• Member Since 16th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 17 minutes ago

PaulAsaran


Technical Writer from the U.S.A.'s Deep South. Writes horsewords, and reviews both independently and for Seattle's Angels. New reviews posted every Thursday! Writing Motto: "Go Big or Go Home!"

T
Source

Ten years ago, Twilight made the ultimate sacrifice in order to defeat Tirek. Equestria has been in a state of civil war ever since.

Canterlot has at last fallen, and the six heroes of the rebellion now go to face the ultimate challenge: defeating the godlike Twilight Sparkle. What they expect to be a brutal, hard won quest for glory and Equestria's salvation turns into something entirely different... and now they face a choice.


This story is a reaction piece against the Tyrant Sparkle trope.

Special thanks to Absolution for pre-reading and Danger Beans for proofreading.

Cover art credit: BluestreakFUS

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 646 )

ARGHABBLARAGH! THAT CLIFFHANGER! YOU EVIL LITTLE - :twilightangry2:

I love the alternative take on what happened. Instead of making the deal, continuing to blast Tirek and eventually coming out on top. Though why doesn't she consider looking into Tartarus? Or did Tirek put them elsewhere? Hmm.

But still, you ended it just like that! I don't want to imagine how it ends, I want to read how it ends! You do it better than I can!:flutterrage:

Well that was something new... and interesting.

I assume that the open ending is so that the readers can decide what they think will happen in the end. Personally? I have a feeling that Big Mac might embrace her, possibly even bring to her attention the existence of Tartarus (don't ask me how since he's mute).

I both liked and disliked the speech Twilight gave the faux Bearers. Not because I thought it was cliché, simply because it was a bit repetitive with the whole "I will not disgrace her memory." That's what I disliked about it.. What I liked, however, was how she told them just what the Elements were about without actually lecturing them or belittling them, using only cold, hard facts.

I don't quite know how a civil war erupted from Twilight choosing to blast Tirek to kingdom come rather than give up her magic, but I think it was a nice setting to use and one that made quite a bit more sense than the various Sombra-fied Twilight fics.

All in all, good job.

4516385
Actually, the whole 'where are the other princesses' thing is something I wanted to intentionally leave open... so yeah, who knows?

But ending it at the cliffhanger is symbolic. This story is meant to ask the reader: do you want this to continue? Or, to be more accurate:

Do you think Twilight is a tyrant?

4516387

This story was 100% reactionary and certain things were made to intentionally not make sense. No exact cause behind the rebellion is given specifically because it's meant to reflect all the Tyrant Twilight stories that exist: they don't make sense. (At least, not to me.)

But yeah, I'll acknowledge that Twilight got a little repetitive on the 'will not disgrace their memory' thing, but I think after 10 years of watching these so-called 'freedom fighters' blaspheming her friends' good names it would be a rather hot focus for her.

I like it.

4516425 Yes I want this to continue, no I don't think Twilight is a tyrant, just someone stuck in a lose-lose position.

Welp, this was neat.

4516446
Let me re-iterate what I mean by "Do you want this to continue?":

Do you want these Tyrant Twilight stories to keep showing up over and over and over again on FIMFiction? How much more pain do you want her to go through?

4516469
Ah, but is it a good neat or a bad neat? :trixieshiftright:

4516485 a horrible neat, I will never read anything from you again.

No, but srsly, this is well-written stuff. I haven't read many stories that focus on Twilight being a tyrant, but it was enjoyable nonetheless.

I'm favoriting this. I'm favoriting this because my mind just freaking blew up.

4516497
Well then I thank you! :twilightsmile:

4516534

I apologize for the brain matter on your screen.

My two questions are:

(1) Who did Twilight marry, who was then slain by Scootaloo? The only clues you give is that he was a male orange pegasus.

(2) Why is Scootaloo repeatedly described as "red," when she's orange?

Your story was awesome. I especially liked your list of replacement Elements, and the fact that you mixed generations with them.

4516571 Eh, it's okay, I've been keeping a vast amount of cleaning supplies for brain-stan removal in my house ever since I first started reading Half-Life G-man theories.

Oh, nononononono sir. You can't give us a cliffhenger great like the Pacific Ocean!!! :flutterrage:

P.s. beautiful story :pinkiehappy:

4516583
I'm fairly certain it's supposed to be Flash Sentry.

As for the story itself, I liked how you deconstructed a lot of the typical Tyrant tropes. It made for a good read and I like the amount of detail you put in; just enough for me to picture the important bits and leave the rest to my imagination. Overall a good read. Thanks!

I really enjoyed reading this. At this moment I'm going over a couple of your other works, and to be honest I'm quite impressed.
While I could make the argument that Twilight refusing to do anything with her power would have been worse than using it with the possibility of abuse, I'm not. Everything's relative and I don't want to put a negative on something so well put together.
When talking about the whole Tryantlight fad in the fandom, it isn't supposed to make sense. Like the League of Humans Acting Villainous, (which I am half way proud and ashamed of to be a part of,) Clop-fics, and all the other fads, Tyrantlight is just that. A fad. I don't think it was supposed to be taken as seriously as some of the other works on here, (though it is a lot more credible than LOHAV, I will admit that,) but the original concept was just supposed to take the concept and run with it. Have fun with some dark story lines or black humour, that kind of thing. Overall though, none of that really matters. The reasoning of the story doesn't always necessarily matter after all. What we have here is a good story, and one to be proud of too.

4516583

a male orange pegasus.

Totes not Flash Sentry.

No, really, because Flash Sentry is a waifu-stealer who deserves to d--

Oh... wait...

Shit. :trixieshiftleft:

4516583
1) Correction, he was killed while killing Apple Bloom. And I left a clue in the color: it was Flash Sentry.

2) Did I describe Scoots as red? Oops. I'll have to find where I did that, 'cause I thought I described her as orange.

4516605
I know, I finally got there! Never thought this would be the story to pull it off.

4516614
Why thank you!

And the cliffhanger is meant to ask the reader a question: do you want to continue to see Twilight subjected to this pain via more Tyrant Twilight stories?

4516615
I appreciate the praise!

4516583
Male orange pegasus with a possible love interest for Twilight?
Warning: fanrage incoming.
Flash Sentry

4516642
I know that feeling :twilightsmile: It's nice to see a story you write suddenly appear in the feature box, or get so popular that it tops everything else you've written... It's a nice experience, to say the least :pinkiesmile:

As much as I think the ambiguity of the ending helps this story, the reader in me is begging to know what happens to this Equestria...to Twilight. Hell I wanna know if Big Mac grows his balls back, or Scoots, or Sweeite...

4516642

It looks like now you're finally getting the attention you deserve.:pinkiehappy:

4516635
I appreciate the praise, and the critique on the story's purpose. I won't bother debating it, because honestly it all makes perfect sense, but I will note that another reason I don't like Twyrant stories is because it's just such an obvious concept, especially after "Twilight's Kingdom."

4516637
I find myself wondering how many people are thrilled I added that tidbit...

4516654
I think some of my other stories are better, but I also think this is a general topic that isn't touched upon often – if it's ever been touched upon, that is – which is a big reason for why I suddenly decided to write it.

But it's nice to know that after a year of development I finally managed it. :rainbowdetermined2:

4516657
I get that lots of people will be wondering about that, which is all part of the point. But defining the end would have spoiled the entire point of the story, and I'm not sure if I'll ever make a sequel just on that basis.

Now a prequel, on the other hoof...

4516662

And it feels good.

And thanks again for the support a few days ago. It actually meant a lot to me.

4516699

Also you're featured and you got 6699 double inverted dubs.

4516662
And I just noticed your blog. HOLY SHIT and THANK YOU are both in order.

I usually use the "Favorite" button as a means of keeping track of ongoing stories. Because of this, I often remove stories from my favorites list once they are complete.

This story deserves the opposite. It was complete when I read it, but it deserves to remain on my favorites list despite that.

4516706
I know, something that isn't about clop or HiE or LOHAV got in there! Keeps getting better and better, I swear.

4516716
I appreciate the compliment!

...

My fingers are gonna get tired if I keep replying to every comment like this. :derpytongue2:

4516652

Oh yeah! I forgot that his coloration could be described as "orange." (It's yellowish-orange or orangish-yellow if you ask me, but sure!)

I like how you don't tell us what happened next. Well done there. Oh and the rest of it was good to.

4516763
Many many thanks!

>story labeled 'complete'
>comments warn of cliffhanger

No thanks. I can appreciate an author's desire for open endings, but I despise them. I like to read stories, not read half a story and be forced to 'write' the ending myself if I want any sort of a conclusion. As to the sentiment in [4516482]: Twilight Sparkle is a fictional character. These stories aren't actually hurting her, not even her image in the fanbase considering there are far more stories in which Twilight is not a tyrant. If your reasoning for ending on a cliffhanger is to symbolically ask readers if they want a semi-popular story premise and/or setting to stop being written altogether to spare the imagined feelings of a fictional character, then that only serves to further kill my interest in reading this story.

I don't intend this to be a hurtful comment, and certainly not as an impotent threat to withhold my valuable addition to your view counter unless you continue writing. I wrote this comment with the intent of explaining why I am passing on this story instead of simply passing quietly, without the author ever knowing why anyone might decide such.

ymom2 #35 · Jun 8th, 2014 · · 1 ·

Tyrant Sparkle does not imply Evil Twilight. Everyone has a little bit of evil in them without realizing it. So if one person- or pony- has the power to enact everything they believe no matter how well intentioned there will be conflict because it is impossible for that person to have perfect ideas and judgement. If you wield power like a king or dictator you will always be a villain or tyrant to someone.

The essence of Tyrant Sparkle is what happens because Twilight has such power. I too do not enjoy some of the edgy one dimensional fics where Twilight goes insane without proper explanation or organic transition.

So, your story's existence begs the question: Would you like your story to join my competition? :pinkiehappy:

Edit: I was talking about what my intention was when I created my group Tyrant Sparkle.

I had to 'try' not to feel sad about reading this story :fluttercry: not that there's anything wrong with that, i just have this nasty instinctual habit of going 'hard wall' against showing emotion... I dislike that.

However, i can totally agree there with the idea here :D everybody loves the 'evil villain' concept but it's intensely rare to see the 'reluctant villain', nevermind the 'only a villain because someone thinks/says they are, but they really aren't' concept, and i don't think i've ever seen a proper 'understanding the villain who isn't really a villain' concept more than a couple of times in my whole life XD

That was beautiful. I think most "Tyrant Twilight" fics are written with tongue firmly in cheek, but I sympathize with your feelings about them. I felt much the same when Pinkie Pie was turned into a psycho-killer-cum-supernatural-abomination in almost every fic and work of art at one point. Thankfully, we seem to be getting away from that, and Pinkie's back and better than ever. And Twilight Sparkle is a sweetheart and definitely one of the most selfless and altruistic cartoon characters I've ever seen (and I've been watching cartoons for over fifty years), so I hope everyone knows that canon Twilight would never go down that road.

However, as much as you and I might disagree with these fics, their authors have the right to express their creativity in these ways. There's nothing wrong with defending Twilight/Pinkie/whomever, but...um...I wouldn't invoke what they "think" about it, because--most unfortunately--they do not really exist. And believe me, I really wish they did.

4516776
To each his own. I merely have a vested interest in the life of the characters I write about: I make them important to me because it makes it easier to write about them. Others don't develop that kind of connection, and that's perfectly fine.

I do appreciate your input, though. I'm sorry the lack of a concrete ending stops you from giving it a go.

4516482

Um... It's a nice story, but dark!Twi stories are fun. You can not like them of course, but I would be heartbroken if such awesome stories as Breaking Twilight, Twilight, Revised, Grimoire, and many others had never been made. Characters don't go through pain like people do. Whatever pain you perceive in them is your own. It's the job of those stories to detail how Twilight might fall from grace, might rise to power, might become a little more ruthless, a little more alien, a little more "alternatively moralistic." Part of what makes those stories okay is that the character is fundamentally different to begin with, but more key to the idea is that no one is uncorruptable. Given enough stimulus, anyone will fail to live up to the exacting standards of the Internet. To everyone reading this, all three of you, I recommend the original universe comic series Irredeemable, which depicts a Superman expy's fall into evil, and why and how he got there. I have sadly only been able to read the first volume. :ajsleepy:

Oddly enough, I think Mac will kill her; not as an act of revenge but an act of mercy. He simply isn't cruel enough to let anypony live with such a burden of sadness for one second more than they have to.

4516799

I really love Pinkamena. I wanted to write a story once of a dark alternate universe where Nightmare Moon won a millennium ago, and Pinkamena is a sort of executioner-cum-serial killer, who adds flair to her job like no one else. Scootaloo and Diamond Tiara become her apprentices, and they mature under her tutelage as Equestria goes to war against Griffony. I also wanted to give every pony a "special talent," or power. Scootaloo was able to see the near future, dependent on the decisions of everyone around her. I don't remember anyone else's, unfortunately. Good thing I made notes. Bad thing I lost them.

Blade is a pretty damn nice story though.

4516785
I never intended for it to look like I thought all 'Tyrant Twilight' stories were centered around Twilight becoming evil, but I can see how that miscommunication was made given my author's comments section. I suppose I should have spoken with a broader scope in mind.

Your offer to let my story join amuses me, because A) I've already entered a Badass Twilight = Total Domination contest (via Twilight's Inferno) and B) one of my editors is competing in your competition.

But y'know what? Sure, throw it in there!

4516794
I'm glad to have provided you with something a bit more original! Originality is both a major goal in my writing and a serious peeve I have in the writing of others, so this kind of compliment is among my favorites.

4516799
As I've mentioned to others, I have a vested personal and emotional attachment to the characters I write. I grant that's not something most people do (I think?), but it helps me to evoke the characters a bit better. Or so I feel. I actually cry for my characters as I do terrible crap to them.

So while I understand that they're not real – being able to break that attachment is just as important as being able to keep it – I felt this was something that needed to be said.

4516821
I suppose I can see the 'nobody is incorruptible' argument, but I can't see what would make Twilight go in that direction save force (as mentioned in my author's notes). Perhaps it's just my headcanon, I don't know.

But as someone who has put Twilight through hell (literally), I wholeheartedly disagree that all Twi stories need to be bright. In fact a lot of my material intentionally defies the idea that Equestria is a world of eternal sunshine and rainbows.

'Tyrant Twilight' is/was a thing? I find that surprisingly odd at how our fandom could think that way, nevertheless, your story is a great one that really touched my heart.

4516843
That's a distinct possibility, but I would think salvation and redemption would be great motivators for her continued rule.


4516885
I'm glad you enjoyed it! PS - your Flutterbat avatar is the cutest thing ever.

37.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1rkzpHj1n1r6aoq4o1_500.gif
Somebody call Lady Gaga in here, cause this man deserves a f*cking APPLAUSE! I, too, never liked 'tyrant Twilight'. It just seemed too… drastic a turn for her. She's naturally… how shall I put this… subservient? Yeah. Even as a villain, she's more a Soundwave than a Megatron. Here? She's thrust onto a throne she didn't want, and sh*t went to hell because she never got the training she needed to maintain that position and appeal to everypony. Oh, wait… My bad. She CAN'T appeal to everypony, because that's downright IMPOSSIBLE. She did what she could. and what does she get? The label of 'tyrant', of course. And then her friends' memories are tarnished by those who would prefer to see her as an enemy of THE VERY IDEALS she still stays loyal to THROUGHOUT THIS LITTLE MISHAP, and they insult said ideals with WAR, DEATH, AND PAIN.

Well, there's my wall of text. Up-voted and faved, my friend. You have EARNED it.

4516880

I fucking love Blade.

4516897
And I am appreciative. :twilightsmile: I'm sure Twilight would be, too.

I somewhat dislike the word 'tyrant' because I often tend to refer to its olden usage. But that's just a personal peeve of mine.

4516776
There's a difference between 'incomplete' and 'open-ended'.

The story presents a question you have to answer on your own. It doesn't have a literal ending, because any such would be cheap. Thinking up the ending is left to the reader. You really don't need the two variants of the final short paragraph to be spelled out. You know what they would read. You don't need them. You just need to make a choice between them on your own. And think what that choice means.

Oh, also, you don't read half the story and make the other half. That would be assinine.
You read 99% of it and make the remaining 1%.

4516882 Alright, then put a small link to the competition somewhere in your story description indicating participation and add it to this folder. I can add it to the folder for you if you so wish. Then it will be submitted!

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