Never the Final Word (Vol. 2)

by FanOfMostEverything

Crystal Waters's Disambuguation (Estee's "Jury Duty III: Summoned With A Vengeance")

Author's Note:

[Comedy]

This was the end result of idea-bouncing in Estee's blog "Jury Duty III: Summoned With A Vengeance" (183 words, no tags)

JURY DUTY III CONTEXT: Estee got assigned another round of jury duty way too soon and asked which ponies should be company for that misery. Chrysalis proved a popular choice, especially if every one of her false identities were called in at the same time and she'd need to use underlings (heh) to make up the difference.

Considering the design of the benches in the juror's waiting area, any pony forced to sit down would shortly be shifting themselves in a fruitless attempt to find a comfortable position. Junebug would be a perfect example of this were there not other, more interesting sources of discomfort to observe.

The other jurors had entered the office as a group and from the way they acted, Junebug thought they might be related except that, based on what her friend had told her, Junebug was under the impression that the courts tried to avoiding having multiple members of the same family in the one jury.

Although they'd eventually passed Vapor Lock's trial, Junebug was a little uncertain whether they were meant to be here as they had begun arguing shortly after they entered the waiting area.

"I'm Susurrus, you're Onyx Regime and she's Black Opalescence!"

"I thought I was supposed to be Onyx Queendom. Who's Onyx Regime?"

"You are!"

A glossy grey pegasus gleefully announced, "I'm Spartacus!"

"Noling is Spartacus, you idiot!"

The argument stopped dead as the other jurors -- Junebug was now positive they were related -- turned to look at Possibly Susurrus.

"Nopony is Spartacus?" Probably-Not-Spartacus suggested.

"I think I might be." Said Maybe-Spartacus.

"Look at your documents! For Ch- Celestia's sake we all literally have papers that tell us which pony we are!"

"I can't read mine."

"You're holding it upside-down! Give it here."

Junebug resumed trying to find a less uncomfortable position on the bench. Things didn't seem as bad as her friend had said it would be; certainly less boring anyway.

Comments

[Admiral Biscuit]

What if we're all Not Bad Horse?

[FanOfMostEverything]

9084689
Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if one of Chrysalis's early aliases was literally named "Bad Horse."

[Admiral Biscuit]

9084704
I can say for a fact that Bad Horse’s alias is Not Bad Horse.

[CrystalWaters]

Hey wait a second!

9084704
While I can't speak for Chrysalis, I'm tempted by the prospect of her naming herself 'Best Horse'.

[CrystalWaters]

Oh gosh. I just noticed the pun in the title.

Disam-bug-uation.

I'd been mentally correcting it each time I read it without realising.

[FanOfMostEverything]

11504407
Making punny titles for the minifics is half the fun of curating this collection.

[Void Knight]

I love how the one actual pony in the bunch is the one with a bug-themed name.