Laws and... · 8:57pm Last Thursday
Random Person: “So, Paul, what did you do this past weekend?”
Paul: “Oh, you know, just spent a few hours untangling pig intestines and putting them on metal funnels like condoms.”
Random Person:
Technical Writer from the U.S.A.'s Deep South. Writes horsewords and reviews. New reviews posted every other Thursday! Writing Motto: "Go Big or Go Home!"
Need some editing done? Working on a story and not sure how it’s shaping up? I’m now doing editing and critique commissions! Check this link for more information and pricing and PM me if interested.
People keep asking, “Hey, I see you added my story to a bookshelf! Are you going to review it?”
I book it, I review it.
No exceptions.
62.56% (361,967 / 498,858)
7.57% (7,983 / 105,445)
These stories did well enough to hit the feature box!
Bulletproof Heart: The Great, The Powerful, and the Bulletproof
Bulletproof Heart: The Pony on the Roof
Bulletproof Heart: Sunset at Little Longhorn
Cutie Mark Chronicles: Limestone Pie
Lyra Heartstrings and the Bench of Doom
No Heroes: Hot Chocolate at the Isekai
The Gentle Nights: Audience of One
Anthropomorphic
2nd Place
The Barcast's Halloween in April Contest
Study of Generosity
2nd Place
The Barcast's Make Rarity Not Garbage Contest
The Fourth Season
Honorable Mention
Oroboro's Sunset Shipping Contest: Changing Seasons
What is Missing, What is Lost
1st Place
Rage Reviews! seventh F*** THIS PROMPT contest
One Night at Fluttershy's
3rd Place
Skeeter the Lurker's Switcheroo! contest
Ordinary World
Overall Winner
Transformations group's Body Swap Contest
Twilight's Inferno
1st Place
Badass Twilight = Total Domination group's Banished, Exiled, Forgotten contest
Rules for Requesting Reviews
Want to request a review? There's no 'correct' way to do it. PM me, comment on my blogs, comment on my user page, it's all good. As soon as I've acknowledged the request I'll go into my Review Schedule and add yours to the queue. Just remember: requests are always first come/first serve. There are a few rules:
Long Stories
As of February 8, I have only 13 slots left for 2025!
A story is considered "long" if it is 70,000 words or more. I have a policy of reviewing one long story per blog post, but that means I have a strictly limited number of slots available and requests are competing with sequels or stories I selected on my own. To keep this from getting out of control, I will only open the schedule for a time period to the end of the next year (so if it's currently 2022, the schedule closes when 2023 is fully booked).
There is no upper limit on the wordcount for requested stories (current record: 2,020,000), but I will not bottleneck my schedule with a lot of huge stories and may reject them if I feel like they're going to cause a scheduling issue.
No Clop
Have I read clop? Yes. Do I review clop? Not often. My reviews are for stories, not blatant fap material. That said, every once in a while one slips through the cracks. If you can convince me that there's actually a story under all the mess, then I will consider it.
Incompletes
As a general rule, I avoid reading incomplete stories. I tend to make an exception to requests, but I reserve the right to decline incompletes.
My Long Story schedule is completely booked for 2024. This means that if you want to request a story longer than 70,000 words, you will be waiting until sometime in 2025 for that review. I cannot guarantee it'll be "early" 2025, either. Just something to keep in mind.
This schedule lists the stories that are set to be reviewed every week. The next six weeks are always included. I may have more than six scheduled, but only the nearest six will actually be visible at any time.
The day-to-day reading schedule, which dictates what I will read and when. Mostly meant for my own use in limiting how much I read every day, but kept available to the public for the sake of transparency.
The archive. Contains a list of every story I've ever reviewed with links to both the story and the review.
A Brief Look Into The Insanely Detailed World That Is Paul's Mind
Read this if you want to see what I go through every Saturday to deliver to you folks a weekly review blog. Be warned, this thing is overbearingly detailed.
A while back I started posting blogs detailing stories that I conceived but don't expect to ever write. The link below is to an index of all these blogs.
Random Person: “So, Paul, what did you do this past weekend?”
Paul: “Oh, you know, just spent a few hours untangling pig intestines and putting them on metal funnels like condoms.”
Random Person:
Thanks for the fav!
Thanks for the add brodie 🙌🏼 hope you enjoy it when you read it!
I hope you are doing well.
i.pinimg.com/236x/f3/6c/75/f36c75a47973f536810f206da86fd3bb.jpg
I’m so nervous, but thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to review my fic.
3360852
It's only the one week warning. I really should relabel that bookshelf...