capacity to create meaningful, beautiful and expressive art. If a computer is going to replace that, then what are human feelings good for?
As someone who writes and dress in the regular, AI-art pisses me off in a way that little else does. The whole purpose of art is to share your thoughts, feelings and emotions and convey them to the rest of the world? A machine has none of that.
And like Rego said, AI is a tool, not a replacement. The term “AI-generated art” implies that AI created the entire image, which is... just no.
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Eh, it's not so bad. Often enough it's just an informative piece about a particular plant or animal, and when it does get environmental, it doesn't go anywhere I'd call radical, mostly things you can do locally to conserve resources.
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Then yeah, totally fine. It goes from theft to Vocaloid. Folks are free to dislike Miku, but no one has been stolen from. The VA was definitely paid for her work. We'd just have to see how many artists would take the deal they were offered. This hypothetical also assumes the tech is actually interested in making such an offer in the first place. Ask for forgiveness rather than permission and then keep doing it anyway seems to be the MO.
We've made the mistake of buying into big tech promises before. Social media, the gig economy, just Elon Musk in general, etc. I get we want technology to advance, but when the tech is decoupled from human progress, what's the point? I'm not a luddite, just someone who is sick of seeing control of technology being used to hurt people and their livelihoods. I'd like to meet Commander Data someday just like anybody else, but not if he's built on the backs of the immiserated. If that's the case, then you can count me among the number of The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas.
I'm wayyyyyyy late, but thank you for the kind words about RED! A "silly, somewhat wise good time" is exactly what I was aiming for, and I appreciate you breathing some new life into this fic!